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KILL FOR YOUR LOVE.

act three.

(chapter forty-five, to make her realise what she was)

the white room, 75 ADD.

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JUNIPER STOPPED EXERCISING. SHE made that very clear to whoever was watching the security cameras as she laid in her bed, staring at the ceiling as she let lone tears roll down her cheeks. There was no point. She couldn't escape. She was thinking of a fantasy.

And with the ceasing of her exercising, Juniper also realised that breakfast hadn't come that next morning. Dinner never arrived last night and it had Juniper thinking as her stomach grumbled and roared. 

Did Clampitt stop the Peacekeepers' sending her meals? Was it because Juniper hadn't given her anything about the rebellion or the plan? Or did Clampitt finally realise that the Hale woman was a lost cause and planned to kill her? Whatever it was, dinner didn't come and neither did breakfast and Juniper was left with an empty stomach as she laid underneath the quilts.

Her sweat had evaporated and the nausea had died down. Juniper gathered it was because she was working out on an empty stomach and now, as she laid in the bed hungry, she wished she just had eaten the cold porridge. She now didn't care that it was freezing, she would rather have frozen her intestines than go hungry, stomach rumbling. But she didn't eat the clump of grain and now, she was going to pay for that.

And her idea of not going crazy, to at least think of equations or anything other than death or the Hunger Games, had diminished. The white of the room was finally getting to her. The light that hung above her seemed to be higher in intensity. The room was so silent, so quiet except for Juniper's breaths that it made her sigh. She was never going to escape, she realised that now and so, who would care if she went crazy?

Clampitt wouldn't, that was for sure. She would probably use the insane woman as a test experiment for the Capitol. Or put her on display to show the power Snow has, that he managed to make one of the deadliest woman loony. Or they would hide her away and presume her dead. Juniper swallowed a lump in her throat at the idea and soon realised no-one would care if she went insane. 

Except for Finnick. Oh, Finnick. Juniper nearly sobbed at the thought of him. Finnick would care if she went crazy. He had spent their entire friendship stopping her from going insane. But where did they end up? Finnick was with the rebellion, presumably with Annie. They've probably gotten married since the man from Four would have gotten down on one knee the moment he saw her after the Quell. And they were probably happy. And Juniper was in the Capitol, in the white room of hell with tears streaming down her cheeks because she was going to die an inevitable death. Juniper couldn't even remember the last time she spoke to Finnick. 

("They've got—"

"They don't, Finn." Juniper shook her head. "She's safe. She's okay. She hasn't gone anywhere. They just want you to think that they have. She is okay, Finnick. No-one is going to hurt her.")

The last time they had a conversation was just after Finnick had been trapped with the jabberjays. The last time it was just them talking where no-one else was concerned. Since then, it was just smiles and head nods. No more conversations and Juniper knew, as she laid in that bed, she probably would never be able to speak to Finnick Odair again. 

Then she thought of Lucy Stevens. She would be with the rebellion, probably with Haymitch Abernathy. Those two had always been friends, allies of the sort and so they would be together. And Juniper would like to think that Lucy Stevens cared about her. Juniper both hated and loved Lucy Stevens, but wished that the woman cared if she went crazy. She probably would. Lucy would try and find the best head doctor within Panem to fix Juniper's mind if she were ever rescued. Lucy Stevens would try and at least save one of the Hale siblings.  

Juniper quickly got rid of the thought of her mentor as the memory of her father came crashing through her head. Orion Hale would be destroyed if he ever found out his daughter became insane, loony at the hands of the Capitol. He would bury himself in a deep, dark hole until his days were over. He would lose everyone. His wife, his son, his daughter. Everything would be gone. 

And as that notion arose, Juniper suddenly thought about where her father would be. Would he be in Ten? Did Lucy get him and take him to where the rebels were stationed? Or was Orion Hale already dead, Snow killing him as punishment? Juniper's bottom lip trembled at that idea and tried to shove it down quickly before her imagination became too strong. 

