(043) a lost cause
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KILL FOR YOUR LOVE.
act three.
(chapter forty-three, a lost cause)
the white room, 75 ADD.
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THE HALE WOMAN SLOWLY opened her eyes, sighing slightly as she felt a certain pounding sensation in her head. She was laying underneath the quilts of the bed, the soft material caressing her skin. How did she get in the bed?
Juniper sat up slowly, hearing the paper robe rustling as she looked around the room. She tried to remember what happened and groaned at the sudden memory of her and Clampitt's last conversation, causing her to bury her head in her hands.
("Because you could've held on tighter, Miss Hale," the doctor spoke. "You saw in that clip how your hand slipped from Blight's. And you knew it was him, but yet you still let go.")
Blight.
She had dreamt of Blight. Poor, soft, soothing Blight from Seven. Juniper had killed him. She let her hand slip. She could have easily held on, but yet she didn't. Blight was dead because of her.
Juniper let out a sigh as she rolled her head around, hearing her neck crack before popping her knuckles. She must have put herself in the bed, under the covers. Yes, she must have. She did seem rather tired and she wouldn't dare spend more hours laying on the floor with the pillow. The tension in her lower back was going away slightly and she didn't want it to come back.
Suddenly, the door blew open and Juniper expected to see Clampitt come walking in with another tape, but instead, it was a Peacekeeper holding a tray. They barely glanced at the Victor, who remained sitting on the bed, and placed the tray on the side table before swiftly exiting. The door slammed behind him and Juniper could hear it locking.
Rolling her eyes, she looked over and nearly expected to see a bowl of fruit and a cup of orange juice, but instead, she was met with the dull look of the thick, creamy clump of porridge and a plastic cup of water. But instead of the grain being just beige, it was sprinkled with circular slices of something yellow. Banana.
Juniper hummed with content before leaning over to pick up the plastic bowl and silver spoon. Due to it not being porcelain, the heat from the bowl transferred right into the Hale woman's fingertips and she sighed at the feeling. She hadn't felt something hot in two weeks, five days. Or was it now two weeks and six days? Juniper gathered it was considering she just had lamb stew with dried plums and that was dinner and she was now having porridge for breakfast.
She dismissed those thoughts as she scooped up a spoonful of the meal and shovelled it into her mouth. She could still taste the saltiness of the porridge, but the sweetness of the banana balanced it out to be somewhat appealing. But Juniper didn't mind. She would never reject food, especially in her state, and quickly shoved it all down her throat along with the water.
When she finished, she licked her lips after setting the bowl and cup back down on the tray. Juniper looked around the room, mainly at the door as she figured Clampitt would come back to show her a clip or come with a clipboard to examine her. Whatever the doctor would do, Juniper tried to ready herself. But she spent a good twenty minutes staring at the door before she realised Clampitt would not be coming. Then she turned her glance to the high corner in the room, staring right into the invisible lens of the camera.
Juniper guessed that right next to her white room of hell, there was a security room. A Peacekeeper would be looking at the footage, studying how the Hale woman was staring right into the camera. And Clampitt was probably leaning beside him, watching her as well. Maybe she wasn't going to come in. Maybe she was teasing her. Or maybe Clampitt simply wasn't watching.
But why would Juniper care? She didn't and couldn't care less about Clampitt and so, she got out of the bed, swinging her feet across to settle them on the tiled floor. But what would she do? There was simply nothing to do within the white room of hell. There was nothing. No stack of cards. No books. Nothing.
Maybe the Capitol wanted it like that. Wanted her to go insane in her isolation, surrounded by white and nothing else. But Juniper would not give them that pleasure. She would not go insane by the hands of the Capitol. Therefore, once she fully stood, Juniper began to rack her brain of solutions to pass time until Clampitt did indeed come back.
And the only thing she could think of was Lucy Stevens and the training she made her do months before the Quell. It was an agreement Juniper obliged to just to make her father happy and it ended out well for her. She did manage to survive the conditions within the arena.
But then she was captured.
Shaking that thought out of her mind, Juniper rolled her jaw and moved into the centre of the room. She didn't want to become weak within her captivity. If she ever had the chance to escape, she would need to be fit and strong enough to carry it out. And so, Juniper began to do simple stretches.
