"Are you diabetic or have any heart problems?" The doctor asks me while examining my breathing. 

"No and no." I say, taking a deep breath once again. 

"Does your family have any history of diseases important to recall?" He asks me, writing something on his board. 

"Um, my dad died from a heart condition, it wasn't functioning right." I say, taking a hard swallow. Its been a while since the last time I thought of his death. "Is there any chance I got the same thing as him?" 

"I don't know but it is possible, depends of what type of disease he suffered. Even though you don't have any symptoms of heart failure." He says with a face like in thought. "But don't worry just now, okay? Let's get your blood sample first and start from there. The nurse will take you." 

"Thank you, Doctor." I stand up, giving him a smile even when I'm nervously dying inside. 

"You can call me Kevin." He says with a smile, finishing writing on his board. 

"Come with me, miss." The nurse says guiding my steps. When we step outside of his office Harry stands up from the waiting area. The doctor didn't let him be inside, he was just too nervous. 

"Babe, are you alright?" He comes to me right away, holding my face. "What did the doctor say?" 

"Harry I'm fine. We just arrived." I chuckle, kissing his hand and taking them off my face. "The nurse is taking me to take a blood sample. Just... Calm down, okay?" 

"Yeah, yeah of course. Yes." He says, trying to take a deep breath. "I'm calm, I'm chill." 

"Aha." I say, giving him a reassuring smile. "Can he come with us?" I ask the nurse. 

"Of course." She smiles at me, nodding her head. 

She sits me in a black chair and prepares the needles. Harry kneels in front of me holding my hand, caressing the back of it making a pattern. I can see he's nervous, his eyes look lost and they lack that spark it had an hour ago. I didn't want to leave the restaurant, much less in the middle of the evening and right after his question, I feel so guilty. 

"I'm sorry for ruining your birthday." I say as the nurse places a press around my upper arm. "We didn't even make it to the party." 

"Babe, you didn't ruin my birthday." He says with a tender smile on his face. "It has been the most perfect birthday I've ever had. And besides, you are way more important than a party." 

"A-Ouch!" I feel the pinch but in just a seconds the sting goes away. "But... I have been planning it for two weeks. I wanted you to see it, it was perfect." 

"I'm sure it was but don't worry." He takes my hand a places a kiss on it. "We will have a thousand more parties to enjoy." 

"The doctor is waiting for you at his office." She says to me after placing a band aid over the pinch. 

"Okay." I stand up and Harry follows me, holding my hand in his. 

We walk in silence, he's never quiet so that only means he's really nervous. 

"You do know you don't have to worry about anything, right?" I glance at him, his eyes are focused on his steps, green tense eyes pointing at the floor. 

"I know, I know, I just..." He sighs, taking slow steps to the doctors office. "The thought of you being sick just... It frightens me, that's all."

"I'm not sick." I give him a smile, stopping my feet and taking both of his hands in mine. "Its a first for us, thank God we have been healthy this past year. For all we know this can just be a simple virus." 

"You're right. You're totally right." He gives me a nervous smile. "I will try to stay calm." 

"That's my boy." I go on my tip toes and peck his lips, going inside of the Doctor's office afterwards. 

Just like before, I go inside by myself. The doctor keeps doing his check-ups and keeps asking me questions. What kind of food did I ate in the past week, if I had any drinks or eat seafood. If I have been with a lot of stress lately, if I had a good night sleep, and so on. He keeps writing on his board and just when he finishes the nurse cames in with the blood results. 

He checks it and writes something else on his board. 

"I have a few questions left and then we're done here. Okay?" He says, turning his eyes to me this time. "Tell me, Sienna. When was the last time you had your period?" 

"Um, last month? Or before that? My hormones had been all crazy since the pregnancy but my doctor said that's normal." I say trying to remember the last time I had my period. I think it was on christmas, if I remember correctly. 

"And are you using any contraceptives?" He asks, a tight smile on his face. 

"I've been on and off with the pills, they weren't really working for me. And... you know... Condoms.... From time to time." I say, half lying. Now that I think of it, we haven't been that careful lately. 

"That makes sense." He says, standing up taking his board with him and walking to my chair. "Well Sienna, the blood results are fine. You are in fact not sick." 

"Really?" I smile, leaving a relieved sigh out. 

"Yes. But... There's a reason why you're feeling all of these symptoms. Dizzyness, blurred sight, cold sweats, even vomit." He explains to me while he rests his weight on his table. "You... You're pregnant, Sienna." 

My heart stopped beating right there. 

"What?" I quietly yell, bringing one eyebrow up. "Are you... Are you sure?" 

"Yes, I am. The blood results never lie. That's why its the first thing we check." He says in half a chuckle. "Congratulations! You're having a baby." 

I'm having a baby. Another baby. 

"What?" I ask again, I think my lungs are not receiving any oxygen right now. 

"I will give you a minute to process the news." He pats my shoulder, standing up and then walking to the door. "I will let Harry inside in a few minutes. Is that okay?" 

I don't respond, I just stare blankly at his desk with my mouth wide open. 

I'm... I'm pregnant. Again. 

I'm... I'm having another baby. 

Oh my God. 

I'm having another baby! 

How... How did th... Okay, I'm well aware of how this happened but, its... Its too soon? I mean, I had Jack like seven months ago? I was just getting used of not being pregnant and now I'm pregnant, again? 

Oh my God I'm pregnant. 

I'm pregnant!  

"Harry!" I scream, almost instantly the door slams open, Harry appearing on the door. "Harry!" 

"What? What happened?" He looks worried, widened eyes looking at me. 

"I'm pregnant." I say, not as happy as I should be. I'm shocked, so shocked. I don't even know if I'm ready to have another baby. I don't even know if I'm ready to be pregnant again and I am. 

