"You were a spicy little - uh - demon with the - uh - bleach blonde haaaair!" Blitzø sang both horribly. Moxxie had his ear holes covered, Loona sat in the middle looking annoyed at the imp's singing, and Millie had the window down, smiling out.

"Fieeendin' for that semen when I caught your stare..." Y/n joined in from the passenger seat with her acoustic guitar, a lot better than Blitzø.

"Thooought it might be love, but you went -"

"OH, SHIT! Fuck!" He slammed on the breaks, turned off the radio, and glared at the license plate of the car parked in the parking spot he was going for: SUCK-4-LIFE "Oh, you suck for life, do ya?!" He pulled out a megaphone, shouting at the pink car, "LISTEN UP, YOU UNORIGINAL PINK CUM DUMP! YOU HAVE THREE GODDAMN SECONDS TO GET YOUR TITS OUT OF MY PARKING SPOT!"

Heels clicked out onto the pavement, a tall succubus turning to the I.M.P car, popping a bubble with her chewing gum.

"Oh, shit!" Blitzø lowered the megaphone, gaping. "Verosika?!"

"Blitzo."

"Hot damn!" was Y/n's response when are saw her, lowering a pair of sunglasses that she was suddenly wearing to the bridge of her nose.

"I should have known you'd be here. I could smell fish for miles, which is odd. Because, I believe the nearest ocean is..." He fell out and onto his face, taking in a deep sniff."THREE RINGS DOWN!"

"And I should have known you'd be here when I heard the amber alerts." She glanced at the passenger seat at Y/n, who was still scoping her out. "New bitch?"

"No, she's my girlfriend," Blitzø replied snuggly, arms crossed with a cocky smirk, head turned.

"Really? 'Cause it looks like she's more interested in this."

"Yeah because monogamy's boring af! So they let your fat ass outta rehab? I can see you're still a drunken whore, clutching onto that Beelzejuice bottle like it's the last cock in Hell!"

She flipped her hair, scoffing. "They let me out because I'm still famous. And rehab is for sad, loser wash-ups." She took a swing, then wiped her lips with her thumb. "So, your sister says hi."

He marched to her, teeth barred, changing the subject. "Why are you parkin' here?! This is the ONLY parking spot my company has! So take your tampon race car somewhere else!"

"Actually, prick, it has my name on it." She pointed to the ground. I.M.P was crossed out and Verosika was spray-painted instead. "I'm doing a bit of freelance for one of the infinitely more successful companies in the building..."

Loona peeked out the window, mouth open. "No way..."

"...and they wanted to have me come in this week to lead their team during spring break."

"A WEEK?! No, no, you are NOT parking here for a fuckin' week!"

Verosika bent over with a condescending smirk, taking off her sunglasses, hands on her knees. "Aww, you mad, Blitzo? You gonna run off, leaving your new girl-toy to pay for the hotel room, steal her car and run -"

"- run three rings to Wrath and max MY credit cards on shitty horse riding lessons?!" he finished along, pinching the bridge of his nose-like structure. "Goddamnit whore, you will NOT let that go!"

"Choke on a sandpaper cock." She flipped him off and walked towards the building, not noticing Loona lower her head in her presence.

"HOLD ON! You better move that pussy wagon right now, or I'm gonna -"

A large hellhound loomed over him and growled. "You'll what?"

"Or I'll...uh..." he stuttered. "Uh, I - I'll call HR."

Silence, then all three began to cackle at the thought.

"Anyway, meet my new hellhound, Vortex. Unlike you, he actually does his job well." She left with Vortex, glaring behind her and flipping Blitzø off once more. "Ta-ta, fuck stain."

He groaned, mumbling, "Ugh, I wasted so much time with a bag of holes like that."

Y/n got out of the car, watching Verosika go while she took her place next to Blitzø. "So. Since when do you know Verosika Mayday?"

"Huh? Oh, yeah. Her, yeah. We dated."

"Was it before or after are became a pop star?" Millie asked.

Moxxie swung the door open and got out, Loona pushing him so she could get out. "You dated a popstar?!"

"Okay, why are you all acting like that's such a shock? I'm dating a future star right now."

"Yeah, but it's Verosika Mayday?" Loona insisted. "Who's a current star???"

Millie shrugged, agreeing, "Honestly, I'm surprised Y/n is datin' you."

"I just...is she blind?" Moxxie asked, scratching his head. "Suffering some sort of brain damage?"

