Jessi

It was Wednesday evening. My third day without Harry and I'd just had the day from hell. I was on my way to Zenkichi to meet Lori for dinner. I was afraid I wasn't going to be very good company. I had a massive fight with my friend Tom this morning, he was being an absolute arse and saying mean things about Harry. He'd been picking at him for days and today I finally had enough. He told me I was a dumb bitch for falling for Harry's bullshit so I told him he was being a dick and avoided him for the rest of the day. And just when I thought things couldn't get any worse I found out that I'd been fired from my internship, well not fired exactly but they didn't feel like I could stay there. They were being inundated with phone calls from One Direction fans, wanting to know if they could speak to the guys, wanting me to take their pictures, wanting to speak to me. Even a few journalists had called asking to speak to me. They had said they'd put in a good word for me somewhere else but they wouldn't say where. I slowly climbed the steps from the Subway station and walked to meet Lori.

"Hi, how are you? I'm really sorry about your internship, it sucks we won't get to work together anymore" She pulled me into a hug.

"I'm okay" I shrugged.

"You liar. Don't worry Jessi, you will find something else. You are an amazing photographer. What kind of stuff would you like to do? I know you didn't really enjoy the fashion part of your internship" She smiled as we walked into the restaurant. We were seated at the same table as the other night.

"I'm not sure. I actually really enjoyed taking photos at the concert on Saturday, maybe I could find something like that?" I said and she laughed. "What?" I snapped, my bad mood biting back.

"I don't think somebody is going to pay you to ogle Harry" She kept laughing.

"Very funny" I sniggered. We ordered our food and Lori's phone started to ring.

"Oh. Sorry. It's Niall. He must have forgot I was going out for dinner" She glanced at the screen awkwardly.

"Well aren't you going to answer it?" I smiled.

"You don't mind?" She beamed as she accepted the call. "Hey handsome" She balanced the phone on the side of her glass.

"Hi beautiful, where are you?" Niall smiled from the little screen.

"I'm having dinner with Jess" She pulled me into the picture and I waved.

"Ha. Watch this!" Niall laughed before slightly raising his voice, "Oh. Hi Jessi!" I glanced at Lori who shrugged back at me, she didn't seem to know what he was up to either and then it became clear as I heard Harry's voice. "Why are you talking to Jessi?" His gorgeous face suddenly appeared on the screen. I couldn't stop myself from smiling and my stomach was doing little somersaults at the sight of him.

"She's having dinner with Lori. Hey! Harry give me my laptop back!" Niall whined as the picture went fuzzy before it cleared to reveal a close up of Harry's forehead.

"They're tiny. How do you make them bigger?" Harry whined.

"Well if you give me my laptop back I might be able to help, you idiot!" Me and Lori couldn't stop laughing. The picture went fuzzy again before settling down and now both Harry and Niall were there.

"Hi Baby! Hi Lori!" Harry smiled.

"Hi!" Both me and Lori waved. We can hear more voices and then Louis and Liam popped into the picture.

"Oh for fuck sake! I'll call you later Lori!" Niall sighed and then suddenly they were gone.

"How adorable are our boyfriends?" Lori smiled.

"Pretty freaking adorable." I smiled.

We were about halfway through dinner when she suddenly changed the subject from Niall and Harry and said, "You'll never guess who called me today?"

"Was it somebody famous?" I smiled.

"Ehm no. He wishes" She scoffed. A look of hatred spread across her face. I knew then she was talking about Tom.

"What did he want?" I was intrigued, they very rarely spoke to each other.

"He said he's worried about you, apparently you yelled at him. He said you've never fell out over a boy before and I have to talk sense into you because Harry is going to hurt you. Did you yell at him?" She had a strange, almost hopeful look in her eye.

