(4565 words)

Keith's POV:

Lance spent the whole day ignoring me, ignoring everyone really. He spent most of the day in the observatory, staring into space. He told Hunk he was counting the stars. He stayed in there through lunch. I spent most of the day silently watching him from the doorway. He looked so lost in thought.

He looks so troubled... I wonder what he's thinking about.

He finally left the observatory for dinner, he walked into the dining room quietly. None of us said anything, not wanting to make a big deal out of it. He sat down and stared at his food, not even picking up his fork.

"Um... Lance?" Hunk hesitantly spoke.

Lance blinked a couple times and looked up, he had been lost in thought again and Hunk's voice pulled him back to reality, "Huh?"

Pidge raised her eyebrow, "Are you feeling okay?

He looked back down, not answering.

We all looked at him, before deciding not to push him for answers. We just ate our food quietly. Eventually, he started eating too. He and I were the last ones to finish.

I was about to stand up to take my plate to the kitchen when he grabbed my sleeve, "Lance?"

He was still looking down, "I've been thinking..."

"I noticed," I sat down again, giving him my full attention.

"Well, I was just wanting to ask you to do something," He was so hesitant, "Will you watch over me again tonight?"

I smiled at him, "That's all? I thought you were worried about something big. Of course, I'll watch over you."

He smiled a tiny bit but still didn't look up.

"That is all, right?" I leaned my head a bit to get a better look at his face.

He quickly stood up, "Yep, see you tonight," he left the room.

He's lying. There's something else.

I ran after him, "Lance, hold up."

He kept walking, "I have to do something, Keith. We can talk later."

I stopped following him, "Okay... Later."

Maybe he just needs a bit more time to think, whatever it is it's clearly bothering him a lot.

I sighed and went to take our bowls to the kitchen, he had left in such a rush and forgot to get his. But I didn't mind taking care of it for him.

All I want to do is take care of him. If only he'd let me.

I walked into the kitchen, where hunk was watching the dishes. I handed him the two bowls, "So, Lance just asked me to watch over him again tonight. That's a good sign, right?"

Hunk nodded, "Yeah, it means he's not pushing us away anymore. Or at least not as much."

"It's my own fault he's pushing me away.." I sighed, "I'm always so mean to him, no wonder he thinks I don't care about him. I say such cruel things to him sometimes... I'm so hard on him.. It's my own fault he won't let me help him."

Hunk sighed, taking a break from the dishes and looking at me, "If you're the one he's pushing away the most, then why would he ask you out of all of us to watch after him? You obviously got through to him in a way the rest of us couldn't. And hearing he's cared for would mean a lot more coming from you than anyone else. We show him we care every day. You don't. So when you show him you care, it's special."

I thought for a moment, "I guess you make a good point." I looked down, "If I can help him with this, maybe it'll make up for everything else... But this morning he went off on me about how he I don't care about him and need to stop pretending I do."

"So prove him wrong," Hunk said.

I looked back up, "What?"

"Prove him wrong. Prove to him that you really do care." He turned back to the dishes, "Actions speak louder than words."

I let that sink in for a moment, "Thank you, Hunk." I quickly left the kitchen.

I don't know how I'll prove it. I've got to figure it out before tonight. 

I made my way to the control room, finding Allura and Coran inside, "Guys, I need help."

"With what?" Allura asked as she closed the screen they were looking at.

I sighed, "Hunk told me I had to prove to Lance I care, and I'm trying to figure out how to do that. He said actions speak louder than words, so I've got to show him with a gesture instead of verbalizing it."

Coran nodded, thinking, "You know, he's very homesick. Understandably so. Perhaps you can do something for him to remind him of Earth."

Allura nodded, "Back before we had to destroy the crystal containing my father's consciousness, I loved going to that room to speak with him and sit beside juniberry flowers. It was like Altea wasn't really gone; like he wasn't really gone. Having that room helped me cope with that loss, it definitely helped with the homesickness.

So maybe if I make something more like Earth for him... It'll help him feel better. And it'll show I cared enough to do that for him.

"What are we using that room for now?" I asked.

"Nothing, it hasn't been touched since Allura destroyed the crystal," Coran answered.

"We considered getting a new crystal so we could have it simulate Altea again, just without my father's consciousness. But I decided it was best to move on." Allura said.