"Watch it," Y/n warned.

"Okay, look, you are all making this into a way bigger deal than it needs to be. I don't pry into your stupid personal lives."

"You do that all the time, sir!"

"Come on, you kinda do that."

"You totally do that."

"Sorry, Blitzy, can't really argue that."

"What was sex with her like?" Millie asked, grinning lazily.

"Millie!" Moxxie scolded.

"Probably fuckin' ecstacy."

"Ma'am!"

"What? She's a hot popstar."

"Yeah, you'd wanna know what sex with Michael Crawford was like," Millie said.

Moxxie opened his mouth to protest, then closed it. "Touché."

"Okay, look, let's just drop it! Millie, j - find a temporary spot for that truck." He threw her the keys and she ran around to get in. "Okay, Loonie, Moxxie, girly? Let's go handle this shit."

-

"Do you think they saw me?!" Loona freaked when they got out of the elevator. "Fuck! I did my makeup shitty today!"

"Loon, hon, you always look good," Y/n encouraged with a smile.

"No, she looks perfect and has a heart like her mom!" Blitzø gushed, looking at both of them with big, shining eyes.

"Shut up, Da -" Loona stopped when she saw Blitzø with the same look now amplified, mouth open in a huge smile. She pushed him to the ground. "Ugh! Blitzø!" She stepped over him, checking herself in a small mirror, accidentally bumping into the taller, darker hellhound. "Oof!" She began to flush as soon as she saw him. "Oh. Whoa."

Y/n was busy helping Blitzø up and promptly being thrown down by him again to notice what was going on. But Blitzø did and his adoring fatherly smile turned instead to a look of shock seeing Loona with this hellhound. He gasped when he noticed her tail was wagging and stood firmly between them, his arms out, facing Vortex. "Hi, big man. Where's your bitch-bag of an employer?"

"She's in her office," he said, motioning towards a door with her initials spray-painted on it. It was the I.M.P office. "There wasn't room on the second floor, so they rented one here on this one. It's cheaper."

"Oh, COME ON!"

"Sorry, man," he said before walking off, leaving Blitzø to glare at the door.

"Oh, no you don't, bitch."

Hearing his frustration, Moxxie approached and offered, "Sir...how about you let me go in and try to reason with her? I don't really listen to what's classified as 'pop genre' music, so her status to me is name recognition alone. In my opinion, her music is a bit derivative of -"

"Moxxie, shut the fuck up!"

"Ugh, I'll go in with you," Y/n said. "I mean, I'm the musician here. Plus she's hot."

Blitzø gave her an unamused look. "I'm sorry what?"

"Alrighty then." He took the taller woman's hand and pulled her in, where Blitzø watched their silhouettes.

"Hello, Miss Verosika, was it? We work for I.M.P, and it is actually rather important for us to retain the singular parking space we were assigned, because -"

"Aw, look at the little one. He's got a wittle bow tie!" one of Verosika's employees snickered.

"Please don't condescend me, ma'am. I -"

"Want a kissy, little guy?" a male asked.

"A kind offer, but...I'm married."

"What about you, girlie?"

"I don't think my boyfriends would like that."

"Hey, speaking of, why don't you send a little message from me back to your limp-dick...boyfriend?"

They rose up, ready to assault both of them, freaking Moxxie out, but the unamused Y/n showing no reaction. "Ma'am, this is rape -"

"Don't touch that!" Moxxie screamed.

Blutzø ran to the window, pressing his hands against it. "Babe, Moxxie, don't let her access any of your holes!"

Moxxie ran back without Y/n, panting. "I...I gotta go...lie down," he said before falling on his face.

"Oh, this won't STAND!" He kicked the doors open, ready to mutilate anyone if they were on Y/n. Thank Satan, no one was. "ALRIGHT, YOU CU - *beep* THAT'S IT! If you're gonna be shitty to my employees AND my girlfriend, then I challenge you to a fuckin'...challenge! Fuck, I said that twice..."

"Mmmm...is this imp boy starting a demon duel?" one of Verosika's followers asked.

"I think he is! What's the game, Blitzo?" she asked, leaning down to his level.

"Every year, you STD spreaders go up topside for easy pickin's while spring break is a prime time for crime of all kinds! So I bet... you succu-bitches can't fuck as many people as we can off by the end of the day."

