Chapter 18

Funnily enough, the pain was actually just a small prick that I'd come to get used to. The sting had been bad initially, but the adrenaline was rushing, and my senses felt even more acute, my pain dulled even as the paramedic pressed something on the wound.

"Calm down, Mr. Young." The young, twenty-plus paramedic said. He had a short cropped head of blond hair, paired with the rugged features of a model. It was easy to imagine girls his age or younger looking at him and giving him loving sighs of desire. It was quite the pity to have him a paramedic for his looks would have greatly been appreciated on front pages of magazines. Still, I couldn't doubt a man's choice of vocation, given mine, and so I remained silently staring, trying my best to relax as instructed.

"It is particularly difficult to do so." I replied in the usual evened and informative tone. In times of adrenaline as such, I usually controlled myself and my composure much tighter than normal, almost like an elastic band stretched almost to the limit and past. "I might calm down on will but the adrenaline needs to wear out."

"You need to relax, Mr. Young, to stop the adrenaline from pumping into your bloodstream. Right now you are tightly wound up, a reaction to barely escaping danger. You need to make yourself relax a little more." The paramedic insisted, but the ambulance jerked on a brake, and my arm hit against one of the many machines. This earned a hiss of pain from me, and a helplessly concerned look from the young paramedic.

"Relax..." I repeated, trying to drum the idea into my head and tensed body. Still, it wasn't every day that I was shot at and chased down by gunmen and enemies waiting to run me down around corners. "Relax..."

It was not a particularly easy thing to do, as I regulated my breathing. Long silence punctuated the sounds of alarm in the background, but even as I breathed evenly I could still feel the irrational tension in my muscles. It was an in-built con-mechanism; to still be tensed even after calming down. We were used to springing in moments, and reacting to danger in the most rational but sure way possible.

I opened my eyes when soft, sure fingers prodded the corners of the still-bleeding wound. Somehow, the pain still felt far away. The fingers retreated quickly, but there was a confused frown on the young man's face.

"You're calm but still tensed. I don't know how you do it, but you need to relax. I can't inject any anesthetics to ease the pain if your muscles are tightly contracted." He explained, seemingly perplexed at the situation. Perhaps he thought it was natural biology for a person to relax once he was calmed down.

I remained quiet, unable to help with the situation. I had made myself calm at will, but certain bodily functions weren't the easiest to control, especially after discovering the barrels of three guns all staring at me. Somehow it was an entire miracle that I was only shot in the arm during the crossfire. No one had expected me to be able to spring so quickly in reaction to the obvious physical threat. It surprised me that Ellen somehow still undermined me and my abilities, as of believing that there would be strength in numbers. Of course, that would never work against a member on The Circle like me. I could call escaping a success on my part, but it didn't seem all gay and happy with the bullet still in embedded in flesh. There was no question; the bullet had lodged in bone. I could only pray that my arm wouldn't be left useless forever.

"Think happy thoughts, Mr. Young. Thoughts of happy things. Or things you think of when you relax." The young paramedic advised again.

"For me, I think about the dates I share with my girlfriend. You can think of your wife or girlfriend, if it helps." He continued to offer, passing an uncertain smile that could be passed off as him trying to make some sort of a peace offering.

I stared blankly at him. "I don't have a partner."

"Oh!" He blushed up quickly, smile fading away to an embarrassed one. "I'm sorry. I only assumed you... with your looks and your tone when you spoke on the phone just now..."

My tone had been different?

"What did I sound like then?" I asked curiously, and he seemed to blush deeper at my pressing of the matter.

"In all honesty, Mr. Young, you sounded like you were speaking to your lover and telling her to take your son and leave for safety." He spoke, then pressed his lips together as if knowing he had spoken too much. His eyes fell away from mine and he searched the floor of the ambulance as if looking for a hole to swallow him up. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to assume too much. But you really did sound concerned; and it wasn't about yourself."

I had? It was a surprise to hear, for I had not realized the change in my tone at all. It felt so natural to speak to Kaylen as such, but I hadn't detected even the slightest change in the caliber of my tone. But I guessed it was only natural; now that I had come to consider Kaylen's safety as important as Jon's. I had a parental responsibility to Jon, but I had no idea what sort of responsibility I held to Kaylen.

Perhaps responsibility of keeping her safe until Hayden climbed out of whatever cave he was hiding in to come collecting his darling daughter from my grasp.