But with every passing second, the Hale woman could feel her boredom rising as her tears ceased and dried up on her cheeks. There was nothing to do except sleep and even then, that was a torture within itself. Juniper was completely and utterly stuck as she laid underneath the quilts, feeling the lens of the security camera zoom in on her. 

("Do you really want to stay in this room without entertainment?" Clampitt said. "I'm showing you these clips so you have something to do, something to look forward to.")

The Hale woman would never look forward to the clips the doctor would show her. She loathed the idea of looking back into the past Hunger Games. All those memories she had tried locking into an old chest deep within her heart, but it was like Clampitt was picking the lock, letting them run wild. And with the chest undone, it made Juniper's heart twist and twinge. And that was no source of entertainment for the Victor. 

But, as the hours went on, Juniper found herself staring intently at the white door. She expected it to burst open any moment. She didn't want Clampitt to come waltzing into the room with a black tape, but she wanted to talk to someone. Anyone. And, if anything, she just wanted to see another human figure alive. 

Clampitt had told her that people were dying outside the white room of hell. What people? People in the districts? People in the Capitol? The rebels? Juniper wondered what people the doctor meant and if it was anyone the Hale woman knew. Was Lucy dead? Was Orion Hale dead? Was Finnick Odair dead? Was everyone else dead with Juniper Hale stuck in a white room that was driving her insane with every passing second? The Victor clenched her jaw as she tried to not think about it. But it would be better if they were. Juniper wished they were dead. She wished everyone was dead. 

She wished she was dead. 

("We're going to die, June..." Justice mumbled finally as Juniper turned her body to face him. "Aren't we?")

Juniper dispelled that thought the minute it entered her head. She may not be able to escape, but she didn't want to die. If there was any chance of escaping, the Hale woman wanted to at least be alive for Finnick, for her father, and for Lucy Stevens. Those three were the only ones that mattered to her. The only ones alive that she cared for. 

Suddenly, as Juniper was sure it had reached evening, the door blew open, causing the Hale woman to quickly sit up. And in the frame was Dr. Clampitt. But she didn't seem calm or composed as she normally did. Her hair wasn't done in a neat, tight braid. Her lab coat wasn't smooth as it would have been. This Dr. Clampitt that stood in the doorway had her eyes narrowed with her chest heaving. Her hair was let loose and was frizzy, messy even. Her lab coat had wrinkles within it and was not buttoned together like it would have been. She looked like she was under pressure, like she had just ran a marathon to be here. 

"Don't mind the way I look..." Clampitt panted. She held a black tape.  "I had a meeting I was late for..." 

Juniper didn't answer because she knew it was a lie. She knew when people lied. Or at least she thinks so. 

"Have you been crying?" Clampitt asked. She walked quickly into the room and sat on the bed and as she did, she let out a huge sigh of relief. "It looks like you have been." 

The Hale woman raised a brow as she readjusted herself, merely questioning, "Why haven't I gotten breakfast?" 

But the doctor didn't listen. She was trying to catch her breath. And then suddenly, as if someone had flicked a switch inside of Clampitt, she returned to her relaxed state as she tried to smooth down her hair. Then, she glanced at Juniper. 

"We're going to watch a clip today." Clampitt completely ignored her question about the absence of food. "But yet again, not from the Quell." 

"If it's from the Seventy-Second, I am going to—" 

"Well, you're just going to have to wait and see." Clampitt smirked ever so slightly. 

The door opened again and a Peacekeeper came in, rolling in the trolley with the old television on it. The soldier pushed it into the room until it was in-front of Juniper and Clampitt. Then the doctor shooed them away and the door slammed shut. 

"This clip isn't that important," the woman grumbled as she fiddled with the black tape. "But I think you'll enjoy it. Keep you entertained for a while..." 

Clampitt pushed the tape into the player and the television turned on, crackling like it always did. But it took longer for the screen to actually turn on and as the popping continued, Juniper resorted to biting her nails. She knew Yara would possibly kill her if she ever saw her again, but the Hale woman needed something to focus on. Her heart was racing as she kept wondering what Clampitt would show her, what she would enjoy. 