They started to laugh, until they noticed Blitzø's cold stare. Y/n, behind him, put her hand in the middle of his horns and her other hand on her hip, which jutted out. "Oh, you're serious?" She whispered the next part solely to Blitzø. "Game on, bitch."

-

Behind Blitzø and Y/n was an easel of drawings Y/n had made, crude scribbles lining the white canvas gloriously.

"Alright, shut your assholes!" Blitzø yelled towards the employees sitting at the table with a pointer in hand. "Here's how we're gonna do this shit! First, we find a fuck-ton of clients."

The first drawing was I.M.P standing together with imps and bags of money.

"We portal up. We have our fun murder time as per usual."

They were snapped to Earth and looked off a bunch of humans with guns.

"We pile all the bodies into a big fuckin' canoe. We push said canoe into some water."

The S.S. Cum Gutter was pushed into a lake with all the dead bodies on it.

"We light it on fire to attract the sharks and eagles 'n shit. Maybe a goose, too! Fuck it! They come and eat the bodies, we win the bet..."

After they were eaten, I.M.P cheered with Y/n forcing a party hat onto Loona.

"We rub it in that sloppy bitch's drunken whore-ass face..."

They all flipped a much bustier Verosika off, who burst into tears.

"Do you have... any questions?" he asked, yeeting the pointer out the window.

"Uh, yeah," Moxxie said, then gave Y/n an unamused look. "Ma'am, why would you agree to draw that nonsense."

"Because I'm gettin' paid for it."

"That wasn't a question," Blitzø said with an eye-roll, approaching Moxxie.

"That wasn't a plan!"

He put his arm around Moxxie. "I'm sorry, but that was a flawless presentation of what we should do, Mox. It's not my fault you got a smooth little brain upstairs."

"A what now?"

"He's calling you a moron," Y/n said, already making paper airplanes out of the drawings and throwing them across the room.

"God, why don't you learn to take criticism, you talentless baby-dicked troll?!" Blitzø yelled, jabbing him in the chest.

Angered,Moxxie climbed onto the table and fired back with, "Well why doesn't SHE -" He thrusted a finger at Y/n. "- take an art class?!"

"Why don't YOU see how EXPENSIVE THEY ARE?!" Y/n screamed, telepathically picking him up and throwing him back into the chair, at which point Blitzø was climbing on him, pupils uncharacteristically tiny.

"Why don't you say something about her again and see what happens?"

"Hey, is there any way I can come with you guys this time?" Loona broke the tension, bored of watching the whole thing go down.

"Absolutely not, I forbid it. Not gonna happen. Sorry, sweetie. Spring break is no place for young, vulnerable goth girls. You know the kind of FREAKS up there who'd drool all over you!"

Everyone looked out of the screen and at the reader in disappointment and annoyance. Especially the author in the background, an irl vulnerable goth girl.

"Well, I can blend in with humans easy enough. Just let me tag along."

Blitzø froze. "Wait, say that again."

"I can...blend in...?" she shrugged inquisitively.

"Do you have a human disguise?" Millie asked.

"You four have been screwing around on Earth this whole fucking time...without human disguises?! Y/n, aren't you a SIN?!"

Before she could answer, Blitzø cut in. "Okay new plan! Y/n, take a note!"

She took a paper and pencil, glad she would have another paper airplane after drawing on it.

"Loonie can help lure the humans to us, and we'll take care of the rest."

Y/n put the new picture on the easel. "Okay, how about that?"

"Flawless logic," Millie praised as Y/n got to folding.

"I think you're missing the biggest issue, sir," Moxxie interjected. "Isn't it crucial to have a client who demands enough kills to win this bet? We aren't just going up to massacre!"

"I got that covered, Mox."

-

Spring Break Victim; 50% Off!

On the flyer was a picture of three horses: an earth pony, a unicorn, and an alicorn, the latter two being drawn larger, and love-hearts all over. As of added last minute were a bunch of dead bodies.

"Now...we wait."

Moxxie, losing the will to live by the minute, had his hand in a facepalm position. "Sir. There is no way we are going to get enough clients by the end of the day with one fanficy, bad grammar flyer!"

But Y/n was already taking sheets of information from a line of demons, who had seen the flyer. Blitzø elbowed Moxxie before standing next to Y/n, his arm around her waist. "Now who's first?"

-

At Spring Break, humans were casually chilling at the beach, some talking, orders just relaxing. Unbeknownst to them was I.M.P under a dock, hiding in the rocks.

