Naina quickly picked out her night clothes and went inside the washroom. After shutting the door close, she let out a weary exhale before turning to the mirror. The image in front was still clad in the red saree. This saree would forever be a reminder of tonight. Her gaze moved to her lips. Gingerly, she lifted a hand and touched them with her fingertips. A shudder ran through her body as the moment replayed for the umpteenth time in her memory. She pressed her lip under her teeth, trying to suppress the guilt. 

The hows and whys were back in her mind, loud enough to deafen her. More she thought about it, more it perplexed her how she gave in to the provocation. Slowly, it started to unravel. Sameer had been acting different from his usual self for quite some time. She had first noticed it when he had taken care of her needs without saying during her painful periods episode. His care, his worry when she got delayed at office, his attention to the small details, all had been different from his earlier behaviour. At the time of Ambika's accident, not once did he put the blame on her, did not hold her responsible in any manner. It was shocking for her then. That was the time when she had seen his most fragile side as he broke down, along with a relentless stern one when he had adamantly taken her for blood tests. His anger hadn't been out of arrogance, but was a sign of concern that appeared genuine. In upcoming days, she had seen a different dimension to him. To add to this softening of her attitude towards him was what happened today with Saumya. It had baffled her on one hand, and on the other, it had filled her with a sense of fulfilment, a feeling of wholeness at his protective stance. 

Unknown to her, these aspects had been slowly chipping the walls of hatred that she had built around his name. Also, she could not deny that living in the same room and having fleeting instances of being too close for comfort had started to impact her in some ways. Tonight, the cascading effect of all these had permeated through the cracks of her resolve, and she had slipped. The way his gaze had lingered on her, the way his fingers had held her a little tighter, it had ignited a spark that felt thrilling. She was drawn to him in a way that defied any logical reasoning. The softness of his lips, the roughness of his hand, the warmth of his breath, the heat of his proximity... it was fresh in her mind. His words, the way he had whispered in a voice that had hit her with such force, they still haunted her thoughts. 

And for the first time, Naina felt a longing that made her heart race and her mind spin.

Her eyes widened at the realisation. It was the pull of desires, which had ignited a passion in her, with such intensity that even the thought of it left her dazed.  It was an unfamiliar, almost intoxicating sensation, one that made her breathless. But it also provided the answer.

The moment between them was nothing more than a fleeting lapse in her resolve, a brief surrender to the feelings that had started to simmer in her since few days. 

It must have been the same for Sameer. There was no other reason why he would call her 'beautiful'. Their relationship, both before and after the contract, had no space for such compliments. He was caught up in the web of such superficial needs too.  There could be no other explanation for his surge of interest in her. 

She clenched her fists, steeling herself. She could not let such complexities arise between them. This attraction, this momentary rush of feelings wasn't right. They could not sway to such temptation. 

While Naina was reminding herself of her resolve in the silent room, outside, in the stillness of the night, Sameer felt the storm in his heart slowly calm down as he came to a decision. 

When he reached the door of his room, his hand trembled at the knob for a moment. Taking a deep breath, he gathered courage, reminding himself that it was time to face the reality of their relationship. 

The moment he stepped in, his eyes took in every single detail... the way Naina was seated on the bed, hugging her knees, the way her eyes were fixed on a point on the wall ahead, the way she was slightly rocking, the way her lower lip was caught under her teeth. He could tell that she was as caught up in the whirlpool of different emotions as he was. 

Instead of calling her out, he shut the door with some force. The sound made her look up with a start. Even in the muted light of the room, Sameer could see how a wave of surprise passed on her face, changing to panic instantly, as if she had anticipated him to stay out all night, and was shocked to find him back. 

Sameer did not waste any time, fearing that if he hesitated now, he might not be able to say what he intended. Without another thought, he crossed the room in quick strides and reached her side, stopping at the foot of the bed. Naina's expression again changed into a shocked one as she quickly got up, taking a step back to create more distance between them. 

