"Mum..." Mac and Daniella draw out my name in the specific tone which lets me know that they are after something. 

"Hmm..." I hum back as I fold over the newspaper. I'm getting divorced. Again. I swear they must run this story every time there's a lull in actual news. Unlike normal there are a few things in there that hit a little too close to home, I mean how did they know the sex of the twins? Just a lucky guess? I'll have Sara look into it just in case. 

"Mum, do we have to go back to LA?" My son says quietly as he stands beside my chair. 

"Yeah, Mum, do we? It's much more fun here. We can do whatever we like. We can go outside, go to the park, we can walk to the shops and Grandma is here, so is pops and Nana Pam and Grandad. LA is boring." His sister adds at a much louder volume. This always happens whenever we visit Holmes Chapel and I have to admit I miss living here too. It'll always be home but Harry and I had made a joint decision that setting up base in LA made the most sense for work, flying here, there and everywhere was taking its toll on both of us and eating into the time we got to spend with the kids. 

"No! It's too told here!" Madison yells which attracts Robin's attention who starts whining about needing to get back to see Anlon. And seemingly not wanting to be left out on an argument the twins start kicking too. I can feel the beginning of a headache as four little voices clamber to get my attention. 

"Bambinos! What's with all the yelling?" Harry's voice cuts through the noise briefly before the girls turn their attention to him instead. Their voices ramping up in volume again.

"Come on, we have to go home but it's our last day here, do you really wanna spend it arguing?" Harry sighs. 

"Mum, can we stay? Please? Dad's the only one who needs to go to do the stuff he needs to before tour, he doesn't need all of us-" 

"Mac! No! That is enough!" I snap and I instantly feel bad as the room grows quiet and I see the tears roll down my son's cheeks. I quickly grab him by the shoulders and pull him into a hug as I hear Harry ask if I'm okay. "Sweetheart, I'm sorry I yelled but what you said is not okay. Your Dad loves you and your sisters so much, imagine how lonely he'd be all by himself for two weeks." 

"I didn't think of it like that," he whispers and I breathe a sigh of relief as he hugs me back. "He would miss you too." 

"And I would miss him," the words really hit home as I say them out loud, these last few weeks with neither of us working have been heavenly but having him around more has definitely left me feeling more dependent on him. 

"Can we go walk by the river?" Mac asks before quickly adding, "all of us, you and Dad too!" 

"Walking along the river good with everyone?" Harry asks and I relax as everyone seems to be in agreement. "Okay, everyone off and get your wellies and coats then!"

I smile as Mac gives his Dad a quick hug before running off behind his sisters and Sammy. 

"You feeling okay?" Harry's hands squeeze my shoulders and I twist my head to place a kiss to his left hand. 

"Uh huh. It's just I hate leaving this place too and hearing the kids squabble about it just makes it worse, you know?" I tilt my head back to look at him as his fingers tickle my collarbone and I smile as his left hand doubles back, his pinky tracing over my scar. Despite the shitty reason behind it, I've grown to love that scar or rather I love Harry's love for it, that he sees beauty in it and he finds comfort in running his fingers over it. 

"Yeah. LA isn't exactly homely, is it?" He sighs and I tilt my head back further so it brushes against his grey jumper. 

"You okay?" 

"I'll be fine. Just not looking forward to going back to work, I mean I'm excited about tour, of course I am but it's been nice being able to give you and the kids my full attention," he tilts his head down to look at me. His green eyes are bright and his smile matches mine as he bends down and just as I close my eyes expecting to feel his lips on my forehead he kisses my lips instead. It starts off as a gentle peck but then he comes back for more and it quickly becomes heated but the gawky angle just means it's getting messier and we eventually break out into giggles. 

"Love you, baby." His head moves to place a kiss to my shoulder before he stands up straight again. 

"I love you too but come on, we better get ready or the kids might riot!" I grin as I slide my hand into his as I stand up. 

-----

"Daddy, I told!" Madison whines for about the hundredth time as she nuzzles her face into Harry's neck. He's been carrying her more or less since we left the house and her mucky pink wellington boots are getting mud all over his coat. 

"Aww. My poor little angel," he coos as he pulls her hat further down onto her head. "If you walk, you'll be warmer." 

