Sirius

The next few days we didn't see much of Lily and Remus. Whenever I went to check(believe me, I checked a lot) their door was always closed. It was one such day, four days after the two newcomers moved in, when Lily opened their door and made to go down the hall.

I had been sitting against the wall for a longer time than I'd care to admit, writing in my journal, waiting for a glimpse of the boy next door.

"Oh!" Lily exclaimed, jumping in surprise. "Hey, Sirius," she greeted.

"Lily," I nodded, straining my neck to see if I could see Remus before the door closed. Lily saw me looking and grinned.

"He's shy, just go over there and say hello."

I flicked my pencil against my thigh repeatedly, going over my options. I was dying to see Remus again, sure, but I was also extremely nervous. Hell, he might not even be gay and I'd just be making a fool of myself trying to flirt with him. But then again, why would Lily be giving me that knowing smile if she wasn't trying to pair us together? She seems like the type.

So I sighed and got to my feet, tucking my journal under my arm. Lily opened the door for me and I knocked on the frame, alerting Remus of my presence. He looked up from his spot on the couch, eyes wide in surprise.

"Oh. Hey," he said as I sat down on the couch next to him. He had a sketch pad and colored pencils on his lap. He was sketching a pair of lungs with beautiful flowers blooming inside.

I pulled the sleeves of my leather jacket down lower and smiled. "I've been incredible bored all the way over at my place," I said. "I'd love to get to know you, Remus Lupin."

Remus's face flushed a bit and he hurriedly closed his sketchbook. "I don't know why you'd want to get to know me," Remus said. "I'm just the quiet kid who can hardly breathe."

I scoffed. "Why wouldn't I want to get to know you? You are the single most adorable guy to ever live! And plus you intrigue me."

Remus blushed and looked down, a small smile on his face. "You think I'm adorable?"

His eyes darted up again and locked with mine. And damn.

I nodded frantically. Remus laughed.

"So," he said, "what do you want to know?"

My eyes flicked to the IV rack next to the couch and my eyes followed a tube to where it disappeared under Remus's sweatshirt. He caught me looking and swallowed, turning so he was sitting criss cross, big fluffy socks over his sweatpants.

I mimicked how he was sitting. "Tell me about yourself," I suggested.

"Well, I was diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis when I was two years old and--"

"No, no, no, we can get to that later. I want to know about you."

Remus's lips parted in surprise and I found my eyes lingering there for a little longer than necessary.

"Oh, um, well...I like to paint obviously. Which is why I'm majoring in art. I like to sketch, too. Especially something I plan on painting. I don't know what else to say." He was rambling.

"I saw you drawing lungs," I prompted. "You're really good."

Pink rose to Remus's face. "Lungs are my favorite thing to paint. I like to paint healthy lungs, or lungs with flowers blooming in them because--"

Remus cut himself off. "Never mind, it's cheesy as fuck and you probably don't care."

"Whoa, hey, keep going. I happen to care a lot, actually."

Remus still looked unsure, but he continued anyway. "Well, I like to paint what I wish my lungs looked like. Or at least how I imagine them."

I furrowed my eyebrows, not sure where he was going with this.

"I like to imagine I have flowers blooming inside of me. I like to think that that's why I have so much trouble breathing. That instead of a build up of mucus, it's flowers, or trees, or galaxies in there. Because then, even though it hurts sometimes and it sucks, at least it's beautiful."

"Holy shit, Remus," I mutter.

"What?" He asks with a giggle. He giggled and my heart stopped for a second.

"That was deep and beautiful and oh my heart hurts now."

Remus looked down with a smile on his face.

"What else? Tell me more!" I begged.

"Is this an interrogation, or do I get to ask questions too?" He asked.

I chuckled. "Alright, have at it. A question for a question."

He thought about it for a minute, his nose scrunching up. "You said you want to be an author. Elaborate."

"Well, I just...hm. I don't know. Words. Words for me are like paint. It's my favorite thing in the world to paint a picture with words. It's like magic, and my pen is the wand. World building, characters, crazy plot lines, and kinky shit? That right there is my passion."