But before he could utter a single word, she blurted, 'I'm sorry.'

His eyes clouded with confusion for a moment, then widened as he processed the meaning. Naina was feeling guilty about whatever happened. She was not blaming him, but herself. Sameer swallowed, rolling his hands in fists, then looked straight into her eyes before speaking.

'I'm not.' His words echoed in the silence of the room.

'What?' Naina was taken aback. 

She had been expecting frustration, explanation, accusation... anything but such a declaration. Since that moment at the dance floor, Sameer had looked as rattled as her. She had assumed that he too was cursing himself for the lapse, since such a move was not anticipated in their relationship. 

'I'm not sorry Naina.' Sameer's voice was soft, yet firm, 'Hum dono... I mean, aaj jo hua... usme maafi maangne jaisa kuch nahi hai. It... it was natural.'

Naina stared at him in silence for a few minutes. What did he mean it was natural? There was no way their actions could be justified, given the way they thought about each other. 

'Tum aisa soch bhi kaise saktey ho?' Her voice remained constrained, 'Hum dono... hamara koi aisa rishta nahi hai jo iss tarah ki nazdeeki ko justify karey. Hamare beech sirf ek contract hai, aur contract mein saaf saaf mention kiya hai ki humein kuch hadein paar nahi karni hain. Hamare beech jo bandhan hai, woh ek jhooth pe tika hai. Aur jhooth ki umr lambi nahi hoti. Hum jaante hain iski expiry date kya hai.'

'Bandhan nahi rishta hai. Aur rishta... yeh jhooth nahi hai.' He insisted, 'Shaadi hui hai hamari. Iss shaadi mein hum dono ki marzi shaamil thi. Expiry date humne khud tay ki thi. Hum chahein toh usey khatm karke iss shaadi ko real bana saktey hain.'

'Shaadi nahi...' Naina paused, as if the conviction was more important for her than him, '...contract. Sirf ek saal ke liye. Isey hum rishta nahi keh saktey.'

'Wrong.' Sameer's reply was instant, and resolute, 'Rishta hai. Ek aisa rishta jisey saat janmon ka maana jaata hai.' He took a step ahead, his eyes never leaving her, 'Kuch toh khaas hoga na jo ek baar saat phere lene se saat janm tak do log ek dusre se judd jaate hain.'

'Kis tarah ki baatein kar rahe ho Sameer.' Naina narrowed her eyes, 'Tum aur main, hum ek majboori ki wajah se ek dusre ke saath hain. Warna hum dono jaante hain ki hum ek dusre ko dekhna tak pasand nahi kartey, saath rehna toh dur. Yaad nahi kaise har baat par hum ek dusre se irritate hotey they.'

He stopped, just a couple of feet away from Naina, 'Mujhe woh waqt bhi yaad hai, aur yeh bhi yaad hai ki pichle kitne mahinon se hamara koi jhagda nahi hua, koi bahas nahi hui. Hum ab irritate nahi hotey. Kuch badal raha hai Naina. Kya tumhe iska ahsaas nahi ho raha?'

Naina paled, the fear gripping her heart. Had he observed the change in her much before she did? Was he somehow aware of the simmering feelings in her, which had started to surface in the time that he was talking about?

She felt a sudden dip in her heartbeat, 'Kya... kya matlab hai tumhara?' 

The absence of agitation at his words made Sameer bolder. He took another step ahead, 'Agar hamare rishte mein kuch badlaav aa rahey hain toh humein unse bhaagna nahi chahiye. Unhe accept karna chahiye. Hamari shaadi ne humein haq diya hai. Hum dono agar contract ko bhoolkar aage badhna chahein toh usmein kuch bhi galat nahi hai.'

Her mouth fell open. Did Sameer even know what he was suggesting? And if he was saying it knowingly, what did he take her for? Just because she faltered in a weak moment, she wasn't...