"I did, yeah. Pretty spectacularly. He'd been rabbiting on for days about how Harry was a womaniser, he's probably had a different woman every night on tour, he has a temper, he's vain, he's selfish, you get the idea. I'm pretty sure he did a google search and just threw every bad thing he could find at me. Anyway this morning I snapped, I'd barely sat down and he started again, he called me a 'Dumb Bitch!' So I finally cracked and yelled, 'Why aren't you happy for me? If you're my friend you should be happy for me!' He said, 'Well I guess we're not friends then' so I just turned and walked away from him and ignored him all day."

"I'm sorry Jess. That sounds pretty horrible" She stroked my arm.

"He'll come out of his mood eventually. I'm more annoyed that he's hiding something from me. He's always honest with me" I sighed.

"Being mean to you is not the same as being honest and he's jealous" Lori frowned.

"Tom doesn't like me in that way and he's not afraid to tell me when I look terrible, that's not being mean" My mood was deflating again.

"Everyone knows he has a crush on you. What did Tom say about those photos of you with Harry, leaving the restaurant? I know he'd have something to say about them" Lori glared at me. I could tell she wasn't going to give up until she'd made whatever point she was making.

"He said blue isn't my colour, the dress showed off all my lumps and bumps and I looked like a hooker" I sighed, his words were a little hurtful, especially since my Mum had always taught me to dress elegantly.

"Blue makes your eyes pop, the dress perfectly showed off your toned body and a hooker? It was knee length and had long sleeves, he's insane. But don't take my word for it, would you like to hear how several magazines who published the photos described you?" I shrugged, not especially but I could tell she was on a mission. "Harry Styles mystery lady sizzles in blue, Harry's mystery brunette shows off enviable body in bold dress, Harry's new lady shows she definitely has Styles. That one was my personal favourite. And if those didn't persuade you would you like to hear how Harry described you in that dress to Niall?" She smiled. My head snapped up to glare at her. You bet your ass I did.

"I thought you might" She giggled before continuing. "He told Niall that the pictures didn't do you justice, that when you walked into that restaurant his heart was in his mouth. You looked like a goddess and he didn't know what he'd done to deserve you" She smiled smugly. She knew she'd made her point. My cheeks were bright red and I had a massive grin on my face. I wished he was here right now. He gave the best hugs.

"So what you got planned for tonight? Do you want to come to mine, we could watch some TV?" She asked.

"Nah. I can't. I have to go home and get started on my latest assignment, I've been putting it off for too long and it's due in on Monday" I sighed.

"The one about the paparazzi. Maybe Harry could help you?" She smiled.

"He probably dislikes them more than me" I laughed.

"Yeah but who said you have to do it from the point of view of the paps?"

"Everyone in the class is" I sighed.

"And since when does Jessi Monroe do what everyone else is doing?" Lori laughed.

"I guess it doesn't actually say which point of view we have to write it from. Thanks Lori." I was kinda looking forward to this assignment now.

"What would you do without me?" She hugged me tightly.

"I'd struggle" I laughed. We split the bill and Lori's Mum gave me a lift home. 

On the drive over I got an email from a recording studio who wanted to offer me an internship, I'd be taking photos of the artists recording there and taking promotional shots for their website. I was so excited that I ran up all the steps to my apartment. I crashed through the door and threw myself down in the armchair, opened up my laptop and quickly sent them the information they'd asked for. I was supposed to go meet with a woman called Jen on Monday after college. I realised then how much I'd just been going through the motions during my old internship. A new energy was coursing through my body. I couldn't wait to get started. I pulled out my phone and quickly texted Harry and Danny.

"Well Done Baby. You'll kill it. I'm so happy for you. I sent you a request on skype. Missing you. H. x" I signed into skype as I got a text from Danny, "Way to go Angel! I knew you'd find something. Your Mum would be proud of you. I'll buy you a drink on Tuesday. Love. Dan."

I felt proud of myself, even though I hadn't really done anything. I accepted Harry's request and it immediately started ringing. I was quite excited to see him. The short time I'd seen him at the restaurant wasn't nearly long enough.

"Hi" I waved. He looked amazing. His hair was soaking wet, he was shirtless and his eyes looked like they were glowing.

