Somewhere in Downtown Japan
No One's POV
"PIXAL, explain something to me," Naoki called up to the Nindroid up on the streetlight. The boys and Night were lined either side of the street, keeping an eye out for any suspicious passerby while PIXAL had taken the liberty to shimmy up the pole and play around with the traffic camera beneath the lightbulb; Naoki was the one closest to her and had taken the moment to strike up a conversation. "You were against hacking business security cameras, yet you're okay with tampering with city property?" His amber eyes stared up at her inquisitively. "How does that work?"

PIXAL smirked, yet refused to look down at the scientist as she fiddled with the camera. She was still in her fleshy Piper disguise, though it would do nothing with her current activity. "As I recall, you were all for doing something illegal tonight, Naoki," She called down.

"Yes, but while behind a computer screen, where the most danger is if the police trace my IP address," Naoki explained, glancing over his shoulder nervously at the currently empty street. "Out here, anyone can see us!"

At that moment, PIXAL successfully extracted the memory card from the camera. She slid down the streetlight pole and gracefully stepped away to face Naoki. "Now that we know what Ken was abducted by," She explained slowly. "We just need to find out where he was taken to. That, in turn, will also give us some insight into who took him. It may be a little underhand, but at the moment, we have no other way of tracking Ken down and we must find him before it is too late."

Naoki still looked uncomfortable - in fact, they all were uncomfortable about this - but PIXAL had a point. At this moment in time, they had no other choice. "Fine, just... please hurry up, will you?"

"I'll try my best," PIXAL concurred with an arched ebony eyebrow. She waved to the rest of the group and they all headed back to the alleyway so they could check out the footage.

Once within the safety of the brick walls, PIXAL plugged the memory card into her temple port and projected the contents onto the makeshift display surfaces. There were hours upon hours of footage on the card, but PIXAL fast-forwarded the time stamp to the exact same time Ken had sent the SOS signal.

The camera hadn't been pointed directly at the alley, so the group had to fill in the details themselves. Nothing of interest on the footage besides a few people either walking to work or taking a downtown stroll - a few came from the alley, but none of them were wearing (or carrying something that was wearing) a green coat. A car here and there, though not the black van they were looking for. About thirty seconds after the signal had been sent, though, they got their wish - a van similar in make and color sped down the road. If they were going backwards, they would have gone right through the alley.

"Bingo!" Valt cried in excitement, jutting his pointer finger at the illuminated van. "That's gotta be our guy!"

PIXAL nodded as she shut off the projection. "It's just as I figured," She muttered before turning to the group. "If this traffic camera was able to capture a glimpse of whoever took Ken, then chances are other cameras got even more of them. We'll just have to check them all."

The boys blinked at her for a few seconds before slowly and collectively swiveled their heads to glance at the exit to the alley; at the street beyond. Only a few turned back to fix PIXAL with an ARE YOU SERIOUS stare.

"You mean we have to climb up all those streetlights?" Fubuki asked nervously.

"I'm not a freaking monkey..." Lui mumbled, crossing his arms. Or had he ever uncrossed them? No one could ever tell.

"Yeah, I'm all for searching for Ken," Night told the Nindroid. "But you've got a screw loose in your head if you think I'm letting my baby boy climb a two-and-a-half yard tall pole." This time when she reached for Jin, he didn't fight her as she pulled him to her side.

PIXAL gazed at all of them with a condescending smile. "It's cute that you think we have to get our hands dirty for this next part," She said lightly. Mimicking Lui, crossing her thin arms over her even thinner chest, she faced the bricks and projected the camera footage once more. This time, though, even more footage was piled onto the footage they'd already acquired. Some were of the street the black van had used to exit the alley, while others were taken of other streets.

Some of which the boys had never even seen before.

"Uh, PIXAL?" Wakiya spoke up hesitantly, tearing his eyes away from the spectacle to give her a mix between a questioning and an impressed look. "Explanation, please."

"Gladly," PIXAL obliged somewhat smugly. A pink finger reached up to tap the device plugged into her temple. "With the memory card connected to my port, I am able to pursue all of its contents - as well as its infrastructure. Now that I know how it's programmed, and assuming that the memory cards of the other traffic cameras share the same programming, I can hack the other cameras within the city and wirelessly pull the footage."