I smiled, "Is there any way we can make that room simulate Earth instead of Altea?"

Allura nodded, "I suppose so. If we get a new crystal, we can use the memories of you paladins to make several different Earth simulations. There were several versions of Altea, I just always chose the juniberry field."

Coran smiled, "I'll go get us a new crystal. You two get with the others and start collecting memories!" He rushed out of the room. We all knew Lance was his favorite, even if he'd never admit to choosing. He would do anything for Lance.

Allura giggled softly, "Let's get all the other paladins together so we can get things ready."

I nodded and we both left the room.

Lance's POV:

I lied to Keith when I said I had something to do, I had just spent the past half hour wandering about the castle and thinking. Thinking about him.

Does he really care? It's so hard to tell if he's being genuine or not. He's always hated me. But now he's acting like we''re friends, saying he only pushed me away so he wouldn't get attached. What is going on with him? I want this to be genuine, but if it's not and I end up trusting him... It's best to assume he's being fake.

I approached the lounge room, I heard voices. I peeked inside and saw the entire team, except Coran, sitting together and whispering about something. I could only pick a few sentences here and there.

"We should get his too." "No, he can't know." "Quiet, lance might hear us." "Coran should be back with it soon."

Whatever was going on in there, they clearly didn't want me to be a part of it.

Obviously, they don't want me to be a part of it. I'm just the seventh wheel, I'm so useless. All I'm good for is piloting Blue. And if I was gone they would just find another paladin. I'm a placeholder for the next paladin, someone who will actually bring something to the table and help the team. I'm fucking useless.

I slowly walked away from the lounge room, heading back to my bedroom. I felt tears come to my eyes but I held them back. I turned the corner and bumped Coran, who was holding a three-foot-tall crystal.

"Quiznak, Lance! You scared the bagolions out of me!" Coran exclaimed as he nearly dropped the crystal.

I helped him steady himself, "What are you doing carrying around a big ass crystal?"

"Oh, um, nothing. Just, uh, maintenance. We, um, needed a power crystal for Pidge's new project! Yes. You know her, always tinkering away with something. We didn't have anything in the castle powerful enough for her needs so I got her a power crystal all her own." He chuckled a bit.

That's obviously a lie. It must be for whatever they were whispering about back there. Mierda, even Coran doesn't want me to be part of it. Am I really that useless? He usually helps me feel better about myself, not worse.

I just nodded, "Well, good luck with that." I walked past him and continued to make my way to the bedroom. This time I couldn't stop the tears from falling, but luckily I was able to keep myself quiet as I cried. I made it to my room and immediately just curled up in bed, now allowing myself to sob freely.

They don't want me here. I'm useless. Blue will stop responding to me one day and they'll replace me. It's inevitable. I'm a liability. I'm replaceable. I bring nothing of value to the team. I'm holding them back. I should've stayed in the airlock, I should've let it kill me. Everyone would be better off.

I cried and cried, bad thoughts swirling around my mind until I eventually cried myself to sleep. But I couldn't have slept long because when I woke up I was in my bed still, no sleepwalking or nightmares. I was woken up by a knock at my door, "What do you want?"

"Hey, it's Keith. Can I come in?" he sounded... different.

I groaned and got out of bed, going to open my door, "What do you want?" I repeated.

He bit his lip before speaking, "I just wanted to check on you, nobody has seen you since dinner. That was like 3 hours ago."

So that's how long I slept. It was only a half-hour after dinner when I came to my room.

"I'm fine, I just wanted to be alone. So if that's all you can leave now and come back when you're ready to go to bed," I was about to close my door but he grabbed my hand to stop me from touching the control panel.

"That's not all, I want to show you something. It's super cool, you're going to love it." He smiled now.

I raised my eyebrow, "What is it?"

"You'll just have to come and see it for yourself." he pulled me out of my room, "Come on."

"Wha-Keith!" I stumbled as he pulled me along, "Slow down!"

He chuckled and slowed down, still holding my hand to lead me to whatever he wanted to show me, "Sorry."

He must be really excited about this.

I sighed and kept letting him lead me down the hall, "Fine, but if it's boring I'm going back to my room and locking you out."

"Trust me, you'll love it," He looked back at me with a smile I'd never seen before.

He led me all the way down to the room where we stored Alfor's consciousness for Allura to interact with, "What are we doing here?"

