Mara

I approached the stables with Qia by my side. I dressed in a gown emulating the night sky and its twinkling stars above. The sleeves grew long for the cold nights and days whilst the waist cinched with a small black band. Qia picked it out, stating it would show power. She mentioned once I met with the king and queen of Kaija, I would want to make an impression. I couldn't deny it, the power shined bright, glowing like the stones on my gown in the sunlight.

The horses brayed at our approach and stomped their hooves. My mind should have been on the quest at hand but I couldn't stop thinking of Hona.

His lips were soft; a delicacy to my lustful kiss. My stomach wrenched as I thought about how he denied me and pushed me away. I wasn't sure why he had, but accepted it.

Even though I was queen, Hona was not on a leash. He was his own person, free to love whom he wanted. I wasn't Baria, forcing him to love and marry me, and never would.

Qia strolled through the stables, passing the other horses, until she stopped at the end with Rohell. She placed a hand on the mare's black snout, but her black eyes were set on me. My mind cleared as our gaze connected. When I was present with Rohell, I felt different. A powerful surge of energy overcame me before, but now it was a peaceful understanding, as if we were linked by mind.

"I wish things were always this way," Qia whispered, staring fondly at the mare with a soft smile. She grazed her fingers against her snout.

I remembered the conversation we had in the stables previously. "I thought you'd never turn back time?"

She chuckled at my response. "Never, but if it never happened, that would be better. I remember the days before I fell into Baria's lap. Before I was branded as hers. When freedom belonged to me and my mother."

My heart tore thinking about it, my emotions fell in with Qia. I felt the sorrow deep inside her soul, it swallowed me like a vast forest.

I tore from the sorrow. "What were those days like?"

Her smile was solemn. "Happy," she answered, taking her head away from Rohell. Tears glinted in her eyes. "So happy."

I smiled at her. "That's great to hear."

She laughed again, staring off into the distance. She took a step forward and stared at the stables before returning to me. The sorrow disappeared and hope replaced it. "My mother would be walking again. Rodi would be eating at our table again and I would be free to practice my healing magic freely. Things would be like they were supposed to be." She sniffled, wiping her nose on her arm.

"You are free now," I told her. "You can have that again."

She looked at her brand then to me. "Not yet," she answered. "I have to aid you in this battle against the Rabaka, then maybe after those days pass, and if I am still breathing, I can have that moment back."

Qia was too precious to Tiroa. I wouldn't let her leave with us into the unknown dangers the world had to offer.

"Not if, you will still be breathing after this," I hissed. "Don't even say such a thing."

She laughed again, shaking her head. "I don't know the outcome of this battle, not even my mother does. The seer of the world can't see anything right now. It's like a veil of mist has blocked her vision and the world has disappeared right before her eyes."

It was odd to think there was a veil of mist. I remembered there was mist in one of the dreams I had. "I wonder if it has anything to do with the Rabaka."

Qia flinched and sighed. "I want you to take Rohell with you to Kaija," she said suddenly.

I blinked, stunned. "Why?"

"I have always wished to take Rohell to faraway lands," she started, "but now is not the time to do so. She needs adventure, to see the world. You and her are united as one. I saw it the last time we were here."

My heart panged. Rohell was nowhere near mine. Not after Qia had taken care of her all these years.

"She is yours. Baria is dead, and no longer in possession of her. I will grant her to you and only you." Qia deserved her after all she had been through.

I did not want to keep her in the castle as a servant, but as a guest. I wanted Qia to live her life as a free Udanian and get back to the normal she knew before the inside of the castle walls.

Qia smiled. "I knew you would say that," she laughed. "Please, take her with you."

I blinked. My heart soared. I couldn't remember this feeling. It differed from the one I felt with Hona.

"If I do," I answered. "Know she is not mine. This mare has been cared for by you for a long time. You've felt a deeper connection than I have with Rohell. When I return with her, I know she will want to go to those faraway lands with you."

Qia fell into my chest, guiding her into an embrace. "I've never had a friend," she murmured. "But this feels like what a friend should be."

I felt tears well in my eyes. I wasn't sure if she had ever had a friend before, either. Ever since I had become queen, things appeared to have fluctuated within me. I stood for justice, but I also stood for silencing the demons in one's heart. I was glad to have given Qia the friendship she had always desired.

Qia broke away, busying herself with getting Rohell ready for the journey. She walked me through how to control the mare when riding and how to take care of her once the days of riding had ended. A booming call of voices stopped our conversation.