Everyone snapped their heads back and forth between PIXAL and the rapidly changing projection, showing places all over the city - some were miles away from them. "You're a literal hacking machine," Ren Wu said in astounded appreciation.

Naoki screwed his face into a pout underneath his glasses. "Computers get all of the fun," He sulked. Jin reached out from his place beneath his mother's arm and sympathetically patted his boyfriend's shoulder. Night just smirked.

PIXAL nodded, somehow keeping the projection from bobbing. "Unfortunately, it will still take a while to sift through all of the footage and track the van that took Ken," She admitted slowly. "We might be here for a while. What are you doing?" She asked Kit, who had whipped out his phone.

"Finding the nearest supermarket," He replied simply, not looking up as his fingers flew across the screen. "Something tells me we're going to need some popcorn."

—————

Disclaimer: this will mostly be based off of Markiplier's gameplay.

Freddy Fazbear Pizzaplex
Ken's POV
I noticed the Freddy-head button as soon as the elevator doors closed. With my heart nearly beating out of my chest, I gave it a quick press and sent the small room on its way.

What way, I had no idea.

I took a deep breath and patted down my body with the hand that wasn't holding my FazerBlaster, taking stock of my inventory. Flashlight? Check. Screwdriver? Check. Level 4 Security Badge? Check. Plastic protective gear? Triple check - helmet, vest, FazerBlaster.

Any clue why I was still here, doing this? Still looking for that.

But I thankfully knew what I was doing - I was going to play laser tag. I unconsciously hefted the weight of the FazerBlaster in my hand. And hopefully gain you at the end.

All of a sudden, the main lights in the elevator went out, leaving the neon lights to dust the interior with a ghostly pallor. I felt the floor jerk to a stop beneath me and I took a deep breath, clutching the FazerBlaster to my chest. It's time.

The elevator doors slid open to reveal the arena - a maze of neon-lined walls that led further into the cavernous space. Above the walls hung two large platforms that greatly resembled two miniature planets. From where I was standing, I could see several cutouts of the animatronic mascots plastered along the outermost walls. Preppy yet futuristic tunes played over hidden loudspeakers. It was both futuristic and simplistic in design, and I found myself nodding in approval. I could totally picture kids running around in here, trying to shoot each other with plastic guns.

Actually, strike that - I could totally see myself having fun in here.

I took a step outside the elevator and narrowly missed being hit in the eyes by a beam of red light. I leaned back slightly, caught off guard, before stepping back into the elevator fully. Right. Still gotta be on my guard.

I took retook my step out of the elevator, this time taking care to check the area outside. About a yard from where I was stood a Fazer Blast Party Bot wearing a green helmet with bulbous antenna sticking out the top - the opposing team, I reasoned. "This one is for Stewie," It intoned, leveling its FazerBlaster at me.

Who's Stewie? I wanted to ask, but figured it wouldn't matter. It was time to play the game.

I ducked back into the elevator as the Party Bot fired its next shot, then leveled my FazerBlaster across my forearm the way I'd seen firearms wielders in movies do. I took a quick deep breath before jumping out of my safe space and aiming in the direction I'd seen the Party Bot's eyes. My shot hit true and its thin body jerked violently before it settled in a slightly leaning position, unmoving.

I waited a few seconds to check if it was faking; when it still didn't move, I pumped my fist in the air in exhilaration. "Yes!"

On one of the neon walls near the elevator, I found another flashlight recharge station. Keeping one eye on the Party Bot, I plugged in my flashlight and waited for the top hat to light up. As long as it was there, might as well use it, even though I obviously didn't need my flashlight at the moment.

Once that was done, I slipped the device back into my pocket and made my way into the electronic maze. I made sure to peek around every corner and check for incoming bots before moving forward. I figured that was the object of the game - find and shoot as many of the opposing team before time ran out. I was the only one on my team and no one had successfully shot at me yet; meanwhile, I had already gotten one of the other team's players. That would technically put me in the lead, right?

I eventually came to a small space between the walls that had a small platform in the center; on the platform was an elevated Freddy-head button. I stepped onto the elevation and gave the button a quick press. Almost immediately, a loud buzzing emanated from the device and a prerecorded declaration of CAPTURE THE FLAG rang out under the space age tune.

Oh... it's that kind of game.

