to be fair, my requests are requests, not commissions, and I want to get to them when I actually feel like writing them so they don't feel rushed or obligational

this one is a vent bc it's just another thing on my mind

warnings: flashbacks of silver grooming daniel, daniel is essentially traumatized and johnny helps him see romance/certain intimacies (kissing, not actual sex) as a good thing again

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Daniel was on the dojo floor, head resting on Sensei Silver's lap, and he was talking about Judy.

He didn't know why he was talking about Judy, couldn't even remember what brought her up. Right, it was first kisses. He was rambling, talking about these little tidbits of his girl back in Jersey that didn't even matter. And he moved on to Ali, next. Strangely enough, he discussed Johnny Lawrence a lot more than Ali.

Sensei Silver was a very patient listener, even when Daniel thought nothing he had to say had any real value.

Daniel was staring at Johnny, his eyes focused far from the drive-in movie. They were sitting in the backseat, at least a whole person of room between them.

Daniel wanted to get closer; he didn't know how.

Johnny struck first, as he always did. He put a hand a bit above Daniel's knee, not-quite on his thigh. Daniel slapped his hand away, as if instinctually slapping away a bug, or perhaps a larger, more dangerous predator.

Daniel's face flushed, and apologies were whispered from the mouths of both boys at the same time.

"I want you to touch me," Daniel murmured. "But I'm not sure where to start, after..."

Johnny nodded, his eyes showing a fractional understanding of what Daniel had went through. "You can strike first, this time. You can start...just know that I'm not...I'm not him..."

Sensei Silver had Daniel held securely in place with his large, strong hands. 

Daniel was sitting on his lap, feeling the slimmest bit secured in the unpredictable storm of Sensei Silver. Daniel never knew what to expect from him, though he knew what the man wanted.

He wanted a thank-you gift.

A gift for listening to Daniel's useless rambles, the good-for-nothing loudmouth from Jersey. Because what use are his ramblings when he's got an ass like that, or the prettiest mouth Sensei Silver had seen in a long time?

The obligation leeched at Daniel, clawing at his heart, jerking at his stomach.

Daniel kissed Sensei Silver, his eyes closed tightly.

"Your hair is a lot different," Daniel pointed out, shifting closer and lifting a hand up, carding his fingers through Johnny's hair. "Your golden locks...it's shorter..."

"Yeah?" Johnny tries for an encouraging smile. "You don't have to worry about me growing out a creepy ponytail, promise..."

Daniel, not playing by any particular set of rules, kissed Johnny's head. "It's pretty,"

Johnny laughed incredulously, trying to look annoyed, though his eyes could only show longing. "Alright, now you're pushing it, Larusso..."

Daniel reached out, holding Johnny's hand, Johnny's fingers curling comfortingly around his hand. "You know how I like to push your buttons, Lawrence..."

"That you do," Johnny squeezed Daniel's hand gently, Daniel unable to help but smile from the contact. It had been a long time--too long, since Daniel had been touched this way, from someone who really cared for him. "You're always on my mind, Danielle." Johnny grinned, bringing Daniel's hand to his lips and pressing a kiss to it, putting it back down before Daniel could be overwhelmed by the touch.

Daniel sometimes was uncomfortable by the sight of Mr. Silver.

He would pull him in to kiss him more, for longer, if only to stop looking at him. All logic failed him, had shuddered out and died, much like how his legs had become numb and his stomach filled with dread when he kissed Sensei Silver.

It was just nerves, that was what he told himself. He'd never kissed a boy before. Never kissed a man.

Daniel was wearing the headband that Mr. Miyagi gave him, and he adjusted it on his forehead for a moment when he pulled away from Sensei Silver.

Sensei Silver was looking at the headband, something unfavorable dancing in his blank blue eyes.

Daniel was tempted to pull him in for another kiss, if only to pull his gaze away from the headband.

"I want to kiss you," Daniel said bluntly, his hands wrapped around Johnny's arm, his thumb rubbing the skin there. He was wearing a sweatshirt, but he'd given it to Daniel when he asked for it; it was soft and warm and smelled overwhelmingly like Johnny, like men's deodorant and a bit like peppermint. Johnny couldn't seem to get enough of admiring Daniel in his sweatshirt.

Johnny leaned in a little at that, looking absolutely mesmerized. "You can, if you want...you don't have to, you're not, like, obligated..." even so, Daniel saw Johnny's eyes dart down to Daniel's lips, then back to his eyes, as if Daniel wouldn't notice.

When Sensei Silver had looked, he looked wherever he wanted, shamelessly, for however long he wanted, that hungry look never leaving. Daniel had been so worried in front of others, like Jessica, that their secret would be revealed on how Sensei Silver looked at him alone.

Johnny's eyes were full of life, full of doubts and dreams and fears and amusements. He limited how he looked at Daniel, admiring him, that hungry look marginal compared to how it had consumed Sensei Silver.

Sensei Silver growled in annoyance against Daniel's lips when he could tell he was fixing the headband in his hair. He pulled away, taking the headband off of Daniel and chucking it across the room. Just like that.