She circled her arms around her. She swung each leg around. She did hip circles. She did lunges. Squats. Anything to get warmed up. And then once she was satisfied with that, Juniper began to do simple exercises. Push-ups. Chair dips on her bed. Side planks. All in a flimsy paper robe. If she were to ever escape the white room of hell, she needed to be in good shape.
Morning passed and afternoon left with Juniper still doing exercises. She could feel the adrenaline coursing through her veins as she did crunches, the sweat beginning to build up on the skin of her forehead. And even though Juniper could feel her heart squeezing, tightening with every motion, even though her breathing became laboured, even as her body felt as if Clampitt had just set it alight, Juniper still pushed through with the hope that one day, whether it was tomorrow or in a year, she would escape the Capitol.
But Plutarch left her there.
It was now two weeks, six days. It would be three weeks tomorrow. And yet, no-one had come to get her. The Head Gamemaker, the mastermind behind the plan had left Juniper in that arena. And he allowed her to be taken, to be put into the white room of hell.
Plutarch left her.
Juniper tried hard to dispel those thoughts as she brought herself up and down, feet planted firmly on the tiled floor. But the mentions of Plutarch and the plan faltered her movements and soon, as the Hale woman brought herself upwards, hands behind her head, she could feel her limbs and muscles giving way. And then, all the momentum and adrenaline that ran through her being collapsed as suddenly, Juniper dropped herself to the floor with a pant.
Her joints were on fire with the woman's chest heaving with every passing second. A thin sheet of sweat damped her forehead as Juniper winced slightly. She could tell the Peacekeepers' watching the security cameras were laughing at her, maybe even Clampitt as well. But Juniper tried to ignore that as she let herself lay on the cool tiles for a moment, letting the coldness crawl into her flesh and bones before attempting to stand up.
She could feel her legs wobble slightly as she did, head pounding as if someone had struck it with a sledgehammer. Juniper gulped as she stood on her two feet, feeling herself spin as she tried to keep her balance. But the sudden thudding of the door opening caused her to nearly fall.
Juniper expected Clampitt, to see her strutting in with her high heels and black hair swishing behind her, lab coat on. But she clenched her jaw when she realised it was only another Peacekeeper. But this time, they didn't push in a trolley with an old television on it. They didn't bring a tray with a meal. The Peacekeeper that came in was holding a simple plastic cup of water, barely glancing at the prisoner before setting it down on the bedside table and walking out, door slamming behind them.
And the Hale woman couldn't help but raise a brow. She didn't expect a Peacekeeper, of all people, to bring her a cup of water after doing hours of exercises and workouts. But then she realised it wasn't the Peacekeeper's decision to bring her the cup. They were just following orders. And so, Juniper soon gathered that Clampitt must have instructed them to bring her the water.
But it was quickly forgotten about because the moment the Hale woman grasped her fingers around the cup, she drank the water in one, big gulp before going back to her workouts. Lunges. Squats. Planks. Whatever she did, she put the extra effort into it because maybe, if she worked hard enough, Clampitt would order another cup of water.
But she didn't. The door blew open again, but it was just a Peacekeeper coming in to collect the cup. And once the door slammed shut, it wasn't opened again. There was no peep or squeak coming from the outside of the white room of hell and Juniper, who was in the middle of doing push ups, could feel the soothing feeling of the cold water slip away slowly. But at least Clampitt had given her something.
Clampitt. Juniper faltered slightly at the thought of her. Shouldn't she have checked in on her earlier in the morning? Or was she waiting for the evening? But it wasn't like Juniper cared. She didn't like Clampitt. She never would and never will, but if she was going to spend her time in the white room of hell, she would have appreciated consistency in scheduling.
And it was only when Juniper's dinner (which consisted of chicken and some grain) arrived and quickly scoffed down did Dr. Clampitt finally appear. It was when the Victor wiped her mouth that the door blew open to reveal the dark-haired woman walking in, carrying two black tapes. Juniper felt her heart twist.
"You're late," she said, her voice croaky as her chest tightened. "I've been waiting for you all day."
"I'm sure you have..." Clampitt responded as she settled herself on the bed. Juniper hesitantly sat beside her, damp in sweat. "It's smart to exercise. It'll keep your health up."
"So you have been watching?" Juniper mused. The door opened and a Peacekeeper entered, rolling in a trolley with the television on it. "I didn't think you were."
Clampitt snorted as she said, "I get daily updates on what you're doing, Miss Hale. Though I am surprised you conceived the amount of energy to exercise after being out of it for a day..."
