Before church with Gentry (see #KindaRandomHoverSki)...

Me: "Hey, man, you wanna fight me about it?"
G: "You know what? Yeah!"
Me: "Fine; let's do it like real men."
G: "Alright."
Me: "Rock, paper, scissors, shoot!"
G: "Ha, I win."
Me: "What? No. We both got scissors."
G: "Well, my scissors beat your scissors."
Me: "They can't have, because my scissors are *stainless-steel, never-dulling* scissors. Duh."
G: "My scissors are magic!"
Me: "Oh, yeah, well my scissors? They're held by a robotic dinasour. A t-rex, in fact! And the t-rex is part unicorn!"
G: "Well, blah blah blah stuff that Pierson can't remember because this conversation took place hours ago. So, ha!"
Me: "Ya know what, Gentry? You know that robotic t-rexicorn that's holding my scissors? It's being held by Jesus. Beat that.
G: "My scissors, are, um, made by ancient Romans!"
Me: "How do ancient Romans beat Jesus? Well, actually, they did technically beat him, but whatever."
G: "They have lasers and stuff! Everyone knows that the ancient Romans had lasers."
Me: "Well, yeah, everyone knows that, but my scissors still win."
G: "Hey, insert-name-here, didn't the Romans have lasers?"
Random Guy: "wut 0_0"