"'tis mucky!" She huffs. 

"Madi, do you wanna walk with me? We can avoid the puddles!" Mac yells as he hops along the path towards us. 

"No soak me?" She flips her head towards him and when he says "I promise," she wriggles out of Harry's hold. I snap a few pictures as she grabs her brother's hand tightly and my heart swells in my chest as they both giggle while they run to catch up with their siblings and Sammy. 

"Fuck!" I jump as something shoots across the lens and the sound of my husband's laughter lets me know who the culprit is. I lower my camera to glare at him. 

"Sorry, Jess. Didn't mean to scare you," he grins, "jus' wanted your attention," his dimple carves into his cheek as he reaches for my hand. 

"It's not funny! You scared the shit out of me," I scoff. My hand half heartedly swats his away. 

"Baby... I'm sorry," he breathes. His hands find my hips and he pulls me towards him. "Need you t' love on me and let me love on you, please?" His warm breath feels like heaven against the cold skin beneath my ear and causes goosebumps to prickle over my body. 

"You could've just said my name," I reply. I reach my left hand out for his and link our fingers as I sling his arm around my shoulders, my right automatically wraps around his waist as we walk along the path. The kids are only just within eyesight so I yell for them to slow down. "Going back to work won't be so bad, H. We're all still gonna be in the same place."

"I might as well be on another planet," he huffs. "The next few weeks are gonna be tough. Early mornings. Late nights. I'm gonna miss making breakfasts, the school drop off, I won't get to hear all about their days when I pick them up after school and I'm gonna miss bedtimes. I'm gonna have to force myself out of bed when you're still sleeping and crawl into bed at night when you've already fallen asleep. I know it's only a few weeks but I'm gonna miss so much."

"Hey, stop! It's gonna be okay." I hug him tighter. "It'll be over before you know it and I promise to get the kids to call before bed and we can visit the studio when you're not too busy, maybe bring everyone dinner. We'll manage, H." My fingers are gripping him so tightly I'm surprised he isn't complaining but in all honesty I am worried too. Especially about Madison. She hasn't known anything other than Harry being there for most of the day. I don't think she'll adjust well to not being the centre of his universe. 

"I really don't know what I did to deserve you. I know looking after all four kids will be hard on you, especially since you're pregnant and the fact that you plan to make time to care for me too really makes my heart burst. I love you so..." His voice trails off and I hear him sniff as he wipes at his eyes. 

"Making time for you isn't that big a deal, H. I love you and I want to spend time with you, bringing the kids to visit is just a very convenient reason for me getting to see you and hopefully steal a few hugs and kisses."

"Save all of my best ones for you, baby." He peppers my beanie covered head with kisses and it makes me giggle. 

----- 

"Everyone stop right there! All the dirty shoes and clothes in the boot room please?" Jessi yells as I unlock the back door. 

"Hurry Dad! It's freezing!" Robi groans as she pushes in beside me. 

"Patience, my darling daughter," I tease as I move even slower. 

"Dad! Come on, I need to pee!" Dani whines, squeezing herself against my other side. I open the door and five little body's run by me, four into the boot room like Jess had asked and Dani into the bathroom opposite. 

"You okay?" I ask Jess as she steps in the door behind me. 

"Mhmm... just tired," she yawns. Her cheeks and nose are bright red from the cold and I find myself placing a kiss to the reddest spot. "Carrying around babies is hard work." 

"Mummy, I wear jim jams?" Madi asks as she rushes out of the boot room in only her underwear. 

"Madison! I didn't mean for you to take off all your clothes," Jessi chuckles. 

"Well, you shoulda been more clear," Mac adds as he wanders out in his underwear too. 

"Honestly," she scoffs. "Yeah, jim jams will be fine."

Madi lets out an excited squeal as she rushes off, further into the house. Her brother strolling behind her. Robi, Sammy and Dani all appear next, minus mucky wellies and coats and when they all disappear it's just me and Jess. 

"D'you want me in my underwear too?" I smirk, hoping my dimple will help charm her. 

"Dork!" She giggles as she nudges me into the room which is now filled with a washing machine sized pile of dirty clothes. 

"But you love me," I tease while wiggling my finger at her.

