Where are the night owls👀👀

Sorry not Sorry it's a Jawahir's POV 😂😂

Don't come @ me😹🚶🏻‍♀️

Ignore the typos please, typed it real quick.

JAWAHIR

Ramadan; the time to empty your stomach and feed your soul.

Ramadan is a time when one cuts himself off from worldly norms and renews himself to Allah Subuhanahu wa ta'ala-his creator. He disciplines his mind, heart, hand, feet, tongue and stomach to act only in accordance to that which Allah Subuhanahu wa ta'ala loves. In the process, the believers heart is cleansed and washed to its deepest and most innermost part not from earthly water but from the divine rain-the final revelation-The Quran.

Alhamdulillah the moon was sighted and Ramadan begins today. Right now all the females in the house, except Nai'a, are in the kitchen, preparing the meal for suhoor.

Mama is handling the tuwo while Mammie is handling the soup; miyan taushe. Abu prefers having that for suhoor and we have it almost all the time.

"Kawai za'a wa mutane tuwo da assusuban nan." Suhayla grumbled under her breath, she's leaning against the counter top.

Mammie turned around to glare at her. "Will you stop talking nonsense before I descend a slap on your face, go on and make yourself useful." She hissed at the end. Suhayla pouted and started slicing the fruits.

I bit my inner cheek to hide my laughter. Y'all must me wondering why I am at home right?

Well, he who shall not be named isn't back yet. He has been gone for two months and he still hasn't directly spoken to me in anyway. It's through one of his sisters, but astagafurillah I'm doubting if he really asks about my wherebout.

The first week I was very sad and heartbroken, I mean I literally just poured my heart out to him and that's the response I got. The next few weeks I was very angry, how dare he?!

But now, now I'm disappointed. Beyond disappointed, I guessed I expected too much and somehow I'm responsible for my own broken heart. I expected too much, but I've learned my lesson now.

The last time he disappeared like this I was lucky enough to get an e-mail, I guess I'm not worthy of that anymore......

"Jawahir!" A voice broke me out of my reverie. "Huh?"! I looked around confusedly.

"You're always lost these days Jaw, what's wrong?" Mammie asked.

"She's missing her sahib alqalb obviously," Suhayla said with a teasing glint in her eyes.

I rolled my eyes at my sister.

"When is he coming back by the way? He has been gone for long." Mama added with a frown.

I felt a heavy weight settle on my chest. I flashed them a fake wide grin. "Mama he has been very busy. We talked at night, during their suhoor period." I hate you Aayan, for making me lie to my parents, to the people I love the most.

"He found out that one company Baba invested so much in is crumbling, he's trying to either buy it or get his shares out safely. And it's a very long procedure." This part isn't a lie though, at least from what Maheera said.

"I pray he comes back after all this is your first Ramadan together as a couple."

I know that Mama, I know.

We finished cooking and called everyone down. It was especially hard for me to wake Suhayl up, wallah he sleeps like a log. One minute I'll wake him up the other he's already fast asleep again. Mammie said I should let him be, kada Allah sa ya tashi.

Right now he's stuffing his face with anything as fast as he could as he has just three minutes left. I couldn't control my laughter and laughed out loud. Suhayl raised his head to glare at me.

"Cigaba da hararra ta a kira sallah; continue glaring at her till the prayer is called." Mama remarked.

Suhayl realized he's wasting time and continued pushing what he could. I secretly used my phone to take a Snapchat video of him, oh lord let's pray he doesn't see this.

Allahu Akbar.....came the adhan.

"Time up Suhayl." Suhayla giggled pulling the plate away from him. He quickly gobbled down a glass of water to wash down the food.

We all performed our wudu and Abu led the prayer.

Everyone remained seated after saying the salam, Abu turned around to face all of us. It's kind of a tradition for Abu to give a sermon after every salatul subhi during Ramadan.

After that each and every person went back to his room.

*****

"Sadaqallahul azeem," I whispered to myself. I carefully closed the holy book and kept it on my side drawer.

