Read on to understand a certain WindClan tom's motivations behind his actions of love, as well as betrayal, selfishness, and pure evil...

Breezepelt's POV

Chapter 1

I nearly let out a hiss, gritting my teeth as a cold breeze brushed through the air, seeming to encapsulate every single piece of fur on my body as it also made the brown leaves above shiver and rub against each other.

I stood up from where I stood in WindClan's training hollow as I shook out my fur. Great StarClan, I thought as I scanned my eyes around the clearing, where Crowfeather, my father, as well as my Clanmate, Heathertail, and Boulderpaw and Furzepaw - our two apprentices - had settled come twilight. Although no one had directly said anything, I could tell that they were just as cold as I already was. We're nearly freezing our tails off, and it feels as if leaf-fall has only just arrived!

But I tried to push away my discomfort, trying to focus on Heathertail's sweet, yet assertive and commanding voice as she instructed our two apprentices on the proper hunting crouch. "Now, when you're down in a hunting crouch, remember," she went on as she gently pushed Furzepaw's shoulders down, "It's just as important to not be heard as it is not to be seen."

I shook out my fur a second time before stepping forward. "Exactly," I then meowed, picking off of the light brown tabby she-cat's words. I then did as Heathertail had done, putting my paws on Boulderpaw's shoulders to adjust his position. "You don't want your tail to brush against the ground, so make sure you keep it up high!"

I then felt myself having to suppress yet another hiss, but not from the cold this time.

Almost right after I had finished speaking, Crowfeather - who had come simply just to oversee our hunting session - let out a disapproving grunt. And with each pawstep he took towards me and Boulderpaw, I felt what seemed like a forest fire spread deeper and deeper throughout my entire pelt.

And his first words were practically a fog. "Well, not exactly," he muttered, stopping beside Boulderpaw as he began to raise one of his paws.

It never ends, does it? It never ends!

That's all that it took for the fire to spill out from my jaws, and I whipped myself around to meet Crowfeather's surprised, yet annoyed gaze. "What are you doing?" I hissed.

Crowfeather didn't move, but his blue eyes flashed with alarm for a moment. "Keep your fur on! I'm just trying to-"

I let out another hiss, batting his paw away from where he'd tried to lift it once again. "You're not trying to do anything," I then muttered through gritted teeth.

Crowfeather then let out an exasperated sigh as he rolled his eyes. "Breezepelt, I'm just trying to correct what you said, and I-"

I didn't let my father finish. Whatever he says won't matter anyway. It never goes in my favor. "And what gives you the right to do that?"

My ears then flicked with alarm as I recognized the sigh of Heathertail come from behind me, and I turned my head just slightly to see her tail anxiously twitching back and forth. "Breezepelt..."

But I ignored the she-cat, turning back to Crowfeather as he spoke again. I nearly took I step back as I realized that his muzzle was just about a mouse-length from mine. "I'm sorry," he then barked at me. "Who's been in this Clan longer?"

I then took a step back as he took a step towards me. "That doesn't matter!" I murmured before taking a step back towards him. "Back off, Crowfeather!"

This time, Crowfeather didn't return the gesture, and only stared back at me with dark, angry eyes. "What is wrong with you? You're making a spectacle for no reason."

"Foxdung!" I then growled back at him. "I know what I'm talking about!"

I then took another step back, slightly startled as Crowfeather leaped forward, now standing in between me and Boulderpaw as he continued to give me a hard stare. "Clearly, you don't," he then muttered sharply. "Now let me give Boulderpaw the right direction so that he doesn't scare away every piece of prey in the forest."

Without even waiting for my reply, he finally broke my gaze and turned back to Boulderpaw. "Yes, you must make sure that your tail doesn't brush against anything," he then meowed, his voice much softer - softer than he'd ever spoken to me in my life. "But you also don't want any creatures to see your tail sticking up in the air as you're sneaking towards them. So you have..."

The more that Crowfeather spoke, the more that his words then became a blur as my resentment and anger nearly boiled over once again. I felt my eyes narrow as I stared back at the tom that - for some StarClan-forsaken reason - was my kin. But that doesn't matter; I might as well be a rogue in the forest to that tom, because I receive none of his respect.

