Mort walked into his gamer bedroom, his dumptruck sitting down on his gamer chair. He switched on his computer and logged on to his discord. He went onto the server and blushed, realising there was a new discord mod in the server. Their user was 'kingjulianpussyeatercum34'. He felt his cheek goes red, as he joined a voice chat.

" AHAHAHAHAH IT IS I KING JULIAN. I LOVE WOMEN AND SEX AND WOMEN AND WOMEN. Who the fuck is this loser"

" H-H-H-H–H-H-H-HELLOOOOO KING JULIAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN..... I-I-I-I-I-IIM MORT. HELLO. TEE HEE "

Meanwhile in the depths of mother russia, king julian was serving a lifetime in prison due to shoplifting newborn babies. He managed to sneak in his macbook air and was trying to round up more kittens, and believed mort was perfect as his first victim

" AH YES, HELLO MY LITTLE SCRUMPTIOUS MORT. MY LITTLE BOO BOO BEAR, MY INSY WINSY SPIDER, MY TINY WASTE OF AIR, HOW ARE YOU KITTEN? "

" I-I-I-I-I-I-I AM G-G-G-GOOD KING J-J-J-JULIAN EHEHEHEHEHHEH. CC-C-C–CCAN I HAVE F-F-F-FREE N-N-NITRO WHEHEHEHEHEH"

" NO YOU UGLY FUGLY CRUSTY WUSTY TOENAIL FUNGUS SCORCHING DISGUSTING IRRELEVANT PIECE OF LIVER"

Mort started to cry intensely, as he bought a plane ticket to mother russia. He grabbed his rifle and a dagger, he was gonna kill that son of a bitch.

In mother russia

He walked in with his rifle and dagger, struting into the prison like a work of art. The prison guards looked at him confused, and then went to the cell kingjulianpussyeatercum34 resided in. and saw something.... Horrifying

" WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS KING JULIAN??????????? YOU FUCKING WHORE"

King julian had been two timing him with alvin from alvin and the chipmunks this whole time. He was in shock

" im going to shove this dagger so far up your fucking hooter to the point where you struggle to shit in the morning, and then im going to cut your dick off, sell it into the dark market and proceed to slowly kill you while forcing you to watch gacha movies on repeat, and then ill force you to kill your little side hoe you ugly ass bitch. "

All of a sudden, king julian got out a nerf gun and shoved a bullet right up morts arse, as the prison guard maurice came into the room and tried to stop the commotion.

" MORT YOU STUPID LITTLE BITCH " . mort screamed and shat himself in the process, and passed out due to exhaustion. He was rushed to hospital and died like a week later. Maurice and julian got all the bitches, while alvin was arrested for homophibia. The end.