Remus twisted his nasal cannula tube around his finger, eyes wide and curious.

"What genre do you write?" He asked.

"Nope. My turn. Are you and Lily...a thing?" I asked.

"No! No, no, no, we're friends. We've been best friends since middle school and I love her to death, but no. We're definitely not a thing."

"Not into redheads?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Not into girls," he answered with a shrug.

"Oh! Sweet!" I cheered. Remus laughed.

"Okay, so answer my question. What genre?"

I thought about it. "You know, I'm not really sure. I haven't really settled on a style yet. I love reading poetry, like, it literally owns my soul at the moment, but I'm actual shit at writing it. I dabbled in fiction which isn't too bad if I've got a good plot idea. I guess you could say I've done some non-fiction, if you could count high school essays. I did go through a phase though where it was solid horror and gothic literature. Like I said, I'm still figuring it out. I'm pretty flexible."

Remus bit his lip. "I didn't know talking about writing genres was so sexy, but here we are."

"Wow, and here I thought you would be the innocent one."

"Yeah, tough luck with that one."

"Okay, next question. Hm. What's your favorite food?" I asked.

"Chocolate," he said with zero hesitation.

"Whoa, okay, I'll keep that in mind."

Remus grinned. "Do you have any siblings?"

My mood darkened a bit. "I have a younger brother, yeah. He turns eighteen on Christmas. We aren't super close."

Remus nods, sensing my mood but pushing it a bit further. "What's his name?"

"Regulus," I answered simply.

Remus smiled reassuringly and the subject moved along. "Your turn," he said.

As I thought of something to say, my eyes wondered back over to the IV rack and the tube and Remus and I wanted to ask about it, but I didn't want to overstep boundaries or be rude.

Remus smiled again. "It's okay, you can ask. I don't mind."

I bit my lip. "What's that for?" I asked. "Sorry," I added.

"It's my G-tube," he said. "It's basically to make sure I get all my calories. I don't have a big appetite, and though Lily's constantly shoving food down my throat, this works better. Plus I can hook it up before I go to bed, too, which is a plus."

"Wait, how many calories do you actually need?" I asked.

"Uh, like, 3,000 to 4,000 a day. It depends."

"Hm. Alright, Remus, your turn."

"Did you know--"

"Oh so this is a did you know question now? I see how it is."

Remus giggled. "Shut up, you. Anyway, did you know that you're named after a star?"

"I did know that actually. My middle name's Orion, after my dad."

Remus smiled. "Did you know that the Canis Major is my favorite constellation? I actually got this scar from stargazing, you know." He said, gesturing to the scar on his face.

"Oh?"

Remus nodded, coughing into his sleeve. "Oh yeah. Way back in sixth grade. It was the night I came out to my parents and they...well I was staying at Lily's, and she could see I was upset, so we went outside to look at the stars. I remember Lily pointing out all the constellations, and I was suddenly so suffocatingly far from the stars. I told Lily I was going to climb the tree. My lungs were better back then, but still. You saw me climb the stairs, I'm hopeless."

Remus had to pause, coughing some more.

"Did you climb the tree?" I asked, amused.

"Damn-fucking-right I climbed the tree. Lily followed me and it was fall so the leaves had fallen and I wasn't so far from the stars anymore. We saw a shooting star, and we wished for new lungs for me, just like we always do. I was being stupid, testing my luck really. I hung upside down from my legs and let all the blood rush to my head. I started to think, "What if the grass is actually the ceiling and I'm swimming through the sky trying to reach it?"

I smiled. "You have such a beautiful way with words, Remus."

He rolled his eyes at me, but I did catch a slight blush on his cheeks. "It was getting hard to breathe, with the cold air and being upside down and all. Plus I was feeling lightheaded. So I let--I fell. I don't remember anything after that, only that I hit a branch on the way down, tore open my face. And thus, the scar."

"Jeez. You're so perfect."

"Perfect? You obviously have the wrong person. There's no way I'm even close to--"

"You are so fucking perfectly imperfect and it's beautiful and I think I'm  in love."

"What have you done to my heart?"