"Now, remember, we can't be seen, alright? And loose shots will likely cause a panic, so Loona can help with leading targets to a better spot to off 'em. You got the list, Loonie?"

Y/n held out the list for her to sniff up and down, doglike. "Got it," she said once she finished. In a blue light, she went from hellhound to teenage goth girl, white hair covering one of her eyes, body skinny.

"Ohhhhh, Loonie, look at you," Blitzø said in awe. "You look...downright awful! I am so proud. Now fetch!"

Y/n threw the rolled-up list and Loona ran after it on all fours. Picking it up, she got back on her legs and scanned the beach, the scent of the victim taking her to a man with sunglasses. She approached, pointed at herself, then pointed at an alleyway. She took him, leaning against a wall. Just before he could reach out for her, Y/n shot him in the back of the head, immediately causing him to fall forward, dead.

"That's my baby," she stated, cocking the gun. Blitzø peeked out, giving his daughter a thumbs-up.

-

A blond man ran into a noose that was pulled on him by Blitzø when he was trying to run to Loona.

-

Another tried to kiss Loona, Millie kicking him off the roof.

-

Another was killed by a falling flower pot.

-

Three women were killed, one by Blitzø with a knife, one by Millie with a spiked baseball bat, and one by Y/n with a gun.

-

Y/n was stuck with trying to get all the bodies to fit in a bag, hopping on it. "How many people is this?" she asked, exasperated. "I don't think we can fit any more."

"Nine," Blitzø answered. "I like to see that waily snatch orgasm that many -"

"Alright, Spring Breakers!" came a voice they unfortunately recognized. Verosika and the others were on a huge stage in the ocean, human disguises on. "Y'all ready to get fucked up and make some BITCHIN' BAD CHOICES?!"

Everyone cheered, a random man ripping his shirt off, Verosika tattooed on his chest. "VEROSIKA!"

"This is your final boarding call. All aboard ~"

FUCK YOU BLITZO

Y/n was unable to take her eyes off of the succubus, despite feeling the great of her boyfriend's rage right next to her. She ran a hand over her black hair to look more presentable, legs pressed together as she and Verosika caught each other's look. The succubus winked, Y/n returning it with a flirty smirk.

Verosika:
Pack your bags
Sun's out
Take a vacay, babe
Take it straight to Bonetown

Around them, the humans began making out , rolling their disgusting bodies around in the sand. Y/n tried to grab Blitzø, but he slapped her hands away, glaring intently at his ex-girlfriend.

Verosika:
V-time, free time, baby relax
Self-care, no hair, Brazilian wax
Hornt up succu-bus to the beach
Catch some rays while catching some D

"GodDAMMIT! That bitch started her goadish mating call! Now she's gonna win all these sex maniacs! We gotta pick things up, guys! AND NO Y/N I AM NOT FUCKING YOU."

"Ugh, fine," she pouted, then smirked, pulling his body closer to hers. "Then at least dance with me!"

He yelled at the suddenness of being pulled around. Near the spot they were at, a blond man puked. "He in the list, Loonie?!" Blitzø yelled over from where he was.

"Huh? Yeah...I - I think so." But she was watching a disguised Vortex on the stage.

"Good!" He pulled away successfully from Y/n and pulled out an ax, jumping at the man, too drunk to register what was going on.

"Oh, whoa! What are you? A leprechaun?"

"Yeah, pretty cool, huh?" He buried the ax in his skull, a clean cut right down the middle. "But you sure as shit ain't gonna tell nobody! Alright, next one Loonie, c'mon! ...Loonie? Wait, where...?" Seeing her previous spot empty, he looked around in a panic. "Wha - wha - wh - WHERE'S MY BABY?!"

"Uh, Blitzy?" Y/n pointed at Loona, approaching Vortex nervously. His face snapped to anger, Y/n trying to pull him away. "She's an adult, Blitzø, it's fine."

"Off," he warned, the taller demon immediately letting go.

Loona checked her makeup while two men making out fell to the ground. A bikini top hit her in the head.

Someone tried to run to Verosika, stopped by Vortex, who smashed his face into the ground. Throwing off the bikini, Loona tried to walk over, stopped by a guy. She slapped him, then went back on her way to Vortex.

"Now who wants a piece of this?!" Verosika called out to the crowd once the song was finished, throwing out a bottle of Beelzejuice into the ocean. A catfish formed, becoming a monster.