After the buzzing stopped, even more Party Bots wearing alien helmets appeared, whipping around every corner in sight with their FazerBlasters at the ready. The sheer number of them was almost overwhelming, but I breathed deeply and closed my eyes, calling one of PIXAL's lessons to mind:

"If you find yourself faced with many adversaries, do not panic - panic is the true enemy in this situation. Instead, take several deep breaths in order to keep your senses sharp. You do not necessarily need to take down several at a time; focus on repeatedly taking down a single adversary."

So that's what I did. I braced my FazerBlaster across my forearm like before and shot directly into the eyes of the nearest Party Bot. When it fell, I turned my attention to the one behind it. Over and over again, I shot at the Party Bots until the crowd had gone completely still. When I was sure that I was the only one still moving, I tilted my head back and threw both of my hands in the air in triumph. "OH YEAH!!"

"Kenny~"

That one address was enough to completely deflate my enthusiasm. My head snapped back down to see Chica making her way towards me, still walking with her weird limp. Instinctively, I brought up my FazerBlaster and shot her dead in the eyes. Like the Party Bots, she jerked a few times before settling, unmoving. I allowed myself a breath of relief before I realized that the Party Bots at the front of the crowd had started to move again, their FazerBlasters slowly coming up to aim at me once more.

Oh right - laser tag players can re-enter the game after a certain amount of time.

That means Chica can re-enter the game, too.

Before the other Party Bots could stutter back to life, I hopped off of the platform and sprinted back into the neon maze. I was only vaguely keeping an eye out for more bots (or animatronics) as I zipped through the lit-up halls. My main priority was getting away from Chica before the effects of the FazerBlaster wore off.

Inside, I was kicking myself for leaving Project Reboot with Freddy. If I had known Chica or ANY of the animatronics were going to be in here, I definitely would have plugged the computer chip into my FazerBlaster - back in that space would have been the perfect opportunity to use it on her and end this Cat-and-Mouse game we got going on.

A perfect opportunity... wasted.

A thought occurred to me and made me slow my pace. I could get another opportunity to use Project Reboot on her, but only if I gained the FazerBlaster. To do that, I had to play the game until the end and come out victorious.

I had to play to win.

But I had left the "flag" behind when I'd fled from the Party Bots. Sure enough, the announcement FLAG LOST played over the loudspeakers. I groaned out loud before quickening my pace. An arena this big HAS to have another flag somewhere, I thought as I frantically peeked behind the neon walls. I just have to find that flag and claim it as my own before time runs out. I couldn't see a clock anywhere, but I got the creeping suspicion that these games operated on an established amount of time - and that my time was quickly running out.

I kept my FazerBlaster braced on my arm during my quest for a new flag. Good call on my part. I ran into several Party Bots, but their declarations of "Stand still so I can shoot you" and "Resistance is futile" faded into background noise as I shot each of them and continued on. I could have sworn I even saw a shadow shaped like Chica, but I simply shot in its direction and went down another hallway. I wasn't taking any chances.

Eventually I came to a small bridge that led up to another platform. Through the neon walls that lined it, I spied another Freddy-head button - the "flag". "Bingo," I said with a quiet thrill. I climbed the bridge to the button and pressed it; CAPTURE THE FLAG rang out soon after. I turned back to the bridge and brought up my FazerBlaster, ready to face the masses.

Soon enough, the first Party Bot appeared with its FazerBlaster. I shot it down, along with the five more that appeared behind it. Then seven more appeared and I raised my gun to them as well. I was able to take down those at the front before I pulled the trigger and nothing happened. Frantic, I pulled it again - still nothing. I pulled the device back to me and discovered that there was a red light blinking along its side.

"Are you kidding me?" I yelled in disbelief over the sound of approaching Party Bots. "Don't tell me I have to charge you, too!" Aggressively rolling my eyes, I set it down and faced my quickly approaching adversaries.

With the FazerBlaster officially useless, I just had to rely on good old-fashioned wit to win the game. The rules had made it clear that physical contact was strictly prohibited, so that left simple dodging. Standing my ground at the flag, I jerked my body this way and that to avoid the beams from the Party Bots, practically bending over backwards to keep out of their way, all the while taking great care to make sure I didn't step on my FazerBlaster. Luckily, they stopped and formed a ring around the outside of the platform - it must be a no-contact game for them, too.