"Yes, I love you," Her wide grin makes my body tingle all the way from top to bottom. She presses a kiss to the tip of my finger and I really wanna wrap her up in a hug and never let her go. "Could you help me out of my wellie's please?" 

"Come, sit," I grin, patting the bench. Her coat is already hanging neatly on its peg and she lets out a quiet groan as she sits down. I get quite giddy at the idea that she'll probably fall asleep on me while we watch a movie and I smile happily as I picture her nuzzling into my side. 

"That feels better," she hums as I slide the first boot off, my fingers can't resist wrapping themselves around her wiggling toes and her resulting moan when I massage them softly makes me needy for her in an entirely different way. "You're the best," she yawns and honestly, she looks like she could fall asleep right here. Her eyes are droopy and her head leans back against the wall. 

"Come on, sleepyhead. Let's get you somewhere more comfortable." I slip off her other boot and help her up off the bench. Maybe the kids will co-operate and I can have a little nap too?

-----

"How long have I been asleep?" My wife's drowsy voice asks from behind me. 

"A while," I reply. I want to hug her, but she chose the worst time to wake up, the pepper sauce I'm making for dinner currently requires my attention. 

"Sorry," she sighs and my body tingles with excitement as I hear her feet move across the floor towards me. 

"Don't be. You needed the rest. Dinner is in hand, Robin and Sammy are hanging up the washing and Mac, Dani and Madi are sorting through what they want to take back to LA with them." I feel rather proud of myself. 

"Wow!" She hums and her hands grip my hips. I step back towards her as I continue to stir the sauce, I crave more contact with her. "Can I do anything?" Her words float away as the fingers of her right hand slide along the waistband of my sweats. Her hand dips under my t-shirt and my stomach muscles tense before relaxing into her touch. 

"Jus' stay right here," I beg. The twins press into my back as she tries to shuffle closer and I feel her head press between my shoulder blades. 

"Mmm... sounds good," she kisses my shoulder and my body feels like it's made of marshmallow. I wish I could bottle this feeling for when I'm feeling stressed during rehearsals in the next few weeks. When I feel another kiss through my t-shirt I'm beginning to care less and less about ruining dinner. 

My hand drops the spoon and flies to hers as she begins to retreat from my butterfly. I press her hand flat against me, my fingers sliding across the fabric of my t-shirt and between her fingers. "Wasn't going to go anywhere," she chuckles as she moves my hips from left to right so we are both wiggling in front of the cooker. 

"What are you doing?" I grin as I intertwine our left hands too, I pull her hand around my body so it rests beside my butterfly as well. 

"Dunno..." she breaks into laughter. I can feel her face smush into my back but she's still rocking from side to side. "I think the twins wanna dance." Her words make my heart thump in my chest and I hear her breathing hitch as I suddenly spin her around.

I hug my arms around her bump, her back pressing against my front as we sway to an imaginary beat. "What are we dancing to?" My grin is making my jaw ache but I can't stop it. 

"I dunno," she shrugs. "Sing to me, please?" She whispers as her fingers wiggle themselves between mine. 

"Whenever I'm weary from the battles that rage in my head, you make sense of madness when my sanity hangs by a thread," I sing quietly and she let's out a little hum as her head leans back against my chest. 

"I lose my way but still you seem to understand. Now and forever, I will be your man."

"Pretty," she whispers. I pause as she slips her hands away from mine, I don't want her to disappear. This is nice. "Keep singing, please?" She asks as she raises her arms above her head and links her hands behind my head, I shudder when her fingers brush through my hair. 

 "Sometimes I just hold you, too caught up in me to see, I'm holding a fortune that heaven has given to me." I tighten my hold on her and bump. I truly am a lucky son of a bitch. I crane my neck so I can place a kiss to her forehead. Dancing with her in the kitchen has always made me feel grounded, right from that very first time we danced to Adele in her tiny New York apartment. Things have changed so much since then but not the way we love each other. At some point we became tied together, neither one quite complete without the other, our happiness dependent on the others. I love her so completely that it scares me sometimes. 

"That tickles," she giggles and I realise my right hand has been tracing up the side of her body. Her deep brown eyes stare up at me and I can't think of the words to say what I want to right now so I keep singing the song. I'm yours Jessi Monroe. Now and Forever.