Daniel wanted to get fired up, to get up and demand why he'd done that. To get up and leave Sensei Silver in the dust; he'd be leaving him in an uncomfortable situation anyway.

(Sensei Silver was looking at him, hungry and expectant. He was hard underneath him, Daniel could feel it.)

Words failed him. He didn't want to look at Silver again.

He kissed him again, like a drill, punching further into the wooden dummy as the splinters pierced his heart.

"I'm scared," Daniel admitted, which felt awfully degrading to admit to Johnny Lawrence himself.

"There's no need to be," Johnny replied. "Once, I kissed this freshman babe at a party when I was a sophmore...it was her first kiss, and she was nervous, but I told her it wasn't a big deal. Now she's gone around with, like, half the guys in the school--"

"Real encouraging story, Johnny," Daniel rolled his eyes, but even so, his heart was rushing.

"You didn't let me finish, it was character building!" Johnny insisted with a quiet laugh. "This is like your first kiss, and it'll be kind of scary, but in the end, you'll realize that it's fun. I mean, look who you're with." he gestured to himself.

Daniel raised an eyebrow, thinking of a gesture he'd like to give Johnny. Then he frowned, looking uncertain. "I'm sorry, if this whole thing's been a hassle. I know you don't wanna hear me running my mouth when I could put it to better use, I just..." he looked up at Johnny, mouth quirking to the side as he studied Johnny. "I like that I don't have to ask if you care about me...I know you do, Johnny..."

"I care about you a whole hell of a lot, Larusso," Johnny whispered, like a promise, like everything whispered in the backseat of the Avanti would be kept secret just for them. "And I couldn't think of a better use for your mouth than talking about random shit. I mean, we could talk about anything for hours. It'd be a real shame, if you weren't running your mouth, it'd be--"

Daniel locked eyes with Johnny, cupping his cheeks, effectively stopping him from talking. Before he could think on it any further, he memorized the flecks of green in Johnny's eyes, then closed his own eyes and pressed his lips to Johnny's. Johnny kissed him back, faint and oh-so-intentionally gentle. Daniel could sense this was a new thing for him, letting someone else lead. Johnny held Daniel's forearm, possibly intentionally the least sexy place he could have held onto, as Daniel wrapped his arms around Johnny's neck.

Once Daniel pulled away, already tempted to go in for another kiss and in no way tempted to pull away entirely the way he was with Sensei Silver, Daniel found himself burying his face in the crook of Johnny's neck.

He was shaking; what the hell was wrong with him?

"You alright, Larusso?" Johnny asked, holding Daniel close as he crawled into Johnny's lap, legs wrapped around his waist.

"Mm-hm..." Daniel hummed, kissing his neck as if that constituted as proper punctuation.

(When Daniel had kissed Sensei Silver's neck once to be affectionate, Sensei Silver had told him to keep going, even if he hadn't want to. Daniel complied, distancing himself, as always.)

Daniel's eyes were closed, Johnny's chest warm against him as Daniel ran a hand through Johnny's hair. "Just...talk to me..." Daniel murmured. "Be yourself and talk to me, Johnny. That's all I need..."

Understanding seemed to click within Johnny as the movie continued to play, Johnny's car radio turned down as they weren't paying attention. Johnny ran his fingers through Daniel's hair as well, kissing the top of his head as he started to tell him anything that came to mind--his day, stupid things that he and the Cobras did, even the dumb things he found cute about Daniel himself that he thought he'd never voice aloud. Anything to keep Daniel calm and content against him, anything to put that restless, addled mind at ease, if only for a moment.

(When it appeared Daniel had fallen asleep against him, Johnny kissed his head once more. "Looks like it's past your bedtime, Danielle..."

"Screw you, Lawrence..." Daniel murmured against Johnny as he stirred, and Johnny laughed softly at Daniel's antics once more as he begun to feel sleepy himself.)

~~~~~~~~~~~~

i know i write a lot of young lawrusso but it's how i cope with my trauma man

and i'm not gonna talk about my trauma (i'm not) but i will say one thing...when i was with my ex, the terry silver one not the normal one...i had this dumb beanie i wore all the time but i liked it. and one time with my ex he just pulled it off and threw it across the room, like silver did in this story...and the gesture may seem like nothing, but that harry potter beanie was like part of my character, you know, and he just kinda ripped it away...i mean obvi he did a lot worse than that to be called my terry silver ex but that was just...symbolism, you know

to tell a better little anecdote, my (normal, friend) ex and i went to lunch yesterday and he's originally from asia and hadn't had italian apparently. he pulled up to a fazoli's and was like "omg rose! i'm so nervous to have genuine italian cuisine!!" and i had to break it to him that fazoli's is basically the taco bell of italian food lmao...he really said "so it's not really real italian? 🥺" and i felt awful haha

ugh i wrote this all in one sitting and now i have to go to work

next time i'll write one of the requested ships, promise

ciao,

~mw