I desperately want to complete the whole Quran this Ramadan, it's something I've never done and I am ashamed of myself, if possible I want to complete it twice or more than.

Abu gave me a hint on how to complete the Quran this morning. He said "The Quran has approximately 600 pages, if you divide it on 30 days that's 20 pages a day. It seems difficult right?" He asked with a smile, I hesitantly nodded.

"But if you divide it on 5 prayers a day it gets easier. If you read four pages after every salah in Ramadan, then you've completed the Quran. If you want to complete the Quran twice you read four pages before and after every salah. With that in sha Allah you can do it."

I didn't know when I threw my arms around him. "Jazakallahu khairan Abu, thank you." My voice started cracking. I haven't been in the long warm embrace of my father for a long time and it's making me emotional, it's making me want to spill everything thing out and say Abu I'm not okay.

But that's just a wishful thought.

I took a short shower before going downstairs. As I was walking down the stairs thoughts of Aayan kept going through my head.

I had so many things planned for this Ramadan, even if I've never said it out loud. I wanted to complete the Quran with my husband, he's a hafiz after all I know that wouldn't be hard for him.

How he'll be the one to wake me up for suhoor or vice versa. Then after subhi prayer we'll sit down and reside together, as I lay my head on his chest or lap while he's reciting soothingly.

We'll prepare iftar together and.........

Oh stop it Jawahir!! You're just torturing yourself. The man doesn't care about you. It was all just a mere pretense.

"Ya Jawjaw!!" A voice gasped successfully breaking my train of thoughts. "Why are you crying?!" Affan shrieked.

I didn't even realize I was crying, I hastily wiped my face with my palms. "It's nothing, I'm okay."

"It's not nothing Ya Jawjaw, please tell me why you were crying?"

"Affan it's like tha—

"—are you hungry? An hana ki cin abinci ko?"

I didn't know when I laughed out so loud. Ya Rabbi, Affan won't kill me. I wrapped my arms around him. "It's not like that baby bro," I smiled. "Come let me give you a cupcake." I said to divert his attention. Kids are too smart nowadays.

We went to the kitchen to get Affan his cupcake, I ended up giving a cookie—not homemade though— because they finished the one I made.

"Ya Jawahir, psst Ya Jawahir," Affan whisper-yelled. Why is he whispering? I bend down to his level, he motioned for me to bring my ear closer. I eyed him weirdly but still did.

"You should also eat the cookies, I promise I won't tell anyone. You see if you eat, you won't feel hungry again then you won't cry."

I chuckled at his innocence, I knelt down properly and pulled his cheeks. "Thank you Affan, I'll don't worry." I kissed his cheeks and he ran out.

I washed my hands and got to work. Today I'm just going to take the food to mosques around the area, as I go on we'll proceed further.

Two of the house maids came to help me. I plan on making bean cakes, fried yam and potatoes, pap and maybe fruit salad, if we're not able to make the salad we'll just slice it. I'll definitely bake something, maybe bread for suhoor, not sure yet.

I already did my around twelve now we'll just dive right into the work.

Phew! We managed to finish everything few minutes to maghrib, Mammie and Mama later lend me a helping hand even though I refused. Suhayla, well she has been sleeping since, raguwa.

I quickly freshened up before taking the food myself along with the maids that helped me.

As I was about to go out of the car I remember what Abu once told me. "If you give charity openly, it's good, but if you keep it a secret and give it to the needy in private that is better for you, and it will atone for some of your bad deeds; God is well aware of what you do (Quran 2:271)"

And I suddenly didn't want to do it in the open. Forget about anything in this world, I'm striving for my akhira. I kept the flyers I made, I just realized how selfish it was of me to think about it at a time like this. Astagafurillah, ya Rabbi forgive me.

I used my veil to cover my face like a niqab. We took the food flasks to a store-room like place outside of the mosque. I served the food myself.

Subuhanallah, the smiles on their faces. The prayers they were saying for me, for us, it was Masha Allah. A certain serene and tranquil feeling washed over me, the feeling was so satisfying.

Alhamdulillah, ya Rabbi continue to bless and guide us.