"Footprints." The sound of seventeen-year-old Juniper Hale echoed around the white room of death as the screen suddenly flicked on. "They go along this part of land and then start on the other one. They went through the water since the gap is too big for someone to jump it." 

"Huh." Cedar from District Seven sighed. Juniper ceased biting her nails at the sight of her coming into the shot. "Nice observation... I say it's a guy. It's too deep and heavy for a girl." 

"What guys are left?" 

Juniper blanched and froze at the sudden voice and sight of Justice Hale. His brows were furrowed slightly as he stared down at the footprints they had just found. 

He was dead, the Victor thought. And Cedar. And Ash. 

The Hale woman tried to look away from Justice's small, innocent face as she began to survey the area that was on the screen. The oak trees were infested with little bugs. The water surrounding them had algae and lily pads. The sky was a light, faded blue and the bright sun caused shadows to descend down everywhere. And everything was muddy. Their clothes were muddy, their hands, their boots squelching with it. And there was the occasional croak from toads. 

"It can't be Rayon or Jagger because they would be in a group and there's only one set," Ash had murmured. "It's either the guy from Three, boy from Five. Can't be Hermes since he's probably with Wing. Or Dallas from Eight." 

"It can't be the guy from Five," Juniper, back then, said as she crouched down, peering at the prints. "He's too small and light. He can't make deep enough prints. I don't know about the guy from Three." 

"So who is it?" 

Before anyone could answer or comprehend Justice's question, a girl screamed. Everyone jumped as the ear-penetrating cry for help echoed around and it sounded so close. And then a cannon echoed shortly, making the four remain silent for a moment. 

"What girl was that...?" Ash murmured as he and Cedar gripped their weapons.

"It sounded too young to be a Career," his counterpart grumbled, her eyes narrowing at the direction of the scream. "It could be the girl from Four or Three... I doubt it's Wing." 

"A guy had to kill that girl..." Justice said. "It would explain these footprints." 

Seventeen-year-old Juniper got up, eyeing the prints and the still scenery. They all stood, huddled, as they tried to process whose footprints they could belong to. But the camera panned to show four figures emerging from a collection of shrubs, their blades thick with blood. The Careers'. 

"Shit." 

The camera turned back to show Cedar, Ash, and Justice looking at Juniper's rigid body before they all blanched, noticing Satin, Rayon, Leona, and Jagger emerging from the bushes. The two boys were pushing each other whilst the girls watched, both giggling as they bit their lips. Twenty-year-old Juniper studied Leona and Rayon. 

She had killed them. 

The tributes from Seven and Ten began to mouth to each other and they all began to quietly sneak away from the Careers'. And they were succeeding, being able to leave before the pairs from One and Two could notice. But then suddenly, Justice stepped on a lone twig. The snapping sound made Juniper, watching, wince.

"Oi!" Rayon yelled. "It's the lot from Seven and Ten!" 

"Aww, the twins!" Satin teased as they all began to rush through the water, Jagger yelling something so incoherent that the microphones couldn't pick it.

"Run!" Cedar spat. 

The Hale woman resorted to clutching onto the stitching of the quilts as she watched the chase pursue. She knew how it ended. She knew what happened, but yet, she could still feel her heart racing as she studied how they leaped from land piece to land piece, swatting away the foliage. 

Toads and egrets were everywhere, the cameras zooming in on how they flew and leaped away as the eight tributes splashed viciously within the water. The algae slowed them all down immensely, but the Careers' were still gaining on them with their weapons raised. And then suddenly, as Juniper watched the chase pursue, she suddenly had a thought. 

Was Clampitt going to show her the girl from Three's death?  That was certainly how the chase ended. But why? Nothing important was about Three's death. Was it to spook Juniper? Show her this is what the Capitol could do if she didn't follow orders? The Hale woman was immensely intrigued, but also scared at what outcomes Clampitt expected showing her that certain scene. 