-

Once close enough, Loona nervously swayed on her feet. "Hey...you..."

Vortex glanced in her direction, hands behind his back. "Oh, hey. You're the hound workin' for my boss' freaky ex."

"Yeah..." she chuckled, looking everywhere but at him. "Sorry if that's weird."

"It's cool. Her beef ain't mine. I'm not paid enough to care."

"Yeah! Yeah...I'm Loona."

"Okay." He playfully mimicked her nervousness. "I'm Vortex."

"That's hot," she blurted out, giving him a dreamy gaze. Catching herself, she added, "I mean, like, literally, y'know, 'cause vortexes...y'know, they give off heat. Probably. Right?" She bit her lip.

"Uh, yeah," he chuckled. "But my friends call me Tex."

"Oh, yeah? I wish I had friends. I mean... No, I mean, I don't... I... I don't have friends."

Instantly, Blitzø got his little red ass over and stood between them, glaring up at Vortex, while Y/n stood by Loona, who was growling lowly, watching Blitzø with a facepalm. "Am I...interrupting something?"

Nonchalantly, Vortex put his hands in his pockets, looking around casually. "Nah, man, just having a conversation."

"Conversation leads to HPV!" he insisted, jabbing the hellhound.

"Honey, I don't think it's that deep -"

"Not now sugar tits."

Behind some metal barrels, Moxxie and Millie watched, Moxxie sighing. "And we've lost them. It's looking like it's up to us to handle this list."

"Hell yeah! Team M&M, gettin' shit done! Makin' the moneys!"

They ran off into the sunset, murdering people in couple's goals.

-

"Y/n, get Blitzø the fuck out of here! He's gonna get us all into shit!"

"Loons, if it was that easy, I would've by now."

"I just wanted to see what was so important that you'd be distracted from your job," Blitzø cut in.

"What, I can't have a break?"

"We have a PARKING SPOT on the line!"

"Hey, dude. Why don't you chill out?" Vortex suggested, still calm.

"Why don't YOU stay out of it?! Okay, this is our business! Literally!" He held up pictures of murder equalling money equaling him and Y/n riding a Stolas horse - yet another Y/n masterpiece.

"Fuck, Blitzø!" Loona yelled, tugging at her bangs. "Why can't you stay out of my face for, like, five minutes?!"

"Because, I adopted you! And that should mean something!"

"Oh, what does it matter?! You're not my real dad! I was almost eighteen!" she argued.

"It still counts!"

"Well, it shouldn't! I didn't need you then, asshole! I don't, now!"

Y/n looked between them, unsure of what to do, but saw the obvious hurt he tried to mask with crossed arms the statement had caused Blitzø. "Blitzø, maybe we should get back to work?"

"Yeah. We should."

"Wait, Blitzø, I -" Loona tried.

"Enjoy your break, Loonie. I'm gonna go kill something."

Once he was gone, Y/n put her hand on Loona's shoulder. "He'll get over it, honey."

"Yeah, I know..."

A moment of quiet, then Y/n said, "He isn't your dad, but he does love you. He's just...shit at showing it." She pulled out a comically sized hammer from her back. "Welp! Back to the old grind!" She ran off, slaughtering everyone in her way.

"Ugh..."

Vortex took Y/n's place on Loona's shoulder. "Damn, girl. That's was savage. You okay?"

She blushed at his touch, which was quite noticeable on her white skin, the color having perfectly transferred from her fur. "Yeah, I'm fine. Y/n's right, he'll get over it. He always does."

"Well, even if she's in your corner, I'm glad you could stick up for yourself. Mmm! Takes guts."

"Thanks."

-

In a crazy high frenzy, Y/n slashed open a beer keg, guzzling it down until she tasted flesh. Out of the hole squeezed out Moxxie, burping while excess beer spilled out, Y/n lapping it up like a dog.

"Moxxie!"

He saw his wife over him, slurring his words with a drunken grin. "Millieee! Hiiii! Hey. Hey, when did you get four heads? I wanna kiss 'em." He reached up for her, trying to kiss her, Millie shaking her head with a tired smile. She picked him up as the giant monster came up from the water, crushing a few people while the crowd ran away screaming. "Ooooh! Fish!"

The monster wrapped its tongue around Moxxie and pulled him up, ready to swallow him. "Hehehe...weeeeee..." was the last thing he said before he was swallowed.

