Somehow, his fingers were all but stabbing into the buttons as he tried to calm down. Hojo Emu was not the kind to get angry. Sure, he had his moments (who didn't?), but overall, he liked to consider himself a calm person.

Right now, though, his chest was swirling with pain and disgust. Disgust at Kougami, who had done this, and... And pain that he had managed to use a weak spot of his, just as he was recovering from the Mighty Novel X incident. It just... It just made his chest hurt so much when thinking about it.

"You okay?" A familiar voice made him look up to see Philip joining him. His hair, which had been half-dyed to green recently, was down as the dark green eyed male looked at him. "You seem... Angry. Pained."

"As if you're not," He snapped back, but frowned upon realising what he had said. "I'm sorry, I..."

"No, no, it's fine," He reassured him. "I get the frustration. Kougami, he..."

Emu paused. If he remembered correctly, his Impull had been... "Your... Sister?"

"One of them... But she sacrificed herself to revive me..." Philip closed his eyes while leaning on the wall a bit. "It... Hurts."

"It does," was all Emu could offer lamely. He found that he struggled to find the words, so he chose to stay silent. Philip had too much on his plate right now. He didn't want to burden him even more.

"Your... Father was the one your Impull chose to take after, right?" Philip did eventually ask, even when he looked hesitant to even bring it up. "I... Found out about the repeat of the Zero Day incident cause Aki-chan was in the hospital for her routine check up with Haruna."

His eyes widened. "What?!"

"Shinnosuke-san also knows, he and his family had been in the same hospital. I..." He paused. "I hadn't meant to pry, of course, but it was quite the situation."

"I... I'm so sorry..." Emu apologised, trying to bow, only for his injuries to act out as he grunted. "A-Ah!"

"For a doctor, you sure are reckless," Another voice spoke up, causing their head to turn over. Ace walked in with a sigh, even when the Star of the Stars of the Stars had to lean on a crutch just to walk, what with the burn marks all over his body. Oh, if only his fans could see him now... "Don't do that."

"Do not apologize for what Dan Kuroto did either. You are not at fault for any madman's actions," Philip added.

"But I walked straight into his trap!" Emu protested. "If I hadn't done that...!"

"That makes no sense," Ace pointed out. "You couldn't have known that it would lead to that."

"I wish I had," He bitterly spat out. "I remember reading about some people who had died cause of the situation. We tried to minimize the deaths but..."

He bit his lip. "And honestly, I'm still... I still don't know how to feel about my father. He was the one who created the Bugster Virus. He didn't own up to it, instead he was willing to sell it to cover up his own mistake. He chose to focus on himself! His mistake killed people! His mistake ruined lives! HOW CAN I... HOW CAN I EVEN STILL CARE FOR HIM AFTER ALL THAT?!"

A loud hiss of "QUIET!" could be heard from outside, making the three freeze at that, although Emu looked down, feeling a bit disappointed in himself. "I... I'm sorry, I hadn't meant to yell."

"Dan Kuroto is quite annoying. Don't blame yourself too much for letting that steam off. He sounds crazier than Sento and I combined," Philip couldn't help but joke. 

"Yeah, well, no one can beat him," Emu admitted, even though there was a lip twitch upwards. 

Ace chuckled as well, but offered, "If it... helps you feel any better, my Impull..."

"... was your mother, no?" the right side of W inquired, and upon noticing Ace's confused glance, confessed, "I looked her up once you mentioned her, so... I am aware of your unique circumstances, Ace."

THAT made his eyes widen. He stiffened, unsure how to react toward this. He had thought that no one, that no one would know the truth about him, but for it to be laid bare...

It hit him. He HAD told Ikki during one of their... hang outs, he supposed. Had that been read by Philip? Had Ikki told him? 

No, Ikki wouldn't...

"Ah, you do not understand how I managed to find out, right?" Philip rubbed the back of his neck. "Forgive me, I admit that may have come off as intrusive. I have... the ability to access the knowledge of everything on this earth, so to speak. I understand your mother is very important to you, thus the cycle of reincarnation, no?"

He stiffened, and Emu blinked. "Cycle of reincarnation?"

"Ukiyo Ace's wish to find his mother after being left in the early years of the Roman Empire was so powerful, it spanned across many lifetimes," Philip answered. 

"Huh! ... So you know the creators of Pac-Man?!" His eyes suddenly shined as he turned to Ace expectantly. 

That question was one he didn't expect. So much so that he actually broke out into a huge grin. "Not really, but I HAVE played the game myself. Of course, I conquered it."

"Then we HAVE to compete at one point!" Emu looked so excited just thinking about it, but then it drooped. "That means I have to... face my father, right?"

Philip flinched at the thought. Right, he had to face off against Wakana-neesan again... It felt like a psychological thriller move from a psychopath...

Ace schooled his expression even though he too felt terrified at the prospect. The words she had told him... Would his actual mother... DID Mitsume feel that way towards his reincarnating cycle?

