THE CAMP ENDED WITHOUT much trouble, but Alina still weighed heavily on Mateo's mind. Even Sahar and Jay's new relationship couldn't get his mind off it, though Jay tried to help. Still, it was hard to focus on anything else when Alina didn't come to school for a whole week after, especially when no one seemed to approve of his idea to visit her. Even Jay had told Mateo to wait to talk to Alina, if only because showing up at her house would not make her react well at all. When Mateo protested Jay had just shaken his head, expression a bit off.

"I know you don't want her to stay any closer to people who hurt her," he said," but you can't do anything for now without making the whole situation worse. Trust me, I know how complicated this is."

"Did something happen, Jay?" Mateo frowned.

"It doesn't matter at the moment," Jay said, gaze focused on something far away, snapping back to Mateo's a second later," I just need you to give me a peptalk before I have to go to my house and get all my stuff."

It was a week after the end of the camp now and he had discussed his new living arrangements with the principal. He would be eighteen soon, but until then he could just live freely with the principal and after that, when he was older, he could choose to officially become his son. Clarkson had said he didn't want to pressure him into something so permanent until he was absolutely sure, so they would settle for the waiting period for now.

Getting Jay's things was more complicated than it seemed though. The principal had planned to go alone at first, but Jay had been vehemently against that. The fear he had towards his father was one Mateo was becoming more and more suspicious of and these kinds of remarks Jay made didn't help with that. Still, he didn't want to intrude, not when Jay didn't seem ready to talk about it yet. What was more important now was that he was safe and happy. He seemed to be exactly that now, in his cozy, new room in the principal's home, one filled with colorful furniture he and Sahar had picked.

The principal would pick them up soon and bring them to Jay's house, where his friend was going to go inside alone. Despite Mateo's reluctance, Jay hadn't been willing to budge on that, but he was happy enough he could come with to the entrance. Besides, being alone in the car with the principal probably would be the perfect time to discuss Alina. Clarkson would know what to do, that Mateo was sure of.

Jay glanced down at his phone when it went off, an amused frown on his face.

"Sahar got more scented candles for me," he said," my room smells like the inside of a cupcake."

"Nothing wrong with that," Mateo said.

"I would rather set all those clothes reeking of dirty money on fire," Jay said," but Sahar convinced me to donate them all."

"I don't think the scent of fabric burning would be soothing," Mateo said.

"That's because you don't think," Jay said.

Mateo's lips parted, but before he could even start his speech about how much Jay had broken his heart his friend already stood up. His expression had become something darker, the one he had worn that same night they had first started bonding, where everything had fallen apart. Now it seemed like life was finally going well for the both of them, in a way which gave Mateo hope for the future.

"Let's go," he said, slapping Jay amicably on the back," take every cent you can get from that fucker."

- ☾-

JAY NEVER WOULD HAVE believed it if someone had told him at the beginning of this year that he would be singing songs at the top of his lungs with the principal of St Joseph and Mateo Martinez. Now however he couldn't imagine life without the two of them. A glance at his phone background, a selfie Sahar had made of the two of them, made a smile tug at his lips, one which gave him more courage than anything else.

He could do it. Just walk in the house, take his things and leave. After that, he would never have to come back again. The principal pulled up to his house right at that moment and he glanced in his rearview mirror, eyes concerned.

"Are you sure you don't want me or Mateo coming with?" he said.

Jay shook his head. "This is something I have to do alone."

Clarkson nodded, parking his car right in front of the house and turning around towards Jay. The expression he carried was a serious one, a funny image with the bright orange tracksuit he was wearing. He normally would have made a remark, but right now he could actually imagine himself wearing it, if only because he could. When the principal smiled, it was a smile made of funeral flowers and broken memories, and Jay almost choked on the grief in the air.

"When my son died," Clarkson said," the only thing I could think about was taking my own life, so I would meet him in heaven. Now, I still miss him terribly, but I have gotten two new sons as well. When we reunite in the clouds, I'll tell him all about you two."

Jay felt his eyes tear up, but he blinked it away. Mateo however let the tear escape his eye without any shame, pulling all of them in a group hug. Only when he disentangled himself from it did Jay speak, voice muffled.

"Your tracksuit is actually really nice," he said.

"I'll get you both one too," his new father grinned.

Despite the heavy air in the car Jay felt much lighter when he walked towards his old house, the fresh air also helping with clearing his head. Sahar texted him a few more times to let her know if he was okay and if he needed anything, but he decided to reply later. First he just had to quickly enter his house and leave.

Somewhere he had half expected his father to change the locks, but his key still worked. He waited at the entrance, but when he didn't hear anyone scream at him he just moved towards his room. Everything was still untouched, so Jay started packing, throwing everything in reach in the suitcases. All the clothes felt like chains in his hands, ones he would finally be freed from once he donated them. With every one he packed he could hear the shackles breaking.

Just when he thought he would be able to pull this off without even seeing his father, an icy voice ran right through him, freezing him to his bones.

"Jae-Soo."

He didn't want to turn around, but he did, eyes focused on his father. It took him effort not to show his amusement at how bruised his nose still was, the bandage around it only making it look worse. The purple spread out to his eyebags and yet his father still looked sympathetic, a charming man who only meant well.

Jay knew better.

"I am leaving," he said.

"With that hooligan who broke my nose?" his father said.

"I'd prefer that hooligan over you any day," Jay said.

"Don't get bold now, Jae-Soo."

He had to keep himself from flinching when his father got closer, an old habit he hated. Bracing himself for the hit he closed his eyes, but nothing came, causing him to open them again. His father had placed his hands behind his back, surprisingly having controlled himself just in time.

"Stay," he said.

"What?" Jay blinked.

"The elections are soon, Jae-Soo," he said," it won't look good for me if my son decides to move out of house. So stay, or I'll make this very difficult for you."

"What will you do?" Jay snorted," things can't be worse than they are with you."

"Oh, but they can," his father said with a slow shake of his head," people are fragile. That close friend of yours, what's his name? Mateo Martinez? He could disappear so easily, with that habit of his to fight in the middle of the night. A street fight gone wrong, say."

Jay jumped to his feet, vision red, grabbing his father by the collar.

"Don't you dare," he hissed.

"Let me go," his father said.

"I will break your nose again," Jay said.

"And I will make your friend disappear," his father said.

At that he immediately let him go, stepping back i shock. Though he knew his father was completely capable to do so, it was still surprising to him somewhere. He shook his head, desperation and stress coursing through him. Not his first friend, not one of the only people he felt comfortable with - not Mateo.

"Please don't," he said.

His father slowly smoothed the wrinkles out of his blouse, glancing at Jay.

"I won't," he said," if you listen to me."

Jay swallowed.

"What do I have to do?"

"It's simple," the ambassador said," you transfer back to Gaia and finish your year. I heard you've done at least one good thing in your life and that's getting the Dirani girl to somehow like you. They're influential, so keep her close."

He shook his head. "I really was thinking about just ruining that school of yours, but I can't have a public scandal right now. Besides, now you have a Dirani with you you finally have any use. Finish your last year at Gaia and stay together with her, those are my only two conditions. After that I'll leave you alone and you'll never hear from me again."

It didn't matter to Jay how his father spoke about him, but the fact that he was talking about Sahar like she was a chess piece caused fire to burn in his ribcage. He didn't say anything, despite how much that felt like a betrayal to her. For a moment he thought about his freedom, about running away and never returning. The faces of all the people he had started to care about flashed in front of his face then, one by one laughing without worries.

"Okay," he said," I'll do it."

His father's smile ran a shiver down his spine.

"Wise choice, Jae-Soo."