Anger, mixed with humiliation sparked in her eyes as she glared at him with clenched teeth, 'How dare you? Tum samajhte kya ho apne aap ko? Tumne soch bhi kaise liya ki ek saal ke iss contract ke liye main...'

'No!' The moment the streak of anger flashed in her eyes, Sameer knew that she had interpreted his words differently. He hurriedly raised both his palms, his eyes going wide, 'Not that way!'

Naina went silent, but her eyes were fierce.  

He did not break the connection of their eyelock, 'Tumhare baare mein itni ghatiya baat main sapne mein bhi nahi soch sakta Naina. Tumhari utni hi respect karta hun jitni Anu ki, aur mummy ki.' He gulped, taking a pause, then continued, 'Main... main chahta hun hum iss shaadi ko ek chance dein.'

Naina blinked, her mind getting completely boggled by the confusion he was creating. But one thing had softened her thoughts... his comparison of her with his mom and sister. 

Encouraged by the lack of a furious refusal from her, Sameer took another step forward, 'Agar... agar tum... I mean, if you want... and if you can... because I want... mujhe koi problem nahi hai... I mean, main tumhare saath... kyonki I... I...'

'Kya boley jaa rahey ho tum? Mujhe kuch samajh nahi aa raha.' Naina was more fazed by his inconsistent blabber which did not make much sense. 

Sameer's eyes shifted rapidly from her face to the floor then back to her face, desperate to bare his heart, at the same time, unable to find words that could convey what he really wanted. 

'Hum... hum apni shaadi ko... sach mein shaadi maan saktey hain. Kisi contract ya sharton mein bandha hua ek bandhan nahi, balki isey ek sachha rishta bana saktey hain. Hum ek saal ki lakshman rekha ko khatm kar saktey hain. Tum aur main... hum zindagi bhar ke liye apna rishta nibha saktey hain.' His voice was earnest as his eyes searched hers, looking for any kind of affirmation. 

Naina was stunned. Was this the same Sameer who had not left any chance to remind her that she was no match to him, that he could never ever look at her with such intentions, that their marriage was just a facade for his family? Wasn't he the one who declared to his friends how difficult it was for him to endure her, and how desperately he was waiting for the time when they could part ways? He had made no secret of his disdain for her in their initial months. The cutting remarks, the insults, the condescending reminders that she was doing this for money... everything echoed in her ears. And then, as if a change of scene in a movie, different images of his flashed in her mind... of the more recent actions, which had left her puzzled when they happened, and were confusing her even more now. The change, the sudden switch of his perception, it could not be without a reason. So what was the motive behind his offer? Was he trying to create some scenario where he could fool her first with his emotional talk and then taint her image in front of his family? 

Or he was genuinely offering what she had always craved for... the acknowledgement, the belongingness, the life, the family that she never had? Even then, she could not take it. Not when it was arising out of a moment of weakness and confusion. 

Naina wrapped her arms around herself, as if giving herself a protective embrace,  her voice strained, 'Shayad tumne aaj kuch extra drinks le liye hain. Achanak se ajeeb si baatein karne lage ho. Mere khyaal se humein iske baare mein is waqt aur baat nahi karni chahiye. Kal jab tum sober hoge tab...'

'I'm not drunk, not at all.' Sameer cut her off, shaking his head, 'Main jaanta hun main kya keh raha hun Naina. Yeh sab achanak nahi aaya hai mere dimaag mein. Bohot dinon se, balki mahino se tumse kehna chahta tha, lekin samajh nahi aa raha tha kaise bolun. Aaj jab mauka mila hai, toh main sab kuch keh dena chahta hun. Mujhe uss contract mein koi interest nahi hai.  Usey khatm karke zindagi bhar ka rishta banana chahta hun main, tumhare saath ek naya safar...'

