*TW*

Things where finally back to normal again. Sarah and John b we're back, school had started. It was finally just the pouges back to doing what ever they wanted.

It was the beginning of the weekend. John b and JJ where out on the boat going to pick up pope.

"Hey, so are we picking up kie today to?" JJ asked, nervous inside, but casual

"Yeaa?  Why?" John b asked.

"Oh nothin i was just asking" JJ said quickly to play it off.

When they arrived to the dock, pope was sitting there waiting. Kie had called things off with pope a while ago, but pope was still upset.

When pope got on the boat, John b and JJ tried to cheer him up but nothing was really working.
JJ felt bad for his friend, yet almost relieved. He didn't understand why he felt so weird. The whole ride to kies dock his head filled with thoughts trying to figure out this unfamiliar feeling he had felt these past few days.

They finally arrived to kies dock. JJ helped her on board like always and they took off.

The whole evening was a little awkward. Pope was uneasy and kie felt bad for him. but what made it the most weird, was that JJ was much quieter than he had always been.

They finally headed back to the chateau. When they got there, pope and JJ went inside while John b and kie waited for Sarah outside.

"Ok is it just me or was JJ acting totally weird today?" kie asked

"Uh yea actually he hasn't really been himself lately.. maybe he's still shook up from what all happened this summer." John b shrugged

"Yea.. maybe" kie said, stopping herself to hide her concern

Sarah finally arrived and they all went inside. Sarah and John b sat on the pull out couch while pope sat awkwardly at the table. The only other spot for JJ to sit was next to kie on the couch.

He practically had to force himself to sit down. He awkwardly shuffled to the couch. He didn't understand why all the sudden he got so tense around kie. His eyes darting every direction as he sat down slowly and uncomfortably next to her.

He was a nervous wreck. He bobbed his body up and down, trying to play it off cool. He had been so busy in mind trying to figure out why he felt this way, that he didn't notice everyone looking at him so weirdly.

There was a moment of silence where everyone just looked at each other and JJ until John b finally said "JJ you alright man?"

"Oh me? Yea yea I'm good bro" JJ said while looking around.

John b paused "alright?" He said confused

JJ tried his best to avoid eye contact with kie but it eventually happened.  Her eyebrows screamed with confusion. He looked away as fast as possible and shot up from the couch

" uhh we'll you know I'm getting tired" he says while clapping his hands "I'm just gonna.. yea im gonna go, to uhm bed" JJ darted down the hall to the spare bedroom he always slept in. his blonde messy hair rapidly moving as he hurried away.

"Okay what the fuck was that about?" Kie said almost scared for him

"Omg he's so nervous" Sarah giggled teasing him

JJ could still hear them as he made his way through the house. He shut the door fast and sat down on the bed. He hated feeling like this. He just wanted to understand why she made him feel so shaky. He knew he had to get his shit together or they'd start asking him. And the last thing he wanted was to talk about feelings.

After a while the conversation had changed and the rest of the pouges had forgotten what happened with JJ. But kie couldn't seem to get it off her mind. She sat on the couch zoned out in thought. Things were so weird.

"Kie!" John b asked bringing her back down to earth "you good?"

"Yea I'm fine" she said shaking her head "I'm just a little buzzed right now. I should probably get some sleep"

Kie made her way out to the hammock, the island breeze felt so good on her skin. She sat down in the hammock looking up at the stars. She couldn't stop thinking about the way JJ was acting. She normally wouldn't care but for some reason it's all she could think about. She didn't want anything bad to happen anymore.

Soon, everyone else had fallen asleep. John b and Sarah were in his bed and pope crashed on the couch. JJ still couldn't fall asleep. He just stayed in the room with the door shut, looking up at the ceiling.

He decided he needed some fresh air, and sense he hadn't heard anyone in a while, he assumed they were all asleep. He quickly and quietly snuck out of the house. When he got outside he heard a familiar voice from up ahead.

"JJ?" Kie whispered, hoping it was him.

JJ looked around, confused in the dark trying to find out where she was, until quickly realizing she was in the hammock.

"Hey kie" he said painfully though his breath while slowly walking up to the hammock.

Kie scooted over in the hammock, casually offering him to lay next to her. He smoothly layed opposite of her.

"Are you okay?" She asked softly "you've been acting kinda weird lately"

JJ paused a moment trying to come up with a good lie " yea I'm all good" was all he could manage to get out.

"Are you sure?" Kie asked

"Yes. Kie. I'm fine." JJ said almost getting frustrated at the repeated question

JJ all the sudden felt angry, he hated this confusing feeling and he wanted to block it out the only way he knew how.

"Hey so that was real nice what you did with pope" he said, his tone changing.

"What are you talking about?" Kie asked getting defensive

"He's all sad because of you now" he paused " I mean honestly what the hell did you do to him" JJs voice started to get louder.

"JJ what the hell?" She said matching his tone. "Why are you getting mad at me all the sudden?"

"because you always do this!" He yelled, his voice beginning to get scratchy.  "you acted like you LIKED JOHN B TOO and then YOU-" she cuts him off "WHY ARE YOU BRINGING THIS BACK UP THAT WAS FOREVER AGO" they begin yelling at each other back and forth to where non of them could even hear what the other was saying anymore. They were both standing up now and started arguing about anything and everything.

John b ran outside wondering what all the noise was about.

"HEY!" He yelled to get there attention " what the hells going on?" He asked in a calmer tone

They both stop and stare at him for a minute in silence. What had they been fighting about?

"Nothing." JJ says cold in the voice as he stomps past John b, running himself into his shoulder.

"Ughh" Kie says in disgust as to the way JJ was acting

"Okay what the hell is going on?" John b asked confused out of his mind.

"I don't even know. he just came out here and picked a fight" she takes a deep breath "I don't know what's been going on with him."

"It's JJ" John b sighs "probably just has shit going on, he'll calm down eventually"

The next morning the pouges loaded up in the boat and headed down the marsh to fish. Nothing had been resolved from last night. JJ and kie never talked it out. they just made non stop passive aggressive comments towards each other. JJ would pick a fight over everything with her that day.

