I felt full. Too full to eat, too full to move, too full to breathe but I did all that anyway because I didn't like not doing them. I had woken up the day after the carnival with a splitting headache and a fever, the stomach pains followed a few hours later but the chills didn't come until the evening.

Typhoid, just as mom had suspected. That was what the test reports said and immediately I began receiving treatment along with a lot of unnecessary care. The drugs weren't an issue, it was the constant knocks on my door followed by hot food and 'how are you feeling?'

I couldn't recall a time when I had fallen ill but I could easily say I had never been as babied as I was. Mom spoon fed me for the first day, she even offered to bath me but there was no way that was happening. Marcel took up my chores without waiting to be asked and Kunle was kind enough to tune down his Christmas carols.

It was the last day of the year and although I wasn't feeling as good as I would've liked, I was determined to not act like it, that is why I decided to join them that afternoon for lunch instead of having it brought to my room. Mom had her eyes on me the whole time, she'd have eaten better if the food had been smeared on my face.

"Are you sure you don't want me to stay?" She asked again.
"You said the meeting with the pastor is important". I reminded her.
"It is but I can come back after that, we can have our own vigil here". I saw the look on Marcel's face and expected his protest to be flying out soon but he was smarter.

"But it won't be the same, I know how much you've been anticipating it so, go to church, you and dad. I'll stay back and look after browny". His concerned expression looked legit enough but as usual, only my mom was falling for it. Kunle's and I knew he just wanted to escape the new year's eve vigil.

"Amanda, will that be okay?"
I pretended to ponder on it, avoiding Marcel's eyes for a few seconds before nodding.
"Okay".

They left the house a couple minutes before 5pm for their meeting with the pastor and it was only a short countdown before Marcel lost his home training.
"So. Jumanji or Avengers?"
"Jumanji".
He went on to put avengers anyway and I didn't have the strength to argue. Halfway through the movie, I got up and he looked at me.

"Are you going to throw up or shit yourself? I will not be cleaning your vomit or packing your.. "
"It's just headache, I'm going to take panadol and lie down. Awon nanny".
He grinned as I walked off and returned to the movie.

Falling asleep was hard with the headache and chills but the painkillers acted quickly. The sleep was restless, I could feel myself tossing and sweating, I had turned off the fan and covered myself all the way up to my neck.
It was restlessness that woke me, it was the weird feeling of having someone else in the room.

It was dark outside and the light in my room had been turned on. I turned towards my reading table when I heard something drop.
"You are awake". Christopher Lawal said with a creepy smile that had me jolting to a sitting position.

"What are you doing here?" I demanded, pulling the blanket that I had pushed aside to cover my bare legs.
"Just looking". The smile widened.
"Where is Marcel?"
"He left to get something, should be gone awhile. Do you know he got this from me?" He raised the book I had left open on the table, the one Marcel gave me for Christmas.

"It belonged to my sister but she doesn't have time for books anymore. If I had known he was getting it for you I'd have signed it with hugs and kisses".
The person standing in my room was new to me. I thought I knew Chris' type but with every passing second, he continued to prove me wrong and it scared me.

"Get out". I put all the confidence I wasn't feeling behind those words but he wasn't fazed, instead, he took a seat at the foot of my bed.
"I think Henrietta is fun but you already know that".
"You also think she is a toy". I accused and he laughed.
"That too but I think you are real".
"I am a person and so is she".

"Yeah, a person I want". He placed his hand on my leg over the blanket and immediately, I flinched and kicked.
My body was shutting down, I was supposed to be recovering but it felt like the fever was gathering momentum. My body was beginning to not feel like mine anymore, I felt trapped.

"Get out of my room Chris, before I break your bones". Even I didn't believe myself, that is why I wasn't surprised that he just chuckled and moved closer.
"I never paid you any mind, Amanda. Then it became hard not to because everyone else was doing it. I like you and I think we'll be good together, don't you?"

His hand was slowly advancing up my leg and all I found myself doing was pull away just as slowly. All I could think was; it is happening again.

"Leave me alone". I attempted to push his hand off my body but he only swatted my arm away, the blanket along with it.
"Chris". I hated how weak I sounded but everything felt too real and Abike wasn't here to save me.
"Yes? What do you want?"

My back hit the headboard and I could feel my stomach rumbling. My thighs burned where both his hands gripped them. His face was close to mine, too close for me to breathe.
Suffocated.
He was pushing me down to a place I never wanted to return to, to a person I swore I was never going to be again. I pushed back, hard, with strength I didn't know I had.

"What the hell?!" He yelled as he fell on the bed with unanticipated force.
I got up the same time he did and delivered another push before he could regain his balance.
I watched as the contents of my table clattered to the ground from the pressure of his weight.

"What is going on here?"
Everything paused at the sound of his voice and stayed that way until the wheels in his head stopped spinning. I saw when realization found him, his forehead creased painfully and his eyes avoided mine, they settled on his bestfriend instead.

"Bro.." I heard his voice but I couldn't look at him, my eyes stayed on Marcel.
"I wasn't going to do anything serious, just..."
It was only because I had been staring at him that I saw his fist clench and his feet cover up the short distance between them.

Christopher Lawal had been expecting something but it obviously wasn't being dealt a hard punch by his best friend.
"Get out". It sounded like an order but I knew it was a warning.
"Get the fuck out and never show your face here again".

The olive skin around Chris' left jaw had turned red but not as red as his angry eyes. They stood there glaring at each other for a while before Chris left, slamming every door in his path.
He took his time turning around but his eyes didn't try to find me.

"I'm sorry". I barely heard him say as I dashed to the toilet to discard everything I'd had for lunch.

I kept retching even when nothing came out anymore. I wanted it to stop but not yet, I had to get everything out, everything his slimy hands might have snuck into my body. I washed my face without looking at the mirror because I didn't want to see who I had turned into.

My room was empty when I got back. No one was in there but it felt like the room itself was turning against me. It was supposed to be my safe abode but when I caught sight of that book by Chimamanda, I knew I was never going to be safe.

It hurt, everywhere did and this time, I felt it. That is why sliding to the floor, I let myself express it.

---------------------------------------------------------
Whew... This one was kinda hard.

I had already posted this chapter before I saw the news online about a lady raped and murdered in a CHURCH!  I'm sorry but I cannot be quiet about this savagery. Forget fiction for a while, these are the kind of things I'm trying to draw attention to. The society is not safe for anyone but especially women and if you can't see that then f you.
Please, do not condone rape or any form of sexual assault, speak against it, do more if you can and if you can't sympathize with the victims then be quiet.

Anyway, this book is nearing its end.(Is it too soon to say that?)
There aren't a lot of chapters left, about five or so. Prepare your farewell speeches.
I will be introducing another book though that is going to be very different👇

The prologue will be out today but updates won't begin until this book is finished. So, you can check that out if you want to embark on another journey with me😊