But until then, Kaylen was my responsibility. Granted, I had never really thought of her that way, but now as things became clear to me I began to understand the fact that I was simply looking for a pathetic excuse to forgive my heart’s calling. Kaylen had been the perfect nanny any troubled man like me needed –a woman who could connect to a rebellious teenager and make him change for the better. She had gotten through to more than Jon. She’d gotten through the hardened shield of a broken man, and somehow made him feel warm and loved, even if she didn’t love him at all.

Kaylen. I finally now knew what had made Hayley so desperate and out-of-character whenever matters came down to Jeremy’s health and safety. I finally now knew what had made Hayden so broken, so destroyed when Kristen left him twenty one years ago. They had loved hard, and had experienced the two-way loving relationship.

Watching them, I lost courage to love. I already had Jon as a weakness. I hadn’t wanted –or needed- to add Kaylen onto that list. I didn’t dare to love her, and the more I denied, the more I did. The more I told myself that I just watched her for her possibility of being Hayden’s daughter, the more I began to look for her well-being in all sense, going out of my way to protect her from hidden dangers –and then wasting even more effort to mask the fact that I had done exactly what I did. Who was I afraid of finding out?

When Hayden claimed his daughter, he would make sure of her safety, wouldn’t he? Then why was I doing these things beforehand, knowing that one day, Hayden would find out that I had protected his daughter for his sake long before he did.

And then, one day Hayden would realize that I fell for his daughter.

A sudden prick of pain shocks me back into reality, and I jolted. But my injured arm was held stationary by a strong hand, and I watched as the paramedic pressed slowly but surely on the plunger. The colorless liquid pumped into my arm, and he wordlessly removed the needle as quickly as he’d poked it in. There wasn’t exactly need for wiping after his deed, for my gunshot wound was still bleeding slowly onto the cloth that he’d pressed on it beforehand.

“I’m sorry for shocking you, Mr. Young. But whatever you were thinking about; it relaxed you enough for me to inject the anesthetic. Once you came back to reality you tensed up again; so I took the chance while you were drifting off.” He apologized quickly at my glower, but I guessed it was for the best, for I was starting to feel less and less of the throbs emanating from my arm.

In fact, I was feeling less and less of everything.

I closed my eyes, and in a few minutes, I was dead to the world.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

“How funny. In the times I hoped him dead, he just simply doesn’t die. When I decide to forgive him; he finds it in himself to put himself in such a vulnerable position that simply, as a con, I am obliged to take advantage of the situation.” The mildly amused and curious voice drifted above the haze of unconsciousness, aiding my journey back into reality as I slowly became aware of my surrounding and the fact that I had been asleep.

“If there’s something I learned lurking around the lower circles of the cons under The Circle’s rule, Hayden, is that you shouldn’t ever piss off a man on The Circle. I’m quite surprised you don’t understand this point as of yet, considering your familiarity with your post for the past… how many years has it been?” A relaxed, comfortable tone of voice replied, alerting me of the presence of another visitor.

“Twenty-three years and still counting. I’ll never get used to this crap, Jeremy. It’s kind of hard to remember the days where it was just Mum and Dad, you, Hayley and me. But who am I kidding? This was the life I dreamt of when I was young.” Hayden replied with a scoff, as if laughing at himself.

“All powerful and scary on The Circle? Scaring all the new cons with your reputation?” Jeremy chanced a guess, and Hayden laughed softly in reply. It was a strange turn of events, to have Hayden laughing at my bedside. He had only thrown me a punch the last time we met, and he had gone missing for the weeks afterwards –to have him laughing again at my bedside wasn’t the best of situation I could deal with while nursing a bullet wound on my arm.

“Alone and strong in all situations.”

I opened my eyes, blinking slowly a few times to take in my surroundings. Though the heavy smell of medicinal alcohol had been a dead giveaway, my brain had seemed to reject the idea until the sight of the hospital ward met me. What was even more interesting was the sight of Hayden, dressed in uncharacteristic casual shirts and pants, sitting at the chair meant for visitors at my side. Jeremy leaned against the foot of the bed, arms crossed but face holding an emotion better describe as helpless, wary amusement.

“Back to reality.” Jeremy announced with a smile of welcome. “You sure don’t take your time with rest, don’t you?”