Night was creeping up and the other pouges were fed up with there non stop bickering. They dropped off pope and kie and headed back to the chateau.
JJ sat there quiet, knowing his best friend would soon ask him the impossible questions

"JJ-   John b began to say but JJ quickly cut in

"Look.  I know.. alright, I'm an ass" JJ says, annoyed with himself

"Seriously bro what's going on with you?" John b asked

"I don't knoww ok." JJ said scared for the future conversation "I just- I don't know." JJ stared off into the distance, refusing eye contact.

"Okay well what ever it is.. figure it out." John b said "this.. "fight" or whatever with you and kie, can't keep going on."

"I know bro" JJ said as they pulled up to the dock

JJ was so tired of this. The last thing he wanted to do was fight with her. He hated seeing her mad and upset but he couldn't help it. He didn't know what else to do.

JJ wanted to make things right so he picked up his phone to call her, but he couldn't.

                                   Kie🤙🏻:
JJ: hey..
JJ: I'm sorry kie
JJ: I've been an ass

                                           Yea you really have :Kie🤙🏻

                                         What's been going on :Kie🤙🏻                         
                                          With You JJ, seriously.  

JJ: I don't know kie
We'll talk about it later
(Read: 12:04)

The next morning JJ woke up early to run to his house to get his lighter he had dropped last time he was there. He knew his dad never woke up early so the chances of him being passed out on the couch were high.

When he got to his house he saw that he was right. His dad covered in sweat and surrounded by beer bottles snoring away on the couch. JJ quickly walked past him in disgust. He went out back to look for his lighter in the grass when he felt a hand press against his shoulder.

He turned around to see his now very much awake dad

"What the hell are you doing here boy" Luke said almost yelling   " didn't I tell you not to come back here you little shit" his voice getting more and more aggressive.

"I was just coming to get something relax" JJ tried to  not let the fear show in his voice

With out warning Luke hit him so hard in the face he fell to the ground

JJ quickly grabbed his lighter, kicked his dad off of him and walked away after remembering they had school today.

The rest of the walk to school JJ filled with anger. He wanted so badly to go back and finish what his dad had started. He didn't want to let his friends down though. So he sucked it up and went to school.

When he got there, kie stopped him in the courtyard

"Hey that was some apology last night" she teased him. She didn't think he'd be mad at her anymore since he texted. 

"Not now kie." He told her as he marched into to the building.

She turned around and watched him walk away. She scoffed and rolled her eyes before heading to her class.

On his way to class, he was filled with regret. He didn't want to be mad at kie anymore but he couldn't help it. His dad had pissed him off already and he just couldn't deal with the weird unfamiliar emotions on top of that right now. 

By the end of the day, the bruise his dad left on his eye had settled in. The group all loaded up in the Twinkie

"Omg JJ what happened to your eye?" Pope asked in a panic tone

Kie turned so fast to make sure he was okay but couldn't ask because she knew they were still fighting

"Oh yea, had a bit of a stir up with the old man this morning before school" JJ said jokingly "it's not that bad though"

Kie hated to see JJ hurt like that. But was to stubborn to say something

Kie and JJs eyes meet from across the van. JJ quickly looked away. Scared that she might see straight through him.

The whole group hated what happened to JJ but knew this was nothing new to him

After a week of passive aggression, fighting, bickering, and annoyance between kie and JJ the rest of the group grew to be seriously concerned. They were over it. JJ was always the one to start it too. He used to just mess with her by making sexual jokes towards her but this was way different. He was actually mad. But they didn't know why.

The weekend began again and the pouges were getting ready to go to a party. This party happened every year and everyone was invited.

JJ felt like shit. He knew he had been an awful friend lately and letting out his emotions through anger wasn't working for this. It didn't make him feel better.

On there way to the party, JJ was no longer picking fights with Kiara. Instead he just sat there in silence and kie sat there confused.

They arrived to the party and JJ went directly to drinking.  He was sure that this would make the feeling go away.  Drinking had always worked.

After an hour into the party he was already extremely drunk, but so was everyone. He wasn't his normal bounce off the walls drunk though. He just kept pacing back and forth and zoning out. 

From across the crowed he could see a guy getting very close with kie.  It was obvious she was uncomfortable. Just the sheer thought of anyone making her feel that way made him unexplainably angry. He tried to keep his distance, watching her to make sure he didn't try anything. The guy briefly grabbed kies wrist aggressively, and the second JJ saw, he ran up and pushed him off of her.

"JJ WHAT THE HELL?!" Kie yelled. She didn't see him come up at all

" BACK THE FUCK UP MAN" JJ yells while grabbing the guy by his shirt

" relax dude, she knows she wants me" the guy says looking at kiara like she's a desert.

JJ still holding on to his shirt with one hand, punches him in the face leaving him with a bleeding lip.

"JJ!" Kie yelled, scared that the situation might get worse

"Do you want to fucking fight man" the guy asked, clearly wasted

The guy tried to stand back up but JJ pounds him in the face two more times as hard as he could

"JJ OH MY GOD! STOP!" Kie yelled

Sarah and John b arrived to see what was going on.

"JJ stop it. Calm down" Sarah said pulling at his shoulder "this kind of thing happens all the time. He didn't do anything, it's okay, calm dow. "

Everyone was so confused. Why did he care so much, he practically acted like he hated her all week. And then all the sudden he gets mad over some drunk guy touching Kie for less than a second. That happened all the time.

JJ stood there over him laying on the ground in pain, listening to what Sarah was saying and breathing heavily. She was right. Piggish Guys hit on kie all the time. Why did he care now.

He said nothing and stormed away. He looked almost paranoid has made his way through the crowed.

Kie stood there shocked and confused. JJ had never acted like this before. She saw him walk into the pool house and began to follow him.

JJ shut the door and started pacing. He couldn't breathe he was so mad. He was mad at the guy. He was mad at himself.  He was mad at kie for making him feel like this.

