What's with this Wattpad premium? Should we be scared here? Do I have to pay for it? I'm scared.

Jason snuck out the manor with a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. He'd promised to stay one night but even one night was enough to make him insane. He needed a reliever and he couldn't drink. This is the next best thing. He walked to the bottom of the garden, away from the prying eyes of his family.

There he found a dark figure. He recognised the way it was built to see it was Dick. That and his mess of a haircut was hard to miss. He was messing with something shiny in his hands. "What the hell are you doing?" Jason asked. Dick jumped and twirled around. 

"Thank God it's just you,"  he said in relief. "Have you got a lighter?" he added. Jason nodded cautiously. Was he going to get a lecture on smoking again? "Can I borrow it?" Jason quirked an eyebrow but nodded silently, handing it over. He hadn't expected Dick to pull out a cigarette and light it. He passed it back over, holding the cigarette in his mouth. He took it out and smiled. "Thanks." Jason couldn't believe what he was seeing. Dick had been a massive anti-smoker when he was younger. He was practically the poster child for it. It was so weird that Jason panicked a little, lighting his own and taking a puff of it. "How come you're smoking?" he asked, leaning against a tree. He tried to look nonchalant but God did he not feel like that. This wasn't right. Dick shrugged, leaning against an opposite tree. "Thought I'd try a new stress reliever, you make it look fine," he said half-jokingly. 

"But you-"

"I know. At this point, I'm not myself so why should I care about my morals anymore?" he answered with an unusual dullness to his voice. He took another puff. The grey smoke danced around his face, the image ghostly and unnerving to the younger. "Does Bruce know?" Jason asked. Dick chuckled darkly. "You think I'd still be allowed to leave the manor if he did?"

Jason couldn't take it anymore and slapped the cigarette out of his hands, stamping on it as soon as it hit the ground. "Hey! What the hell was that for?" Dick exclaimed.

"You're supposed to set a good example, Goldie! What would Bruce say?" he shouted.

"He'd say I'm just adding to the reasons he'd rather me in a grave," he replied with a spiteful tone in his voice. His features had darkened so much that Jason thought he'd been possessed for a split second. "Better to have a dead son than a pathetic excuse for a one."

"Dick, what are you talking about?" There had never been that much hate in his voice or at least Jason had never heard it. To think it was to Bruce as well. Dick was the goody two shoes who was way too emotional to last more than two minutes in the scream fights that Jason normally engaged in with Bruce. It made him think what kind of hatred he'd just not seen over the years. "I give up everything for him. My mental, physical and emotional health went out the window when I took his place. What do I get? Not even a fucking thank you! He wouldn't give a fuck if I died let alone try to run away," Dick explained. Jason tensed up. Maybe he should've left Dick to smoke. Now he had to try and help him through whatever this was. "Of course he would care? What's wrong with you?" Jason asked. This wasn't Dick, it couldn't be. He could see the pure anger glowing in his brilliant blue eyes. "A lot of things are wrong with me lil wing. Thought you would've picked up on it by now." Dick's voice wasn't his. It wasn't anyone's. Please just let him be possessed. He couldn't take it anymore, he didn't want to nor need to deal with this. "Dick stop it!" he ordered.

Dick sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose to try to release the tension of this encounter. He didn't mean to blow up at Jason like that, heaven knows he didn't need it but Dick did. The frustrations were growing and his mind was constantly searching for ways to let them out without hurting someone. "Sorry Jay, it's just, I thought when Bruce came back I'd get at least a nod of gratefulness. I wanted him to tell me I wasn't a complete disappointment, that I wasn't just the first Robin. Sometimes I think he only keeps me around because he's nostalgic about those times," Dick explained. "He knew that I hate the title of Batman, he's known that ever since I was thirteen. You'd think this far down the line he would thank me for doing it for the betterment of everyone else." The younger sighed, taking a puff. 

"You know him better than anyone and you know he-"

"I don't want to give him the excuse Jason. He's had long enough to learn how I feel. It's not like my tells are all that impossible to see no matter how hard I try to hide them." There's an uncomfortable silence that neither can stand. "Wanna try stoptober?" Jason asked, trying to spark a conversation. "It's January Jason." Dick reminded him. His voice was all but devoid of that playful teasing tone he used most of the time.

"Not my point."

"Then what is your point?" 

"We can get you a new stress reliever, not new lungs," Jason reasoned. Dick cocked his head in confusion. "What kind of stress reliever? Alcohol? I've not tried that yet."

"No not that and remind me to take you for your first drink. Anyways, you're giving back the title of Batman right? Just do what you did when you were younger. Leg it for a while, maybe not years but a week or something," Jason suggested, finishing the last of the cigarette. 

"Can't, Damian and Tim need-"

"Then I'll get the League involved. Better yet I'll tell both Wonder Woman and Black Canary personally." Jason was about to walk off when Dick gripped his upper arm and turned him around. His hands clutched onto his shoulders like vices. He'd never looked so desperate. "You can't do that."

"Yes I can."

"Jason please don't," Dick pleaded. Dick had just pleaded. Pleaded to Jason. He froze. 

"What?"

"I'll stop smoking I promise just don't tell anyone," Dick said. Jason grabbed his arms and slowly took them off his shoulders. "Why?" He couldn't help but ask. 

"They can't keep bailing me out when I'm struggling. I can do this alone. This is our secret."

"I don't follow."

"Don't tell a soul Little Wing. Please. I'll do this." In all honesty, he was unconvinced by this determination but he just groaned and nodded. "Fine. What're you going to do then?" Dick walked past him towards the manor and turned back with a small glint of mischief in his eyes. "Take a brother's advice."