“Not with the two of you talking at my side, no.” I replied evenly, but the even tone wasn’t exactly pulled off with a hoarse voice. I made a move to get some water, but was surprised when I saw a glass already left out ready for me. I looked up to Hayden in surprise, watching his replied straight face, as if he were trying to mimic my expressionless face.

“Thanks.” I obliged as I accepted his glass with my uninjured hand, gulping down the refreshing taste of water.

“It’s laced with poison.” Hayden replied, but I didn’t give the desired reaction as I passed the empty glass back to him.

“Poison is the least that you can do to hurt me. Not with what you’re undoubtedly here to do.” I replied honestly.

 I don’t know who was more surprised and confused: Hayden or me.

“Here to do what?” Hayden asked, blue eye shining with wariness as if he didn’t want to regret his coming to visit me. I searched his eyes, his expression, and the tell-tale signs I knew from Hayden to be lying, and yet found none.

“You didn’t see the mail I sent you?”

Slowly, he shook his head. “How long ago?”

“About a week or two ago.” I replied, a crushing feeling of relief crashing into me. Elation followed me in the next breath I breathed, but at the same time came the guilt that I’d shorn off when I pressed the Send button so long ago. While I could now defend myself and say that I tried to send him the details of his daughter and wife, it still remained a fact that I was still happy that he knew nothing.

“Is it something I should have seen?”

If I was a morally right man, I would have told him everything. If I was a man who had been detached from everything, I would have no problems telling him everything. But at the moment, I needed Kaylen more than anything. Aside from the fact that I needed to protect her from the danger that Ellen and her allies now posed, I needed her to bring Jon running whenever the danger got too close. She was probably the only person I trusted to listen to me, and obey me without thoughts of double-crossing me.

“Nothing. Just another heist I thought you would be better off doing.” I breezed the matter quickly away, snapping my eyes away from his just in case he saw something. No matter how good liars we all were, it was still human reaction to give even the slightest hint of a lie. It was only up to us con members to identify each other’s unconscious reaction, and I didn’t want Hayden recognizing mine –whatever it may be.

“What are you doing here?” I asked Jeremy pleasantly, taking the chance to escape Hayden’s quick mind. There was no questioning the roots of doubt were beginning to form in Hayden’s head, but it was nothing I could hack away at the moment.

“I heard about Ellen’s plan, but didn’t think you’d really go for it. When I got news that you came out injured, I flew down to visit you. Hayden turned out to have overheard me and followed me. We met downstairs.” Jeremy explained.

“How did he overhear you?” I asked, a little curious. Far as I knew, Hayden had his own place in NYC, while Jeremy and Hayley had another apartment not far from her brother for their own privacy. Surely Hayden hadn’t taken it upon himself to install microphones in his sister’s and sister-in-law’s apartment?

“After that day, I locked myself in the room and thought about things. Mainly about how to destroy you and eventually kill you without triggering another war which could possibly take the lives of other cons like how the war between Hayley and Tyler had done to May and Jed.” Hayden started, taking the attention back to him. “And then Kaylen came and talked to me. That woman of yours; she’s a real keeper. Anyhow, she said some things that really got through to me. I took my time bouncing back up. I was ready to face the world, to face you again, but it must be God’s irony that I hear Jeremy –who has been appointed by my ever worried sister to take care of me –getting a call about your injury.”

The silence after Hayden’s speech was spent with Jeremy admiring his brother-in-law’s maturity, and me admiring Kaylen for her bravery. I knew when she sneaked into my study; I knew when she went looking for Hayden’s address. I knew when she lied about visiting a friend in NYC, and her credit card receipts had told me exactly where she went and what she did. But if she was going out to look for her father, I could say nothing to stop.

I would never imagine that she went out to clear his mind –without either of them still knowing that they were father and daughter.

Someone must be playing a divine prank upon us; to have them so close yet so far, to have my emotions of hope, guilt and disappointment intertwining so hilariously with each other.

“Then I assume you have found someplace in yourself to forgive me, given my sad state?” I asked, not exactly one for playing the pity card. Still, I would take my situation’s advantage; though I wouldn’t call being shot in the arm a particularly pitiful situation. I would place bets that Kaylen had said some strong words to Hayden, for how could he still be here, smiling faintly at me if not for her?

