this one's self indulgent on main but you're welcome whores

also background lawrusso :-)

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Jessica had a love-hate relationship with the slide. One one hand, she has fond memories of being a kid and rushing to it on the playground, her flaming red hair adorned in colorful clips and bows and things as it flew in its natural bushy waves behind her. She'd beat all the other kids to it, sitting proudly at the top before rushing down with a delighted squeal.

And then there was the static.

It was a small thing, something she'd learned about in science years later, but the static from the plastic would cling to her little outfits, shocking her horribly as soon as she accidentally touched one of the metal screws keeping the slide together.

It was too insignificant to mention, really. It was all horribly insignificant.

"Let's go to the swings," Ali suggested, Jessica nodding in agreement.

There they sat, Ali's hands on the chains as she kicked a small start, chewing on her bubblegum. Jessica watched her, staying still other than a slight rocking back-and-forth, going through a bag of gummy bears and popping a green one in her mouth.

"I like coming here at night," Jessica commented. "It's peaceful. No kids, no parents...it's a completely different place..."

"I wouldn't call it peaceful," Ali replied, keeping the swinging of her legs to a minimum so she could hear Jessica's low tone. "It's got a different feel to it, though. Like...dangerous and sexy..." she sent a wink Jessica's way, grinning in a way Jessica couldn't help but reflect.

"Dangerous and sexy? Gee, Mills, you're sure easy to impress." Jessica commented, her deadpan delivery ruined by Ali sticking her tongue out at her. "Is that why you brought me here?"

"Dream on, Andrews. And I'm not that easy to impress. I lost my virginity in the back of an Avanti Firebird parked at a country club that I am currently a member of." Ali said with a faux air of superiority, bowing with a flourish of her hand.

Jessica mocked her flourishing bow. "I had no idea of your high standards, Your Highness." she paused, her smile flickering with uncertainty and thought. "Was it romantic? That night, with Johnny."

Ali raised her eyebrows, a disbelief on her face that Jessica couldn't help but smile sheepishly at. "Sort of?" she questioned. "Well...he brought four condoms, in case he broke the first three, somehow. He was very...gentle...but he also cursed like a sailor..." Ali laughed, her cheeks glowing with a bright pink blush. "I don't doubt he meant well, but that kind of stuff is always awkward the first couple times around. I do feel kind of bad for Daniel...not that he isn't a handful, too, though..."

"That's true," Jessica replied, her smile fading. "So, you've kissed only him...and Daniel...right?"

Ali nodded, slowing her swinging to a stop as she noticed Jessica's expression. "Not that it's very reassuring, the two guys I've been with, getting with each other...what, what is it?"

"I've only ever kissed one guy," Jessica replied, trying her best to keep her voice strong, to not sound like a vulnerable child. "You know, my ex...and he cheated on me with stupid, hot Elizabeth Ann Rooney..."

"Mm," Ali hummed, frowning as she met Jessica's eyes, her own shining with empathy. "I'm sorry, Jess...you know, first kisses don't always work out. My first kiss was Johnny, but he definitely wasn't my soulmate. Same with Daniel. I don't hold anything against them, it just didn't work out. We're happier this way. And one day..." Ali swung her swing to the side, bumping Jessica's side with her own. "You're gonna find a good person. Promise."

"Maybe," Jessica murmured. "It's just...Johnny and Daniel, they both...they care about you, Ali. They're loyal friends, they beat up anyone who tried to hurt you. And I just...my ex was lousy, and he didn't care about me for a second. He just wanted sex, and Elizabeth gave that to him. I just...I've never been kissed by someone that genuinely cares about me, a good person...and I hear all these stories, and I just wish I had one..." Jessica sighed, fascinated by her shoes in the dark. "It doesn't have to be my soulmate. It just has to be someone who means well."

A silence spanned between them for an uncomfortable beat, and Jessica shook her head. "Forget I said anything. I don't mean to be emotional, I just--"

"You've got some low standards, Jess." was all Ali said.

"What do you mean?"

"Just that," Ali said. "You have low standards. Anyone with half a braincell would be lucky to have a catch like you, and you wanna settle for the next half-decent person who likes you? You could do so much better. I'll tell you what," Ali stood, kneeling in front of Jessica's swing, looking up at her with her head cocked to the side in interest. "If you're so insistent on having that kiss with someone who cares about you, then come down here and give it to me good. If not, feel free to swing back and kick me clear across the playground for making the suggestion."