He just chuckled a bit and opened the door, pulling me inside. There was a new crystal in the center of the room, the one I had seen Coran carrying before, "We've been doing some renovating..." He walked up to the control panel below the crystal and selected something that made the whole room look like the park near the Garrison.

I gasped a bit, "I-It's Earth..."

"Yeah, we all spent the last few hours loading our memories into the crystal to simulate a bunch of locations," he held up a headpiece, "You can add some of your own if you'd like."

I slowly walked over and took it from him, "I can put this on I can program the crystal to show any location I want?"

Keith nodded, "It can show you anything."

I smiled and put the headpiece on, the first location thought of was  Varadero beach. I closed my eyes to picture it, and when I opened my eyes it was there, all around me.

How is this possible? It simulates everything, not just sight and sound. I can feel the wind, smell the salt water. It's beautiful.

I felt myself tear up a bit, "It's exactly the same..."

There's one other thing I want to program in. If it's even possible.

I closed my eyes and this time when I opened them I was standing on my front porch, looking out into the rain. I walked down the steps and held my hand out, I could feel the raindrops hitting my skin. I couldn't tell if it was real water or just the simulation, I didn't care. I just cared that it worked. I walked out into the rain and let it fall on me, I didn't even care to pull my hood up. I let the raindrops slide down my cheeks, mixing with my tears.

"It's really beautiful," Keith said, still standing on the covered porch. I had almost forgotten he was there.

I looked up at him, "You did this for me?"

He nodded, "I needed help, of course. Coran got the crystal, Allura taught us how to program the locations in, and the rest of the team programmed in as many locations they could think of. But yeah, it was my idea."

I walked back on to the porch, "Why would you go through all the trouble?"

He reached over and held my hand, "I wanted to show you I really do care, since just saying it wasn't enough. Coran told me how homesick you are. So I had the other's help me set up this room for you."

I smiled and took the headpiece off before going to turn the simulation off. I was dry now so the rain wasn't real, but it was so close to the real thing I didn't even care. I turned to look at Keith again, "It's amazing. You were right, I really do love it."

He smiled back, "I can leave if you want, let you spend some time alone with it."

"No, I think I should take a break from it before I become addicted," I chuckled a bit, "It's almost time for bed anyway."

He nodded, "Then let's go," he grabbed my hand again and we walked back to my bedroom together.

Once inside we both changed into something to sleep in. I got into bed, he laid a blanket out on the floor.

"Keith, you don't have to sleep on the floor..." I hesitated, "Share the bed with me. We were able to manage it last night."

He blushed a bit, nodding, "Okay," he got up in the bed with me and we both laid down.

I looked into his violet eyes, "You really just didn't want to get attached to me?"

He nodded, "I was just trying to keep you at arm's length, people I care about always disappear. And I cared about you, I didn't want to lose you too. So I kept up a wall between us, I'd rather you hate me than disappear like everyone else. But if I hadn't have done that, if I hadn't have pushed you away... Maybe I would've been able to help you sooner..."

I sighed and held his hand, "I always hated you because you are better than me at everything. You're our ace. You never screw up. You're not clumsy and dumb like me..." I looked away from his eyes now.

"I never thought you were dumb," he squeezed my hand lightly, "But you are a bit clumsy, I can't deny that. But I always thought it was.. cute. And I screw up all the time. You just don't see it. Pushing you away was one of my many screw ups."

I looked him in the eyes again, "You're still so much better than me."

"I don't know about that, sharpshooter. My aim is pretty shit. I've been working on it but my accuracy is still at 60%. But you never miss a shot. Ever." he smiled, "Not to mention you're able to make friends so easily. You're just so magnetic, no one could hate you. You have one of those personalities no one can hate. Yeah, your sense of humor can be a bit annoying at times. But everyone has flaws. No one is perfect. Look at me, I have a resting bitch face and everyone is wary of me at first. The only people who like me before getting to know me are people who think I'm an excellent soldier. With the exception of Shiro, he took me under his wing when no one else was there for me. I was almost sent to Juvy for stealing his car, but he didn't press charges and got me out. He said he saw potential in me. He said because he didn't press charges I owed him one and to show up at the location on a card he gave me. That location was the Garrison. And even though I was top of the class, I was always screwing up. The only reason I wasn't kicked out was that Shiro kept vouching for me. But when he went missing on the Kerberos mission, there was no reason for the Garrison to let me stay. So they kicked me out. But I was already 18 and had nowhere to go... So I found my dad's old house in the desert, I stayed there because there was nowhere else I could go. That little shack I brought you guys to after we rescued Shiro, that was my home for a year."