Already knowing what was coming, Y/n killed one of the humans and threw Millie the cocktail he was holding, Millie already having lit a cloth on fire. She threw it at the monster and knifed him. Opening the jaws, she saw Moxxie still in his throat, punching at the uvula. She reached out, Moxxie reaching back, only to give her a high-five. She grabbed him and cut the tongue, then let him go, Moxxie spreading his arms to 'fly' before landing in Y/n's arms. "Heeeeyyyy girl, wassuuuuuupp?"

"You smell like beer and horny."

Inside the mouth still, Millie punched the remainder of the tongue, wrestling even as she got spat out.

"I love that women," Moxxie slurred with a dopey, lovestruck smile, his tail shaping into a heart.

"Oh, she totally pegs you, doesn't she?" Blitzø blurted out.

"No duh, you just figure this out?" Y/n held him protectively as she watched Millie punch the stomach, now inside of it, before slicing it open and walking out to her group.

"Oh yeah, way to show off, Mills!"

"Is Mox okay?'

Y/n held him out to Millie, letting her take him in her arms. "This is funny!" he grinned, still speaking drunkenly. "I'm so...drinky."

She giggled, hugging Moxxie.

"Okay, this is too wholesome for my liking."

"Come on, Blitzy, they're cute."

"So are corgis, but you don't see anyone defendin' them."

"Blitzo." Verosika appeared with her clique behind her.

"Oh, perfect. That must be the whores!"

"That was handled rather... obvious...don't you think?"

"I don't think this belonged to any of us," Millie cut in, throwing the flask back at Verosika. "Would be a shame if anyone found out you guys were behind a giant monster fish in the human world."

Moxxie giggled, slurring, "Oh, Satan, you guys are gonna be so...FUCKED."

His laughing irritated Verosika, who tried to defend herself. "Yeah, well...you three nasty-ass gremlins and your little girlfriend will be in shit for not being in disguises!"

Ignoring her, Moxxie faceplanted into the sand. "A human called me a opossum...I am not a opossum!"

Y/n squirmed up to Verosika, touching her hip to hers. "C'mon, V, we could keep this a little secret, we're good girls and boys...but maybe Mr. Boss could have his parking spot back? Hmmm?"

Blushing, pouting, she begrudgingly said, "Fine."

"WE FUCKIN' WON!"

"FUCK YEAH!"

"IN YOUR FACE, BITCH!"

Verosika lowered her voice, speaking only for Y/n to hear. "If you ever wanna upgrade, call me," she said, slipping her a stub of paper that she quickly hid. "Tex!"

His gaze flickered to Verosika before going back to Loona with a kind smile. "Well...guess it's time to bounce. But, hey, if you're ever down to party, I'll give you a ring sometime."

"Really?!" she asked excitedly before reeling it back. "I mean, heh...yeah. Yeah."

"Yeah! My girlfriend throws a ton of crazy hound parties!"

The smile faltered from Loona as she forced out, "Nice. Can't wait for my first one."

"Heh. Let's get you some friends, girl." He gave her a small punch before going back with Verosika, letting Loona slump over, dejected.

The portal was open, Millie already taking Moxxie through. "Come on, Loonie Toony! Let's go back and park our fat fuckin' car in our fat fuckin' space!"

She sighed and went backwards through the portal. Blitzø followed, flipping Verosika off on his way in, her eye twitching. Y/n blew a kiss, then swan-dived through.

-

"PUT YOUR HANDS UP, YOU SICK DEVIANTS!" the police screamed at Verosika and her gang.

She put her hands up with a sigh. "Alright, sluts. Get ready to suck a lot of pig dick."

Everyone groaned, but followed her lead.

-

Blitzø:
You were the spicy little demon
With the bleach blonde hair

Y/n:
Fiendin' for some semen
When I caught your stare

Blitzø:
Thought it might be love
But you went too far

Y/n:
Fucked all of my friends
And BLEW UP MY CAR -

Blitzø, Y/n:
Lit me on fire
Made me watch rom-coms
Made a secret sex tape and
Showed it to my mom
You were a bitch kinda generally
Now I'm a wet wild stallion
And I'm running free

You stepped on my nuts
And you tore me apart
Slapped up my booty
And tangled my farts
Cut off my dick
When you shattered my heart
But it grew back twice as long
Mustang dong

"Oh, my god! I just went through puberty twice!"