Lia was positive she would never grow tired of New York in December. Sure, she had to bundle up in extra layers and the mountains of snow could be a bitch to trudge through, but it was ethereal, especially on a day where there were only snow flurries and the sun was still beaming. She was hoping some of that magic would lend itself to the less than ethereal conversation she'd be having with her ex that afternoon.

They had been talking here and there since she had last seen him. She wasn't as pissed at him as she had been when he dropped by her apartment. He had apologized for what had happened with Justin. Unbeknownst to Lia, Justin had played soccer in high school, like Ayden. Their teams had crossed paths and when everything happened with Ally, rumors floated. Although Lia had been upset at the time, it was just a horrible misunderstanding.

Ayden was back with his family for the winter break which led to Lia walking the familiar streets of Cobble Hill, like she had done so many times since freshman year. She sent him a text that she had arrived. There were so many memories associated with the neighborhood: nighttime walks, make out sessions on the stoop of his building. A smile grew on her face as the memory of she and Hunter sneaking out in the middle of the night to rekindle her relationship popped into her mind. She had been so nervous that night - a feeling that was eerily familiar in the present.

She leaned against his midnight blue Corolla that was parked out on the curb as she waited for him to come down. She hated the feeling in her stomach she still got whenever she saw him. Ayden always had a suave way about him that was effortless and it made his crooked smile always so damn endearing. His confidence was one of the first things that attracted Lia to him and what brought out her own insecurities.

"What do you got there?" Ayden nodded his head towards the items in Lia's hands as he walked out of the building. Lia immediately took note of the fraternity letters on his sweatshirt, an indicator of how both of their lives had changed since they were together.

"My mom made them." Ayden let out a hearty laugh at the clear sarcastic tone of Lia's statement as he accepted the sweets, along with the coffee Lia had also brought, with thanks.

"I stopped at Five Estrellas on the way here," Lia referenced her favorite local bakery as he opened the cardboard takeaway box to see the Coquito Tres Leches Cake the two had devoured the past two holiday seasons. Ayden took off a piece with his fingers and popped it into his mouth as Lia continued. "I know how much Ian and Gemma enjoyed it last year." She purposely mentioned his younger siblings when she saw the way he was eyeing her. "Are they upstairs?"

Ayden shook his head, "My folks took them up to Rockefeller."

"Are you still recovering from last year?" She teased, grateful for the needed ice breaker, as Ayden led the two over to a nearby bench to sit down, wiping off the remnants of frost before they sat.

Ayden responded with a half hearted laugh, "Hey, my life literally flashed before my eyes!"

Lia rolled her eyes at Ayden's dramatic recount of the memory of him ice skating headfirst into an inflatable snowman that past winter. Lia had laughed so hard she'd nearly peed her pants.

"And I remember being the one who sat and watched half of the third season of 'The Office' with you that night while you recovered."

"If I remember correctly, we did a little more than just watch 'The Office' that night."

Lia looked down at the street pavement, not wanting to give Ayden the satisfaction of seeing her blushing cheeks. She had walked herself straight into that one. She had never gone as far with any other guy physically as she had gone with Ayden. She'd thought he'd end up being her first on all accounts, but life had other plans.

"I think you hit your head too hard on the ice." She responded dryly, although the two of them ended up laughing at the awkward turn of the conversation. It was one of the things Lia had always appreciated about Ayden: he always had a way of making her feel at ease.

"How was your trip to California?"

"Good." Lia replied, her fingers tightly clutched around her caramel macchiato to provide some warmth, "Hunter and I always have a great time together and it was nice to have a few days away to figure things out. Speaking of," After a few beats, Lia addressed the elephant in the air, "Why did you come over the other day? And don't give me the crap about your mom sending you over."

"You caught me," Ayden replied before he took a sip of his coffee. He fiddled with the sleeve of his cup. "I was a real ass to you, wasn't I?"

Of all the statements that Lia had mentally prepared for, that was not one of them.