"Hey! You look pretty." His dimply smile got wider.

"You too" I was grinning like an idiot. "Why are you wet?"

"Oh practice turned into a massive water fight. How come we haven't skyped before?"

"Because you said it was a pile of rubbish, it always breaks and you wouldn't use it if I paid you"

"That does sound familiar. Did you explain that I'd get to see your pretty face?" He laughed.

"That must have slipped my mind" I blushed at his compliment.

"See, you should lead with that next time. Massive well done on the new job by the way. Just remember, no running away with one of those hot musicians" He ran his hand through his hair and I felt butterflies in my stomach.

"I think I've filled my quota of hot musicians"

"Jesus Harry! And you say my conversations with Pez are bad, you two are making me sick" Zayn's voice surprised me and then he proceeded to make puking noises.

"Shut up Zayn!" Harry threw something at him, I couldn't see what.

"Hi Honey Bunny!" I yelled. "Hey Love-cup!" Zayn yelled back. And we both started laughing.

"Excuse me?" Harry exclaimed.

"It's what Roger and Jessica Rabbit call each other. We were talking about it earlier, I asked Jessi what to draw and she told me Jessica Rabbit because she's hot and she's always wanted a dress that sparkled like hers" Zayn replied.

"That's it. I'm taking you somewhere else" Harry pouted before picking up the laptop and wandering off. He eventually sat down.

"I want a cute nickname if Zayn gets one!" He was still pouting.

"What do you want your nickname to be?" I smiled.

"You have to think of it" He smirked.

"Care Bear?"

"No."

"Love Muffin?"

"No."

"Big Papa?"

"Maybe we can revisit that one in the bedroom" A mischievous grin spread across his face.

"It's too hard" I whined and we both started laughing at that.

"No. Wait, I've got it. The Duke. Because it's basically Royalty and -"

"Because of The Notebook. I love it" He grinned. I was relieved because I had nothing else up my sleeve. Pet names really weren't my thing. The thing with Zayn was more of a joke than anything else.

"So am I right in assuming you are free until Monday?" Harry's smile widened.

"Well kinda. I have an assignment to do. That one about the paparazzi. I've been putting it off for weeks, it's due in on Monday. I was going to ask if I could pick your brain? I could use some help" I got uncomfortable asking for help, I was trying to work on it though. I bit my lip as I nervously waited for his answer.

"Well that would be a lot easier to do in person. Why don't you join us on tour for the weekend?" He looked so excited. I felt horrible for letting him down but there was no way I could concentrate on my assignment if I was there.

"I'd love to but I really have to get this done and besides pretending we weren't together was pretty horrible on Saturday" I felt awful as his smile faded.

"Oh okay" He said gloomily. "And we don't have to pretend we're not dating around management anymore, I fucked that up earlier. Helen knows" His tone wasn't any cheerier.

"How'd she find out?" There was definitely a part of me that was relieved.

"We were doing an interview and I said your name as one of the answers and she put two and two together. And with the help of Niall she confirmed you were Lori's friend and then somebody else told her about your photos so now she has your full name. She's probably learning everything about you as we speak. I'm sorry" He sighed.

"It's okay. It was going to happen sooner or later" I half smiled. I had a feeling he was mad at me.

"I should go" He said abruptly, and his hand reached to close the screen.

"Wait!" I yelled. He paused and looked at me hopefully.

"I more than like you, Styles" I smiled. He sighed.

"I love you Jessi. Just because it scares you doesn't mean it's not true" He closed the laptop lid and I just sat there staring at the blank screen. I felt like the worst girlfriend ever. Literally thousands of girls would die to hear him say those words to them and yet it still freaked me out. I found my phone and typed a message to Lori.

"I think Harry is mad at me"

"Why would he be mad at you?"

"He invited me to join him on tour for the weekend but I told him I can't go, I need to do my assignment. I wouldn't be able to concentrate there. I did the right thing, didn't I?"

My phone started ringing. I answered but didn't get the chance to say anything.

