After shawn finished up at the studio we headed back to his place. I wanted to mention about the whole coffee shop girl thing but it didn't seem like the right time.
"You liked the song right?"
"It was great" I reply simply showing little emotion. "Are you alright?" He asks and I nod.
We continue to walk in silence, our hands loosely intertwined.
"So how do you pull inspiration to write so many songs" I ask curiously.
"Whatever is going on in my life I guess" he rubs my hand with his thumb.
When we reach my work he stops before I go inside. "Avs, I know something is up so please just tell me" he asks his hazel eyes pour into mine. "Look when you were recording yesterday I saw something in your journal, like descriptions of girls and then I saw 'coffee shop girl' and it's just, is that me? All I am to you? Is that how you address me in front of all your fancy studio pals" I say getting frustrated.
"You looked through my songbook?"
"No of course not, the page was left right open and it caught my eye"
He chuckles maliciously. "Of course that's not what I think of you and I expected you'd know that. I have gone out of my way for you to show you that I care multiple times now is that just not enough?" He grows angry.
"Shawn calm down I-" I try to apologise.
"I've wasted so much time on girls who are using me for money and fame and clout but this gets better, go update your fam account princess, tell everyone how I'm writing some song about some sad little coffee shop update account runner"
I gasp. As soon as he finishes his sentence his eyes turns softer and he realises what he's done. I turn on my heel and go into the coffee shop. Shawn calls my name and follows me in but I don't even acknowledge him. I feel the tears welling up in my eyes and realise it was all too good to be true.

Throughout the day I've received over 20 messages and calls from shawn but I have ignored them all. When I get in from work I take a warm shower. I still feel so hurt by Shawn. After all this time he still sees me as some fan. When I change and go into the kitchen Nadia and Blake are there.
"Hey guys" I greet them.
"Hey chicken, you look rough have you been crying?" She asks concerned.
"What? Oh no just took off my makeup"
"You're lying, he did something didn't he?"
"Nadia please stop I'd rather not discuss it now" I say gesturing towards Blake.
She sighs.
"I'm so sick of this Avery, you never talk to me anymore about anything"
Usually I would let this kind of thing slide but I am way too pissed off today to do that.
"Maybe that's because you're ALWAYS with your boyfriend. You are never ever around to talk to"
"Bullshit and you know it, just because you're stressed stalking your idol-
"Bore off I'm so done with this"
I say as I grab my keys and head straight out the door.

As I knock on the metal door of Shawn condo, I realise I look a mess. After 3 knocks he answers and looks stunned to see me. Immediately I fall into his chest and just cry.
"It's okay, shhh" he says rubbing my back.
When we get inside he makes me tea and we lay on his couch intertwined. I tell him about my fight with Nadia.
"Avery I'm so sorry about what I said earlier. I didn't mean any of it and I was such a dickhead, I'm just so stressed right now trying to meet deadlines and I know that's not an excuse but I'm so so sorry. I've never felt this excited about a girl before and I feel like I've screwed it up" he says sitting up and taking my hand.
"What you said really hurt my feeling but I knew you didn't mean it"
"I really really didn't and I'll never be that out of line again I promise"
I accept his apology by leaning in and kissing him. The kiss grows heated and soon I'm on top of shawn straddling him. I suddenly feel horrible cramps arriving and whimper with the pain. "Babe you okay?" He asks worried.     "Yeah sorry, just cramps" I pout and lay on his chest. He hums in response and runs his hands through my hair. I giggle and tell him that I love when he does that. Soon I find myself drifting off.
When I wake from my nap shawn is not under me. I go upstairs because I assume he's in his room. "Shawn?" I call and he tells me he's in his bathroom. I walk into his en-suite to find a bubble bath with rose petals and candles lit around it. "Have a bath and relax, I've left my clothes here for you to change into when you're ready and I'm going to run and get us a pizza and wine" he says and kisses my cheek.
"Shawn oh my gosh you're the best" I peck up on the lips. "Oh actually shawn" I call after him down the hall, "mmhmm?"
"I umm, I don't have any like um toiletries so would you mind maybe grabbing some at the store?" I ask.
"Of course" he smiles and heads off.

After we've ate and drank our body weight in pizza and wine, we find ourselves back laying in bed  together talking about life.
"We always end up like this"
"We do" I laugh and he joins.
"Is it harder then you expected? Like your job?" I ask.
"I wouldn't say harder, but just more than I expected. It's my dream and I wouldn't change it for the world I just feel like people expect a lot from me and my character. Being someone that a lot of young people look up to comes with enormous pressure and sometimes there's just more pressure deadline and music wise. Right now for example the album has to be done by November and it's just it's tough I guess. And then I end up getting over stressed and lashing out on others and I guess that's what happened today, I'm really sorry again, I still feel so guilty"
"Stop feeling guilty, I think you've made up for it" I laugh.
"I don't know what it's like to be you shawn, but I'm dying go" I murmur as we drift off into sleep.