Kie ran into the empty pool house after him. He hadn't noticed she was there, and continued to pace and mumble to himself. Kie had never seen him so mad over what appeared to be nothing.  All his anger just built up.

"JJ WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT ABOUT?!" Kie yelled

JJ turned around surprised to see her standing there.

"I- I- I don't know kie" he said frantically "he just was.. like" he paused to find the right words. "like touching you?" He said, unsure of what he was even saying himself. He knew he wasn't making any sense

"JJ calm down it's okay" she ran over to him and hugged his neck "I'm fine"  she says reassuring him.

He felt her warm skin against his and it made him automatically feel better.. but pushed her off almost immediately.

"NO STOP- don't-   Don't do" he starts breathing heavily again "don't do that."

Anytime she got close it made the feeling 10 times stronger. He didn't know what else to do.

"JJ WHAT DID I DO??" Kie yells clearly over it. "WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS SO MAD AT ME?"

JJ still pacing, turns his head and looks at her.

He Felt a sudden sense of clarity. Like he finally realized why. He stopped pacing and just stared at her. At that moment, he knew exactly why.

"I SERIOUSLY DID NOTHING TO YOU" Kie continued "THERE IS NO REASON FOR YOU T-"

JJ hastily walks up to her, looking her dead in the eyes as he quickly slides his hand around her waist pulling her in close and simultaneously sliding his other hand under her ear keeping his thumb on her cheek.

He had never touched her in this way before. It felt so right to him. She looked up at him and froze. The eye contact was strong. She didn't know Her best friend could look at her like that. She felt scared and safe at the same time. She didn't know what was going to happen next. would he try to kiss her? She places her hand on his arm that was on her waist. He didn't expect her to embrace him back.

After almost 10 seconds of this moment, JJ quickly pulls back. He remembered how awkward it was for John b and pope afterwards. The last thing he wanted was for her to be mad at him. So he pulled away.  It took all his strength. His heart beating faster than ever. He hated feeling that vulnerable with his best friend.

"Oh my god." He paused, avoiding eye contact. "I- I'm sorry kie, I didnt mean to-" he says awkwardly beginning to pace again

"jj?" Kie says softly and in shock

"Kie I know that was dumb, I know. Okay I know" JJ starts rambling. "so let's just move on with our lives and pretend it never happened, okay beca-"

Kie walks up to him and grabs his arms so that he stays still. His eyes darting around the room and his breathing heavy. Kie places her hand flat on his chest.

JJ begins to calm down. His eyes now focused on her, and what she's doing and his breathing slows.

Once he stops panicking kiara slowly brings JJs hand back down to her waist the way he had it before. As if she was trying something.

"Kie" JJ says through his breathe "you don't have to-" he didn't want her to feel like she had to do this to make him feel better.

"JJ" she paused "I know." Kie looked into his eyes. She felt something she'd never felt before. With him, in this moment, It felt so right. She never thought JJ would actually feel this way towards her. She also never thought she would feel the same way back.

Truth is, she always had some sort of a thing for JJ, but she knew how he was. She knew he didn't do relationships like that, so she never let herself feel what her heart wanted to feel for him. She just pushed it down and ignored it.

But now that he was there in front of her, his lips only inches away. Maybe it was just the beers talking but she couldn't ignore the feelings I'm that moment.

JJ broke eye contact and zoned out to her lips for a minute. He wanted her so badly. She noticed him staring at her lips. She slowly slid her hands onto the rim of his jeans resting them there.

He wraps his arm tighter around her waist and pulls her in close. His other hand on the back of her head tangled up in her beautiful brown curls.

He looks back up to her eyes and then back down to her lips. He puts his forehead against hers and is calmed by her breathe against his. He lifts her chin up and slowly opens his lips

And then that moment. In that moment everything was okay. Nothing mattered. All that they cared about was the moment. It finally made sense. Everything did.  

He pressed his lips into hers. Them slowly closing in on each other. They moved their mouths in such rhythm. His tongue slowly leading its way into her mouth. Her mouth inviting it in. She slides her hand up his neck into his blonde locks. The other on his shoulder.

They pull away for a second and look into each other's eyes, silently confirming that they were going to do this. Every thing made sense now. It felt so unfamiliar. Her best friend kissing her like that. It was so much more real than anyone else she'd kissed before. Maybe it was all the history.

After staring into each others eyes for a while they couldn't resist anymore. JJ pulls kie back in and passionately kissed her again. He guides her head with his hand. Their heads bobbing back and forth with their kiss. He's wanted this for so long and he didn't even know it. They started kissing faster. They began breathing harder.

JJ pushes her back against a wall aggressively. But kie wanted it. She's pinned against the wall by JJ. She never thought this would happen. He begins sliding down, kissing her on her jaw and slowly going down to her neck.  He knew what he wanted. She's breathing heavier than before. Her heart beating fast. He starts sucking on her neck. He didn't want to give her a hickey and have the others find out, but he just couldn't control himself. He wanted her so bad. He kissed around some more on her neck until latching on like a parasite and leaving a Hickey for sure. She didn't want to stop him though. It felt so good.

He slid his hands to her thighs, lifting her up with ease and setting her on the counter. She now sat straddling his torso. They continued to make out like there was no tomorrow. Like they had been holding back for so long.

This was a side of JJ she had never seen before. He wasn't his usual goofy self.  He was serious and passionate. She loved it.

Kie began to fidget with JJs shirt. Pulling at it. She wanted it to come off. JJ went back down to her neck. The feeling made her let out the smallest moan but that was enough for JJ. He needed her. He started getting more aggressive and kie liked it. She couldn't hold back anymore. She pulls at his shirt trying to get it off. He notices and allows it.

She ripped his shirt off leaving him with only his jeans left. She runs her hands around his warm muscular back. JJ slides his hand up her shirt this time instead of on the outside of it. He knows she's wearing her new bikini and he wants to see.

