Summary: In which Orochimaru spies on Sakumo and Kurama.... And suddenly decides to become a matchmaker after some confusion and seeing happiness between the two (somehow).

—————————————

He really has no clue what he's gotten himself into.

He really, really didn't.

Orochimaru can see why these shinobi currently sitting near, needed him, but this is ridiculous. They're spying on Konoha no Shiroi Kiba and the new jōnin, who's asking together in low voices and walking down the street below them. What that has to do with him, he doesn't know.

"Why.... Exactly do you need me?" he voices cautiously and carefully, before seven heads turn to stare at him in disbelief.

"...... Aren't you jealous?" one blurts out, pointing to the two.

"Jealous?" Now he's really confused. Why would he be jealous of the new jōnin and Konoha no Shiroi Kiba? He certainly has no interest in them, only viewing Sakumo as a friend, but those intense looks at him makes him even more wary. "Why would I be jealous?"

"Hatake's down there!" another exclaims. Orochimaru's growing a headache here at their stupidity, and he isn't even kidding about it. He had experiments to do. "And he's your lover, isn't he?"

That, gets his attention, and he glares. What? ".... What?"

"Your lover," the same one repeats. " Konoha no Shiroi Kiba? Hatake Sakumo? Isn't he your lover, Orochimaru-sama?"

He really questions their stupidity. Why would he think– Oh. Oh. He recalls the month before the Uzumaki had arrived, he was spending time with Sakumo, inquiring if the jōnin could use Raiton in his kenjutsu match against him.

Then the conversation dived from that topic to another topic, then to another and another, ending with a promise from Sakumo to keep in touch with him for another spar after they had tied each other in the match they had promised each other. He still views Sakumo as a friend.

No wonder everyone gave him glances as he walked down the streets these days. They thought he was eloping with Konoha no Shiroi Kiba. He peers down again, and the two are still talking with each other.

Sees Sakumo shaking with laughter, with Kurama giving him an amused look out of the corner of his eyes. Watches them continue down the street again as Kurama points at something, and Sakumo seems to be replying in a retort. They seem happy, and that gives him an idea in his head.

A smirk appears, and the group of chūnin look at him warily. "We.... Are going to help them, thanks to your little idea," Orochimaru purrs. Watches their face goes slack with terror and shock as he laughs, a genuine laugh since he had last saw his teammates.

This is going to be so, so much fun since the last he had did this.

—————————————

So, uh, this was probably one of the worst chapters I'll ever write, because I really don't know how to write Orochimaru but he's an interesting character and let's let him get infected by Kurama, okay?

Clarifying about the chūnin, that group ships Sakumo and Orochimaru due to a spar that the two enjoyed and thought that seeing Sakumo with Kurama would make Orochimaru jealous. That wasn't really the case, as Orochimaru took them to be his followers to force Sakumo and Kurama together, which WILL happen in a future chapter (Orochimaru making them go out more often, volunteering to care for the kids, etc), but not soon.

And yes, Sakumo and Orochimaru are good friends. We may or may not see the other Sannin yet (and Orochimaru will stop his experiments at Kurama's request :D).

Terms:
Konoha no Shiroi Kiba - Konoha's White Fang
Raiton - Lighting Style or Lighting Release

As per usual until probably tomorrow, read, review and enjoy!