I frowned, "I never realized..."

He kept smiling, "Me getting kicked out also proves how good you are. When we rescued Shiro you said you were promoted to fighter class because I washed out. If I was top of the class, and you took my spot. That means you were second. That's still something to be proud of."

I smiled a bit, "I didn't think of it like that..."

He kept hold of my hand, "Next time you feel like your not worthy, or that I'm better than you, please tell me. I want to be able to prove you wrong. Because you are amazing, Lance. You might not be the model soldier, but that's overrated. But you are a way better diplomat than you give yourself credit for. That's why Allura sends you and Hunk to celebrations planets throw for us. Because she knows you two will do best in those situations. She knows you'll be able to keep us in their good graces and perhaps recruit them into the coalition. I'd never be able to do that."

I smiled a bit more, "You really think that?"

"I wouldn't be saying it if I didn't," he broke eye contact, "We should probably get to sleep, we can talk more in the morning."

I nodded, "Alright," I closed my eyes, quickly falling to sleep.

Keith's POV:

I woke up in the morning with Lance in my arms.

We must've started cuddling in our sleep...

I let him go but he immediately whined a bit, so I wrapped my arms around him again.

Holding him is helping him sleep soundly... Wait... He didn't have any nightmares last night! Not one!

I smiled and kept holding him, pulling him a bit closer.

I found a way to help him.

Lance woke up after a short while, he blinked a couple time before looking at me. Then he blushed, "Y-you're holding me again..."

"Well, I tried to let you go but you started whining. I held you again because it helps you sleep better. You didn't have any nightmares last night, I think holding you helped," I now let him go because he was awake and seemed a bit embarrassed by it.

"O-Oh.." He avoided eye contact, "I didn't feel scared last night. I felt.. safe."

I moved my head to try to establish eye contact but failed, "Me holding you made you feel safe?"

He nodded silently, blushing still.

I smiled, "Well, maybe I should keep sleeping in your bed. Anything to stop you from having nightmares or sleepwalking is worth it."

Lance sat up, "O-Okay..."

He seems upset.

I sat up too, "Are you feeling okay, Lance?"

He nodded before quickly getting out of bed, "Yeah, uh, I need to go to the bathroom." he quickly ran out of the room.

I frowned and went to my room to change clothes, deciding to give Lance a bit of space.

He's clearly having some sort of internal struggle about something, his mood keeps changing like someone flipped a switch.

When I made my way to the dining room for dinner, Lance was already there. We were the first two.

"Hey, Lance." I sat down next to him with my food.

He was poking his food with his spork, "Hey..."

I frowned, "Are you feeling okay?"

He looked at me, then back at his food, "Honestly... Not Really."

"Do you want to talk about it?" I took a bite of my food.

He looked at me again, "Why now?"

I set my spork down, "What?"

"Why now?" he repeated, "Why now are you telling me all this stuff about not wanting to get attached? How am I supposed to know if you're being honest or not?"

I frowned, "You were getting yourself hurt. Obviously pushing you away was just making everything worse. I should've done it. I screwed up. Big time. And I chose now to tell the truth because I'm pretty sure if I don't you're going to get yourself killed. I swear I'm not messing with your head, that would be really fucked up. I just want to help you before you hurt yourself again."

He looked back at his food, "I really want this to be real, but I'm scared it's not. You said the people you care about disappear. The people I care about don't care about me back, and I get fucked over a lot because I trust the wrong people."

That's why he's been so inconsistent with his attitude towards me, he's afraid I'm just screwing with him like the people in his past.

I reached over to hold his hand, "I swear to you, nothing about this is fake."

He looked at our hands, "You promise?"

"I promise. If I'm lying I'll let you kick me in the dick," I chuckled, he did too.

He looked at me, smiling a bit, "Will you keep staying with me at night? Last night was the first time I've been able to sleep without a nightmare since I left home to go to the Garrison..."

I nodded, "I'll stay with you every night if that's what it takes."