"Long live Queen Mara!" they shouted.

Qia and I stepped out of the stables. The people of Udan crowded around us, swarming. Hona stood at the front of the line with the others willing to journey with me to Kaija. They held their heads high and proud, smiles on their faces.

He smiled, holding a satin crimson cloth in his hand. My mouth fell agape, heart thumping as I took in the beauty of the image. My people were there, supporting a quest I may or may not come back from. Tears welled in my tears but I held them back.

"Hona," I whispered, a smile blooming. "Did you do this?"

"I did," he said, bearing a crimson cloth to me. "I hope this works as an apology. I wouldn't want you to leave with soured blood in your veins especially toward me."

My stomach turned at his choice of words. I knew he didn't know what was happening with me, but feared what would happen if he found out. I felt as if I was shifting into a monster, turning into Baria before their eyes and they didn't even know it but for now, I'd live in ignorance.

I held the gift in my palms, unwrapping the cloth, and revealed a beautiful dagger. The blade gleamed violet, etched with dull gray carvings leading down to a bound hilt of leather. The blade reminded me of the veins appearing from the itch. I gasped, taken aback by its beauty and power, not able to control myself.

I flung into the arms of Hona. Hona reached out, wrapping his arms around me. He laughed in my ear, filling me with joy. My heart drummed as I stared at his face, taking in his delicate features. His eyes were kind, holding me to the moment.

"Thank you," I answered. "I shall treasure it always." I pulled back from the embrace almost forgetting that the entire kingdom was watching.

"I wanted you to have a way to defend yourself."

"What would I do without you," I said with a smirk and a roll of my eyes.

"Hopefully not die," he responded with a wink, his face straightening. "But with this piece of me, I will keep you safe."

Qia and the horses she was guiding interrupted our conversation. She readied the entire line of horses for our journey.

"Take your pick," she said to Hona.

Hona declined with a hand. "I am staying," he whispered. "Someone has to protect Udan."

I was glad he finally understood.

Qia's eyes widened as her cheeks flushed red. She tried to say something but could not. Instead, she walked past us toward the line of Udanians waiting to leave on the journey. From behind Hona, I saw Qia and Rodi talking before she passed the reins to a horse.

"I know you will be the one to protect it," I whispered.

"I hope my gift proves as an apology."

"It has," I answered, holding it close to her chest. "I will remember you when using it."

"I hope that doesn't mean you plot to murder me?" he laughed.

I shoved him playfully on the shoulder. "I don't plan to." I tried to hold onto the laughter within. "Yet."

Hona's eyes widened as he pretended to be struck by me, dramatically flinging his hand into the air. It was the most fun I've seen him have since being in Udan.

I was interrupted once more by another voice. "We are going to want to get going soon," Lenox called from atop a horse, his nose deep into the map Tiroa drew out. He raised his head. "From the looks of it, the trip to Kaija could take days."

I nodded, staring into Hona's eyes, losing myself. For a moment, I forgot my responsibilities and duties. It was just the two of us at this moment.

"Until I return," I mumbled, my lips parting. I remembered last night and pulled away before humiliating myself once more.

"Excuse me," an older woman with bags under her eyes and brown hair approached me, holding her hands to her chest. "Queen Mara?"

I turned to her. "Yes?"

"Please bring back our boy," she whispered. "Dari has always had a reckless sense for adventure and I fear for his life."

I took in the woman's features and compared them to Dari's. I placed a hand on her shoulder. "I will guard him with my life," I declared. "You have my word."

She nodded, tears in her eyes. "Thank you, Queen Mara," she breathed, sobbing. "Thank you." She rejoined the crowd, speaking to a man. He stared at me and waved. I offered a nod in understanding. He was Dari's father. I could tell from his eyes and hair color.

I turned to the crowd. "People of Udan!" I called, raising my hands in the air. Everyone stilled, except for Arawn who was tying sachetels onto the backs of the horses and placing supplies and food in the pouches. "We are traveling to make history. To gain love. To be united."

Claps and cheers erupted from the crowd. A woman toward the front had tears flowing from her eyes. She held onto a finicky toddler desperate to escape from her arms.

"I hope to bring back to you an alliance," I continued. "A change as promised."

More cheers erupted like a comet. The child fell from the woman's arms, taking off toward the front of the crowd. She pushed through, people's faces turning in surprise as she ran toward Makaio and fell into his leg, embracing it. He turned his attention from the satchels, stunned.