"Not our entire relationship... or at least I don't think so." The way he spoke was as if Lia wasn't right next to him. As if she was just a fly on the wall. "But in the end, when you said I didn't care if you left for school. You were right."

Lia didn't know how to respond or what exactly his point was. It had been months since they had broken up, which was exactly what she said to him.

"I saw the pictures of you at your dad's walk of fame ceremony." He finally looked over towards her, his voice soft,  "You looked really happy."

The stubborn part of Lia had to keep herself from rolling her eyes. She had told her father in the past that he was being overprotective with his rules about keeping his children out of the limelight. The one time she is allowed out into the Hollywood sphere, and it comes back to bite her in the ass... twice.

"I am happy." Lia had done a lot of work to get herself to the point she was at. The recognition of that actually made her feel really proud of herself. "But there were a million cameras at the event. Of course I would look happy." 

"It wasn't just that," Ayden lightly shook his head, "Even from a distant camera, I could see it in your eyes. And it made me realize I hadn't seen you like that in a while. And so when I went to your place, part of me did want to talk to you about getting back together."

Lia felt a lump in her throat. She took a beat before responding, swallowing it down to keep her composure, "What stopped you?"

"When you opened the door." He replied, "I know you weren't expecting to see me, but your eyes." He paused with a deep breath and Lia instinctively put her hand on his fingers that were still fidgetinging with the sleeve.

The two sat in a comfortable silence. Lia moved over closer towards Ayden, the small act reminded her body of the frigid temperatures they were engulfed by. Throughout their relationship, it was usually Ayden who was comforting Lia and wiping her tears away "My abuelo says this saying a lot. 'Lavar cerdos con jabón es perder tiempo y jabón.' which basically translates to don't waste time washing a pig with soap." She lightly laughed, grateful she saw a smile creep onto Ayden's face, the squeeze between their fingers tightened. "My point is, our relationship wasn't a waste of time. And we both did things that hurt each other. And we shouldn't get back together, but you'll always be my first love, Ayden."

Ayden's eyes met Lia's. She could see the tears in his eyes even if he quickly blinked them away. "Mine too, Em."

Normally, she would protest at the detested nickname, but hearing him say it brought a weird sense of comfort. It reminded Lia of her days as a freshman at Hunter and the early days of their relationship. She had changed so much as a person since then. At times, her freshman year felt like the longest year of her life and, yet, she couldn't believe it had been over two years since. For a conversation she had been dreading for days, Lia felt such peace about her decision. It seemed that that was a recurring feeling lately and she was enjoying it.

Lia nudged his body with her elbow before she leaned her head against his shoulder. Time felt like it was standing still. Maybe they'd become friends. Maybe this was the last time they ever spoke. But, in that moment, the two remained in a comfortable silence, yet again, equally thankful for the time that they'd shared.

The sky was beginning to darken as the day came to a close.  Lia looked towards the subway station, knowing she had a long ride ahead up to Washington Heights.  She realized she felt at peace with things.  At peace with Ayden, and with the prospect of going to college.  She knew she'd miss her family and New York like crazy, but the possibilities that came with a move to California were exciting.

"Well, I better get going," she told Ayden, tucking her hands into her coat pocket.  When she looked at his face, she was afraid he might try to kiss her.  Hopefully he knew better than that.  If he was considering it, he bit his lip and seemed to psych himself out.

"Okay," he told her, stepping back slightly.  "I'll see you around?"

"Sure," she told him, giving him a small smile.  Lia waved and walked toward the subway station.  She could sense that he was watching her go.

After several changeovers, Lia finally ascended the stairs at 181st.  After a short walk, she was home.  When Lia entered her family's apartment, Jay-Z was blasting as her father cooked one of the few meals he could make for the twins - mac and cheese and some peas.  Her mother sometimes complained that Lin got the kids riled up, and this was going to be one of those instances, she could tell.  They were laughing and cackling as they toddler-danced to the song as Lin rapped along.  Lia rolled her eyes as she started to take her coat off.  For most kids, walking in on their dad rapping would be completely cringeworthy, but she happened to have one of the best.