The next morning when Alfred went to wake Dick up, he found the room empty. Dick hadn't been due to leave for another five days. There were few clothes left in his room and important items had been taken. Alfred's breath caught in his throat and he jogged to Bruce's side with the knowledge this wouldn't end well for them. "He's gone again, sir."

"Who?" Tim asked.

"Master Dick. He's taken all his belongings. There's no note and he isn't supposed to leave for another five days." He tried to keep monotone but they could hear the panic in his voice. He was too old for this. "He's done a runner," Jason muttered. Damian eyed him suspiciously. 

"Were you the last to talk to him? What did you say Todd?" Damian questioned. 

"Actually, I was the last to talk to him. Tim, I want you to try and find his phone signal, Damian suit up your with me, Jason search Dick's room for evidence," Bruce announced but Jason knew his statement wasn't true.  They all nodded and went to their post. Only Jason knew where the bird was. He just hoped it wasn't permanent.

A week passed with no sign of Dick until there was a knock on the door. Damian rushed to open it and was greeted with the sight of his older brother wearing a bright smile. "Miss me little buddy-" He was cut off by the punch he got to the stomach. 

"Never do that again!" Damian shouted, hugging him after. Dick laughed and walked into the manor, still smiling. "It wasn't that bad. Where are the-" He was cut off by Tim tackle hugging him. "Missed you too Timmy," he wheezed. 

"You are wearing a tracker from now on you hear me?" Tim exclaimed. He got up and Dick steadied himself on the couch, his smile still bright as ever. Damian hadn't seen it so bright in a while now. "Bruce, Dick's back! Alfred come here!" Tim shrieked through the house. 

"Think you burst my eardrum," Dick teased, rubbing his ear. He received a soft glare but only laughed it off. "Okay, I deserve that. I thought you'd enjoy the peace and quiet without me around."

"Are you kidding me? This kid has been driving me mad requesting updates!" Tim exclaimed.

"I was simply making sure you were operating the case appropriately," Damian defended. God forbid he actually admit to feeling scared.

A few moments later, Bruce came bounding in and a smile grew on his face when he saw his eldest sitting on a couch armrest. "Richard John Grayson, you nearly gave me a heart attack!" Bruce shouted, pulling him into a tight hug. For the first time in their lives, Tim and Damian saw Dick look awkward in a hug. That was a sign of the relationship between him and Bruce wasn't right. "Yeah, err, sorry about that. Just needed to get away for a few days," he answered, gently wriggling out of the hug. Bruce noticed this and his smile faltered as did Dick's. Jason and Alfred soon joined. He got a sharp dig from Jason and an empty glare. "You know by now not to take my fucking advice you dick," Jason snapped. 

"Admit it you missed me," Dick taunted, booping his nose. 

"For five minutes tops," Jason muttered. He got a laugh out of Dick. 

"Hi Alfie, sorry for leaving my room a mess," Dick said. 

"It was better than last time Master Dick," Alfred answered with a small chuckle. He was happy to have the joyous Dick back instead of the anger fuelled one that returned home when he left for the first time.

That night Bruce took Dick aside. He needed a question answered. "Why?" he asked. 

"Why what?" Dick asked, knowing perfectly well what the question was. They both knew that. "You know what I'm asking Dick," Bruce stated. They had seated themselves in the office so the others wouldn't hear from the cave. "Yeah I do I'm just trying to stall," Dick answered. He was currently doing a handstand, partially to piss off Bruce and to keep himself calm. "Stand up and talk to me," Bruce ordered.

"I'm more comfortable like this," Dick retorted. 

"Dick please." He groaned and stood up. 

"Why did you run again?"

"Would you believe I'm practising for a TV show where famous people are on the run from police?" Bruce shook his head. "Worth a shot." He took a seat on the armchair and pulled on leg up to rest his arms and chin on. "Do I have to answer this question?"

"Dick." He rolled his eyes.

"Fine. I left because of you and what you made me do," Dick said slowly. His eyes were firmly placed on a darkened part of the wooden floor.

Immediately, Bruce felt guilt and dipped to meet Dick's eyes. "What did I do?" He was genuine. Dick could see that. Dick knew that. Yet that anger of him not knowing rose up in his throat and it was hard to keep it down. "You knew that being Batman hurt me, that I never wanted that title. You knew I didn't want that but I still did it to keep this family together," Dick replied. He stood up and sometimes he wished he could tower over Bruce to make him feel intimidated. That would never happen as he was lucky to be just shy of Bruce's height. "What did I get in return? Nothing! I got fuck all!" There was that anger. He hadn't bothered to push it down. He was wearing that smile that was like spikes for anyone to see. "There was a lot of-"

"You don't fucking care Bruce! I didn't even get a thank you for everything I gave up. I gave up my well being to take on your title.  I started smoking to try and help me with the stress-"

"You started what?" Bruce shouted. Dick wanted to punch himself for letting that slip. 

"I started smoking. I've been cold turkey for the week I've been away. Not like you'd give a shit."

"Of course I give a shit Dick I'm your Dad!" Dick's eyes widened and he stared at Bruce's deep blue eyes. Guardian. Bruce was his parental guardian. He had never said anything that was different. It was always Dick who called him Dad from time to time. "Y-you just said you were my Dad," Dick stuttered.

"Yes, why would you think any-" This time Bruce was cut off by a tight hug. He needed a hug from his father figure. He'd needed it for a long time. "Richard," Bruce started. Dick tensed up at the use of his full name. Only Damian used it as a term of endearment. "I'm proud of you and thank you. I appreciate you more a lot than you think."