His tongue began thrusting in and out of her mouth with lip kisses in the middle. There tongues tangled up with each other as they made out. No one had ever kissed her this way.

He starts lifting at her shirt, seeing if she wants it to come off. JJ pauses for a split second, looks her in the eyes and slowly lifts her arms all the way up. While he slowly grabs the bottom of her t shirt and slides it up, he kisses her slowly. He takes her shirt completely off while looking her in the eye. As soon as it's off JJ pulls her back in to kiss her.

He loves the way she looked in the bikini. He couldn't help but mumble the word "beautiful" under his breath. She heard this and it made her feel a jolt of happiness strike through her body. He slid his face down and layed it on her chest looking down. The top of his head against her jaw.Her skin was so smooth. He held her tight for a moment, thinking of how lucky he was. He started kissing her neck again but closer to the collar bone this time. She let out a another soft moan. He slid his hand down her body and stopped at her hips and just felt her move with his kisses.

The counter she was on was too high so he picked her up again and took her to the island In the middle of the kitchen. Her legs wrapped around him tight. She couldn't help but notice how strong he was. He picked her up with such ease. He sat her down and slowly leaned her back. Her back arched, He slid his calloused hand firmly from her stomach slowly up to her chest. He grabbed her through the bikini and kept his hand there feeling her while they continued to kiss.

It felt so good to her.

He leaned more on top of her. His chain hanging down as their lips wouldn't separate. JJs tongue moving around in her mouth. He pushed Her back fully on the counter. He slid his kisses back down to her neck and slowly, making sure she was okay with it, made his way down to her chest. He pulls back her bathing suit gently as if he were unwrapping a present, not completely taking it off yet, and begins to open mouth kiss her on her breast. Her legs wide open to let him lean on top of her. Her hands playing with his blonde hair while he pleases her. A slight moan makes him kiss more aggressively. She sees what she's doing to him and she likes it. He moves cautiously to her other breast. He begins to kiss it while squeezing the other one. He went back up to her neck. Leaving another hickey for sure. He occasionally goes back up to kiss her lips and then goes back down.

The bathing suit strap is off her shoulder and lose but not completely off. While going back up to her mouth quickly. Kie slowly begins to lift up moving with his kisses. She's sitting up, straddling him and kissing him passionately. She pulls back for a minute and looks him in the eyes. He goes back in to kiss her because he just can't get enough but she pulls her head back.

JJ looks at her like he's hungry for more. They look at each other now out of the moment to realize what they were doing. she slowly goes back in to kiss him but he aggressively slams his mouth and body into hers. They knew what they were doing and they liked it. This is so hot to her. He's so passionate. She never knew this about JJ. and she loved it. And wanted more. She lets out another moan and JJs kisses grew faster, holding her body. She slides her hands down his chest and to his belt. He noticed what she was doing and pulled his head back for a split second and let out a small but amazing little grin. He didn't want to show his excitement for what she was doing.

She pulled on his belt at first and then undid it as he slowly leaned her back down. She undid his button and frantically ripped down his zipper. He let out another small smile and so did she after seeing his small cute smile. He wasn't just a play boy. This actually meant something to him. And kie knew that, and that made her feel good.

They begin passionately making out while JJ occasionally fidgets with her bikini and kie fidgets at his belt. But just before things got any hotter...

Kies head is turned facing the door to their right while JJs head is buried in her neck. Her eyes were closed but when she opened them she saw John b who had just walked in to see what was taking so long. He sat there in such shock.

He walks in to find his best friend, who he'd known since 3rd grade. Shirtless with his pants undid, passionately kissing and holding his girl best friends body who is only in what is now a loose bikini since JJ is so aggressive, holding on to his hair while she is straddling him.

"Oh my god!" Kie yells after making eye contact with John b.

JJ looks up at her frantically, thinking he did something wrong. and sees where her eyes are pointing and then looks at John b.

"Oh myy gOd" he says, feeling his heart sink to the ground out of embarrassment. Everything was real again. All the problems came rushing back in.

Kie scoots back, holding her bathing suit to make sure it doesn't fall, and closes her legs. While JJ tries so hard to hide his belt being undone.  He stares at him with his eyes wide open.  JJ could not believe his friend saw him like this. He hated getting caught like that.

"Wh- uhh wow." John b says in disbelief.  He never would have pictured them together. He has seen him kiss many other girls before and he's seen kie kiss many other guys before, but something about seeing his two best friends. He never would have thought her and JJ would do that.

"Well uhh.. I'm gonna.. I'm gonna go now" John b says while turning around to walk away. As he turns around, JJ who is now leaning on the counter, looking down in embarrassment, his hair messy. Turns his head to him and puts his finger up to his mouth, telling him not to tell the others. JJ didn't want everyone knowing and neither did kie. 

Now that the tension was gone the real stuff happened again. JJ was terrified that the same thing that happened to pope and John b would have happened to him. He painfully went to go find their shirts and fixed his belt. He knew kie would be mad. He moseyed over to give kie her shirt back and they both stared at each other, knowing that if Pope finds out, then it's gonna be bad. They were ashamed

How did they let themselves go like that. They felt the lack of self control flurry inside of them. But.. were they upset with what they did.. or just that they got caught..

JJ couldn't face Pope right now, so he just sat down against the wall. Kie went to sit down next to him. JJ was surprised. He thought she'd wanna leave. But she didn't. They both looked at each other with sorry faces.

"Kie.. what if Pope finds out" JJ paused "I don't think he'll forgive me"

Kie thought for a minute "let's just not tell anyone until he's over it" she's says slowly "I don't like it either, but it will be better for him."

JJs face relaxes "yea you're right"

"Do you think John b is gonna tell them" kiara asks worryingly

"Nah I think we'll be okay" JJ says

Kie looked up at JJ, meeting with his eyes. JJ doesn't break eye contact until he looks down and slowly grabs kies hand, hoping she won't freak out. And she didn't. Instead she just smiled and squeezed his hand back.

He was beyond relieved. All he wanted was to be with her. He still thought for sure eventually when they had sobered up that she would be mad. He started replaying what had happened in his head.  He loved it.