I went back home my heart feeling very light, I joined my family for iftar.

"How was it Jaw habibty?" Abu inquired with a smile.

I grinned widely. "It was splendid Abu, so splendid."

He nodded. "I'm glad to hear that, Allah maki albarka, this is a great example you're setting for others. It makes me proud as a father, I wish you all the best in whatever you do. May Allah guide you, we are here praying for you also."

"Ameen Abu, Ameen." I said tearfully.

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Yours truly
Memzyb✨🌹

I'll advise you to keep scrolling though 😁🌝🌚

AAYAN

Yesso💃🏻💃🏻 you read it right😁😁
What we've all been waiting for🥳🥳
My tweeny Ayeesherh_bukar said "your book will get boring if you don't do an Aayan's POV" or is it a Aayan's POV 🤷🏻‍♀️😂😂 oho Idk
So here it is.

It won't answer all your questions though🙊
But I promise it'll give a hindsight of what's going on.....that's if you're able to guess it😏😏

****

Numb. That's the only thing that comes close to what I've been feeling for the past weeks.

Y'all must hate me right now, I get it. I hate myself too, so much. But I did what I thought was right at that time. The only thing I regret is the approach I used, if I'm given a chance to handle it differently I will in a heartbeat. Sadly it's all a wishful thought, the damage has been done. It's something I'll regret for the rest of my life.

I knew how fragile she was......

But in a haste to save her I did more damage than good. I don't want a repeat of last time, by Allah I won't be able to handle it wallahi I cannot. It'll destroy me completely, I don't think I'll be able to recover.

I slowly dragged my legs to the bathroom to perform wudhu as I heard the adhan for maghrib. One down, twenty eight more to go.

I'll give everything, everything to spend this holy month with my wife, my family. Our first Ramadan together.....

But things aren't calm yet, nothing is okay. I cannot afford to make a mistake, the last it happened. It cost me gravely.

I can't risk her safety....

I prayed at home, there isn't any mosque close by.

I walked down the street to a restaurant to get food for iftar. I ordered a simple light meal.

The food tastes bland, like I was eating sand. I've been eating for the sake of it not because I enjoy it, I miss my homemade food.

I sat down in the living room after returning from the restaurant. I picked up my phone, the phone we bought together. I scrolled through my pictures, my heart breaking even more in the process.

This is no ones fault but yours, deal with it.

True....

Jawahir I'm so sorry. I lo—

Screams.

I didn't know when sleep overtook me.

Screams!

That's all I could hear the moment I close my eyes. Heart wrenching, agonizing screams....

I closed my eyes once again but this time I saw my Tesoro instead, I quickly sat up, repeatedly saying Inna lillahi wa inna ilahi rajiun.

Ya Arahman, ya Rabbil Alamin save my wife. Protect her from all evils, she's my everything.

Sleep is completely out of the question, I got down from the bed and limped to the bathroom. I can't recognize myself anymore whilst looking at the mirror. Dark circles are stuck to my face like a second skin, bones are clearly visible everywhere.

What have I become?!

The ringing of the intercom brought me out my reverie, I quickly splashed my face with water before walking out.

"Hello?"

"Hello Mr Abbas?"

"Yes?"

The phone slipped from my hand and crashed to the floor.

"WHAT?!"

🙊🙊🙊

Toh fah!

Ghen ghen!!!!

Did I confuse you more?😂
If yes, then yay💃🏻💃🏻 that was the aim.

Anyhow🎤🎤 at least we know that there's a reason Aayan did what he did🤷🏻‍♀️🤷🏻‍♀️

Ramadan is approaching💃🏻 Allah ya kaimu da rai da lafiya 🤲🏼🤲🏼

I don't think they'll be updates during Ramadan, no they won't be. We all should keep wattpad aside during that holy period please🙏🏼❤️

Don't worry I'll (in sha Allah) update once or twice before Ramadan. No promises though. Don't hate me 😪😭💔

I'll stop talking now🤐🤐
I miss y'all🤗❤️

Don't forget to;
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Yours truly
Memzyb✨🌹