“This state is hardly worth mentioning.” He breezed past, as if my injury meant nothing. “But for your woman, I’ll forgive you. Kaylen really said some things. In a way, you are right. Twenty one years have gone. Even if I find my daughter, what can I say or do? She probably has a boyfriend or husband, probably doesn’t need a father in her life anymore. I can’t put Kristen in front of me forever, searching desperately for a woman who left me. She learnt how to run from a Seyfried. I should know better than expect to find her anyway.”

Surprise wills both Jeremy and I to silence. Even at 41, it is hard to see Hayden so mature and straightened out in thinking. It was not the best to say of a man his status and power on The Circle, but we often thought of Hayden as a man who never seemed to completely discard the remnants of his teenage years. Even older than me biologically, we often thought of Hayden as the younger, disobedient boy.

Situational irony was plainly in play now –seeing how his daughter was the most mature of women her age, and yet he was the least mature of men his age.

“I take back what I said. I’ll continue searching for Kristen, but only if you don’t put any more pressure on me. I’ll search for her as a side mission." I amended, for it was always better to keep an ally on The Circle rather than an enemy. I had never really thought that Hayden would ever forgive me, but only time would tell if my fellow conman was being truthful.

Conmen and truth were usually mutually exclusive ideals, however.

Hayden nodded gratefully at my compromise, and in an instant, it seemed almost as if that day had never happened, with Hayden grinning childishly at me as if he had won the world's biggest prize. He would feel as if he had won the biggest prize, however, when he finally found out the truth about his daughter, about Kaylen.

But for now, it was all I could, as a conman, concede to allowing.

“Forgiveness and whatnot aside; I thought I would see the beauty Kaylen around. Where is she?” Hayden asked, cursory eyes glancing almost as if he had expected to see her hiding in some corner of the ward, waiting to spring out in surprise to him.

“You might do well to understand the last time I was conscious, it was in the back of an ambulance. I have no idea how much time has passed, much less what happened.” I informed, and Hayden gave what seemed like a disappointed sigh while Jeremy raised a brow at my honesty in proclaiming my lack of knowledge of my surrounding. No conman would willingly let it be known that he was helpless in his situation, and proclaiming this ideal to another member on The Circle was simply a man begging to be taken advantage of.

Still, we had some sort of a pact going on, so Jeremy only smiled amusedly.

“Relax; not much time has passed. We arrived just as the surgery was done removing the bullet from your arm. You wore off the anesthetic an hour later; here we are.” Jeremy explained, and I nodded gratefully for his help.

“Do you want to tell us explicitly what happened? It’s not every day that I hear someone brave enough to point a gun at a member on The Circle. Hayley and Myriam are trying their best to keep the rumors under the carpet, you know how things go. If you don’t declare someone in betrayal to the con world, it’s going to upset some balance. Especially amongst the people following you loyally.” Hayden asked with the concerned, worried persona that was totally novel to me as I stared at him a moment too long.

“What?” He asked crossly when only surprised silence met him.

“You…” I hesitated, forcing my initial comment away from my lips. I could not afford to link him to Kaylen as of yet. If I wanted to keep her with me, safe, just for a little while more, then I would simply avoid any reference of her from Hayden’s presence. “… actually care. What a surprise.”

Hayden’s expression was one of indignant righteousness, but at the same time was a spark of suspicion in his eyes as he snagged on quickly to my initial hesitation. Deliberately, I wiped all traces of detection from my face and forced my usual placid expression.

“It was Ellen Lorrens.” I conceded to say, surveying the bandage wrapping tightly around my forearm. Flexing my fingers on my right arm hurt, but I could thank the stars that my dominant hand was the left.

The shocked silence that followed my announcement allowed a span of time for me to recollect my thoughts. Given my injury, and the time it took for my anesthetic to wear it, it must be about 4-5 hours after the incident. If Ellen had come charging at me with vengeance in her heart, without care for everything else, then she would be chasing after Jon and Kaylen now –knowing my weakness for them. Her attacking me had been nothing but a ruse to put me out of commission temporarily so that she could destroy me completely after she got her hands on the weaknesses of my heart.

“May’s… sister? Has the feud between Dal and Lorrens not ended yet?” Jeremy’s voice was pained, as if he could not bear the thought of another con war starting again between the families. But what families would it be if only Jon and I stood by Dal? Essentially, it was only me for Jon could never –and would never –be mixed up in the complications of the world of cons.