Juniper blinked.
Out of it for a day?
How was Juniper out of it for a day? Clampitt showed her the clip of Blight, which was the two weeks and five days mark, and then she had the dream about the man from Seven, which could have only lasted for a few hours.
Out of it for a day.
"What do you mean?"
"Well, you were asleep — or unconscious — for a day."
"So... how long have I been in here for?" Juniper asked slowly. She knew exactly how long, but she wanted it to come from Clampitt's mouth so she wasn't imagining it.
"Today marks three weeks," the doctor responded and ignored how the woman's lips parted slightly. All Clampitt focused on was the tapes in her hand. "If you're up for it, then I have clips I want you to see."
"If it's someone dying—"
Clampitt raised a brow as she said, "Well, of course it is. It's the Hunger Games."
Juniper felt her stomach twist with disgust as she watched the doctor held out a tape and shoved it into the player, the television turning on. It crackled and the Hale woman could feel her heart pounding as she tried to think of what Clampitt was going to show her. She didn't trust the Capitol doctor and feared for what was going to be on the screen.
The crackling of the television stopped and was filled with the buzzing of insects as the screen showed a part of the jungle from the Quell, consumed in darkness. Juniper's eyes could only make out silhouettes of the tributes who were in the shot, but her eyes quickly latched onto a woman who sat with a bow loaded. Katniss.
Juniper narrowed her eyes, studying Everdeen as she glanced around the shot. She could barely see Mellark and was only able to see the faint outline of Finnick's trident. She could hear Mags's mumbling from the microphones and the soft pattering of rain on leaves. The blood rain.
Whilst Juniper's group was running around aimlessly, being burnt alive by the thick, hot, sticky blood, Katniss was sitting peacefully whilst the others slept. Juniper felt her throat constrict at that thought, but tried to get rid of it as she focused her attention on the screen.
When a cannon boomed — Blight — the sound of the rain stopped suddenly and it caused Katniss to jump. No-one else made a sound as they slept peacefully. But just moments after the rain ceased, the shot changed to show fog sliding softly in from the direction of the downpour, tendrils reaching forward and curling like fingers. The Katniss on the screen seemed to have no idea what it was, but the Juniper watching knew it was an hourly horror. Two-to-three.
The fog reached Katniss slowly but surely and without moving, the girl allowed the tendrils to run over the skin of her fingertips. Juniper shook her head at Everdeen's sudden scream when her hand became littered with blisters. The Hale woman winced slightly as the camera zoomed in on the puss that was trapped underneath the flesh and became glad she never encountered the fog during the Quell.
"Run!" Katniss yelled at the others. "Run!"
Finnick snapped awake immediately, rising instantly with his trident in his hand, but when he saw the fog, he tossed a still-sleeping Mags onto his back and took off. Peeta was on his feet, but he didn't seem to be as alerted, looking dazed and it was up to Katniss to take ahold of him, running after Finnick.
"What is it? What is it?" Peeta kept asking.
"Some kind of fog. Poisonous gas. Hurry, Peeta!"
Juniper furrowed her brows as she watched the three awake tributes. Finnick was practically propelling himself through the jungle as the two Victors' from Twelve tried to keep up, but the tangle of vines and greenery underneath their feet kept making them trip up and nearly fall over.
"Watch my feet," Katniss instructed hurriedly as she locked her fingers tightly into his. "Just try to step where I step."
The fog was catching up to them, but Everdeen's orders worked slightly. They were moving faster, Finnick bolting at the front, but the mist still lapped at their heels. And it was only when Katniss and Peeta groaned that the man from Four stopped, realising they had problems, and began to shout encouragement.
The two used Finnick's voice as a guide, but Mellark's artificial leg caught into a knot of creepers, making the boy sprawl forward before his lover could catch him. And as Katniss tried to help him up, the camera zoomed in on Peeta's face and Juniper cringed at his sagged face. The lid of his left eye was drooping, concealing his eye with his mouth twisted at an odd angle.
"Peeta—"
Before Katniss could spit it out, a wave of fog crawled up her arm and Juniper figured the mist didn't just create blisters. It targeted their nerves as both of Everdeen's arms began to twitch as she yanked Peeta forward. But his leg was moving in erratic ways and it was only when Finnick came back that he began to haul along.
However, the three only got a few metres in-front of them when Finnick stopped, saying, "It's not good. I'll have to carry him. Can you take Mags?"