It was Naina who cut him mid sentence this time, staring at him in disbelief, 'Dimag toh theek hai tumhara? Zindagi bhar ka rishta? Ho hi nahi sakta. Mujhe aisa koi rishta na pehle chahiye tha na ab chahiye. Is tarah... woh bhi tumhare saath... kabhi nahi. Mujhe choro, tumhare sapnon ka kya? Tumhari woh talash, woh sab filmy scenes, tumhari journal... unka kya? Tumhari zindagi ke saare plans toh unhi sapnon se judde hain na? Aise kaise unhe bhool kar tum yeh sab soch saktey ho?'

Her words about his dreams, his romantic ideals were like a slap on his face as he recalled how foolish his acts were. It was true that he had always believed in finding his perfect match in a different manner, in a love that would sweep him off his feet like something out of a movie. But life had been different, Naina had been different. She had come into his life in the same manner he had anticipated. Only, he had failed to recognise her then. She had actually managed to sweep him off his feet in a way that none of his dreams had envisioned. The connection he felt with her now was more real, more grounded than any fantasy he'd ever had. She had become everything he ever wanted.

'Naina.' He finally said, his voice softer now, 'Woh sapne they, yeh hakikat hai. They don't matter anymore. Mujhe ab kisi ki talaash nahi hai.'

He paused, trying to gauge her reaction, but she remained frozen, her face still a mask of disbelief.

'Mere sapne badal gaye hain.' He said earnestly, 'I don't want that, I want this.' He waved his hand between the two of them, 'Yeh jo hum dono ke beech aaj maine feel kiya, uske baad mujhe lagta hai hamara rishta contract se aagey badh sakta hai.'

Naina felt numb. What he was saying was overwhelming, confusing, even maddening. Unknowingly, her hands clasped her night dress on the sides, bitterness seeping in her voice, 'Kya karne ki koshish kar rahey ho Sameer? Aur kyon? Maanti hun aaj kuch der ke liye main...' She swallowed the awkwardness of this acceptance, '...I don't know how... par iska matlab yeh nahi hai ki mujhe tumse kuch chahiye. Mujhe na kisi rishte ki zarurat hai na paison ki. Mere kuch reasons they jinki wajah se maine tumhara saath dene ka faisla kiya tha. Lekin mujhe nahi lagta ab paise mere kisi kaam aa saktey hain. Isliye tum koi galatfehmi mat rakhna apne dimaag mein. Mere kisi action ka matlab tumhare nazdeek aana nahi tha, na kabhi hoga. Koi commitment, koi compensation nahi chahiye tumse.'

'Nazdeek toh hum aa chuke hain Naina.' His words finally made her realise the lack of distance between them. 

He had been taking small steps towards her all this while, and it had not registered to her. Now, when his breath hit her, along with his voice, she was startled. They were standing toe to toe, close enough to feel the heightened pace of each other's breath. Her heart skipped a beat, at the undeniable pull she again felt towards him. His gaze was a mix of desperation and sincerity, as if he was silently pleading. 

'Yeh... yeh galat hai.' Her voice came out as a whisper as she quickly stepped back. 

The heels of her feet grazed against the wall that was behind her, making her lose balance. Sameer grabbed her upper arms, steadying her, but the action brought him a few inches closer. The gentle weight of her body pressed against him, the warmth of her body feeling much stronger now that she wasn't draped in yards of silk, but was clad in just a thin pyjama set. 

He did not let go of the grip, looking into her eyes when she raised her head to him. There was defiance in her glance, but also a battle of varied feelings... the fear, the confusion, the hesitation to trust him or even herself. She wasn't immune to the electric charge between them. Rather, she was fearing to be swept away by it. 

'Kyon galat hai?' His voice was hoarse, as he fought the urge to pin her against the wall which was a mere inch behind her. 

Her lips quivered slightly, but she didn't respond. She did not know what to say. This feeling, the twisting of all her nerves, the tingling of her skin, the fluttering in her belly... it was defying all logic that she had been giving him and herself moments back. One thing was clear to her in that moment, her body had woken up to his proximity and to his touches. However much she denied it, the truth was that she was physically attracted to him. So was he, she could see it in his eyes. His eyes were dark with a longing that mirrored her own. 