Eventually they had to go back out to the party. They weren't fighting anymore so everyone just assumed that's why they were gone for so long. That they were talking and making up.

On the ride home from the party. Kie and JJ sat across from each other in the van. They kept looking up at each other, and Sarah got a little suspicious.

Once JJ and John b finished dropping everyone off, it was just them in the van.

"So.. uhm,   Are weee.. gonna talk about.. that?" John b said unsure of why he was even asking.

"Listen man" JJ sighed "I really didn't mean for that to happen"

"For what to happen" john b asked

"For any of it to happen" JJ said uncomfortably

"I just- I didn't know you liked her like that" john b said surprised

"I Didn't!" JJ said defensively "I don't!"
"I don't know"
"I hate that you saw me like that man" JJ said insecurely

"Like what" john b asked

"Like.. ioknow exposed? Maybe?... vulnerable. I dunno" JJ says quickly and cringed at himself, hoping John b didn't just hear that.

"Jay it's fine if you like her" John b said knowing that this would be a hard topic for JJ.

"No- dude relax.  I don't LIKE her I was just drunk" JJ lies "we were both drunk it didn't mean anything" he paused " it's not gonna happen again man don't worry." JJ sighs.  He still assumed that kie doesn't actually want him that way.

"Are you sure it meant nothing?" John b asks for reassurance.

"Yea man, I was honestly so drunk I barely even knew it was her." JJ says sadly as they get out of the van and head inside.

"Oh sure" John b says sarcastically. A small chuckle leaving his mouth.

JJ started to panic inside. He needed John b to believe that there was nothing going on. He started to get mad.

"No I'm serious bro" JJ says frantically

"And.. I believe you" John b said, sarcastic again.

JJ grabs John b by the shirt aggressively, trying to make him know this wasn't funny. John just calmly looked at, him knowing what he was thinking. John b could read him like a book.

"I'm serious." JJ says looking him in the eyes that were humoring him.

"Whatever man" John b says. He lightly pushes him off and JJ let's go.

They walk into the chateau, JJ breathing heavy. He knew John b knew. John b knew better than he even did himself. JJ layed In bed scared for tomorrow. He knew kie would be mad at him when she sobered up. She'd probably make some dumb excuse how he took advantage of her or something. He wasn't ready for that long fight. But In his mind it was worth it. He couldn't get enough. He wanted her again so badly. He wasn't finished and was scared he'd never get a chance to.

The next day, JJ wanted to go see kiara but didn't. He wanted her again so badly but knew he wouldn't get her. They didn't see each other again until school the next day. JJ walked in to see kie already sitting down. He avoided eye contact with her, as he made his way to his seat. He could feel her eyes on him.

Kie looked forward to listen to the teacher and JJ just zoned out, unintentionally staring at her. He kept getting flash backs of the other night. She kept almost looking back and JJ noticed.

Once the lesson was over, Kiara turned slightly, accidentally making eye contact with JJ. It wasn't as awkward as they had both thought it would be. It was more of a- they both wanted each other again- look. JJ sat up in his chair when she looked at him, thinking one of them might say something. But didn't.

The bell rang and the day went on. After school, everyone got in the Twinkie. JJ got dibs on the front seat next to John b so that the others wouldn't see how much he wanted her.

They hadn't talked sense that night. They kept looking at each other in pain. And soon, some of the other pogues began to notice.

"Kie!" Sarah called out to pull her aside after they got out of the van.

JJ heard this, and he knew exactly what she was going to ask. He wanted to know what kie said, but couldn't look obvious, so he just went inside. Hoping Sarah would tell him later.

"Yea?" She tried to ask innocently, knowing they had been too obvious.

"Kie am i crazy? What happened with you and JJ at the party? Because y'all keep looking at each other like you did something bad." Sarah said

Kie just looked at her and tried to come up with something.

"Whaat are you talking about?" she asks slowly to stall "nothing happened"

"He hit a guy for touching you and then y'all disappeared." Sarah says "something is obviously happening.. are y'all still fighting?"

"Uh- yea.. we never really uh- look I gotta study for the history test, okay it's really not important" Kie said, not knowing what else to do.

Kie walks away into the house. JJ went out to the porch at the same time. She tried to avoid eye contact but he starred at her the whole time. They awkwardly moved past each other in the doorway. JJs eyes following her as she walked in. When he looked back up, he saw Sarah standing close to him.

"JJ.." she asks, trying not to spook him.

His eyes begin to go in every direction except hers. He gets nervous. He knows she's gonna ask him, so he does the only thing he could think of off the top of his head.

"Hey princess" he says while sliding past her and turning back around to face her "be right back" he lies nervously. It was obvious he was hiding something. He turns around and walks away to the hammock where he stayed for the rest of the evening.

Kie noticed where he was and wanted nothing more than to go join him. She couldn't keep doing this though. She had to got talk to him.

It was dark now and windy. He layed there looking at the water. His hair blowing in the wind.

"Hey JJ" she says casually with an undertone of awkward.

He turns around and sits up, surprised to see her there.

"hey kie, what's wrong?" he asks, confused but relieved that she was talking to him.

"Nothings wrong" she shrugged softly. "I just feel like we need to talk.. yk , about the other night."

"Oh yeaa I mean" JJ says, panicking. "We we're both super drunk yk.  it was nothing." He assumed he was doing her a favor. Like he was making it easier on her. So she wouldn't have to 'let him down easy'.

Kiara paused. She just stood there looking at him.

"Yea yea I know.. it was nothing" she says, shaking her head trying to convince herself. She really thought it had meant something to him. Maybe he was just drunk. Maybe he just wanted to get layed.

Her heart sunk. She was devastated. If it meant nothing to him, then why had he still been acting so weird? She felt angry. She was mad that she let herself be vulnerable around him. How could he be such a dick.

"Look it doesn't have to be weird yk. It's never gonna happen again, right so we're fine." JJ says, almost passive aggressively. He couldn't let her know that it meant something to him.