"Found you~"

I almost tripped and stepped directly into the path of a beam when I heard what couldn't be anything other than Chica. Sure enough, the tarnished chicken mascot appeared at the back of the crowd of Party Bots. Once she saw me, her dirty beak opened in a cruel mimic of a smile, and she started pushing the bots out of her way to get to me.

She didn't stop at the edge of the crowd of bots, instead continuing forward. Apparently for her, it was an all-contact game.

I shrank back until my spine was pressed against the flag podium. Chica still advanced toward me. There was no way I could avoid her and effectively dodge the blasts from the Party Bots at the same time. I needed the FazerBlaster. Ducking behind the podium, I picked it up from where I'd dropped it and checked its side. The red light was still blinking. "Not now... come on, come on," I muttered uselessly, hitting it against my palm for good measure. I peeked over my shoulder and nearly squeaked when I saw that Chica was nearly on top of me. "COME ON!" I yelled, banging it against the podium.

The light winked from red to green.

I just about cried in relief, but I had more important things to do, those of which I set my mind to as I whipped out from behind the podium. Chica was the first one I shot, followed by every Party Bot in my line of sight. It was almost as if time slowed down for me as I zeroed in on every one of them, their thin bodies seeming to freeze under my gaze and giving me the perfect opportunity to pull the trigger.

Eventually the trigger stopped shooting again, but it didn't matter by that point. Every Party Bot that had been coming after me, including Chica, was unmoving in front of me. I breathed deeply in the still air, though I didn't dare allow my muscles to relax. Just because I'd shot them all didn't mean that they were completely out for the count - I'd learned that the hard way. They'd jerk back to working order eventually, and who knew how much time was left in the game-

All of a sudden, the space tune that had been playing the entire time ended and the congratulatory sound of trumpets started playing over the loudspeakers. At the sound, all the Party Bots suddenly straightened and rolled away behind walls, leaving only Chica.

"You have defeated the Alien Army!" The announcer proclaimed excitedly. "Good job, Space Cadet! Proceed to the Winner's Elevator for your reward."

I looked up at the ceiling where I assumed the loudspeakers were and tilted my head. "Huh," I whispered to myself, still slightly breathing heavy. "That was over sooner than I expected."

I gave Chica's still form one last cautionary glance before hurrying off the platform and back into the main maze. "Winner's Elevator, Winner's Elevator..." I repeated to myself, jogging through the neon walkways and clutching my FazerBlaster close in case any of the other animatronics decided to make an appearance; I cringed at the noise I was making in the now quiet air. Since what I was looking for was the elevator for the victors, I assumed it looked different than the elevator I had entered from. I turned out to be right, sort of - the Winner's Elevator was on the other side of the arena, and where the entrance elevator stood alone, this elevator had a small box labeled BLASTER RETURN next to it.

I hesitated when I saw the box. I thought I was supposed to win the FazerBlaster at the end of the game, not give it back. Without the gun, what was the point of even coming in here besides wasting time? At first I thought I could fool the system and walked up to the elevator, seeing if it would open anyway.

Nothing happened. And I didn't see any more Freddy-head buttons to press.

Sighing, I resigned to the fact that I would have to return my weapon regardless. I gave the FazerBlaster one last longing look before reaching over and dumping it in the Blaster Return. The sound of it hitting the bottom reverberated through the silent arena, and the elevator opened soon after.

With a heavy heart, I stepped into the cylinder and pressed the Freddy-head button on the wall to activate it. As it lurched into motion, I stared at the floor and rehearsed the explanation I would give Freddy when he inevitably asked where the FazerBlaster was. I'm sorry, Freddy. The game made me return it. I'm sorry.

"Well done, Superstar!" Speak of the devil; he came through on my FazWatch. "You won the FazerBlaster!"

My gaze snapped from the floor to my wrist, which I stared at in disbelief. "What do you mean?" I asked, thinking he had misspoke. "I had to return the FazerBlaster in order to exit the arena - I don't have it anymore."

"Do not worry - what you used was simply the in-game version," Freddy explained. "Fazbear Entertainment made a multitude of FazerBlasters to give away as prizes to the victors. It is a kind of marketable souvenir that customers can play for. Now, go collect your prize from the Superstar Lounge."

The fact that I was getting a new FazerBlaster to replace the one I'd returned eased some of my worry, though I still felt the need to ask, "What makes the prize FazerBlasters different from the in-game ones?"

