CHAPTER TWO
❛ the fugitive. ❜

╔═══════════════╗
S Y D N E Y
╚═══════════════╝

THEMES:
call it fate, call it karma — the strokes
bad reputation — joan jett & the blackhearts

DEAR DIARY, if you're still out there...

I woke up in Bradley Lewis's blood this morning. I wish I could say that was a joke, or a nightmare — definitely not the first one, although things are starting to feel like the second one.

     My shoulder blades throbbed as I pulled myself up, rigid from the wooden planks of the watchtower I'd made my bed on. I opened my eyes to the cracks between, dirt and green grass swarming the long drop beneath me. A sudden wave of height sickness hit me, and I backed into the corner of the watchtower, rubbing a hand over my face.

     That's when I felt it. The scrape of dried blood grazing my skin, crumbling into mahogany dust at my cheeks. It was an unwelcome reminder of what had happened last night.

     Last night...

     The shadow.

     What was that? Or, maybe more importantly, who was that? Whoever it was, they made me feel... something. I'm still not sure whether it was good or bad. But the pull felt magnetic, like the darkness was beckoning me to come closer...

     Fuck me, I thought. Too much deep thinking this early in the morning.

     I had to really think, now that I didn't have the spur-of-the-moment night to ignore my problems in. Was this what I was now? A fugitive? I definitely couldn't show my face back at home, or at school. Hallie and Stan, at least, know what I did. I saw her face when I ran out of school — if going home means I have to see Hallie look at me like that again, then screw that.

     And people might figure it out. What I did...

     But Mom, and Liam... how could I just leave them?

     The blood was really starting to put me on edge. I started inching my way down the steps of the watchtower, cautiously looking back and forth for passersby. Didn't want anyone seeing me in broad daylight and thinking I was a psycho... unless I really am a psycho. I killed Bradley Lewis.

     As I reluctantly replayed the events of last night, a horrible thought occurred to me:

     What if Brad wasn't going to out my powers?

     He never actually finished his sentence. His last words, before his head combusted revoltingly, were "Sydney claims... that she has—" and then POP, went the dickhead.

     What if it was about something stupid? Like, shit, I don't know... my thigh zits?

     To my horror, I almost laughed, but it must have been from the shock. It was at the possibility that Bradley Lewis might be dead, purely because I didn't want him telling everyone I had zits on my thighs.

     Sydney Novak, I told myself, you have officially lost your marbles.

     I felt the grass sink underneath my Doc Martens, and was relieved to find my surroundings were thick with woodland, far from any main roads. I had no real recollection of how I had run here last night. It was mostly a blur. Anyway, I had to find a river, or something to wash the blood off. A river was my best bet, since I couldn't see it going down well if I snuck into the local swimming pool to clean myself there.

     The steady trickle of water soon filled me with relief. I skidded down the river bank, feeling my socks get soaked through as my ankles went under. Crouching hesitantly, I tried my best to scoop handfuls of water and pour them over my skin. It did nothing, except provide a glistening sheen over the dried streaks of blood.

I began to scrub harder.

Finally the blood began peeling away. My skin gasped for air, its pasty complexion a relief to see under the coat of blood. I began scrubbing more furiously, nails clawing at my skin and getting the blood under my fingernails.

Just get it off me, get it off, get it off, GET IT OFF—

Suddenly my face flushed hot, and I found my vision clouding. Overwhelmed and frustrated with myself, I sighed and pushed the bottom of my palms into my eyes.

I don't know how long I spent in that river, but by the time I was done, my skin was clear of Brad's blood, but my dress still splashed with it. I could have washed that too, although I had no intention of going commando in the woods any time soon...

But where was I going to get new clothes without getting noticed? I pondered over this as I trudged through the woods, masked by the shadows of the tall trees. Maybe I could just... sneak in somewhere? I'd left my phone at school, so there was no chance I could contact anyone to get me stuff — and anyway, why would I want to do that? They would just tell me to come home or something.

I can't come home. Not yet, anyway.

As I approached the road for the first time since last night, I could see a gas station on the other side. Swallowing thickly, I noticed silhouettes of human life in the windows, and for a moment I felt like the biggest freak in the world.

An inkling of darkness suddenly pooled in my mind.

I don't know, it was like this... consciousness, out of nowhere. I didn't want to use my powers. Never again, not after last night, and especially not so soon after it. But there was this pull, like a magnet, luring me towards the gas station. I couldn't fight it, so I followed it, and found myself walking blindly across the road, past the petrol tanks and over to the shop...