I then found myself having to stand up, and I let my claws slide out as I continued to reflect on how the dark gray tom had treated me as far back as when I was a kit. It's like he waits every moment of the day, eager to correct me or tell me what I'm doing wrong... it's not fair at all.

I then suppressed yet another hiss as I let my head fall to the ground, trying to force myself to shake off my irritation. What do I even need his attention? It's never positive. I tried to rationalize. Yes, he's my father, but-

"Breezepelt!"

My frustration and exasperation then rose as quickly as prey runs from its predator as Crowfeather's sharp voice broke through my thoughts. "What, for StarClan's sake!?" I barked back at him, my fur bristling.

The sight of Crowfeather not being phased by my demeanor or tone was almost just as enraging. "I'm done," he meowed, lashing his tail to my apprentice. "You can further instruct Boulderpaw."

I took a deep breath as I licked one of my paws and ran it over my ear. "Are you sure that you wouldn't rather just take over as his mentor?" I muttered bitterly. "You're clearly more qualified."

Crowfeather simply sighed and rolled his eyes once again. "Stop acting like a kit, Breezepelt," he breathed as he then gestured towards the sky with his tail. "We're losing daylight."

I finally gave in, letting out a sigh as well. "Fine," I muttered, finally turning away from the dark gray tom. I briefly flashed an apologetic look to Heathertail, who was now on my other side. I actually finally let my fur lie completely flat as gave me a quick look of sympathy.

It was enough to motivate me to continue the training session. "How about we let Boulderpaw and Furzepaw practice for a little while?"

Heathertail immediately gave me a gentle nod. "That's fine!" she agreed before turning to our apprentices. "Alright, you two - we're going to have you both practice hunting for a little while so that you can nail that hunting crouch."

I was able to feel the smallest twinge of satisfaction as the two younger cats immediately stood up, clearly eager to hear Heathertail's directions. "Stay within the area," she went on, "and if no prey turns up, just practice that sneaking!"

I then watched as Furzepaw and Boulderpaw both nodded excitedly, the discomfort they had probably felt from the quarrel they had just witnessed practically disintegrating, before dispersing and padding lightly through the area - their muzzles in the air.

I had only been observing them for a few moments, preparing to give them any sort of direction, when I heard footsteps padding in my direction.

For a moment, I hoped that it was Crowfeather, walking up to apologize to me. However, I knew that that was an absolutely ridiculous thought. Of course, my father was on the other side of the hollow, his eyes narrowed as he watched the two apprentices.

I quickly realized that it was actually Heathertail making her way towards me, her beautiful blue eyes full of concern.

I then felt my ears grow hot as she sat down next to me and leaned her muzzle into my ear. "Are you okay?" she then whispered.

For some reason, it was my first instinct to immediately pull away. "Yes, I'm fine," I muttered, now trying my best to ignore her worried gaze burning into my pelt. "Don't worry about it."

Along with my ears, my entire body then seemed to grow hot, wiping away any of the chills I had felt from the cold weather before, as it finally set in just how embarrassed I was that Heathertail had witnessed the quarrel between Crowfeather and me. And for some reason, that fact that she is worried about it feels worse...

But honestly, any cat in WindClan probably applies to this situation at this point...

Before the tabby she-cat could say anything else, I stood up, beginning to pad towards the shrubs that I'd watched my apprentice disappear through as I continued to force down my anger and humiliation. "Listen, I'm going to go watch Boulderpaw," I meowed to her, not looking back as I left her alone. "I'll see you later."

~>~>~>~>~>~>~>~

Unfortunately, by the time that the sun had nearly set, neither Boulderpaw nor Furzepaw had had any luck finding anything even resembling prey. Leaf-bare will be here any day now... I should have expected this.

When Heathertail, Crowfeather and I made this unnerving, but not very surprising revelation, we had decided to go a bit deeper into our territory to see if we could find anything at all.

However, StarClan must've decided that cats just don't need to eat. Hm, they always have been neglectful...

But I shook away my bitter thoughts once I heard Heathertail speak, her blue eyes glowing in the evening light as she watched Furzepaw and Boulderpaw hopelessly sniff out any potential prey nearby. "Goodness, even when you two nail the hunting crouch, none of the prey shows!"

Beside her, Crowfeather simply sniffed as he shook his head slowly. "It's been a long time since a hunting trip has been this hard..."