"It is a simple distinction, really," Freddy supplied. "The prize version is... er... gold in color."

Didn't seem like enough to warrant a prize position, but the kids probably loved it, so I left it at that. Then, feeling extra peckish, I shot at Freddy, "You could have at least told me that the FazerBlasters run out of power after a certain amount of time, ya know."

"Oh?" Freddy asked, sounding confused. "I thought that was obvious. It is a toy laser gun, is it not?"

"A fact apparently known by everyone BUT me," I grumbled, rolling my eyes at myself. I could probably count all the times I'd played laser tag before on one hand.

Eventually the doors opened to the orange neon lined hallway I'd used before, and following it led me back to the gear room where I'd gotten the FazerBlaster. I took the opportunity to rid myself of the sweaty helmet and vest before continuing on.

Soon I came to two roll-up doors - I felt like I had come through the door on the left before, so I went through the door on the right instead. It rolled up as soon as it sensed me standing in front of it, revealing a colorful lounge with a wall of windows that overlooked the neon arena I had just come from. In front of the windows was a high bar table that some kids probably needed help to sit at; on top of the table, placed so that it balanced on its handle and trigger majestically, was a golden FazerBlaster.

I could have walked over to the table and grabbed the gun right then and there, but I couldn't help noticing what was in the lounge. A small kids' bar was in the corner of the room with a few cabinets and an even smaller fridge. I could probably find something to eat if I looked; my stomach was rumbling at the prospect of food. I hadn't had anything to eat since - I scrounged my memory and winced - school lunch the previous day. It felt like a lifetime had passed since then.

Then I took notice of the colorful couches in the center of the room. My knees buckled with exhaustion just looking at them. I had been running around all night and hadn't had a chance to close my eyes in nearly 24 hours. And the couches looked so plush and soft...

I found myself pushing the FazerBlaster and even the kids' bar out of my mind, gravitating towards the couches instead. I was so tired... so sore... a small nap couldn't hurt...

My fingers were inches away from the smooth polyester when I noticed something else in the room. In the wall, the non-glass one, there was a large vent opening. That wouldn't normally catch me off guard, as I had seen many of those throughout the Pizzaplex, but there was something weird about this one. I was standing only a few feet from it, yet unlike the other vents I'd come across, I didn't feel any air coming from it. And besides the residual light coming from the Lounge, I couldn't make out any other lights coming from the tunnel. It didn't seem like it was in working order.

So why was it here to begin with?

The natural detective in me wanted to check it out. To be on the safe side, I grabbed the FazerBlaster and whipped out my flashlight as well - I didn't want to take any chances if I ran into one of the animatronics. To be sure it worked, I aimed at the floor and pulled the trigger a few times, nodding with approval when I saw the red light flicker. All geared up and somewhat ready, I took a deep breath and crouched into the vent.

I turned out to be right about the vent being one track, and I was especially happy that I didn't run into the spider bot from before. But I was even more confused now that I had seen the interior. Despite not being in working order, the walls of the vent were wiped clean, as though something besides air had been traveling through it.

The vent was too big for mice to run through it so many times to get it this clean. So if it was simply a passageway, who was using it?

About a yard or two in from where I'd started, I came to a sharp incline that had me practically rock-climbing to reach its peak. I found another opening that lead to a catwalk that looked over the Fazer Blast arena. Not far from that opening was another opening that lead to another vent track that had an even steeper incline - I was practically standing up.

The new vent lead to an even higher catwalk above the arena. This one, though, had a room with a large window right next to the vent opening. Cautiously, I crept up to the window pane and pressed myself against the wall, my heart pounding against my rib cage. No noises from inside the room told me that no one was currently inside. I took a breath and counted to three before I slowly disengaged myself from the wall to peek into the room.

What I found appeared to be a makeshift room. The bed was nothing more than a ratty mattress pushed into the corner with the comforter askew, and there was crumpled up paper everywhere. In another corner was an old-fashioned arcade game with a black exterior. My vision was terrible in the low light, but if I squinted, I could slightly make out the words PRINCESS QUEST.

But what caught my attention was what was on the wall. The resident of the room had been overzealous enough to paint the name VANNY on the wall in dark purple paint; two long strokes that resembled bunny ears had been added to the picture.

That meant that this room could only belong to one person. I brought my FazWatch up to my face so I could warn my ally. "Freddy - that bunny lady has a secret room in a catwalk above Fazer Blast. I think her name is 'Vanny.'"