"Over there!" Justice pointed to an area that was a tree away where no water was, just a massive stretch of muddy land. "It'll be quicker than the water!" 

And so, taking a sharp right, the four of them grumbled as they clambered out of the water, their baggy trousers weighing them down as they began to sprint towards the section. And Juniper, watching the screen, tried hard to close her eyes, but she just couldn't. It was like the day before with Wing and Hermes. She didn't want to see the innocent girl get her life taken, to be an accidental distraction for the others to run away, but Juniper could not close her eyes. Her eyelids would not close. 

The memory of the girl from Three being killed by the Careers' was not something the Hale woman thought of daily, but when the frizzy-haired, short, stubby teenager with acne all over her cheeks came charging out of the bushes, Juniper felt a certain ache within her chest. 

"Juniper!" Cedar yelled. Seventeen-year-old Juniper Hale was standing shocked in the mud at the sight of the mud-covered girl. And twenty-year-old Juniper Hale winced as she heard the girl's screams echo around, her cries deafening as the Careers' began to pick her up, cutting her with knives as they began to pound her head. 

The television turned off when Leona fired a bow into the girl's forehead.

And there were no questions from Clampitt. No statements, no remarks. The woman merely hummed as she took the tape out of the player and began to walk away, a Peacekeeper coming in to roll the trolley. The soldier and the doctor were soon gone with the slam of the door, leaving Juniper shocked and alone.

She could have done something. She could have helped. But yet, seventeen-year-old Juniper Hale stood there doing nothing. She could have easily intervened and yet she stood there. And blamed it on what? The brutality of the Hunger Games? That the little girl, the girl from Three, died because of the viciousness, because of the gruesomeness of the Seventy-Second Annual Hunger Games? 

No. 

No, the little girl from Three with the frizzy hair, who was short and stubby, and who had acne all over her face, did not die because of the brutality of the Hunger Games. She died because of Juniper, the teenager who should have done something, but didn't. 

And that was when the Victor realised why Clampitt showed her the clip. It wasn't to entertain her. It was to make her realise what she was. She did so by showing Juniper how she killed Wing and Hermes. Of how she killed Gloss. Of how she killed Blight. Clampitt was just putting up a facade, a mask of her true intentions. 

Clampitt just wanted to make Juniper realise what she was. 

But sorrow didn't fill the Hale woman. Deep, utter depression didn't fill her at that sudden realisation, thanks to Clampitt. Instead, pure rage did. Anger bubbled up in her stomach, burning her intestines as it began to soar through her veins. It infected every part of her being like a contagious virus. 

How dare Clampitt? How dare that woman show her the clips? How dare that doctor make her realise something that she, quite frankly, already knew? Clampitt wasn't accomplishing anything with her. Juniper wouldn't say a word about the lost cause, about the failed rebellion and she already knew she was a killer. It was something she had to be faced with ever since the Seventy-Second Hunger Games. 

Girl from Three. Justice. Ash. Cedar. Wing. Hermes. Leona. Rayon. Dallas. Blight. Gloss. Brent.

Juniper already knew she was a killer, a cold-blooded murderer. She had killed twelve people. They may not have all been with the blade of a sword or knife, but their blood was still on Juniper's hands. And she had killed all of them. So what was Clampitt trying to achieve?

The same guttural cry began to build back up in the Hale woman's throat as she clenched her fists around the material of the quilts, rage simmering loudly within her veins, within every fibre. Anger filled her entire being. Was Clampitt just trying to get into her head? Or was she just purely showing Juniper those clips for fun? For entertainment? 

The Victor of the Seventy-Second Hunger Games had no idea, but the only thing that she knew was that the moment Dr. Clampitt tried to show her another clip, Juniper Hale would rip her head right off. 

⇢ ˗ˏˋ matz 🎧 !

— this book is written in third-person limited (i think? you would think that i would know) so everything juniper thinks isn't always true or correct