"WHAT?!" He instantly smiles, his mouth falling to the floor and his eyes glistening right away. "Are you serious?!?" 

He comes running to me making me stand up and hugging me tightly, I hug him back but not with the same emotion as him. He notices, so he releases me and looks at me. My eyes are lost, looking at nothing in particular. I just... I just don't know what to think. 

"You don't look happy." He points out. With one finger he softly moves my jaw up making me look at him. "What happens?" 

"I..." I sigh, I don't even know what to say. 

I take a step back, hugging my stomach and taking a few steps away from him. 

I remember when I found out I was pregnant with Jack. It was a very emotional moment for me. I was alone with a white peeing stick in front of me. Then, the next day, a blinking dot in the monitor at the doctor's office That was what made me realize I was in deep. 

I was alone, with no way of telling Harry I was pregnant. I had an entire pregnancy experiencing everything by myself. Molly was the only one that took care of me, holding my hair every time I threw up, supporting me in my change of mood, going with me to buy new pair of jeans every month. It wasn't easy, it's painful, I'm not going to lie. 

And finally, the delivery. I was completely alone, not even my mom was there. Yeah, it's a beautiful experience but it hurts. A lot. Just to think I'm going to live all of it all over again? 

It's too much to handle. And even more in less than a year. 

"Baby?" Harry walks to me again. "Say something." 

"Can we go home?" I say, turning around and finally looking at him. 

He only nods his head, his smile erasing from his face. 

We leave the doctor's office in silence. Harry talks to the doctor, he only tells me to have a lot of rest and then he gives me an appointment for next week. Then, we leave and get in the car to ride home. 

I know I should be happy, a small part of me is. I'm just shocked, its too much to handle after everything I've been through these past few weeks. We weren't careful, not even a little. 

And I think of it, of all the changes I'm going to suffer again and I don't think I'm ready. 

This time will be different though. This time I'm not alone, Harry is with me. I have experience, I have learned a lot of things and I could say I'm trained, but I'm not mentally prepared to live it all over again.

How far am I?  

We finally arrive and I didn't even notice. Neither of us move, we stay in the car in silence, he doesn't even turns off the engine. 

"Do you want to go inside?" He asks, moving his eyes to me. He's being really patient with me, he's acting incredibly well. 

I nod my head, glancing at the clock in the pannel that reads six past twelve. It's really late. 

We walk inside, everything is dark, only one light on in the kitchen. I walk straight to our room, taking my dress off and throwing myself in the bed. I cover myself with the duvet, still thinking of all of this. 

I'm pregnant. 

"Sienna?" I hear Harry approaching to the bed. He the sits on my side of the bed, not looking at me but making sure to be close to me. "Do you want to talk?" 

I remain silent. I can't believe it. 

My eyes are focused on nothing, I don't move and I even feel like I'm not breathing at all. 

Why am I acting like this? I shouldn't be. It's like if I were scared. Well, I am. I'm scared, I'm happy, I'm shocked, I'm nervous, I'm not prepared for this, I'm everything and nothing at all. I'm all of this and I shouldn't be. 

But I am. 

Harry sighs, resting his elbows on his kness and holding his face in his hands. 

"Please say something." He says with a deep voice, breaking my heart a little. "I'm dying inside." 

I wait for a few seconds, it takes all of me to give him a reply. 

"I'm not ready." It's all I say, it sounds blank, emotionless. 

He shakes his head and then stands up, running a hand through his hair and then walking away. 

I don't move, I just stay on the bed feeling everything and nothing at all. 

Minutes pass and I'm still in the same position. My mind is full of thoughts but for some reason I'm just not processing all of this. Why can't I just be happy like I was when I found out I was pregnant with Jack? What is stopping me? I don't have nothing to fear and still here I am in negation. 

There's a baby growing inside of me and I'm in denial. What is wrong with me? 

After a couple of seconds, I hear steps coming inside of the room. Harry sits down on my side of the bed again, his back facing me. He stays silent, and so do I. 

"Sit up." He says after a moment, with a serious tone but its still soft, making me obey his words. 

"Harry..." I look at my hands, feeling an achy feelling in my chest. 

"You don't have to say anything, Sienna. I understand how you feel. You're confused and scared. So am I." He says, turning his torso around and showing me what's on his arms. There's a sleeping Jack wrapped on his arms, a blanket around his body. It melts my heart, it actually bring tears to my eyes. "And you're right. Maybe we're not ready. We're still new to this parenting thing but... Look at him." 

He moves closer to me, caressing his little head. 

"We made him, babe. And we were way less prepared then than we are right now." He never moves his eyes from him. He's talking with so much tenderness than it makes me cry even more. "He's everything for me, you know?" 

I let out a sob, feeling completely ashamed of all my thoughts. He's right, completely right. 

"Do you want to know what did I wish for this morning? When I blew out the candle?" He says, this time moving his eyes to me. "I only wished to keep being happy with you. And I have never been happier, Sienna. I have everything I want right here with me. And I'm sure my wish will come true with this new gift life is giving me." 

"Oh, Harry." With even more tears in my eyes I wrap my arms around him, making him hold Jack with just one arm and holding me with the other. 

"It's okay baby, it's okay." He says to my ear, running his hand down my back trying to calm my sobs. 

"I love you. I love you and I love Jack so much. I'm sorry." I say in between sobs. I feel really bad, I'm so lucky to have him. He really knows how to get to me in the best ways. He knows me so well, I seriously don't know what I would do without him. 

"You don't have to be sorry, it's okay. It's okay to feel scared." He says, moving my face making me look at him. "We are going to get through this, okay? We're together in this. We're a strong family." 

I nod my head, smiling even with tears in my eyes. 

Yes, we are indeed strong family. 

And growing.