And then, as Finnick on the screen finished speaking, that it struck Juniper the importance of the clip Clampitt was showing her. She was going to show her Mags's death. And then she would probably ask why the old woman sacrificed herself. Juniper felt her stomach drop as she watched Mags get on Katniss's shoulders, Finnick slinging Peeta across his back.
They were running diagonally down the hill, towards the water that surrounded the Cornucopia. As Katniss began to trip slightly with Finnick panting, Juniper tried to think of where she and the others would be doing at that moment. Her and Johanna were probably in the midst of trying to find Beetee's wire, both angry and tired with no sane mind like Blight to calm them.
Suddenly, at the sound of Katniss groaning, Juniper turned her attention back to the screen to see Everdeen crashing to the ground, legs not cooperating. She struggled to get up and it was then that Mags rolled off onto the ground.
"It's no use," Katniss panted as Finnick returned to her side with Peeta hanging onto him. "Can you take them both? Go on ahead, I'll catch up."
It was a doubtful proposal and Juniper, watching, knew that. She would never underestimate Finnick Odair's strength, but she knew that the task of him carrying Peeta and Mags was unfair for Katniss to ask. And even Mags knew that because without thinking, she hauled herself up, planted a kiss on Finnick's lips, and then hobbled straight into the fog.
The screen turned black just as her cannon boomed.
"I have another clip I want to show you," Clampitt mumbled.
But Juniper didn't answer, didn't nod as she remained staring at the screen. She knew Mags had died. She knew, in some way, that the woman had sacrificed herself for Katniss and Peeta. But she never knew the details. She wouldn't dare push Finnick for them. Mags was his only true family and Juniper wouldn't allow him to relive the event of her death. Finnick.
Before Juniper could even go deep into her thoughts about Finnick Odair, Clampitt took the black tape out of the player and pushed the other one in. The screen crackled and popped like it did prior before the sounds turned into that of waves crashing onto sand and the sound of someone scoffing.
"Don't do that."
Juniper studied the shot to see Katniss Everdeen floating in the shallows with Finnick Odair swimming within the water, diving and surfacing, spraying water out of his mouth, rolling over in a corkscrew motion. This was after Mags's death. This was probably the monkeys, something Finnick vaguely mentioned after their reunion.
"What? Come up or stay under?"
"Either. Neither. Whatever. Just soak in the water and behave," Katniss told him. "Or if you feel this good, let's go help Peeta."
The two exited the water and began to cross to the jungle, but as they did, the screen changed shots to show the multiple large, orange monkeys that littered the tree branches, eyes filled with wonder as they stared at the tributes.
Katniss spotted them straight away and touched Finnick's arm, who followed her gaze upwards. The monkeys were everywhere and didn't look friendly as the girl from Twelve armed her bow with two arrows, Finnick adjusting the trident in his grip.
"Peeta," said Katniss, trying to sound calm. "I need your help with something."
"Okay, just a minute. I think I've just got it," he said, working on something at a tree. "Yes, there. Have you got the spile?"
"I do. But we've found something you'd better take a look at," Katniss continued. "Only move toward us quietly, so you don't startle it."
Peeta turned to face them, panting as he said, "Okay..."
He began to move through the jungle, but not quietly. Juniper supposed it was because of his prosthetic, but she figured even a drunk Brent Higgins could've moved more silently. But the monkeys were holding their positions, even with the loudness. But it was only when Peeta's eyes darted up for a second, that he triggered a bomb because the monkeys slid down the vines and leaped impossible distances from tree to tree, claws shooting out with fangs bared. Their eyes were no longer filled with wonder at the tributes. Their eyes were filled with the lust to kill them.
"Mutts!"
Juniper could barely make out what was happening as all she could see in the camera shot was a whir of orange and fur. She barely saw Finnick spearing the monkeys, Peeta slashing at them with a knife, and Katniss aiming bows at the creatures. But she could hear the noises. The three Victors' grunts as they moved into a triangle position. The cries of the monkeys. The scraping of claws down flesh.
"Peeta! Your arrows!"
Finnick was preoccupied and Peeta was too busy trying to get a sheath of arrows off his shoulder so it was only Katniss on the screen and Juniper watching that saw what was happening. A monkey was waiting on its hind legs, staring at the boy from Twelve like he was dinner. He was going to pounce at Peeta and it was no surprise when it did, aiming for the Victor's chest.