"Right." She says staring into his eyes, heart broken.

She didn't understand how. She thought back to their moment at the party. Everything replayed in her head. It felt like so much. The way he looked at her. The way he held her. How was that nothing?

Kie walked away, clearly upset. JJ stayed on the hammock, regretting everything.

Throughout the next week, kie and JJ didn't really talk. And when they did, it was because they were arguing about something. Kie was mad at him for acting like she was special. Like maybe they had something. Then treating her like she was just another girl to him.

The next weekend, JJ got a call from his dad. Luke needed him to bring him some gas money.

JJ didn't know what else to do, so he loaded up on his bike and headed Luke's way. He hated his dad but still couldn't leave him hanging. He arrived to the gas station and handed Luke a 20

"A 20?" Luke asked, pissed "after all I've done for you? you give me a goddam 20?.. AFTER ALL THE SHIT YOU PUT ME THROUGH?"

"DAD it's all I HAD" JJ says, knowing he'll never be good enough for his dad, so why try.

"Gimmie that you little shit.. now get on out of here!" Luke says while snatching the bill out of his hands.

JJ was not good enough for his dad and never would be and he knew it. He got back on his bike, piping mad.

He started speeding off. Half way to the chateau he lost control of his bike. He slammed straight into a tree, hitting his face.

"FUCK!" he grunts, kicking his bike. Suddenly all the pain and feelings from the last two weeks all crept up on him at once. He ripped his bike up from the ground and drove away with blood dripping down his face.

Kie later got to the chateau, finding JJ wasted in the yard. She quickly went inside without JJ seeing her and watched him from the window, making sure he didn't hurt himself.

Once it got dark. John b and Pope joined him outside. They were all sitting by the fire drinking. JJ had been drinking since 11:00 in the afternoon. He was cross faded more than he had been in a while. Sarah and kie sat inside watching the boys be dumb.

"Is JJ okay?" Sarah asks Kie "he doesn't normally get this drunk"

"I don't even know anymore" Kie said with a sigh.

"Mm, well I'm gonna go join the boys, you comin?" Sarah asks

"Uh.. yea I will in a little bit." Kie says innocently. She smiled and Sarah went out the door.

It was just Kie inside now.

Around the fire place, JJ was making an absolute fool of himself. He had done the only thing that he thought would work to drown out the pain.

"I- ight y'all's I gotta go (burps) get another one " JJ stutters as he stumbles to the porch.

John b watched him, disappointed but not surprised. He got concerned because he knew kie was still in there. It would just be Kie and JJ inside and John b assumed they would start another fight.

JJ stumbled into the house. He heads down the hallway and meets Kie there. Kie can tell that he is completely wasted. He smells like his dad.

Kiara looks at him in disgust and concern. He froze, not expecting her to be there. She moves over to let him go.  JJ walks by, keeping eye contact as if he's going to pass her, but then locks his arm to the wall so that she can't get by. 

He looks at her in the eyes, as he adjusts his wobbly body towards her. He gently slides his hand on her lower back again like he had had it that past night. He puts his head against hers. He let out a painful sigh as he just felt her presence and realized how much better she made him feel. without thought he tries to force a kiss.

"JJ you're drunk" Kie says trying to push him back

"Kiara pleeaase" he slowly whisperers as he goes back in to kiss her. His eyes were sad and dull. He wanted to feel what he felt at the party again. He hated feeling this lonely. 

"JJ stop" she says while trying to pull his arms off.

"Please" he whispers again with a weak choked up voice. His nose touching hers he goes in for another kiss. Kie accepts it at first but knows he's drunk and doesn't know what he's doing.

"JJ!" She says firmly while trying to get him off of her. His drunk wobbling body leaned against her so he doesn't fall. He keeps forcing kisses. He never looks her in the eyes. His eyes were closed letting out small uncontrollable tears.

"JJ no" she says turning her head so he couldn't kiss her anymore. That doesn't stop him though. He goes down to her neck, kissing it like he'd done before. His hand smoothly but firmly holding her neck in place. Her pinned against the wall, she couldn't go anywhere. He starts sucking passionately on to her neck again. He didn't want to stop.

"Please,. Please,. Please,." JJ kept mumbling under his breath as he kissed her. Tears running down his face.

She liked it and didn't want to pull away but knew he was drunk. She wished he would do this when he was sober and in the right state of mind. She couldn't tell if he was being serious about it meaning nothing now. He said it himself, but why would he do it again. Either way, he was in no state to make that decisions himself. 

She tried to push him off again but he was too strong. His body pushing into her since he couldn't stand straight. He starts to pull her body closer to him. She started to get a little scared.

"Jay. Stop." She says, pushing him off harder.

"KIARA!" He yells, pain in his voice, tears all down his cheek as he slams his fist into the wall next to her. His blonde messy hair shaking as he got aggressive.

"Pleaseeee" he says in a quieter tone, his voice cracking as he begins to sob.

He starts slowly falling to his knees and she goes down with him, hugging his neck.

"Shhh it's okay" she says while holding him as he drunkenly sobbed. "Its okayy"

Once JJ calmed down and almost fell asleep in her arms, Kie helped him to his feet. She walked him to his bed and layed him down. She put a blanket on him and wiped away the tears that stayed on his cheeks.

JJ looked at her with tired eyes. He didn't want her to go. He wanted her to hold him. But he was so tired he couldn't talk.

She looked at him with his eyes half open, trying to stay awake to see what she did next. 

"stay." he mumbled

She puts her head against his "it's okay JJ" she says looking at his beautiful face. She turns the lights off and leaves his room quietly.

She knew that if he remembered what happened tomorrow, he would absolutely hate himself. He's not a pushy guy. If a girl tells him to stop he stops. But he didn't this time. Kie hated seeing him sad. She always hated when he was hard on himself. And she knew he would be about this.