“It never did.” I replied softly. When May and Jed died, it was marked the end of full-on war between Dal and Lorrens, for there was no one left in the Dal family except for me. Over time, Lorrens lost their power and I gained mine instead. We stayed out of each other’s way, but to say that the feud was over? I wasn’t so optimistic. “Ellen came to me months ago looking for help. She and Archer Lorren pissed of a Killian and had the entire family chasing them. She wanted me to provide her an outlet; to stand out and make the Killian stand down.”

“Let me guess; you said no.” Hayden interjected flatly, and at this I barely tamed my smirk away.

“But of course. No one with the right mind will use their position to oppress the Killian family. But it goes further than that. Call me petty; but I will never forget how she betrayed May. I said no, but I gave her a place and money to hide. She refused my pity. She swore to make me pay.” I explained, the light of understanding coming to the men’s eyes.

“So the shooting is her idea? Not very bright for a Lorren.” Hayden scoffed.

“She’s keeping me out of commission to get to Jon. But I’ve got him covered.”

“But not your con duties and your need to answer to the larger world that may be thrown into chaos at your words.” Jeremy interrupted, arms crossed across his chest as he stood straight, no longer leaning against the end of the bed. The respectful awe and silent admiration shone in his eyes as he turned to observe my face –which was carefully schooled to show no expression.

“You son of a bitch.” Hayden cursed, a little slower in the realization, as he drew back as if suddenly seeing me in a new light. “You stinking, conniving hellhole of a conman.”

“Say what you wish.” I shrugged nonchalantly. “I am not Hayley nor Danaus, but I have learnt from the best.”

Hayden’s face was an ever changing kaleidoscope of emotions –anger, amusement, awe, amazement, wonder, indignance. Finally, he seemed to settle on helpless amusement as he threw his hands up in defeat.

“I don’t know how you do it, but I guess Jed taught you right. Fine. Leave your con duties to me and go bitch-fight with Ellen.” Hayden stood up with a huff, brushing his shirt in a habitual movement despite the fact that he wasn’t wearing his usual suits. “But don’t you dare lose, for I’m going to be betting a large amount on your head.”

At this, I let out a rare bark of laughter.

“I am a Dal. I never lose.”

How true I wished it could be.

_____________________________________________________________________________________

I don’t know how it happens, but it took way too long for the alarms to be ringing in my mind, as I blinked in surprise, looking at my visitor.

She hadn’t taken long herself, for shortly after Hayden and Jeremy left, she’d called and reported herself safely back in her own home –since she hadn’t wanted to book a hotel room –and asked for the name of the hospital I was in. In the time it took for her to come down visiting, the doctor had checked for my overall health, contemplated at the situation of my bullet wound in my arm, then declared that if no complications or infection happened around the arm, then I would be free to be discharged the next day.

Of course, advice had been given to refrain from strenuous, strength-exerting exercises involved with my right arm. But as a conman, it was rather an unpleasant thought to keep my arm inactive. God forbid should I lose the skills of pickpocketing due to months of inactivity.

Kaylen had arrived a mere ten minutes before this, showering me with worried questions after questions which –I will only admit on in a very private level of conscience –I partly enjoyed. Worried for me, she’d rushed down without much care about much of anything –mainly emphasized by her haphazardly-thrown-on shirt and ever present jeans. I was rather surprised to have not seen a pair of flip-flops on her feet as she came rushing in with bad hairdo; almost as if she’d run the entire distance to the hospital.

“Kaylen.” I blinked, my mind suddenly going blank at the heavy realization that hit me only ten minutes after her arrival. The guilt and shame crushed me internally, but I showed none of it as I kept stern, firm eyes on her. “Where is Jon?”

No matter how much Jon hated me, surely he would at least tag on with Kaylen to come down to the hospital? It was not news that Jon didn’t care a single bit about my welfare, but at least he cared enough about Kaylen to know that she was in danger, and that –if he was any a gentleman –he should be around to prevent any potential danger?

At my question, Kaylen seemed to fidget a little, and her eye contact fell.

My heart fell.

“Where is Jon?” I asked again, more insistent this time. How could I have missed his presence? Had something happened? Had they been intercepted in the midst of running? It couldn’t be. Surely Ellen hadn’t been working so fast? I had called Kaylen almost immediately after getting on the ambulance –there was no possible way that Ellen had escaped to get to them so quickly.