I then flicked my ears, my fur beginning to prickle with excitement as I came up with a possible solution. "Well, of course it'll be hard finding any prey when we're all together," I observed. "How about we split up and hunt in different parts of the territory?"

I already felt my lips beginning to curl back into a snarl as I heard the familiar skeptical grunt come from Crowfeather's direction. I didn't even look at him when he spoke. "I'm not sure if that's a good idea," he replied. "Especially when moonhigh is fast approaching."

I forced myself to stay in my place, however, I was almost too exasperated and exhausted to show it. I'd braced myself for the criticism as soon as I'd spoken. "Of course you disagree," I muttered, almost too quietly for anyone to hear.

But of course, Crowfeather's ears were open. "Breezepelt, for StarClan's sake!" he barked, giving a single irritated lash of his tail.

"You're always ready to bite back, aren't you?" I went on, my voice quickly rising up to a growl as I turned to face Crowfeather. "I could say that WindClan is the best Clan on earth, and you'd disagree with me just because you can!"

"What a load of foxdung!" Crowfeather hissed back. "How do you think I'd benefit from that, Breezepelt?"

Crowfeather could legitimately try to explain himself, or do something as little as make excuses - at this point, he angered me either way. "I don't know!" I growled, taking a step towards him. "For some reason you love to do nothing but put me down, so I don't expect anything less from you!"

Crowfeather also took a step closer to me. We were practically muzzle to muzzle once again. Our eyes might as well have been a single blazing ball of fire. "Well, when you say or do something wrong, I'm going to let you know that I see that!"

"Which, to you, is constantly!"

I then was completely caught off guard when Heathertail herself let out a hiss, leaping forward so that she stood in between the two of us. "Come on, you two!" sounding more angry than I probably had ever heard her. "It's only getting darker while you bicker like this."

I then couldn't help but let out another hiss, turning away from both of them as the she-cat went on. "While I agree that hunting in the dark is harder, and a bit more risky, I definitely don't want to return to camp empty-pawed, if we can."

I then raised my head slightly, feeling the smallest bit of warmth and relief at the fact that the she-cat agreed with me. "What do you think, Crowfeather?" I then heard her meow.

Even though my father was now completely behind me, I could practically feel his blue gaze still burning into me.

For a moment, he didn't speak, and only let out a long sigh. "Fine," he finally murmured after a few heartbeats.

I couldn't help but let out a quiet, contemptuous hiss as I turned back around to face my Clanmates. Of course Heathertail was the one to get through to him, and not me.

Nevertheless, I listened as the older tom gave directions. "Heathertail and Furzepaw can come with me, and Breezepelt and Boulderpaw - you two can go together."

I then watched as he made his way towards one side of the clearing, beckoning to Heathertail and Furzepaw with his tail. "Let's meet at this same spot just before moonhigh."

And my eagerness to have a moment away from Crowfeather began to rise as his tail finally disappeared through some bushes. "Behave yourselves."

Once my father, along with Heathertail and Furzepaw, where completely out of sight, I turned away, mouthed Crowfeather's latest words silently, before hissing once again and giving a lash of my tail. The fact that he trusts me with my apprentice by myself is shocking.

I then snorted as I lashed my tail towards Boulderpaw, beckoning him to follow me as my gut and heart for some reason led me towards the stream nearby. Even though that's exactly what I'm supposed to do...

Chapter 2

By the time that the sun had completely disappeared behind the moor hills, not even one piece of prey had made any appearance, let alone make a noise or trail any sort of scent.

Boulderpaw and I had been walking along the stream for a while now, and I had to admit, something as little as the calm of the night was incredibly frustrating.

For a moment, I wondered if we all should have even split up - I hated the thought of coming back to the rest of the group with nothing. However, I also refused to comply with what Crowfeather had originally argued.

So, I had decided to give Boulderpaw a more thorough hunting lesson, hoping that if we waited things out a bit longer, he'd finally be able to practice on real prey. "That's it..." I murmured, watching as the young tom went down into his hunting crouch once again.

I then padded up to him, going down into a crouch as well in order to demonstrate. "Make sure that your belly is as low to the ground as it can be," I went on, before proceeding to let out a snort. "And your tail..."

I then rolled my eyes as I watched Boulderpaw's green eyes light up. "Oh, yeah!" I then watched as the tom lowered his tail to where it was just about a mouse-length off of the ground - just as Crowfeather had supposedly taught him. "Like that, right?"