I needed food. And I needed it now.

The automatic doors slid open with a swoosh, and the air-conditioned atmosphere inside instantly made me uncomfortable. On the radio, 'Bad Reputation' by Joan Jett & The Blackhearts was playing. I cocked an eyebrow and rolled my eyes up to the ceiling. Of course. Very ironic.

At this point, the cashier had clocked me. He was looking me up and down, I could tell, and it took me a second to remember I was still dripping river water and wearing a blood-soaked dress. I awkwardly shuffled behind the shelf before he could inspect me further. Hiding in the food aisles, I pretended to look engrossed in the refrigerated soft drinks, when in reality I was wondering how the heck I would smuggle some food out of here... I really hadn't thought this through.

Use your powers, an invisible voice from inside beckoned me. It felt familiar — like I had felt its presence before. I just couldn't place where.

But I don't want to, I replied internally. I'm scared.

Of what? Yourself?

I don't want to hurt anyone...

Cans and packets on shelves began to tremble, resembling an impending earthquake. I didn't have the slightest clue of what would happen. Worriedly, I glanced over at the cashier, who was also beginning to feel the faint tremor. I forced myself to look away again. Deep breaths, Syd, deep breaths...

     You won't hurt anyone with your powers if you at least try.

     I didn't MEAN to hurt anyone last night at Homecoming, but look what happened!

     Against my will, I was transported back to the overdecorated gym — Brad grappling with the mic, his beet-red face under the influence and sneering in my face, as he spat all his words of spite at me. It just blew up. I blew up. He blew up. I saw red, and then—

     BANG!

     I jolted on the spot, feeling energy crackle through me. The trembling stopped, but was swapped for an ear-splitting fire alarm above me to sound. A shower head began sprinkling water across the shop floor, and the two elderly customers shrieked whilst the cashier fumbled to fix the alarm.

     Now was my chance.

     "Fuck it!" I blurted out, and lunged for two bags of Cheetos and a bottle of water off the shelf.

     "Hey!" the cashier yelled after me, "You're supposed to pay for those!"

     Run, run, run, fucking RUN—

     I had already torn out of the gas station, my shoes pounding against the gravel and then the forest floor again, as I ran deeper into the woods once more. I ran until the alarm was only a distant wail, and my hunger was getting the better of me.

Sinking down to the ground, I tore open the first bag of Cheetos and shoved a handful into my mouth. The taste instantly made my mouth water, and I relished at the feeling of them on my taste buds. Cheetos had never tasted so good... with orange-tinted fingertips I unscrewed the water bottle lid, and gulped down mouthfuls of blissfully cold liquid down my throat. For good measure, I also carefully poured some into my hand and splashed it onto my face, wiping the remnants around my neck.

Somewhere during a gulp of water, I faltered. I let the bottle drop next to my knees, as I laid my head back on the tree trunk and stared vacantly ahead.

     Was this my life now? A fugitive, on the run from the people she loves and the people who might not? A freak who shoplifts and can't even control her own emotions?

What have I become, Diary?

What have I become?

________________________

A/N:

*laughs nervously* hehe... hello. i'm still alive.

i'm aware it's been a BIT OF A WHILE since i last updated, but i can explain. there were a number of obstacles that led to this happening. first of all, i just didn't feel inspired. but then the summer came, and i got this INSANE burst of inspiration for my stranger things fic and i hyper focused on that until i completed writing it (it's called paranormal... you know, if– if you are interested). after that, i was like "right, now that's done and the crazy october month is done, i'll have more time to focus on my other stories!"

that turned out to be the falsest thing i have ever thought.

spoiler: my workload didn't decrease, in fact it actually INCREASED, and then last week when it finally slowed down i got sick 🥲 (which is why this chapter might be subpar in quality, i just don't have the energy to write much more). so... i'm really looking forward to getting a break at christmas!

anyway, i really want to start writing this book again (still might not be super regular, but i want to do it more than every 8 months...) because recently i've had the first genuine inspiration for this fic in a long time! it is actually incredibly hard to get inspired for a show that got cancelled, because i had kind of already said goodbye to ianowt a while ago? but i look forward to giving these characters a proper send-off, hopefully. and, more than ever, i would really appreciate some feedback in the comments for this chapter — it just helps motivation to know if people still care about these characters!

sorry for the long author's note. but if you're still here and still interested in this book... WOW. I APPLAUD YOU. NO SERIOUSLY, THANK YOU SO MUCH!

published: 14th december, 2021