But what if the cons with Ellen hours ago had not been everyone in her small army?

“Gods above, where is Jon?!?” I asked again, raising my voice uncontrollably now as I watched Kaylen squirm underneath the sudden pressure that had descended upon us. It couldn’t be… Jon couldn’t have…

The mental flash of images of May and Jed frowning at me and shaking their heads came, but I pushed them away along with the rising nausea. No... I thought I could trust Kaylen to…

I wasn’t about to entertain such thoughts of Kaylen’s apparent failure. I had to get Jon first.

“What happened to him? Where did he go?” I asked, no longer interested to recline on the hospital bed as I leaned forwards quickly to grasp Kaylen’s arm in a tight grip with my uninjured hand. All infatuation and heart’s calling aside, Jon was family. Jon was the only person I truly ever had left in this world.

If I failed Jon…

Then I would have failed everyone.

“Mr. Elxa, you’re hurting me!” She exclaimed with shock, trying to shake my hand away but she couldn’t hope to stop a skilled conman who had begun to get his adrenaline pumping again.

"Tell me! Where is Jon?" I insisted, letting my voice go into the range of dangerous levels. Kaylen must have recognized it somehow, for her struggles stopped and blue innocent eyes widened, the edges tinged with new-found fear.

"H-He barged into your study when I told him you were shot on business. He began flipping through everything you had like a madman... And then saw some book in your drawer at your desk. He said something about Ms. Ellen, then before I could react he just ran out of the house. I was so shocked I couldn't react until after he was out the door and probably far away." Kaylen stuttered, wide eyes beginning to fill with unshed tears.

In that moment, I was unsure whether the crushing weight of fear or the tidal wave of relief crashed into me first. Fear for Jon's life was the more dominant one, as I forced myself to think.

I couldn't trust Jon's mind to come up with the wrong conclusion; no. The high IQ had been cleverly displayed when he graduated as the valedictorian and top student in Miami College. With the records of my dealing with Ellen in the book as mentioned...

There was no doubting that Jon had found Ellen; or the other way around.

With effort, I unclenched the fingers wrapped around delicate wrist, and forced myself to think, rubbing my brows as I closed my eyes. I had played my cards correctly with Ellen, Hayden and Jeremy.

I had forgotten about my cards left with Jon.

"Mr. Elxa..." Kaylen stuttered fearfully, the tremble in her voice giving away the trepidation of her inner feelings.

"Kaylen." Her name was a sharp, grating tone in my voice.

Her squeak of reply pierced through the fear clouding in my heart and I blinked, staring at her with a cold stillness in my heart.

"Kaylen." I repeated, making sure my eyes were flat on her, my voice an evened tone. "I need you to go downstairs now and buy a phone for me. I'm going to change while you're gone, then I'm going to go after Jon. You will take the next taxi and go back to your home. Once there, you will lock the doors and windows and stay there. You will open the door only to me or Jon; do you understand me?" I spoke lowly; seriously.

The fear that flooded her eyes became even more real, but Kaylen was used to obeying my instructions as she gulped and shakily nodded.

"W-What are you going to do, Mr. Elxa?" She must not be as fearful of the situation as I thought, for she still found some part of her courage enough to question.

"I'm going to go home and get my gun. Then I am going to look for Jon and pay Ellen back all that I owe her. Enough that she shoots me. Jon is another matter altogether." I answered truthfully, sliding my legs off the bed. The faint trace of anesthetic and an empty stomach hit s little dizziness in my head, but it was nothing I couldn't deal with as I opened the drawer that -expectedly -kept my clothes. My phone was there.

"Ms. Ellen shot you? Jon's aunt?" Kaylen asked, this time more shocked and incredulous than scared.

"Ellen Lorrens. But it is time everything ends, and I want you to play on my side in this game. Do as I tell you to; you will be safe." I replied lowly, snapping my gaze back to her. The fear and shock fluttered back to her blue eyes, and she quickly jumped to her feet.

"Yes, sir!" She reported, and before a word could be said, she rushed out of the room.

How she ever ignored the fact that she was brushing the skirts of a dangerous world; I would never understand. How she ever forgot the fact that I had promised to end a fight with my gun; I couldn't comprehend.

But it remained a fact that I'd said those words -said them with conviction.

And I, Elxa Dal, was going to deliver.