She sucked in a breath, uttering the exact thought that played in her mind, 'Galat hai kyonki... it's nothing. Nothing but the need of the moment. Yeh bas ek zarurat hai, kisi rishte ki neev nahi.'

Her words were like a bucket of cold water on Sameer. The feeling he had for her, the depth of his love for her, the emotions that had grown in him for her... she had interpreted all of that as purely physical. She did not understand that there was undeniable attraction, but that wasn't the whole of it. He wanted more than just physical closeness. He craved a connection that was much deeper, connection of hearts. He swallowed hard, the sting of her misreading his intentions making his throat tighten. His mind scrambled for the right words, something to make her understand that it wasn't just about the surface attraction. It was about her, the woman who had become a part of him in every possible way.

When he could think of no words, he gently leaned in, and placed a chaste kiss on her forehead. When he pulled back, Naina was perplexed to see that the darkness in his eyes was replaced by a look that was intense, but in a different way. 

'Think about it Naina. Kya yeh sirf ek kamzor moment hai?' He whispered, his voice soft yet pleading, 'Sochna iss baare mein. Mujhe jawaab pata hai, par main chahta hun tum apna jawaab khud dhundo. Main wait karunga tumhare jawaab ka.'

He turned and walked out of the room. Standing rooted to the spot, Naina tried to decipher the meaning of his kiss. It wasn't a kiss borne out of passion or need, it wasn't a touch of inflamed desire... it was a seal of reverence, a promise of respect. What did he mean by such a kiss? Her mind was hit with another onslaught of doubts as she thought about what he said. What answer did he want from her? What was she supposed to think about?

Naina clutched her head as she sat on the bed with a thud. She could feel a headache coming on. Since evening, the jumbled mess of her thoughts and feelings had kept her on the edge, and now Sameer had not just made this unexpected proposal, but had left her with such a gesture that she could just not shake the feeling from her heart... the feeling that there was more to his offer than what he had said. 

More questions flooded her mind. Why did he ask to cancel the contract? What does he have in mind? Was he really offering her a lifelong relationship? But on what grounds? Marriage wasn't a part of her plans earlier, it wasn't now either. Because she didn't believe in it. And that was because she didn't believe in love. Then why to tie herself with someone, without the connection that should be the basis of such relationship. But what about Sameer? He believed in love, he wanted to fall in love. Then why was he ready to accept this marriage for life? Had he also given up on the concept of love, and just wanted this convenient arrangement to go on, in order to avoid any confrontation by his family? But he was always so firm and clear about his notions of love. 

In the guest room, where Sameer had taken refuge for the night, he paced restlessly. He had decided before he approached her that he would not clearly profess his love tonight, because this was not the right time. Naina might not believe him. And he was right in his decision. Naina had been on a different tangent. She did not recognise the depth of his feelings. Perhaps she did not recognise her own either. Sameer drew in a shaky breath. Was her reaction only that... physical? Did she not feel anything for him? Did his efforts not reach her heart even a bit? Could she not comprehend his attachment to everything related to her? 

'Jo bhi ho Naina.' He linked his fingers and cracked them, making a resolve to himself, 'Tumhe dur toh nahi hone dunga. Agar tum do kadam peeche jaogi toh main chaar kadam aage aunga. Par yeh rishta... isey khatm nahi hone dunga. Hamari shaadi ab kisi contract ki mohtaaj nahi hai, yeh mere pyar ki kahani hai, jo bohot jald hamari kahani banegi. Zarur banegi. Bas yeh sochna hai ki kaise.'

They both spent a sleepless night in different rooms, lost in the turmoil of their different emotions and uncertainties. 

I'm sorry but there will be no update for at least a week. 
I'll let you know when the next one is ready