"ARE YOU FUCKING CRAZY?" Lori yelled.

"I'm trying to be sensible. I already had to switch my internship, I don't want to start failing classes" I said.

"JESSI MONROE IF YOU DON'T GET ON THAT PLANE SO HELP ME GOD I'LL DRAG YOU THERE MYSELF!" She took a deep breath. "Please go, have a life, enjoy it! You'll get your essay done, have faith in yourself or at least trust in my faith in you"

"Looks like I have some packing to do" I smiled. She screamed, I pulled the phone away from my ear until she'd stopped. How many people got the opportunity to go on tour with their boyfriend and besides he'd have work to do so I'd have plenty of time to get my assignment done. "Oh do me a favour. Don't tell Harry I'm coming. I want to surprise him"

"Oh my God! This is so romantic. I want all the details later. I love you"

"I love you too" I smiled and hung up the phone. I went back to my laptop and started looking at flights, I quickly realised I didn't know where I was booking a flight to. I'd lost track of where the band would be. I dialled Zayn's number.

"Hi, what's up?" He whispered.

"Is Harry with you? Why are you whispering?" I asked.

"Yeah. Do you want to talk to him? -"

"NO!" I cut him off.

"Hang on" I heard some muffled voices. "Ok. We are waiting to go on stage. What's up?"

"Oh shit! Sorry. Just one thing. Where will you guys be tomorrow?"

"San Diego. Why?" He sounded really confused.

"I'm coming to visit. Don't tell Harry" I smiled.

"Awesome. He's been in a foul mood since he skyped you. Message me details and I'll get Paul to get somebody to pick you up at the airport" He sounded genuinely excited.

"See you soon. Have a great show" I was so excited I hung up without waiting for his reply. I booked a flight for the morning and started to worry about what to pack. This was going to be a long night.

----------

Harry

Earlier that day:

I was sat in my fifth interview of the day. I'd been partnered with Zayn and the questions had become boring. Neither of us were in a very chatty mood. It felt like I was running on autopilot.

"So we have some quick fire questions for you guys. You get ten seconds to answer. So who wants to go first?" The interviewer smiled. Me and Zayn looked at each other. I could tell he was as reluctant as I was.

"I'll go first" I forced a smile.

"Are you a morning or night person?"

"Night."

"What colour is your hairbrush?"

"Black."

"What is the first thing you do when you get up in the morning?"

"Pee."

"On a scale of 1 to 10 how "cool" are you?"

"Probably a one."

"What is the best advantage to being tall?"

"I don't know. Reaching high shelves."

"What compliment do people give you the most?"

"I like your hair."

"What do you think of when I say fruit?"

"Banana."

"Favourite colour?

"Blue."

"If you could have one person here right now who would it be?"

"Jessi" Shit! I immediately covered my mouth with my hand. I couldn't believe I let that slip. The interviewer smiled at me. I frowned. Jessi would kill me.

"You can't put that in your article" Helen said.

"Don't worry I'll just write that he said his girlfriend or boyfriend" She looked over at me for confirmation. I couldn't concentrate on what she'd said though, I could see the cogs in Helen's brain working overtime. She'd recognised the name but I don't think she knew from where yet.

"She's a girl" Zayn grinned.

"Ok. I think we should call it a day" Helen said. Before she ushered the woman out. I got up and followed her out the door but Helen had already vanished.

"FUCK!" I yelled and slammed the door in anger.

"Calm down, Harry. It'll be fine. Jessi is cool. She won't care. It's probably easier if management knows anyway" Zayn put his hand on my shoulder.

"I'm such an idiot. I should have been paying more attention" I sighed.

"Seriously Hazza, it's for the best, at least you won't need to pretend she's not your girlfriend next time she's here"

"It's not just that. I fucked up her internship by posting those photos on twitter and instagram. I was trying to help and instead I got her fucking fired. And now this." I clenched my fists. I was so angry with myself. I wanted to break something.