Jessica could only laugh, but definitely not unkindly. "And what makes you so much better than half-decent, Mills?" she asked, not condescending, but a challenge she knew Ali would only rise to. But she'd be lying if she said this wasn't surreal, that she hadn't thought a thousand times over about kissing Ali Mills, about running her fingers through her thick blonde hair.

"Because I really do like you," Ali insisted, nothing but legitimacy in her tone, in her eyes. "And I'd kick anyone's ass to prove it, especially assholes from Ohio that like to cheat on their amazing girlfriends."

Jessica slid out of the swing at that, trying not to look as though she was melting out of her adoration of Ali. "You're ridiculous, you know that? And you don't have to kick anyone's ass..." she lowered her voice to a whisper. "You just have to kiss me..." she still had doubts, even if that was what Ali was asking. Her heart raced, her face flushed, but as she looked into Ali's calm brown eyes, she noticed a halo of orange light reflected off one of dim overhead lights keeping the place from being completely at the mercy of the distant stars. It calmed her nerves; Ali calmed her, steadied her, made her certain. She loved that about her.

Ali grinned, and Jessica was momentarily mesmerized by her lips, which was nothing new. "Gladly," she replied, pushing forward like that first gentle kick-off on the swings, pressing her lips to Jessica's. Jessica could feel warmth bubbling inside her, taking over the nerves and making her grin into the kiss as she cupped Ali's cheeks. She tasted like bubblegum, so sweet and already addictive as she went in to kiss her again, again...

It was only when she started to open her mouth that she felt something odd on her lip, and Ali pulled away, mortified.

"I forgot to spit out my gum, but I didn't want to tell you, 'cause I didn't wanna ruin the moment." Ali admitted, cheeks flushed so darkly, one would think she were sunburned.

Jessica just laughed, wrapping her arms around Ali's waist and resting her head on her shoulder. "I like you so much, I don't care." she insisted.

Ali nuzzled into the crook of her neck as if she belonged there, pressing a kiss there that made Jessica blush in turn. "I like you so much, I want everything to be perfect." she pulled away, looking almost bashful as she played with Jessica's hair, braiding it, which Jessica knew was a nervous habit of hers. "And it will be, promise. I'll take you out, dinner and dessert and everything, your pick."

"Whatever you recommend, I'm fine with." Jessica said. "As long as it's with you, I know it'll be great. Now...we should probably get back to the car. Johnny and Daniel are probably done fake-fighting-so-we'll-get-out-of-the-car-so-they-can-make-out, don't you think?"

"Oh, definitely," Ali insisted. "At least, I hope so. Honestly, it's the oldest trick in the book." she grinned, something mischievous and intriguing to say the least. "I'd love to try it on them sometime."

"Sounds like a plan," Jessica stood, offering Ali a hand up, gladly using it as an excuse to hold Ali's hand the whole way back.

(Suffice to say that Johnny and Daniel were not done, though Ali and Jessica were happy to have more time alone as well.)

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warning: toxic/manipulative relationship warning in this super sexy (or lackthereof) author's note

This one is kinda short and not edited cause it's only supposed to be a drabble, but it's honestly what i needed atm. not only is there not a single jess/ali fic on god's green earth, but this one in particular vents on something that was bothering me earlier

i was working on camp triple pine (ctp!) on the chapter where they--ahem--make love, and it bothered me when i was writing about the kissing that i...well, i don't think i've ever been kissed by someone who genuinely cares about me. no one here really knows, but my friendly ex i mention sometimes, it's complicated and we never kissed. my "terry silver" ex was my first kiss, and he was, well, called terry silver for a reason. he was 22 to my 17 for one, and he was manipulative and cared little for consent after about the first week of our relationship. the summer fling kinda ruined summer for me, and as this semester wraps up, i am becoming increasingly anxious about the idea of him being back in town, even if i'll most likely not see him, because of the trauma he put me through. and i know i've probably talked about it too much on my other stories and that's why i've lost followers, it's just with how i worry for my younger readers and a lack of therapy, i just write a lot of vent fic. but i am getting better! i know my worth, and while that means i'm not dating so i can heal and find a good person, i know that not all hope is lost

besides, the trauma jokes stay spicy lol

apologies for this wall of text half as long as the fic itself, i just figured i should discuss this. i would love to write some more sweet jessica/ali or jessica/bobby or jessica/ali/bobby (and i know, ctp readers, it just looks like jess/bobby. i'm incorporating ali in there too, but with johnny and daniel's dumbass povs i'm having a hard time lmao)

okay now i really need to stop typing lmao

until next time,

~mw