Two hours later, Kie went outside and sat on the hammock to think about what had happened. Everyone else had gone inside now. John b saw that Kie was upset about something. He wanted to make sure nothing had happened, But him and kie hadn't talked about what happened at the party yet

John b saw her sitting in the hammock, but decided not to ask. Not yet at least

An hour later, JJ slowly woke up. The events that happened that night began flushing through his head. He remembered everything. He stood up furious at himself.

He started walking around his room, continuing to get flash back of that night. He was so mad at what he did to her. He never wanted her to be in that situation.

He got so mad he punched the wall again, this time stronger, breaking the wood, completely busting a hole in it.

Kiara heard this loud bang from outside. She was still awake and immediately knew who it was. She knew JJ was mad at himself. She wanted to give him a minute to cool off. She felt sorry for him. Yes, he was pushy but he was also in pain. In her eyes, She knew that moment had meant something to him.

He started sweating and cursing. He had never hated himself more. He needed to find her and make sure that she was okay. He needed to make sure he was remembering everything. He hoped he didn't hurt her. He didn't think he was capable of hurting her, but he also didn't think he would get pushy with her. He HAD to make sure.

He stumbled around in the dark to the door. He walked outside, hoping she'd fallen asleep in the hammock.

"JJ?" Kie said looking at the shadowy figure.

"Kie. Kie are you okay?" he said, ashamed and frantic. " I didn't mean to- I'm so sorry, I didn-"

He starts breathing heavily.

"JJ" she says standing up to go see him. "It's okayy" she says reassuringly

"No- Kie no it's not okay.. don't say that that's okay. Its not... it's not-" he says, freaking out.

"JJ I'm fine. Okay you didn't do anything." She said, walking closer to him.

She steps into the moonlight and he can see her face. Her voice calms him down a little but he's still panicking.

"You didn't do anything." She says again, hoping he'll calm down.

He stands there looking into her eyes, his face filled with regret. He glanced over to her neck where he had forcibly left a hickey. She hadn't had time to cover it up with make up yet.

He stands there staring at what he did to her. She noticed what he was looking at and covered it up with her hand. She walked closer to him holding her hand there.

"JJ no it's okay" she says, going up to him and wrapping her arms around his neck.

"Look what I did to you." He said, his voice beginnings to shake even more.

He winced into her shoulder. He was weak and vulnerable. Something he wasn't often. He felt so bad. He didn't dare touch her In anyway that wasn't pure for the rest of the night.

She stroked his hair, trying to get him to calm down. She didn't want him to feel bad about it.

He woke up that morning laying next to her in the hammock. He didn't know how he got there, he just remembered what he had done.

He had completely sobered up now so he was better at hiding how he felt about the situation.

Kie began to wake up next to him. Once Kie opened her eyes JJ looked at her.

"Kie.. I-" JJ says until she cuts him off

"JJ... i told you. It's okay. Nothing happened. It's okay." She said, smiling.

His eyes wander back down to the mark he had left on her neck. He began to frown. He gently trailed his finger on the mark as if he were trying to wipe it off.

"Cmon," Kie said quickly "we need to get up before anyone sees" she said while gently tapping JJ out of the hammock.

John b took everyone to school that morning. JJ of course, hung over, fell asleep on the ride there.

When they got to history class, JJ and kie kept making eye contact through out the entire class period. When the bell rang, Kie walked over to his desk.

"JJ." She says looking him in the eyes. "Stop feeling bad, I'm okay. you didn't do anything"

"Oh really?.. i didn't do anything.?" He says looking over to where he had left the hickey. It was gone though. she had covered it up with makeup. He paused, realizing what she had to do because of him. He starts blinking more holding back the tears that would have fell if he were alone.

"JJ." She paused "I'm ok." She said one last time and she walked away out of the class.

Guilt rushed all though his body. He wanted to beat himself up like he did the guy at the party. He didn't know what had gotten into him. He hadn't been himself in weeks. He hated it.

That afternoon Pope, JJ, and John b all went out on the boat.  Pope kept talking about Kie, and how it all went down. John b gave him solid advice but JJ just sat there, guilty. He felt so bad. He kept looking up at John b, making eyes contact and quickly looking down. John b looked at him with shame. He knew that JJ knew how Pope felt. He wondered why he still did it anyways if he didn't even like Kie. Did he have something against Pope? or was he lying abt Kie.

All John b knew, is what he saw that night. His best friends passionately loving on each other. That wasn't the first time he had walked in on JJ with a girl. And this time it looked so different. He looked ashamed and scared and guilty. What was going on.

A noice from his phone makes JJ snap back into reality.

Kie🤙🏻:
Kie: meet me at my house at 12:00 am.
Kie: I need to show you something.
Kie: be Deseret.
(Read 9:23)

JJ read this and smiled. He didn't know what she needed to show him, all he knew is that she was okay with seeing him. That made him feel relief.

12 o clock came around and JJ snuck his way to her back yard. He got pebbles and started to throw them at her window to get her attention. She opens the window, looking down at her goofy headed best friend. She smiled and pointed at a way to get up.

Once he got up there, he slowly crawled through her window. His boots clopping onto her floor.

"Shhhh" she says gesturing at his shoes. "My parents have me on lock down right now. They would kill me if they saw someone up here."

He slowly crept deeper into her room. As she lead him to a box that was on her desk.

It was a box her and JJ had buried when they were kids. It was a promise of there friendship. He smiled big as she opened he nostalgic shoe box. They both laughed at the thought of them doing this as kids. It brought back amazing memories.

He grabbed the box and sat down on her bed. He started looking through it, laughing at everything they had put in it. There were hats and stickers and baseball cards. Those were the things that used to be important to them back then. He laughed at there childishness.

In that moment it had felt like nothing happened between them. It reminded him of when they were just friends, laughing and having a good time. He missed it. But he wanted both. He wanted her, but didn't want the complications of having her. It didn't matter though. She was worth it to him.

Kie soon sat next to him on the bed. She began to point out things that they had written on the side of the box. They both went in to grab something in the box and there hands touched. A spark of electricity shot down each of there bodies. JJ quickly turned his head to find kies eyes.