"Hazza, calm down. Like you said you thought you were doing something good. Don't beat yourself up. Jessi will understand" He patted my shoulder again.

"Will you stop talking about my girlfriend as if you know every fucking thing about her? You don't know what she's thinking!" I snapped.

"Sorry H. I was just trying to help" He walked away from me.

"Zayn, I'm sorry. It's not your fault. I'm being a dick" I yelled after him. I felt bad for taking my anger out on him, it wasn't fair.

"It's fine" He waved his hand to dismiss what happened but still kept walking away.

"Jessi Monroe. I told you I'd find out." Helen smiled as she appeared behind me.

"Well done. You win" I shrugged and threw myself down on the chair.

"This doesn't have to be a war, Harry. I can help you protect her"

"Pff... Don't make me laugh. You'll be ratting us out to the paps the first chance that suits you" I glared at her.

"Look. I can tell you like this girl. My job is to make you look good not ruin your life. If you want this to remain private then I can certainly help you with that until you're ready to make it public. But you can't hide her indefinitely. So what do you say, can we work together?" She smiled.

"Fine." I replied but I still didn't trust her. She disappeared and I went to go find somewhere to mope in peace. I spotted Niall sitting on the sofa. He looked like he was skyping somebody, probably Lorena. I was about to walk right passed him and then I heard him say, "Hi Jessi!"

"Why are you talking to Jessi?" I couldn't stop myself from smiling as I poked my head into the screen. I could hardly see her though, they were in a tiny window.

"She's having dinner with Lori. Hey! Harry give me my laptop back!" Niall tried to grab the laptop back.

"They're tiny. How do you make them bigger?" I complained.

"Well if you give my laptop back I might be able to help, you idiot!" I heard Jessi and Lori laugh before I gave the laptop back to Niall. He clicked some buttons and sat it down. That was much better. Now I could see Jessi's beautiful face.

"Hi Baby! Hi Lori!" I grinned.

"Hi!" They waved. I frowned as Louis and Liam came walking towards us, muttering about something. I wasn't interested. They squished themselves into the picture and Niall finally lost his patience.

"Oh for fuck sake! I'll call you later Lori!" Niall sighed.

----------

I walked to the dressing room I was sharing with Zayn, I was soaked. Our final sound check had become a giant water fight with super soakers. I threw my t-shirt on the floor and felt my phone vibrate in my pocket.

"Hey, I got a new internship, working in a recording studio. I start Monday. I'm so happy."

"Well Done Baby. You'll kill it. I'm so happy for you. I sent you a request on Skype. Missing you. H. x" I replied. I was relieved she'd found a new internship, and she seemed excited about it which made me feel less guilty. I'd enjoyed seeing her and Lori with Niall earlier. It was nice seeing her not just in a photograph. I opened up Skype on my laptop and called her as soon as she'd accepted my request.

"Hi" She waved. She looked pretty. I wished I could touch her.

"Hey! You look pretty" I smiled.

"You too" She smiled. "Why are you wet?"

"Oh practice turned into a massive water fight. How come we haven't Skyped before?"

"Because you said it was a pile of rubbish, it always breaks and you wouldn't use it if I paid you."

"That does sound familiar. Did you explain that I'd get to see your pretty face?" I laughed.

"That must have slipped my mind" She looked so cute when her cheeks turned pink when she blushed.

"See, you should lead with that next time. Massive well done on the new job by the way. Just remember, no running away with one of those hot musicians" I was only partly joking, it was a real fear. My hair fell in my eyes so I brushed it out of the way with my hand.

"I think I've filled my quota of hot musicians" She smiled at me. I wanted to see her so badly.

"Jesus Harry! And you say my conversations with Pez are bad, you two are making me sick" Zayn startled me. I hadn't noticed him come in. He then started making puking noises.

"Shut up, Zayn!" I threw my t-shirt at him to shut him up.

"Hi Honey Bunny!" Jessi yelled. "Hey Love-cup!" Zayn replied and they both laughed.