Lin noticed his oldest walk in and gave her a nod as he continued rapping and cooking.  Lia noticed Stella also doing the potty dance.  Knowing her little sister, she didn't want to stop when she was having so much fun.  She gently took her by the hand and danced for a few moments, then started to lead her towards the bathroom.

"You haven't had an accident in so long," Lia praised Stella as she led her down the hallway.  "You've gotta stop when it's time to go, even when you're having fun."

"I know," she agreed reluctantly.  "It's just hard."

Lia dropped her off at the bathroom and then disappeared to her own room to change into some sweats.  As she pulled her well-worn Hamilton zip up on her phone buzzed.  She smiled when she saw it was Justin.

"Hey, you," she greeted him, plopping down on her bed.

"Hey," she could tell he was smiling on the other end of the phone.  "How's your day been?"

"Oh, fine," she examined her cuticles, wondering if she should tell him about Ayden.  He didn't seem the jealous type, but it was hard to tell.  "Just got back from seeing Ayden.  He wanted to catch up."

"Yeah?" he asked, and didn't let on he was mad about it if he was.  "How's he?"

"He's fine," she told him.   "We just kind of talked about what we got out of our relationship.  You know, it's hard to hate someone you were with for so long.  I think we both learned what we needed to learn."

"Good, I guess," he replied, clearly a bit uncomfortable with the conversation.

"Yeah," she said.  "I guess I learned what I want and don't want in a partner."

"And what is it that you want?" Justin asked curiously.

Lia smiled.  "Someone I can talk to about important things," she began.  "And someone I can laugh with."

"Mmmhmm," said Justin.  "Know anyone like that?"

"Maybe," she teased, twirling some of her dark brown hair with her finger.  It was exciting what she had with Justin, but she was also at a crossroads in her life.  In six months she'd be heading west and they wouldn't see each other for months.  What did that mean for them?

"Hey, so I really liked it out in California," she told him.  "I think I might be leaning towards going to school out there."

"Really?" He asked, somewhat surprised.  Justin knew how close she was to her family and California was about the farthest she could go.  "UCLA?"

"Maybe," she said.  "There's another option on the table but I'm still mulling it over."

"That would be a big move," he pointed out.

"Yeah, but I think I'm ready," she told him.  "I really liked it when I visited Hunter and went to my dad's ceremony."

"Yeah," he said.  "We wouldn't be able to see each other."

"I know," she said, sighing.  "I really like you, Justin.  But I don't know.  I'm almost eighteen and I can't make decisions based on someone else, you know?"

"Yeah," he agreed.  They'd only known each other a few months after all.  He couldn't ask her to stay just because of him.  "But you'll be back in town tons won't you?"

"Of course," she agreed.  "I can't stay away from New York for long."

"Stella and Sebastian are gonna miss you like crazy," he pointed out.  Not to mention himself.

It was going to be hard for the twins to understand why their sister was no longer around.  They adored their older sister and it was hard to imagine being apart from them for so long.

"Yeah it's gonna be hard," she acknowledged.  "But they'll manage.  We have FaceTime and Zoom."

"Is Stella doing better?" He asked, knowing she could be somewhat challenging.

"Yeah, way better," she said.  "Her dance therapy really seems to be helping."

Her dad knocked on her bedroom door and poked his head in.  "Want any mac and cheese?"

She nodded and began to sit up.  "It's dinner time so I better go," she said.  "Wanna get together Friday night?"

They made plans for her to come see him down at NYU and they hung up.  Lia walked out to the dining room, where Stella and Sebastian had already been set up with their meals.  Lia dished herself out some mac and cheese and added some salad.  Her mother was working late tonight so Lia knew she'd need to help with the twins.  Stella already had cheese in her hair, despite having it pulled back in a ponytail.  It would definitely need to be bath time tonight.

"How was Ayden?" Lin asked as he sat down with his own plate.

"Oh, he was fine," she stabbed a few noodles with her fork.

"He didn't try to proposition you did he?" He asked, wondering of the boy's intentions.  Lin didn't want to get too much into her business, but it seemed she was better off without the kid.