I held back another hiss, speaking my next words through gritted teeth. "Yes, that's right." Great StarClan, it literally feels like a physical wound whenever I have to-

My head then shot up, and I flicked my ears as a warm, delicious, and familiar scent began to flood through my nose.

Rabbit. For a moment, it almost felt as if I'd never get to smell it again.

I slowly rose back up to my paws, raising my tail to silence my apprentice. "Hey, Boulderpaw," I whispered as quietly as possible as I lifted my muzzle up in the air. "Do you smell that?"

I only slightly turned my head so that I could see Boulderpaw's eyes widen. "Whoa!" he whispered even more quietly than I had. Then, after he had scanned the area for just a few heartbeats, I raised my eyebrows as he then gave a single sharp nod straight ahead. "There it is!"

I followed the gray tom's gaze, and I immediately spotted the plump brown creature just a few pawsteps away. No way... I thought as my fur seemed to rise with excitement. There's no way Crowfeather would be able to criticize my apprentice catching something like that...

I let out a quiet, satisfied grunt as I flicked my tail forward. "You're right, Boulderpaw," I replied quietly after a few heartbeats. "Go for it."

I then took the quietest possible pawstep backwards that I could as Boulderpaw crouched down - correctly - and began to sneak towards the creature just barely out of his reach.

I almost felt just as excited as if I were the one about to make the catch - this might have been one of the biggest rabbits I had ever seen, and it had no idea we were there.

I actually let my claws sink into the ground as I realized that Boulderpaw was about to make his leap towards the rabbit. He was likely just a heartbeat away from sinking his claws into the creature.

So, I couldn't suppress a hiss when the sound of a rustle came from across the stream, causing the rabbit to run off into the darkness.

Boulderpaw let out an annoyed grunt. "Aw, no!" he meowed as he slashed at a leaf on the ground. "I was so close! What was that?"

To be honest, I barely heard my apprentice's words, and I found myself staring intently across the stream - my ears pricking as the rustling sounds continued on ThunderClan's side of the border.

The footsteps were too light to be a piece of prey; it was a cat for sure. But who else would be out at this time? I wondered. I hope they know that they probably just cost a few cats in WindClan their dinner.

A warm rush then ran through me, and I felt my eyes narrowing as I continued to ponder the situation. How many cats in ThunderClan wander alone at this time?

Without even thinking, my paws began to make their way closer to the stream that was just barely in sight. "I'm not too sure, Boulderpaw..." I murmured, finally replying to the young tom's question.

I then found my pace and my heartbeat simultaneously quickening. "But I'm going to check."

I then immediately heard lighter, quicker footsteps come from behind me. "Oh, can I come with you?" Boulderpaw called out from behind me.

I then abruptly stopped in my tracks, hesitating for just a moment before finally looking back towards Boulderpaw. "Um... no, Boulderpaw," I replied to him, trying to sound as certain and authoritative as I could. "I think it's best that you stay here."

My apprentice then sat down, his eyes washing over with worry as he tilted his head to the side. "Are you sure? I don't know if Crowfeather would like us splitting up even more-"

For a moment, the excitement of my travel to the stream completely went away and was replaced with immense indignation as I whipped back around to face Boulderpaw. "To foxdung with what Crowfeather says!"

I then almost immediately turned back around, continuing towards the stream without waiting for Boulderpaw's reply. "I'll be right back. Don't move."

All I had to do was slither through some bushes before the stream fully came into sight. The change of seasons and the small leaf-fall breeze caused it to be quite active, but the sound of the flowing water was practically drowned out by the sounds of the crickets and other very small creatures that surrounded the area.

And just as I had suspected, I caught wind of a fresh ThunderClan scent just heartbeats later.

I stepped to the side and crouched down behind some shrubs, listening as the rustles were becoming even louder, and even closer.

But I rose back up almost instantly, as I immediately recognized the scent, the pace of the movements and the footsteps...

And the golden brown tabby pelt that eventually emerged through some brambles on the other side of the stream confirmed the suspicions that I'd had since I first heard those rustles. "Goldenshine?" I exclaimed, fully stepping out into the open.