The sheer thought of it left a pit of dread in his stomach. Suddenly, he didn't know if he wanted to find her anymore. There were so many ways this could end, and... and he found that he couldn't stomach the thought of her abandoning him because she didn't want him. All those centuries, running through too many DGPs just for it to go to waste.

He wasn't sure if he could swallow that possibility.

There was silence between the three. (Outside, Jin, frozen, stayed outside, unable to go in when he knew he was the reason, he had been the one to let his mentor fall to the dark side, had let things get this bad.) None of them knew the others, so how could they just talk about their lives?

Still, it was Emu who eventually asked, "... Are you happy you became a Kamen Rider?"

That question led to two very confused people.

"Ha?" Ace looked at Emu, unable to comprehend the question's relevance to their current (or former) topic.

Philip paused, looking perplexed himself as he inquired, "How is that relevant to our situation?"

Emu shrugged his shoulders. "I... Don't know myself, but I think that becoming one had helped me become more... Mature I guess? When I was starting out, I had a goal but didn't know how to manifest it. I had so many things going on that I wasn't aware of."

He looked out the window, his tone growing softer. "Still, I wouldn't have traded this experience for the world. I managed to overcome those issues little by little, and it was because of his inability to own up for his mistakes. So... I don't see him as my father, but I... I do believe he could be better."

(He may never see him as a father. Maybe that's okay, because even when things fell apart, despite what Dan Kuroto had done... He still learnt important things through it. He could take his time, and someday, maybe he could forgive him. Maybe, someday, Emu can forgive that young child, more than a decade ago, who had seen lives as trivial and insignificant. Maybe... There is hope for that connection, one day.

Emu finds that he eagerly awaits that day, no matter how long it comes, and even if it doesn't... He feels at peace.)

Philip smiled at his words. He did have a point there. "That does make sense. I chose to become a Kamen Rider to stop Dopants, but it also led me to find out the truth about myself. Perhaps it hurts. No, it DOES hurt."

(So deluded, so broken had his family become for that grand vision, but their final talk gave him peace. For all the bad things they had done.... They were still family.

He does not have to forgive them too, he realises. And Wakana-neesan did what she could at the end, she had loved him. Nothing, not even an artificial Impull, could change that. That fake sister of his was going down, no matter what!!!)

"However, I've been riding with the demons for a long time. This time is no different," He concluded. "This time, I will take that Impull down. I refuse to have an impostor take her face and pretend to be her!"

Jin's eyes widened from behind the door. They sounded so sure, so determined to make it through... 

But why?

Ace watched those who had become Riders before (or after him, but who was being semantic?) for a while, before he let out a small, genuine smile. "I guess that this isn't the highlight I was waiting for, was it?"

("Forget everything about me, and find your own happiness."

No, his mother had spoken with guilt that day, fear and sorrow. This Impull was anything but her. He...)

"I won't let Kougami Kousei do as he pleases. He's fulfilling his own desire at the expense of others and that is something unforgivable. He did not work to earn the happiness, he used others in order to fulfill his sadistic needs," the DGP player said. "I refuse to let anyone take away others' happiness."

(Happiness, he oh so wished everyone could find their own happiness. He never forgot each wish. He helped when he could, all throughout his reincarnations, those who he had seen as friends and comrades. 

After all, even a kitsune had a heart, did it not?)

"I WILL find my mother someday. And when I do, that will the true highlight of everything I had gone through for the past two centuries," he finished, doing his usual fox finger pose while grinning. His black eyes were alight with mischief and determination, which was reflected by Emu and Philip as the three shared a smile. 

(And indeed he would, but through a different way. Perhaps the truth behind it all will unfold in a different way. 

... In this world, that is.)

"Then it's settled. We should probably regroup with the others and figure out how to take him down," Philip said while getting up. "Emu, your injuries are quite bad, so stay here. Ace, you too."

"You're acting like a sempai now?" The doctor teased. "That's nice of you, Philip, but I don't mind helping too."

"You're still recovering, so no. Maybe Jin should call you reckless instead," he snarked back, causing Ace to laugh while Philip moved towards the door.

Jin froze, and he rushed into another patient room just as he stepped out. The former criminal strained his ears, waiting for the footsteps to fade away before he let out a sigh. Dang it. There went his chance at asking Philip for advice about siblings...

He closed his eyes. Then again, did he even deserve it? Philip had been good from the start, while Jin, he had... he had stolen from people. He had done what Kougami was doing now. 

His eyes landed on his arms, clean and scar-free, and he couldn't help but wonder to himself, did he truly deserve to help? 

Would it have been better if that day...

"I... I'm sorry for what I did to you, Jin. I hadn't realised how painful it would have been for you to go through that alone. I just... I just wanted to feel like someone udnerstood what I was dealing with. It was... selfish, I know, and I... I want to make up for it, if I can."

He felt tears streaming down his cheeks as he slumped down to the floor, curling up, his chest aching badly. He didn't know what to do... 

He felt... 

Why did he feel so alone...?