The sun had set, leaving nothing but dusk. I decided to read something to pass time.
Something I usually did to pass time.
My phone vibrated uncontrollably. I immediately remembered that Jessica and I had exchanged phone numbers earlier that day.

The screen lit up revealing her name along with five messages from her.
As I heard a knock on the door, I turned my phone off promptly. It was a force of habit; every time my parents came into my room I would put my phone down.
I never really did anything bad on my phone, but whenever they saw me with my phone they always suspected that I was up to something.

"Come in mom." The door opened and my mother's beautiful face appeared. She was still in her work clothes. A black pencil skirt, black blazer to match ,a red top beneath the blazer and a pair of black stilettos to finish the look.
"I made dinner like ...an hour ago," she said. "Okay," I responded mindlessly. I resumed reading.

"So do you want to talk about it?"
Did I?

My dad always ran to my mother whenever he needed back up, but the difference between my mother and father was that my mother gave me my space when it came to certain things. If she saw me with Trent she wouldn't have gotten involved. As long as he was not a criminal or trying to crawl into bed with me.

"I'd rather not," I exhaled.

"I understand that you need your privacy but just please be careful of who you hang around. Your father is only like this because he cares about you," she explained.

I closed my book but left my finger between the pages that I was reading. I sat up ready to fill her in on my side of the story. It was hard to control my emotions when I was so angry.

"He makes false accusations, gets upset because he made me find my own way home then barged in here to tell me who I can and cannot hang around."

"Yeah well, people have ways of showing that they love you...
If you don't mind me asking , how did you get detention? Just by the way," She asked curiously.
"It's a long story, I have a crappy teacher and I.. just stuck up for my friend," I explain. "Oh,"she said followed by several nods.

"It had nothing to do with the guy I came home with so you can relax," I reassured her with a fake smile.
I'll admit I was always a little more scared of my mother than I was of my father. I probably still am.

But I guess her because she was always right and more mature compared to my father. I shared a better relationship with her too.
"I don't like the idea of you getting detention, but since it's for a good deed I'll let it slide,"she said. "Well that's all I came for. That and to tell you that your father and I decided to go out on Friday night."
"Date night?"
"New restaurant opening. ' Champagne Glass', " she answered

I assumed it was my father's idea since she used a deep voice for ' Champagne Glass'.
Before leaving my room she had one more request: "Please try and get along with your dad".
' Maybe, I don't know, I'll think about it.'

"Okay ," I nodded.

After watching her leave my room, I sat back against the wall of my window seat and let out a breath of air that I had been holding back from the time my mother entered my room. I suppose the nice thing about my mom was that she was reasonable.
I looked out the window and notice a couple in the street. They both looked young, like they could have been my age. He tickled her playfully and they both laughed. He stopped and she wrapped her arms around his neck. They stared at each other as if they are both under a love spell. He leaned towards her to kiss her.

I sort of craved a romantic relationship. At my 'young' age.

I haven't been in many relationships when I was teenager, however I did manage to 'score' a  pathetic relationship.
With a pathetic guy. Well... He was pathetic when we were fourteen.

Our parents were good friends and so were we. His name was Keenan. Keenan and I had been friends from the age of eleven and as we got older we found ourselves a little... too attached. He stole my first kiss. Well, he taught me how to kiss.
We couldn't tell our parents about it. For some reason that was the fun part.

After a few months of french kisses, laughing together and the butterflies in my stomach; he turned out to be a jerk.
Enormous ego. Selfish. And slightly insulting. He made me think less of myself. It was hard to look in a mirror. Then he cheated. I found out through my best friends that he was dating my cousin. They were in the same school at the time. She and I weren't close cousins so that explained how I never found out about it sooner.

I got up from the window seat, leaving my book and phone behind. I took out my shower goods and clean pajamas. I went off for the bathroom to take a shower.

I took my clothes off and watched them pool at my feet. I put one foot after the other into the tub and turned the nozzle. The room misted up a little.
I felt the droplets of hot water fall onto my skin. Tears filled my eyes then rolled down my cheeks. It was a... normal thing.

Every night I would cry in the shower for some reason. It may seem strange but was completely normal to me. It was hard. I know that crying means that deep emotions are being felt and those emotions hurt, but crying and acknowledging that you're crying was purely agonizing. Knowing that there's a reason for that pain, understanding the trauma and feeling helpless because you're not in control of those emotions hurt more than anything.

Still under the shower head I washed my face and wiped my eyes. My headache subsided as I massaged shampoo into my scalp.
The thought of Trent came to mind and surprisingly, a feeling of nonchalance and relief took over me.

I suppose his clown-like behaviour was quite amusing. I turned the taps off and stepped out of the tub. After drying myself and my hair I changed into a baggy t-shirt and PJ shorts. I decided to make two braids in my hair so that it's easier to do in the morning.

As I gazed into the bathroom mirror I noticed the streaks of red surrounding my green irises. Bright green with a little red from crying . I left the bathroom and entered my bedroom. Fortunately, I did not come face to face with my parents.

I decided to go to bed without eating because I didn't have much of an appetite. I threw my dirty clothes into my laundry basket and turned off the lights before climbing into bed. I looked up at my ceiling then stared at it for a while before slowly falling into a deep sleep.

The next morning I woke up at 4:00 a.m. , which was two hours earlier than usual. I took some time to scroll through some of the messages on my phone and I replied to a few of my contacts. Jessica sent me several selfies of herself, taking up 20% of my storage space.
I turned my phone off and put it on my nightstand and looked out my window  to notice the dark sky.
I couldn't fall asleep so I remained awake until I saw the sunrise.

And didn't I regret answering my phone at five in the morning.