I actually felt a small twinge of pride as I watched the she-cat's head immediately rise at the sound of her name. Her eyes widened with surprised as she then met my gaze.

I stared right back at her big, gray eyes, a chill running down my spine. This feels so strangely familiar... I thought in amazement as the cat I had once called my mate - the she-cat that I'd had a kit with and would have once given up everything for - stood in her place on the other side of the stream. I can't even begin to put it in to words...

And luckily, I didn't have to as Goldenshine herself ran up to her side of the stream, her eyes still wide with shock. "Breezepelt?" she then meowed, her voice full of its usual enthusiasm. "Hey!"

I found myself running up to my side of the stream to meet her, for some reason, feeling so much excitement at the sight of the she-cat - this being only the second time I'd seen her since we parted ways - the first being at a Gathering just a couple of moons ago, where we luckily had been able to establish what I understood to be a friendship.

So, I actually found that I had no problem interacting with Goldenshine, and I found that was very, very happy to see her. "Hey!" I called back. "Fancy meeting you here."

"Just a bit!" Goldenshine purred as her tail began to lash back and forth. "How are you doing?"

There had been a time where I shared absolutely everything with this cat, and I saw no reason to stop at this point. "Well... let's just say that you're a breath of fresh air right now." Then, after the two of us purred with amusement, I asked, "How are things going for you?"

I couldn't hold back another purr as Goldenshine shrugged, letting out an exasperated sigh. "Things are going!" she exclaimed.

I then raised my eyebrows as I watched her tilt her head to the side, her eyes slowly beginning to narrow down into slits as they glittered with mischief. "Funny enough - I think I've asked you this before... What in the name of StarClan are you doing out here, anyway?"

I shrugged back at Goldenshine, now having to try my hardest to suppress another purr. But I still gave her a smirk as I gave my reply. "...Hunting?" I murmured.

Goldenshine simply raised a single eyebrow as she returned my smirk. "By yourself?"

"Well, this time... no," I replied, my voice full of laughter.

I then flicked my ears, letting out an amused grunt as I was able to come to a conclusion about something - the thing that had brought me over here in the first place. "I was out with Boulderpaw looking for prey, when this nuisance of a cat scared away the rabbit he was about to catch!"

I then held back laughter once again as Goldenshine's eyes slowly widened. "No..." she breathed. "Are you joking?"

"Not really."

I then slightly regretted my teasing as Goldenshine stood up, her gray eyes washing over with genuine disappointment. "Aw, shoot!" she meowed. "Ugh, I knew that I was getting a little too close to the border... and being a little too loud."

She then shook her head as she let out a sigh, taking a step closer to the stream. "I'm sorry, Breezepelt. I probably just cost a few cats in WindClan their dinner!"

I stood up as well, flashing the she-cat a reassuring look. Huh... seeing her upset really makes me think that me being upset over a lost rabbit really isn't worth it. "Really, don't worry about it," I meowed to her.

Then, as our gazes met once again, I felt a surprisingly strong rush of warm run through my pelt. "Honestly... it's really great to see you again," I then murmured. "So, what in the name of StarClan are you doing out here by yourself?"

Goldenshine let out another purr as she began to shuffle her paws from side to side. "Well, funny enough, I was also hunting, but with Dustystorm!"

I then felt myself tense up.

I then watched as Goldenshine began to shuffle her paws from side to side, having to keep my own fur lying flat. "If you remember him..." she then nearly whispered. "And his deal..."

After a couple of heartbeats, I forced myself to answer. "Oh, I definitely do..." I replied, trying to sound at least somewhat enthusiastic.

I then couldn't help but ask her the question that had been pressing in my mind since the last time I saw her - this "Dustystorm" name being one I had heard come out of Goldenshine's mouth before, and not in a context I particularly liked. "Um... so... what is the deal between the two of you, if I can ask?"

As Goldenshine's eyes immediately lit up, I actually felt my heart sink a little as I could easily tell what she was going to say to me. "Well, I don't think that you'll be too surprised, however..." she answered, a purr clearly rising in her throat. "We officially became mates just a couple of days ago."

Although my former mate was completely right in that I should have expected it, I simultaneously felt as bowled over as I would be if Crowfeather walked up to me, gave me a lick on the cheek, and told me that he felt blessed to be able to call me his son.

