i think i should put an epilepsy warning here??? there's a gif of black and white static at the end of this chapter so

↠Monday, October 28, 3rd Period

Spencer Rhodes

Oh no.

I knew it was bound to happen eventually, but that didn't make it any easier. Well, maybe if the hallways weren't so crowded all the time--

I winced, a quiet sigh falling from my lips. I stared at the heavy wooden door before me.

I vaguely remember wondering if I could just leave before pushing the door open.

"Ah, Spencer," a familiar voice said, and my shoulders slumped subconsciously, "Thank you for joining my class. But you're late."

I didn't respond, already far too aware of the fact that all my peers had turned around to stare at me. Heart racing and trying to subtly wipe at the sweat that had mysteriously appeared on my forehead, I took my seat and hoped that would be the end of it.

But it wasn't.

"So you don't have anything to say, then?" my math teacher, Mr. Merrow, said coldly. 

I ducked my head down. I felt his piercing gaze on me, but did not make any eye contact.

"Well, as I was saying," he finally said after a moment, granting me less than a heartbeat of relief. "To kick off November, we'll finally be discussing sine, cosine, and tangent lines--"

A suddenly fear gripped at my heart. Mr. Merrow was still talking--his mouth was still moving--but the only thing entering my ears was dead noise. Static. My hands were shaking fiercely as I tightened my grip on my pencil.

Oh no x2.

Was everyone staring at me? I felt like everyone was staring at me. They should be staring at me. Could anyone even notice?

The static in my head seemed to grow louder. Other students were glancing back and forth, whispering. But about what?

Me?

Me.

Before I could control myself or overthink anything, my hand shot into the air. Mr. Merrow had this, this look on his face. This look that said "Really? You're interrupting my class again?".

"Spencer?" his voice broke through the static, if only for a moment before returning louder than ever.

"Can I go to the bathroom?" my voice didn't sound like my own. But my mouth was moving, I was talking. I was blinking rapidly, trying to fight back my tears. 

Why was I crying? I had been fine just a moment ago... But the feeling that choked me was very familiar.

"First, you're late to my class, and now this? You should've gone during the passing per--"

"Pl-Please," I said, "It's an an emergency."

Mr. Merrow let out a visible sigh. "Hurry."

I stood up, and bolted into the hallway, barely listening to his message of "No running in the halls!"

I stared around at the hallways. I had been in this school for over 2 years, but it looked completely foreign to me.

Where was the bathroom?

My knees constantly threatening to collapse beneath me, I wiped at my wet eyes before continuing on at a pace "not quite running and far too slow for my current situation". At least, that's how I remember it feeling.

And then I was alone, locked up tight in one of the bathroom stalls. By now, tears were streaming down my cheeks at a steady rate. I was choking, I couldn't breathe. There was an attack, and my lungs had been the victim.

My heart was beating a mile a minute. I could feel the uneven thumping throughout my entire body. My legs, unable to support me anymore, melted away and I slid down the wall until I was nearly curled up on the very unhygienic bathroom floor.

I felt like I'd only been in there for about 2 second before the door was opening up and someone was stepping inside.

"Spencer? You in here?" a downcast, but male, voice said.

To say that I leaped to my feet would probably be an understatement, but in my haste, I ended up tripping over myself and falling back over with an amount of chaos and noise that felt very unnatural. Taking more time to watch where I placed myself, I climbed back onto my feet again, and responded.

"Y-Yes."

How obvious was it that I'd been crying? Considering I was coughing and gasping for breath, probably very.

In my first shock, I hadn't really paid attention to who was speaking, so desperate to get myself back together that I wasn't listening to what they were saying, but more to the fact that someone was saying anything at all.

But I recognized that voice. Very faintly, as it was someone that I wasn't sure I'd ever held a conversation with personally, but I knew who it was.

"You don't have t-to wait for... for me."

"Well, actually, Mr. Merrow sent me to get you. Make sure you hadn't fallen in or whatever," the extremely-apathetic-and-probably-couldn't-care-less voice said.

"What...? Why?"

"You've been gone for like fifteen minutes, Spencer. Kinda suspicious."

"W-What?"

"Fif. Teen. Min. Utes."

I didn't respond, wondering how time could've possibly passed so fast. Did my teacher have some sort of time-bending powers that I'd never been aware of? It would explain why his class always seemed to go so slow.

"So, open up, and let's go."

"N-No! Don't open the door!"

"Why not?"

Desperate for any possible excuse, I thought of a reason someone might be in a bathroom for an extended period of time that WASN'T because of a panic attack.

Period!

"Don't come in, I'm on my period!"

I immediately slammed my forehead into the wall. I don't know quite what I was thinking with that one.

There was a sound from behind the door that sounded like someone choking back their laughter, and I slammed my head into the wall again.

"Spencer, come on! We have to go back to class. Don't make me come in there myself!"

It was locked, there was no way he could--

The door swung open, and I am only slightly ashamed to admit that I screamed.

"Did you just pick the lock I mean how did you do that I locked the door--"

The boy now standing directly in front of me simply shrugged his shoulders, rustling the black hair that just cupped his chin. As he took a second look at me, his dark brown eyes suddenly widened as he stared down at me--as he was at least 4 inches taller.

Beckett Lynch.

"Wait... have you been crying?"

"Beckett, no, I haven't--"

"Well, you don't really strike me as the kind of person who smokes weed, so--"

"What makes you say that?" I said, crossing my arms and standing up slightly taller. I was willing to accept any possible excuse to my red puffy eyes that wasn't the truth.

"Do you REALLY want me to answer that? Just come here," Beckett suddenly jerked his head toward the sink and started walking over to it.

I hesitantly followed, just nearly every survival instinct ingrained into me screaming not to do it. I watched wearily as he grabbed a paper towel.

"W-What are you going to do to me?" I asked cautiously.

"I'm not going to do anything," Beckett said, holding out the paper towels for me. "Use these to get yourself back to looking like a fully-functioning teenager so we can get back to class."

I took them and started wiping at my eyes. Beckett was rhythmically tapping his foot against the title, sending a repetitive echo through the bathroom.

I quickly threw the paper towels in the trash, before turning to the mirror. I wasn't really sure that I looked any better or any worse, but before I knew it I was following Beckett back to class.

When we stepped inside, everyone stopped and turned around to stare at me again. How ironic was that?

I took my seat, and Beckett took his on the other side of the room, and we didn't speak for the rest of the day((despite the fact that we have several other classes together?)).

Oh, but that was just day one.