  ⋇⋆✦⋆⋇ time skip ⋇⋆✦⋆⋇

Third Person POV:

"No... No me hagas daño... Please..."

Those were the sounds that woke Keith up. He quickly sat up and looked at the sleeping boy next to him, "Lance, wake up." He shook him a bit, "It's just a dream."

Lance whimpered, his whole body trembling, then he sat up screaming the words, "¡Él me va a atrapar! ¡Tengo que correr!"

Keith quickly wrapped his arms around Lance, trying to calm him by shushing him and rubbing his back, "You're safe, it was just a dream..." he spoke softly.

Lance was breathing heavily but he relaxed into Keith's embrace, "Estoy a salvo ahora, él me protege..." he whispered to himself.

Keith kept a close hold of him, "What was that? You know I'm shit at Spanish, babe."

"Nothing," Lance said as he nuzzled into Keith's side, "Just hold me."

Keith smiled as they laid down again, Lance laid his head on Keith's chest and Keith kept his arm wrapped around him, "It's been a while since you've had a nightmare like that, are you okay?"

Lance nodded, "Yeah, I've got my amazing boyfriend to protect me," he looked up at Keith with a smile.

Keith kissed the tip of Lance's nose, "I won't let anything happen to you."

"I don't feel scared when I'm with you," Lance held Keith's free hand, "I was always scared before."

Keith pulled him closer, "I'll make sure there's nothing for you to be scared of ever again."

Lance chuckled a bit, "Okay tough guy, let's get back to sleep."

"Okay, it's still early. Allura won't be screaming at us to wake up for another few hours." they both laughed.

Lance nuzzled against Keith, closing his eyes. Keith kissed the top of Lance's head softly. He wouldn't be able to fall back asleep. He never was after Lance's bad nightmares. He was too alert, his body was unable to relax. He just held Lance close and kept an eye on him in case he got another nightmare.

Hours passed and Lance started to stir a bit before waking up with a yawn. Keith pretended to be asleep. he didn't want Lance to know he'd been awake all this time.

Lance looked up at Keith, his head still on his chest, "Soy el chico más afortunado del mundo," he whispered to himself before leaning up to kiss Keith softly, "Wake up, Keithy~"

Keith groaned softly before opening his eyes, "Don't call me that."

Lance laughed softly and kissed him again, "Why not, you call me Lancey."

Keith rolled his eyes, "It's different, you call yourself that sometimes."

"You got me there," Lance sat up and stretched.

Keith sat up too and wrapped his arms around Keith from behind, kissing his shoulder gently.

Lance smiled and relaxed against him, "As much as I'd love to stay in bed and let you kiss me all day, we've got to get to breakfast. I'm starving."

Keith sighed and let him go, "Okay, go get dressed."

Lance got out of bed, as he did Keith softly slapped his ass. Lance turned to face him, "Watch it, mister."

Keith chuckled, "You're the one who wore those shorts to bed."

Lance shrugged and turned to change his clothes, Keith got up to do the same.

Afterward, the two headed down to the dining room. When they got there, everyone else was already eating.

"About time you two showed up," Allura said, "We were going over the strategy for today's mission."

Lance groaned as he sat down, "Can we at least eat before we start talking about battle strategy."

Keith chuckled, "He didn't get enough beauty sleep, ignore him."

"Another nightmare?" Shiro asked.

Lance sighed and nodded, "The first one in over a month, so it was twice as bad. But Keith was there so I was okay."

Allura smiled, "Well, we're all glad you're sleeping better."

Lance nodded, "Haven't sleepwalked once since guys followed me to the observatory that one time."

Pidge nodded, "I know. When I can't sleep sometimes I check the cameras to make sure you're okay."

"Whoa, invasion of privacy much," Hunk said.

Pidge rolled her eyes, "The cameras in the halls, not their room!"

Everyone laughed a bit. Keith held Lance's hand under the table.

Lance turned to smile at him, "I'm perfectly okay, thanks to Keith." he leaned over to kiss him.

Everyone immediately started making fun of them. Pidge fake gagging, Hunk throwing a bread roll at them. Keith just pulled Lance into an even more passionate kiss, flipping them all off. Lance laughed into the kiss.

He'd never felt better.

*yo so I had no idea how to end this. enjoy this ending I pulled out of my ass*