I honestly don't know what I'm shocked about... I realized as this news continued to process - news that for some reason made me feel as if I was swimming in a pool of bramble thorns. My mouse-brained head actually encouraged this relationship to some extent!

I still remembered very clearly the conversation that had happened between Goldenshine and me the last time that we had spoken to each other. I actually had very clearly noticed this... Dustystorm's feelings for Goldenshine. I mean, I'm no genius - any cat would think it was obvious.

And, for some reason, I had pointed this out to her. I told her that I saw potential for them to be mates! I thought to myself in amazement. Why did I do that?

I then let out a sigh, giving a single flick of my ear as I quickly could answer my own question. I suppose I had it in my mind that they probably sparked a connection that wouldn't go anywhere... Wow, was I wrong.

I then had to keep myself from shifting around uncomfortably - the thought of Goldenshine being with another tom being a weird, weird thought. "Wow, I... wow," I finally forced out, hardly being able to find any words to say in reply. "Goldenshine, that's-"

Almost thankfully, the she-cat cut me off. "I know!" she then exclaimed. "I mean, he's absolutely wonderful. And you were right... there was definitely something there."

I then couldn't help but close my eyes, but I kept my ears open as Goldenshine spoke her next words. "Speaking of..." she went on somewhat hesitantly. "...Can I ask you about Heathertail?"

My eyes flew back open. "Me and Heathertail?"

Goldenshine eagerly nodded back at me. "Yeah!" she then squealed, giving me a wink that I couldn't help but purr at. "You're not the only one who can sense a spark. I've noticed that you two have been spending a lot of time together lately."

For a moment, I could do nothing but stare back at the golden brown tabby, racking my brain for what to say in reply. "Oh... yeah!" I eventually meowed. "Yes, she's great. We're training our apprentices together, and it's..."

I paused for a moment before going on. "It's a lot of fun. She's a great she-cat, really."

I then closed my eyes once again, taking a deep, uncomfortable breath. I mean, it's not exactly a lie... "Um... but what about Swiftpaw?" I then pressed, desperate to change the subject.

I then shook my head quickly, holding back a hiss. So desperate that you forgot how to speak correctly. "How is Swiftpaw?"

I then flicked my ears in surprise as I looked back up at Goldenshine to see that she suddenly seemed to look equally as uncomfortable as I had felt hearing about Dustystorm, or talking about Heathertail. "Well, he's... fine. He's just fine!" she answered after a moment. "He definitely brings something new every day."

Hm... I thought as I felt my eyes narrowing once again. That's a very different answer than she gave me the last time that we talked.

But however much Goldenshine's words peeked my curiosity, I simply waited for her to go on. "I..." she then began, her head beginning to shake slowly as she met my gaze. "I can still hardly believe that you've never met him."

For a moment, those words almost felt as if a cat had clawed me across the face. "Me too," I nearly whispered - a brief image of Swiftpaw flashing through my mind, the last time I had seen him being the night he was born. The night that I also lost my three other kits...

My eyes screwed shut as I felt a sharp pang of regret. That loss was bad enough, and then I wasn't able to see the one kit that lived. I really can't believe that I've never met him, I then thought. My own son...

I then opened my eyes once again just in time to catch Goldenshine's gaze wiping over with immense excitement. "Hey... but now that he's an apprentice, you might get to see him at a Gathering, maybe?"

For some reason, that thought gave me a strong spark of hope... not only would I get to finally meet Swiftpaw, my son, but getting to see the son that we had together... that we'd always have together...

I then held back a bitter grunt. I wonder if Dustystorm and Goldenshine will ever have kits?

I then quickly pushed that thought away. I don't want to think that far. "I'd really like that," I finally replied to Goldenshine, giving her a genuinely warm look.

And Goldenshine returned it, causing the fur along my back to tingle for a heartbeat. "Great StarClan, me too. I-"

"Hey, Goldenshine!"

I then stood up, my fur beginning to bristle at the new voice that called out from the ThunderClan side of the stream. I looked out into the forest briefly before looking back at Goldenshine, who, for some StarClan-forsaken reason didn't seem to feel even a twinge of panic.

In fact, all she did was glance back at me just briefly. "Hold on," she whispered before turning around to face the forest. "Yeah!?"