"Excuse me?" I exclaimed. What the fuck was going on? She only ever called me Harry and he gets honey bunny. Was I in the twilight zone?

"It's what Roger and Jessica Rabbit call each other. We were talking about it earlier, I asked Jessi what to draw and she told me Jessica Rabbit because she's hot and she's always wanted a dress that sparkled like hers" Zayn replied.

"That's it. I'm taking you somewhere else" I picked up the laptop and walked out of the room. I found a quiet corridor and sat down on the floor. I could feel myself pouting.

"I want a cutesy nickname if Zayn gets one!" I was jealous, no doubt about it.

"What do you want your nickname to be?" She smiled. That wasn't how it worked.

"You have to think of it" I half smiled, I was still annoyed.

"Care Bear?"

"No."

"Love Muffin?"

"No."

"Big Papa?"

"Maybe we can revisit that one in the bedroom" I felt a grin spread over my face as I thought about it.

"It's too hard" She whined and I couldn't help but laugh.

"No. Wait, I've got it. The Duke. Because it's basically Royalty and -"

"Because of The Notebook. I love it" I grinned. I wanted to be with her so badly. To hold her in my arms. I brushed my fingers over my lips as I longed to feel hers there and then I suddenly remembered she said her new internship didn't start until next week. I had an idea.

"So am I right in assuming you are free until Monday?" I couldn't wipe the grin from my face.

"Well kinda. I have an assignment to do. That one about the paparazzi. I've been putting it off for weeks, it's due in on Monday. I was going to ask if I could pick your brain? I could use some help." She fidgeted and when she bit her lip, I felt all the blood rush south. Fuck! She looked hot when she did that.

"Well that would be a lot easier to do in person. Why don't you join us on tour for the weekend?" I couldn't wait to see her, to touch her. To feel her skin beneath my fingers.

"I'd love to but I really have to get this done and besides pretending we weren't together was pretty horrible on Saturday" My smile faded and my heart sank. Maybe today was destined to be a shitty day after all.

"Oh okay" I paused. "And we don't have to pretend we're not dating around management anymore, I fucked that up earlier. Helen knows" I confessed, flatly. I tried to hide my disappointment. Maybe I was being a little selfish, expecting her to drop everything to come see me? I mean I couldn't make those kind of gestures for her, my schedule was decided a year in advance.

"How'd she find out?" Jessi asked. I was relieved she didn't sound mad or disappointed.

"We were doing an interview and I said your name as one of the answers and Helen put two and two together. And with the help of Niall, she confirmed you were Lori's friend and then somebody else told her about your photos so now she has your full name. She's probably learning everything about you as we speak. I'm sorry" I sighed.

"It's okay. It was going to happen sooner or later" She smiled. "What was the question?" 

"Huh?" I tried to pull myself from the pity party in my head. Why didn't she want to see me?

"The question? The one you answered with my name?" She smirked at me. And when I thought about it I became more depressed. 

"I should go" I reached to close the laptop. I had to get off this call, my mind spiralled. Maybe, she just didn't like me as much as I liked her?

"Wait!" She yelled. I paused. There was a faint spark of hope that she'd changed her mind.

"I more than like you, Styles" She smiled. I couldn't help but sigh. It felt like a punch to my gut. I was sick of saying I more than like you. I loved her and I wasn't in the mood for hiding it anymore.

"I love you Jessi. Just because it scares you doesn't mean it's not true" I slammed the laptop lid closed. I pushed myself up off the floor and stormed into the dressing room, banged my laptop down on the table and threw myself down on the couch.

"You okay, Hazza?" Zayn sounded concerned.

"Please just leave me alone" I whispered as I turned to face the back of the sofa. I felt something land beside my arm, Zayn must have thrown it at me and then I heard the door close. I looked down and saw Bob, Jessi's bear. I picked it up and tucked it under my nose, the smell of her perfume had faded. I wasn't surprised, I'd been sleeping with it every night. I closed my eyes, and my heart ached as it seemed like her perfume wasn't the only thing that was fading.