After sitting apart for hours, Felix couldn't help but glance over at Changbin. He felt bad for snapping but he couldn't help it. He felt so guilty. If he hadn't been with them, they could've found the others. Jisung wouldn't be freaking out in the corner, pretending he wasn't worrying about Minho.

It was clearly his fault.

And Changbin wouldn't let him take any blame. No one would.

But he had to. He could've cost them their lives.

But even though he wanted to be mad at himself, a selfish part of him longed to run over to Changbin and feel the soft warmth of his arms. He wanted Changbin to keep him safe and never let go.

He wanted to go to him so badly...but he couldn't. The more Changbin felt sorry for Felix, the more likely he'd be to keep making sacrifices for him. As long as he kept his distance, he could give Changbin a reason to finally let go of his dead weight.

After all, there was no way Felix would make it out of this place alive.

Not if Changbin and the others were going to survive.

Just then, his eyes were averted as he saw Jisung stand and stretch his legs before heading over to sit by him. He sat with a loud sigh, leaning his head back against the cool tiles, glancing over at Felix.

"How are you holding up?" he asked.

Felix shrugged.

"Feeling pretty shitty. How about you?"

"Oh the shittiest."

Felix laughed softly. But his expression sank.

"I'm really sorry, Han. You guys should've left me behind. I could've just stayed hidden."

"Yeah but you would've needed to move at some point to get food or water. And there were thousands of zombies in there."

"But all I did was slow you guys down. One life is worth a lot less than three."

Han turned to him and startled Felix by dealing a hard slap to his cheek.

"Don't fucking say that!"

Felix sat frozen, too stunned to speak. His hand reached up to his cheek.

"You're my fucking friend, Felix! Your life isn't fucking expendable! Just because we didn't find the others doesn't mean this was a failure! All three of us are alive! That's what fucking matters!"

Felix glanced around, noticing everyone had turned to stare. Changbin stood defensively, his arms tensed. But as their eyes met, he slowly relaxed, understanding Han was just trying to knock some sense into him.

"Could we not yell? Remember, zombies?" Jongho sighed from the opposite wall and Han nodded, his face flushing red.

"Right. Sorry."

"It's fine. I think Felix needed to hear that. Just-maybe at a lower volume."

Felix finally turned back to face Han who maintained a serious expression.

"I guess...I didn't really think about it like that," Felix said softly.

"You didn't think about how important you are to us!?" Han snapped, but kept his voice at a moderate volume.

"I just...I didn't think about how you guys would feel. I just wanted you to be safe. Even if it meant sacrificing my own safety."

"You can't just trade your life for ours, Felix. That's not how it works."

"You die, and the rest of us might as well be dead. Living without you would be fucking hell."

The two looked up as Changbin approached, his hands fidgeting in front of him. Felix looked up into his eyes and noticed small tears forming.

"Bin..."

Jisung scooted over as Felix invited Changbin to sit next to him, putting an arm over his shoulders. Changbin set his head on Felix's shoulder.

"I'll do everything I can to protect you, Lix. And I know, we can't predict what'll happen next. But I swear to you I'll protect you til the very end."

"You're not allowed to die either," Felix whispered, his hand reaching for Changbin's. He laced their fingers together and gave his hand a tight squeeze.

"I know, I'm not going to be reckless. And I know you don't want me worrying about you. And I've tried to be a good boyfriend and give you space and distance ever since your injury, I really have. But this is one time I can't give you what you want. Because I'm selfish. I can't afford to lose you, Lix."

"You're not selfish...you're just...stupid."

Changbin turned his head to look Felix in the eye, raising an eyebrow in surprise.

"Ya! You take that back!" he protested and Felix just laughed.

"Only an idiot would tell someone they aren't allowed to die when they clearly don't have any concern for their own life either."

"Fine...maybe I am stupid. But then...so are you."

"Me?"

"Yeah. Cuz you fell for me," Changbin grinned in amusement, wiggling his face towards Felix.

Felix rolled his eyes but a smile broke across his cheeks and he wrapped his arms around Changbin's neck and lifted himself into his lap. Just as he'd snuggled into place, Changbin enveloped him in his arms, and Felix finally felt his pulse calming down.

His breathing evened out as he let his eyes flutter shut, breathing in Changbin's scent. His face was nestled tightly against the somewhat damaged button down shirt, the material soft against his skin. Changbin rubbed his hand along Felix's back, pressing slightly as he gave him a gentle massage.

"You guys make me sick," Jisung sighed, standing and moving towards the other side of the bathroom. But Changbin grabbed his hand.

Felix turned to glance up at Han.

"You expect me to sit here and third wheel? To Changlix? Trust me if I've only got a few days left, there are many other things I'd rather be doing."

Jisung started to move again but Changbin held steady.

"Sit."

Jisung looked down at him.

"It's fine. I'm okay."

"Sit," Felix joined in, moving over a little to make room for Han.

Han looked down at them and Felix caught his lip tremble, just a little.

"Fine," he sighed, trying to seem nonchalant but Felix and Changbin pulled him into their hug, the three trying their best to find some semblance of comfort in their situation.

As much as Felix felt his fears washing away with the warmth of Changbin's presence, he couldn't help but feel another wave of guilt.

What if he slowed them down again? Next time...they might not be so lucky.

He would be putting everyone at risk.

If it came down to it, he would have to be willing to step up. He would have to make the sacrifice.

And he was willing.

If it meant everyone else would be safe.

He just wasn't sure that was the case anymore.

With the two of them getting so worked up about it, it was possible they might not be able to keep moving. They might drop back and try to stop him. What if he just ended up hurting them anyways?

He wasn't so sure it was still a valid last resort.

Maybe if he could find a way to leave before everyone else did, they wouldn't have a way of stopping him. He could silently save them the trouble of needing to look after him.

But...what if Changbin tried to go after him? All alone? Like the stubborn idiot he was...

Felix was realizing his actions would have much greater consequences than he'd anticipated. If he lost his life, Changbin might stupidly sacrifice his own in the process. And that was the opposite of what Felix was trying to accomplish.

So maybe a sacrifice wouldn't actually benefit anyone at all. Even if the group could move faster, how would they ever hold Changbin back?

"Lix...I love you. I don't say it enough."

Felix felt a rush of emotion come over him and his eyes filled with tears.

"I know you do. You don't have to say it. And I love you, too."

A comforting silence hung over the group as they nestled together, warmed by each other's presence.

"I love you, too, Changbin."

Han smiled brightly up at Changbin's scowl, receiving a patronizing flick to the forehead as Felix laughed.

"I'm gonna get you out of here. Both of you. Not matter what."

Felix wasn't so sure he could promise that. And to be honest, he almost wished he wouldn't. "Both of you" clearly didn't include Changbin. And if Felix had any say in the matter, Changbin would be the one walking out of here.

After all, he was their best hope for survival.