And once the voice called out again, I couldn't help but let out a low hiss as I realized that this was likely Dustystorm speaking. "Where did you run off to?" he called out again. "I caught a huge squirrel - you have to see it!"

Goldenshine then purred with amusement, flashing me a look full of humor before looking back towards the forest once again. "Oh, I believe you! I'll be right there!"

She then finally turned back to me, her gray eyes still glittering as she shook her head slowly. "Great StarClan..." she murmured, her face then washing over with warmth and sadness at the same time. "Well, it looks like I have to go - Dustystorm most definitely will want to brag about his squirrel as soon as possible!"

I hesitantly stood up, the regret welling up in my heart almost seeming to physically prevent me from doing so. "Ah, then I'll make myself scarce," I meowed, lowering my voice just slightly as I began to back away. "You probably don't want Dustystorm knowing that I was here."

I then furrowed my eyebrows as I watched Goldenshine actually flick her ears in surprise, as if I had just told her that a bird was laying eggs on her head. "Oh, don't worry about that, Breezepelt!" she reassured me, to my complete bewilderment. "He... he knows what we had - I told him about it."

What!?

That news actually made my stomach twist, and I couldn't help but feel a pang of betrayal at the thought of the she-cat sharing our secret with someone - let alone someone so new to the Clans. "Really?" was all that I was able to force out.

"I hope that's okay... I..." she then hesitated slightly. "I couldn't stand to keep any more secrets after..."

She then closed her eyes for a moment, letting out what sounded like a frustrated sigh. "Well, you know," she eventually continued. "And I am definitely going to tell him that I ran into you, so there's no need to panic."

I found that I couldn't reply immediately as I let the reality of this situation settle. Dustystorm knew about what we had... I then had to hold back a snort. And yet he still pursed you? Those kittypet minds are all bent out of shape.

But I then realized that I couldn't let my jealous, bitter thoughts completely take over. Honestly, it was admirable that Goldenshine felt that she could and should be more open with her second mate. She... she must've learned her lesson after all of the secrets that the two of us once carried together.

I then screwed my eyes shut again, forcing myself to ignore the strong, almost unbearable pang of regret that I suddenly felt as I looked back at my former mate. Unfortunately, I definitely can't say the same...

I then let my eyes open once again, meeting Goldenshine's  gaze once again. "Okay, then. No problem," I finally murmured, taking a look back towards WindClan territory before giving a final nod to Goldenshine, pushing down all of my negative feeling that were threatening to rise up. "I'll see you soon."

Goldenshine returned the nod, her gray eyes reflecting beautifully against the moonlight. "Goodnight, Breezepelt," the she-cat whispered.

Then, without waiting for a reply, she turned around and pelted into the forest, disappearing from my sight within heartbeats.

Goodbye, Goldenshine.

And for a moment, I found myself just staring off at the place that she had vanished, having to take the time to process every single feeling that had sparked within me just through this brief encounter with my former mate - angry, regretful, jealous, happy and sad ones... what I thought was initially such a lighthearted conversation had sparked so much within me - and I hated all of it.

But eventually, I let out a long, heavy sigh before finally standing up and beginning to pad deeper into my territory. Geez... at first it seemed that Goldenshine was a distraction from this nuisance of a patrol that I'm on... I thought as I crawled through the same shrubs that I'd traveled through before. But now it seems that this patrol is going to be a distraction from Goldenshine.

However, I'd just barely made it through the shrubs when I came to another abrupt halt - coming face to face with every single cat on my patrol, just standing there and waiting for me.

Well, nevermind.

I could just barely see Heathertail, Furzepaw, and Boulderpaw's fearful expressions out of the corner of my eye, but the only thing that I could focus on was Crowfeather - his blue eyes blazing like a wildfire.

The sight made my stomach twist, but there was no way I was going to let him know that. "Don't even bother," I muttered to my father as I brushed past all four of the cats. "I don't need to explain myself to you."

Crowfeather let out an angry hiss behind me. "That is exactly what you're supposed to do, and that's exactly what you're going to do!"

I then heard his fast pawsteps following behind me. "What were you thinking? Heathertail, Furzepaw and I came back to the hollow, and you and Boulderpaw weren't there, and we come to this clearing to find Boulderpaw by himself in the middle of the night!"

I then hissed, taking a step back as Crowfeather leaped forward, intercepting me as he let his infuriated gaze burn into mine. "What were you thinking?"

