Kiara's POV:

I told the pogues once I was three months and they were all crying. It was like we would have some form of JJ still with us. My parents weren't happy about the baby but they saw how happy it made me. I made the decision to move out of their house and move into JJ's old house. The pogues all helped me clean it up, get new furniture, paint, and re-do the bedrooms.

It was super hard cleaning up JJ's room but I remembered how much pain he felt in here. I was taking Luke's room and the nursery was going to be the babies. I kept all of JJ's stuff, just in my room on what would be his side. I reached out to his mom and told her everything JJ wanted me to say and apparently she was at the funeral. I told her about the baby and she wanted to come to visit once the baby was born.

The pregnancy was flying by and Pope was in college, Cleo went with him and found a job, Sarah was going to NYU, and John B was still in town going to the local school to become a police officer. I got a shit ton of money from JJ's death, Luke's charges, and felonies that was supposed to go to JJ.

I was in the hospital, giving birth and I had the pogues in the room with me, but the only one I truly wanted there was JJ and they all knew that. It came time for me to actually deliver and Sarah was the only one who stayed. I gave birth to a healthy and beautiful baby. I was crying so hard. They cleaned the baby up and I got to hold my sweet baby. Sarah went out to get everyone and they all came in and saw the baby. They all started smiling and I said, "Meet our little boy.."

Cheers broke out in the room. There was no doubt in my mind that JJ sent me our little boy so I didn't have to be alone.

"What's his name?" Pope asked

I thought about it for a minute and the only name I had thought about for nine months was this, "Jackson James Maybank.."

Everyone loved it and Cleo asked, "Was that JJ's name?"

I shrugged and said, "I don't know what his name stood for but this way I will call my son Jackson but his name is still part of his dad with the two J's."

Sarah started crying and so did Pope. They all held baby Jackson and this was the happiest moment we've had in almost a year. My parents came to meet their grandson and they have honestly been amazing. It eventually was time to take the baby home. Sarah and John B picked us up and brought us home.

"Are you sure that you're going to be okay alone?" John B asked

"Yeah, I'll be just fine. I'm not alone anymore. But come over tomorrow morning." I said

I sat on the couch and held my son and I said, "I love you so much Jackson James and so does your daddy. You have the most amazing daddy in the whole wide world and I wish you were able to meet him. He was handsome, just like you are. Yeah, you got your looks from your dad. He was an amazing surfer and he was my best friend. He was so tough and strong. He was loyal and kind and he loved me so much. Just like I love you, so much.."

Jackson was now almost a month old and Jessica was coming to visit. She came to the house and said it looked beautiful inside and we made small talk while the baby slept. She told me all about JJ when he was a baby, why she left, how guilty she feels and how I told her it wasn't her fault. His mom was amazing and I wish he got to grow up with her. I made the decision that I wanted her in my life and in Jackson's. She might not have gotten to be JJ's mom, but she got a second chance with her grandson. I brought him out after his nap and her heart melted.

She spent three days in town with us and then she left. I started to regularly talk and text Jessica all the time. She became like a mom to me.

Today was the anniversary of JJ's death and the pogues all came over.

"So what should we do today to honor JJ?" Sarah asked

"We should do all our favorite things..." Pope said

John B started laughing and said, "I don't think he would want us all to have sex with Kie"

Everyone started laughing and Cleo said, "His favorite thing in the world was being with Kie..."

They all hugged me and we were going surfing. I decided to take JJ's board and we went to the ocean. It was a beautiful day and when I surfed, Sarah watched Jackson. He was three months old and he had a life jacket on. I was in knee-deep water sitting on my board and she brought him to me and I sat him in front of me and held onto him. We just sat there and floated like JJ and I used to. John B pushed up around the shallow area and that was Jackson's first time surfing. Cleo took lots of pictures.

We went to the Wreck for lunch and then went out on the HMS pogue. We went to the chateau and had a fire that night. Jackson was asleep inside and we were all talking about our favorite JJ memories. It was the perfect evening. I went home with my son and that's when I broke down. It has been a year since I've seen the love of my life. A year since I kissed him. I missed him so much. I put on a pair of his sweatpants and a shirt of his and I re-read the note he left over and over. I called John B and Pope and asked them to come over. They both came with Cleo and Sarah to spend the night. Pope, John B, Sarah, and Cleo all crawled onto my bed and I felt a lot less alone. Cleo took Jackson as he woke up wanting a bottle.

"Sarah, I'm sorry babe but I have to do this for JJ.." John B said laying down under the covers and pulling me into his arms so I laid on his chest

Sarah smiled at both of us knowing it meant nothing. Pope came and laid on the other side of me and hugged me. I must have fallen asleep because I woke up between John b and Pope and they were both awake. The girls must have the baby.

"You know JJ would kill both of you for being in bed with me" I joked

I felt much better today and thanked everyone for last night.

TIME JUMP - 10 years

Jackson was now ten years old and he was a mini JJ. Tonight, he was sad because he wished he got to meet his dad. So we did the next best thing. We got ready for bed and he came into bed with me and I went to old pictures and talked about JJ and the memories. Jackson loved this and he asked if he could sleep in my bed with me tonight as he was still sad. I loved the time I spent with him and of course, I said yes.

"You wanna know a big secret?" I asked and Jackson nodded his head yes

"So you have to promise not to tell anyone. Not even your uncles John B and Pope or auntie Sarah and Cleo. This is a secret that dad told only me. Promise?"

"I promise.." He said excitedly

"So you know how your name is Jackson James? Well, your dad's name is Jackson James but everyone just called him JJ since he was little. No one ever knew what the two J's stood for in his name. You are named after your dad."

Jackson got the biggest smile on his face and he was crying because he was so happy. I hugged my son and thought about JJ's letter. And I was keeping the promise of not telling anyone, but our son didn't count.

We continued to talk about JJ all the time. I think it helped both of us. Jessica would come to visit all the time and we've made a few trips to Montana to see her. The pogues all lived close by and we hung out all the time. John B and Pope were the best uncles to Jackson. And all their kids were like siblings to him. it was like we were one big family. JJ didn't leave me alone, he left me with our family.

I missed JJ like crazy but I could never replace him so I didn't date anyone and I won't ever because the only one I want is JJ. He told me he wanted me to move on so I wouldn't be alone. But I wasn't alone and I never would be. I had the pogues and I had our son, Jackson. We were finally giving JJ's childhood house the happy family JJ always wanted it to have. I just wish he could be part of it.