"No," she grinned.  "He knows I'm with Justin now."

"We didn't scare him away did we?" He asked, recalling their recent dinner together.  Justin had seemed like a good enough guy.  Lin was curious to find out more about his past, but it seemed like he had good things going for him.

"Nah, he loved you guys," she told him.  Sebastian hadn't taken a bite of his dinner yet and was instead attempting to balance his spoon on his nose to make his sister laugh.  He stuck his nose up and pursed his lips together.

"Stewwa, wook!" he told his twin.  She giggled and looked at their dad, wondering if he would approve.

"Sebastian, eat please," Lin gently chided his son.  Sebastian grinned and jabbed his spoon into his plate of macaroni.  His son seemed to have a lot of his own characteristics - he was sensitive and caring.  They could already tell he was smart and funny.  Lin couldn't wait to see what his son would grow up to be.  For now, though, it was just fun to see him be a kid.

"I'm thinking of applying to Stanford," Lia told her father, wanting to gauge his reaction before she brought it up with her mother.

"That's a great school," he acknowledged, his mouth full of food.  He chewed and swallowed before going on.  "Is it too late to apply?"

"I don't think so," she said.

"I thought you liked UCLA?" He asked, knowing she'd enjoyed her time with Hunter.

"I did. And I really do love California." she said.  "When I was out there, I got in contact with an admissions counselor and it all just sorta clicked. The more I've thought about it, I don't want to just trail behind Hunter or stay here for Justin or you or mom. I think it's time I start making my own path."

Lin smiled wide. His daughter was coming into her own, and his only job was to support her. "Sounds like a really good plan, mija."

Lia grinned before taking another bite of the creamy dish. "Plus, it's one of the top schools in the country." 

"That's not everything," he pointed out.  "It still needs to be the right fit."

She nodded.  She hadn't even visited the school in person yet.  She might hate it.  "Could I go on a visit in January?"

"Of course," he said, wiping his mouth with a napkin.  "Let's look at plane tickets after the twins go to bed."

"No bed!" Stella immediately protested at the dreaded three letter word.

"Not yet, goober," Lin told her.  "You can play for a bit after dinner, then bathtime."

"I don't need a bath," she protested.  Lin gently pulled out a few pieces of hair from her face so Stella could see what a mess she was.

"I beg to differ," Lin said.  Stella took the hair and proceeded to lick the cheese off of it.

"Stella, ew," Lia chided her younger sister, who giggled.

_____

After dinner and bathtime, Lia brought her laptop out to the living room as her father was finishing putting the twins to bed.  He was the best at storytime and the twins could almost always manage to get him to read an extra book.  After a good twenty minutes, Lin finally came out and joined her on the couch.

Looking at her school schedule, she had MLK Day off, so they decided to book tickets to go that Friday night.  They'd spend the weekend there and get a school tour on Monday.  They decided to make it a father/daughter trip, just the two of them.

Lia happily closed her laptop and set it on the coffee table, then reached for the remote.

"I've been meaning to ask you something," Lin said as she began to flip through Netflix.

"Uh-huh?" She said mindlessly.

"Your school contacted again about the commencement address.  I never got back to them the last time." he told her, wondering how she'd react.  The last time he had broached the topic she had been in a hospital bed a few hours later. It had been one of the scariest nights of his life and the conversation about graduation had been tabled. Lin knew she liked to fly under the radar and didn't want to be known as Lin-Manuel Miranda's kid.  She had worked so hard and the last thing he wanted was to take away from her day, "I can give my agent a few names to provide them.

Lia grinned as she found the comedy section. "You should give them yours." she told him.

Lin looked at his daughter with a look of reservation, "That's not the answer I thought you were going to say at all."

Lia rolled her eyes, "Dad. There is no one who would do a better job. And graduation isn't just my day, and I was selfish for ever saying differently." 

Lin gave a sigh of relief and pressed a kiss to her temple.

"Just no embarrassing stories," she told him seriously.

"Can I rap?" he asked her.

Lia grinned and looked at him.  "Of course."