I forced myself to stand my ground. "Why are you making such a big deal out of this? All I did was check on a noise that I heard at the border!"

To Crowfeather, that didn't help my case at all. "And you couldn't at least bring Boulderpaw with you?"

I began to reply sharply. "I..."

But I quickly trailed off, realizing that I had no reasonable way to explain why I couldn't take my apprentice with me. "I... no."

"Why not?"

I then closed my eyes for a moment, still having no idea how to explain myself without the older tom getting suspicious. "I..."

But unfortunately, I probably had picked the easiest way.

The dark gray tom narrowed his eyes back at me. "Did you find the thing that was making noise?"

"Yes..." I answered, nodding quickly. "It. it was just a dumb shrew on the other side of the stream."

I then couldn't help but finally take a pawstep back as Crowfeather didn't speak for what felt like an entire lifetime. Instead, he simply stared at me - for some reason, a wary, yet knowing gleam in his eye. "You know what? I don't to hear any more."

I then raised my eyebrows as he quickly whipped himself around, beginning to pad in the direction of the WindClan camp. "You're lucky that I don't tell Onestar about this," he called back, beckoning everyone to follow him with his tail. "Let's get back to camp."

I straightened up, ignoring Heathertail's worried gaze once again as she and the other apprentices began to follow my father back to camp. And once I actually began to follow as well, I trailed back as far as I could without Crowfeather thinking that I had run off.

But at the same time, I want to stay as far from that mange-pelt as possible, I thought angrily. Great StarClan, I wonder if any other cat deals with a father like this - one that makes you feel like you can never do anything right. I then let out a huff. I hope that I wouldn't be like that as a father.

I then raised my eyebrows, my tail raising in the air. Well, I am one, I suppose... I then realized, another image of Swiftpaw as a newborn kit flashing in my mind, followed by images of what I imagined as life with a kit - playing outside in camp, teaching him fighting moves... playing mossball... Hm... Crowfeather would give me a hard time about fatherhood too if he knew about it...

I then blinked a few times, lifting my head to the sky as a genuinely contemplated a certain question. I wonder what I would be like as a father? I asked myself before letting out a snort. All I know, is that I have a father that doesn't respect or care for me at all. Who knows? I'd maybe be exactly the same.

I then stopped in my tracks completely, not caring if I trailed behind the group anymore. But who cares about that? I then pressed to myself.

I then let out a hiss, batting at a pile of leaves just in front of me. Who cares about any of it?

I then sighed, lifting my head slowly so that I could look up at the sky, which happened to not be filled with too many stars that night. I have several, several other cats that constantly give me the approval that I deserve. That's all that I should care about.

I then felt a new rush of adrenaline run through my pelt as I began to walk again. Do I care that I don't know my son? Do I care that Goldenshine has a new mate? Maybe a little. There was even a small part of me that held out for us possibly being together again.

I began to walk even faster. But I have to give up on that now - it's not worth it anymore.

I then slowed down in my travels once again. But what about Heathertail?

I had to admit, Goldenshine was slightly onto something when she had mentioned the light brown tabby she-cat to me - she was a beautiful, kind, and very noble warrior that stood by my side no matter what...

I then shook my head quickly. But she shouldn't be my priority right now, I then told myself.

I then looked up to the sky once again. I've joined the Dark Forest, and that should take first.

At this thought, I quickened my pace again. And when it comes to Goldenshine... I need to start seeing her as an enemy. The time that we shared is long over, and her moving on is just a blatant reminder of that.

That thought hurt me slightly, because yes, I cared about Goldenshine, and probably always would, but I had to accept that things would, and couldn't be the same anymore.

I then stopped in my tracks yet again. It will be hard to do at first, but I can't crack down with her anymore. It has never done anything good for me.

I then narrowed my eyes as I looked back towards ThunderClan territory, a shiver running down my spine as I recalled the encounter I'd had many moons ago with the cat that, at the time, had been greatly feared by everyone before his death. Promises and deals were made, that were eventually broken... because of me and my stupid heart... I recalled.

Then, like a wave of water running over pebbles and washing them away, my guilt and regret was washed away and replaced with deep determination. Among everyone else, I can't crack down with Goldenshine anymore, I repeated to myself. I already have once, and I won't make that mistake again.