Katniss threw a knife, but the mutt quickly dodged it and kept running towards Peeta. And so, Everdeen tried to sprint over to Mellark in an attempt to knock him down to the ground. But she would be too late, she wouldn't make it in time.
But the woman from Six did.
She materialised from thin air. Not even the camera saw her coming. She came out of nowhere and appeared, covered in blood with her mouth open, emitting a high-pitched scream. She threw her skeletal arms as if she was going to embrace the monkey and when she did, the creature's fangs sunk into her chest.
The television turned off.
A silence enveloped the two as they sat on the bed, Clampitt waiting for Juniper to take it all in and the Hale woman processing the two deaths she just saw. Mags and the female from Six.
("The female tribute from District Six, pushed Peeta Mellark out of the way so the monkey's fangs could dig into her chest and not his.")
("Mags Flanagan from District Four, walked right into the poisonous fog so Finnick Odair could carry Peeta Mellark.")
The two women both sacrificed themselves for Katniss and Peeta. It was obvious. Clampitt could see it. Juniper knew it. And Clampitt could see that there was a rebel plan. She wasn't dumb nor idiotic. She had to know and therefore, it confused Juniper on why the woman was still going to ask questions about it. But that didn't stop the Victor from denying any of it.
"They sacrificed themselves for the two..." Clampitt muttered. "Why?"
"They didn't sacrifice themselves."
"Really? It looks a lot like sacrificing to me," the doctor said.
Juniper huffed as she lied, "Why would they sacrifice their lives for Katniss Everdeen and Peeta Mellark? Do you know what it's like in the arena? You want to survive in there, to win. You're not going to sacrifice yourself for two seventeen-year-olds."
"Miss Hale, those two women gave up their lives for a lost cause," Clampitt said, lowering her voice. "They died. And for what? What outcome did they expect?"
"What lost cause?" Juniper scoffed.
"The rebellion. The plan."
Juniper eyed the doctor as she swallowed a lump in her throat before muttering, "There wasn't a rebel plan, Clampitt. I've told you this. It's the Hunger Games. We all just want to win, to live. We're not going to give up our lives for something as risky as a rebel plan."
But Clampitt didn't look convinced, especially as she said, "Miss Hale... you need to stop protecting whoever you made a deal with... because whoever it was, they aren't who they say they are. They left you in that arena. They made people die for an illusion—"
"I'm sorry — doesn't the Capitol send twenty-three kids to their deaths every year?"
Clampitt clenched her jaw, ignored her comment, and continued on saying, "The rebels, the criminals, the outlaws... they are not who they say they are. How can you trust them? How can you protect them? They don't care about you or any of the others. If they did, they wouldn't have asked you to do an impossible task such as protecting Katniss Everdeen and Peeta Mellark. They set you up to fail and for what?"
Juniper did not answer.
"Even now... people are dying," Clampitt said. "People are dying for this cause. A cause that calls for no more death. Isn't that ironic? This idea, this rebellion you are protecting by lying to me, denying the plan... it isn't worth it. The leaders don't care about you or anyone else. They killed the women from Four and Six. Not us. Not me. They did because they only care about their lost cause."
Juniper bit her tongue before speaking. "There was no plan."
"They left you there." Clampitt ignored what the Victor was saying. "Three weeks, Miss Hale. They asked you to die in that arena. They asked you an impossible task. And you tried, but they are still not here. What does that say about them?"
The Hale woman faltered. Three weeks. Mags. The woman from Six. Plutarch left her in the arena. Juniper tried to ignore those facts, to remove those thoughts from her mind. But she couldn't. They were screaming at her, tearing her down. A lost cause.
"I'll let you sleep now..." Clampitt said as she got up from the bed, smoothing over the dip she caused. A Peacekeeper came in and swiftly left with the television. "But, Miss Hale?"
"What?" Juniper hissed. A lost cause.
"May I ask you something?" Clampitt questioned as she began to walk to the door that the Peacekeeper left open.
"You're going to ask even if I say no, so go on."
Clampitt smiled slightly as she began to walk out of the door, but she looked over her shoulder and whispered softly, "What did Heavensbee promise you? What did he say to you in his office?"
Juniper blanched slightly, but tried to regain her composure as she stared at Clampitt walking out of the room. The door slammed behind her and it made the Hale woman flinch slightly as she suddenly wished for the quilts to suffocate her to death.
A lost cause.
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