That touch had reminded them of what they hadn't finished. This time both sober. They sat there looking at each other desperately . He wanted more of her. And she wanted more of him.

As they sat there on her bed, staring into each other's eyes, debating on what would happen next. Her door abruptly opened and kies dad walked in. It was so fast they didn't have time to even process what happened.

They both turned looking at her dad. Terrified, embarrassed, guilty.

JJ shot up from her bed and she followed suit.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING IN- .. KIARA WHAT THE HELL IS HE DOING IN HERE!" Her dad yells, furiously, pointing at JJ. 

"NO DAD, ITS NOT WHAT YOU THINK I PROMISE" Kiara yells, begging him to understand.

JJ stood there, not knowing what to do.

"Sir.. I promise-" he says calmly and defensively

"BOY I DON'T CARE WHAT YOU PROMISE, I KNOW WHERE YOU COME FROM!" Her dad yells, pointing fingers.

JJ was famous for having a shitty father. The way he dressed and carried himself didn't help his case. Every parent in town knew he was nothing but trouble. He was the last guy anyone wanted to find in their daughters bedroom in the middle of the night.

"DAD" Kie yelled, clearly pissed. She knew how that would make JJ feel. She was so mad that her dad crossed that line. "HES JUST MY FRIEND"

These words struck JJ hard. Making him think they really were just friends who got drunk. He hated how that made him feel.

Her dad looked over at her and spots the mark on her neck. It was late, so she had already washed the makeup off.

"WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?" He asked, looking back over to JJ.

"DID YOU GIVE HER THAT!?" he yelled, pointing at her neck

"I-" JJ says, beginning to get defensive, gesturing with his hands Until he's cut off.

"DID YOU DO IT YES OR NO!?" He screamed while walking up to the punk kid standing next to his daughter.

It was a sensitive subject for both of them. He did give it to her. He hated that he did. But he did.

JJ couldn't give him a direct answer. The shame he felt for what he did to her came rushing back in.

"Listen.. sir " he begins to explain. His mind coming up with a lie to get them out of this. But before he can defend himself, he's cut off.

"GET THE HELL OUT OF MY HOUSE" her dad yelled, now pointing toward the door.

JJ looked at Kie with a sorry face, And slowly looked back at her dad, angry in the eye.  He heads to the door. As he walks to the door with his head down he turns to the side to look at Kie. They make eye contact until they were blocked by the door as he left.

"DON'T YOU LOOK AT HER YOU LITTLE PRICK" he yells out as he walks out the door.

"Dad!" Kiara says, beginning to cry "he didn't do anything"

"He didn't do anything?"  He says his voice getting louder again " THEN WHATS THAT ON YOU NECK HUH?"

"DAD IT WASN'T LIKE THAT" she yells

JJ can still hear their arguing through the walls as he slowly walks down the hall.

" OH... OH IT WASN'T LIKE THAT HUH?

" NOO" she says defensively

"THEN WHAT WAS IT LIKE KIARA?"

"DAD"

"NO REALLY, PLEASE TELL ME. WHAT WAS IT LIKE THEN"

Their arguing grew quieter has he got farther away.  He knew he wouldn't be able to see her again for a while. Her dad was so mad.

He ran out of the house, numb. The words they'd said replaying in his head. They weren't just friends. And they both knew it.

The next day JJ went to school hoping to apologize. But she wasn't there. Did her dad really not trust her enough to let her go to school? He zoned out the whole class period, replaying everything in his head. Last night. The party. The hallway. These past few weeks, the tension between them was unbearable.

Two days later Kie finally showed up to class.

"KIE" JJ shouts out of excitement to get her attention. "You're back! are you okay? What happened?" He says frantically, walking over to her. He almost grabbed her hands but quickly stopped himself.

"Heyy JJ" she says, relieved to see him. "Yea I'm fine. My dads got me on lock down big time now. But I'm okay" she smiles. Seeing him so worried made her feel good.

"I'm sorry." He says "I'm so glad you're back"

They go back to their seats. During the whole lesson, Kie kept looking back and they'd smile at each other. JJ was just so happy she was back. He had missed her more than he thought.

The whole rest of the day, things were almost back to normal. JJ was back to being his old goofy self. It was as if they had just forgotten everything that had happened.

The group was back and not fighting anymore. Their moment they had shared in her room had reminded him of what they had. He missed being able to talk to her. Something just switched after that night. Everyone was okay.

All was normal except.. JJ would always find a way to get close with Kie. He would always be walking next to her in the hallways. They sat next to each other at lunch. And he found many excuses to touch her. Rather it'd been tapping her shoulder to get her attention. Or putting her jacket on for her. Or sitting so close there legs touched.

John b was glad no one was fighting again. But he noticed how JJ followed her around like that. They were always together. He also noticed the way JJ looked at her. His eyes sparked anytime she walked in the room. He found it kind of wholesome. He had never seen his best friend act this way.

Everyone else In the group just assumed their fight was over. But they were quick to realize something was off with them. They had never been so attached before.

For the next week they went on like this. Until..

They were walking in the hallway at school.  JJs shoulder touching hers as always. Their hands to their sides as they walked quickly through the halls.

Without warning there hands accidentally touched. Hers cupped into his perfectly. A jolt of electricity shot through their bodies. They pulled their hands away quickly and awkwardly. At that moment. They were reminded of their feelings. Their feelings for each other hadn't gone away. They had just been expressing them In different ways the whole week.

They looked at each other scared. They wanted to ignore it, but they couldn't. They awkwardly walked back to class.

!!!
Let me know if y'all want another part. I didn't too to great on this. I just got Wattpad and jotted this down. Lemme know if y'all want more

{hey! writer from the future here!! I first started writing this three years ago and the story has came so far! I'm going back to all my old chapters and fixing some grammar errors and bad wording as much as I can! I feel like my writing has gotten better over time and I cringe everytime I go back and read old chapters. Hopefully this makes reading it easier!! Enjoy the long ride:)))}