"Rava," he said, causing the crowd to hush as they listened. "You need to go back to your mama."

"No!" she screeched, tightening her grip. "I won't let you go!"

He leaned down, prying her tiny fingers from his leg. She slouched as he tried to help her stand tall. "I have to go," he answered. "Udan needs me."

"Someone else can go," she sobbed, her voice breaking as the tears fell, matching the with the snot flowing freely from her nose. "Please, don't leave."

"It's too late to decide," he declared. "Do you remember what I taught you?"

She shook her head.

Makaio straightened, tucking his hand into a fist. He took in a deep breath and pounded it to his chest. With as much power as he could muster, he shouted, "We are Udan, united as a clan!"

The little girl's eyes lit up like lightning bugs. "We are Udan!" she cried out, tucking her fist to her chest. "United as a clan."

The entire crowd joined in with them, repeating the mantra. Makaio fell to his knees and took his daughter into his arms. I watched as he whispered something into her ear.

After an everlasting embrace, Rava left her Papa. She wandered back into the crowd toward her mother. She snatched her up, placing her onto her shoulder as more tears escaped from her proud eyes. Rava waved at her Papa as she sat atop her mother's shoulders.

I blinked back tears and approached Makaio. I didn't know what it meant to have a family. I couldn't remember if I even had one or not.

"You are a good man," I whispered. "I will do what I can to bring you back to your family alive."

He gave a slight smile. "Thank you, my queen."

"Are we all set?" Lenox called out, mounted on his brown horse. He stood tall, holding the reins in his hands. "Daylight burns with each yap of your lips!"

I shook my head with a weak smile and walked over to Rohell. I placed a hand on her snout and smiled. "I will make sure you return," I whispered, placing my head to her snout. "You will go on the adventures Qia promised."

I pulled back, searching her eyes. Rohell nodded like she understood and lowered her head. I flanked to the right side, and mounted my mare, stomach dropping as I looked down at the Udanians. They waved, whooping and hollering, reaching hands toward me.

I waved to the crowd as they strode toward the iron portcullis leading out of Udan. The small girl, Rava, waved to her papa as they walked. Makaio waved back and so did the others. The only one who did not seem to like the attention was Arawn. His eyes were pressed to the front of the gate, never leaving his destination.

I waved once more as they walked through the gates. I looked up to the soldier, Rooke, I had seen when I had arrived and placed a fist to my chest. Rooke did the same in return, switching the lever. The iron portcullis banged closed, leaving the six of us alone in the woods.

"And we are off," Lenox cheered, humming as his horse trotted as the cheers faded.

"We are," Rodi repeated. "It's weird to be outside the wall."

Everyone nodded but me.

"I plan to get you back inside of it in a timely manner," I assured. "Stay vigilant and we will survive. We do not know what lurks beyond these walls."

The trees flashed by us quickly as we cantered. The horses would take small jumps over stray roots and fallen branches. I tensed, the last time I was in these woods. I was teetering on the back of the ruthless Jonga, blood pouring from my wrists.

Rodi shrugged. "I've heard stories."

"Stories?" Dari's small voice croaked.

She nodded. "Legends from my mother from her grandmother."

Legends. I couldn't remember if I knew any.

"So you know what awaits?" Makaio queried, holding on to the reins. From the terror on his face, it appeared as if he was afraid to fall off. He was leaning toward the left whilst trying to keep an eye on the path ahead.

"If what she said was true," she explained.

"Well," I sighed. "We have a long journey. Plenty of time for stories. I'd love to hear one or two."

"Stories," Arawn scoffed. "Children's play. History means more than legends, girl."

I ignored him, directing my question to Lenox. "Which way are we headed?" I looked back. The iron portcullis steps away. We had already lost sight of Udan. I wasn't sure how I felt considering I had only been in Udan's presence for a few days but I knew what I was doing was right. Not only for Udan but for myself. Somewhere, out in the vast world, was an answer to who I was before.

Lenox held up the map. He flailed back, catching himself on the stirrups of the saddle. Once he was steadied, he stopped his horse. "Ah!" he exclaimed, pressing a finger to the map. "We are to veer left!"

I nodded. "Then left we shall go."

We transposed through the woods, the air on our faces as we rode. The sound of the horses' hoofs clicked on the dirt.

I held onto the reins, leaning forward. It was such a rush pumping through my veins. I cheered, gaining grins and whoops from the Udanians beside me as we rode away from what was called home.