"'Vanny'," Freddy said thoughtfully. "That is very similar to Vanessa... and also Bunny. It cannot be a coincidence."

I hadn't made the connection before, but now I saw that it was unmistakable. The bunny lady was named Vanny. And Vanny... was Vanessa. "It's not certain, though it would explain a lot of things," I told Freddy. "Vanessa is a Security Guard, so she would have access to all of the security rooms and have the means to track my every step. And since she has access to the system, she would also have the opportunity to infect the other animatronics with the malware virus that gave them memory blackouts, all while pretending it was a necessary security update."

"Though instead of making the Pizzaplex safer, it turns it into a hunting ground for children," Freddy agreed solemnly.

I nodded with the new information before remembering where I was; more specifically, where'd come from. "Freddy, this room is accessible via a vent in the Superstar Lounge," I told, my panic increasing as realization dawned, stepping away from the window in terror. "That means that Vanny has direct access to a room that could be full of kids at any time of the day. Or night..." I remembered how homey the room had felt, and my stomach no longer felt hungry. "How many children have used that room as a rest stop, not realizing that their captor is directly above them? If they had been running around as much as I've been, in their exhaustion and hunger, they'd be sitting ducks."

Freddy was quiet before ordering quickly, "Ken, you are not safe there. Vanessa or Vanny, whichever name she is going by at the moment could be returning at any minute! Come back to the Fazer Blast Lobby."

He didn't have to tell me twice. I had turned around and slid back through the vents before he'd even mentioned the Lobby. I paused in the Lounge, eyeing the soft couches. A part of me still ached for a nap, but I pictured the couches stained with blood, and the image gave me the motivation to run out of the room.

A quick jog through the neon halls landed me at the exit to the arena; on the other side was the Waiting Area where Freddy was waiting. When he saw me, he straightened and his expression brightened as only an animatronic's face can.

"Good job, Superstar!" He told me proudly. "You made it out... and you got the FazerBlaster," He added upon seeing the toy gun still in my grip. I hadn't noticed that I hadn't yet put it or my flashlight away, and my palms were starting to cramp from holding them so tightly. Freddy continued, "But you had to use your Party Pass. If you find the Security Office, I am sure you will find something that will help you."

I nodded. "Few things to do first," I told him. I held out my hand expectantly. "First, give me Project Reboot."

Freddy opened his stomach hatch just enough for him to reach in and procure the square metal box, handing it to me once he'd closed the hatch. I crouched down on the space-purple floor and placed the box at my feet before turning my attention to the FazerBlaster. There was a rectangular seam along its side; I pried it open to behold a mass of circuitry and wires. There was a red computer chip hooked up to the system, that of which I assumed have the FazerBlaster it's red color when shot. It seemed to be the same size and shape as Project Reboot, so I reached in and gently unhooked the it from the wires. With the red chip no longer needed, I tossed it to the side.

With that done, I picked up the metal box. Separating the top from its bottom revealed the green computer chip, secured in its depths. I tapped the box against my hand, jarring the chip loose and causing it to fall into my palm. It was even lighter than I thought it was - it was like I was simply holding air. Holding it gingerly between my thumb and pointer finger, I carefully hooked it into the FazerBlaster system where the red chip had been.

It fit perfectly, as if it had been shaped specifically for the FazerBlaster. Well done, Luis, I told the most likely dead Security Guard.

I replaced the gold siding and stood up. With Freddy watching patiently, I aimed at the floor and took a few practice shots; the light was green now. I looked back up at Freddy and nodded. "Next I'll charge this," I continued, walking over to the flashlight charging station on the wall and plugging in my flashlight. When the top hat lit up, I took it out.

"And the third thing?" Freddy inquired, his eyes never leaving me the whole time.

I looked around and shifted my weight from one foot to the other; I could feel my face flush. "Um... is there a bathroom near here?" I asked sheepishly. "I really REALLY gotta go."

Freddy tilted his head at me. "How? As far as I know, you have not ingested any foods or liquids all night."

"I know, right?" I exclaimed, my shifting gaining speed. "It makes no sense! But seriously... where is it?"

—————

5621 words.

*Sheepishly looks at my cozy bed and stocked pantry*

I'm sorry Ken, but you're gonna have to suffer a little longer.