The new friends that I received in the new class were good but maybe, I was too blind to believe in every smile I found on faces before me.

I was a person who needed people to be around her all the time. Not because they were of any use to me, or treated me like a princess, or we were kind of best friends. No, there was nothing like that. But I was addicted to the idea of having them around me and believing that they were my strength.

How can I make you understand the condition of my mind?

I loved being alone, observing little things. But when surrounded by people, I needed someone to stay by my side — that's how vulnerable I used to be. Every shoulder by my side made me rely on it as soon as I saw it. Maybe the hunger to be loved and understood by people was so strong that I was ready to lean on someone as soon as I got the chance. 

The Bible tells us to be like a warrior and the Lord even trains us into living fearlessly, [And the angel of the Lord appeared unto him, and said unto him, The Lord is with thee, thou mighty man of valor. — Judges 6:12, KJV]. Haven't you read in the Bible how David mentioned that God had trained him well for wars? [Blessed be the Lord my strength which teacheth my hands to war, and my fingers to fight. — Psalms 144:1, KJV]. The same way God teaches us, and I feel blessed to have someone like God who even makes us fearless. 

When God comes to train this way, I know it hurts. In old times, you know kings used to practice a lot before meeting each other in a battleground. Can you imagine the way they used to practice? We know how brilliant David was in fighting. Women used to sing praises of him, [Saul has killed thousands but David has killed tens of thousands! — 1 Samuel 18:7, NIV]. Ever wondered what took killing ‘tens of thousands’? Of course, a great amount of sacrifice, discipline, blood and tears! 

Before killing tens of thousands, David had to face a lion and a bear to protect the flock under his care, [1 Samuel 17:36]. He killed such dangerous beasts and there was nobody to praise him for that. That kind of sacrifice and discipline are needed to become as fearless as David.

I agree that the phase where God trains us is painful and lazy people will never like this idea. However, if you're lazy and still have this desire to let God guide you, it's awesome! Just ask God and He'll help you in making a firm decision.

When that season comes and God is training you, let Him just do it! Don't stop Him. Becoming fearless is an amazing experience. I enjoyed being in my comfort zone and I didn't want anyone to disturb me but when God came and decided to shake me whole to wake me up, I learned it's the best if we let God take the lead and silently obey Him in everything.

How many of us are afraid of sickness that might kill us when we grow old? How many of us think we'll become completely bald as soon as we cross 60? 60, I think I grabbed a big number because people around 30 are already afraid of becoming bald. How tiny of you to be afraid of such tiny reasons!

Beat your plowshares into swords, and your pruning hooks into spears: let the weak day, I'm strong! — Joel 3:10, NIV.

People have a Goliath in their lives and they need to beat him off but before meeting the giant in the battlefield, God will train you in darkness and hidden places where you'll receive no praises from anyone but it will only make you strong enough to come face to face with the Goliath of your life and defeat it. That's why I say, let God work in your life.

Seeing huge problems, many of us begin cursing God. Some stop talking to God. Some stop serving Him, thinking they became Christians to receive luxury but they were being persecuted! Dear, here I'll say, Indeed, all who desire to live a godly life in Christ Jesus will be persecuted. — 2 Timothy 3:12, NIV. 

Never curse God. What is happening in your life is earned by your deeds. God had no role to play in it. God gave you the right to live, you lived your way and when troubles came, they came by the result of your living. God never sends troubles in life. He may allow them and He has reasons for it but God is good and He doesn't have to trouble you. Rather, we should be grateful to God that in every trouble, He promises to stay by our side! [God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. — Psalms 44:1, NIV]. 

I praise God for being available in such an amazing way that He even trains His people for battles. We know there are countless battles in the spiritual realm, [For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. — Eph. 6:12, NIV], and God even makes us strong enough to stand before those principalities! 

But that wasn't it when I was away from God. 

When I didn't know Jesus, I lived this way. I wanted my friends to be around me. They didn't help me in any special way but I was addicted. I was crazy about having them around me. The day they all were absent in the class, I felt betrayed! I was so pathetic that I lived and thought that way. 

Trust me, living in fear and constant anxiety is killing. I don't think I need to make you feel so. You already know how horrible it is to live in horror.

So, I lived this way and I didn't change for years. I didn't change until I graduated.

But then, there was a turning point in my life when my friend introduced me to a teaching center where the guy was a Christian.

Now, I tell you, before this, I used to hate Jesus.

I hated Christianity and I hated Christians. I used to think they brainwash people into abandoning their religion and becoming a Christian. Almost every Indian has this mentality, by the way. Lovely Indian, please change the way you think if you also think so. I used to think these people were annoying. Just stay away from them. But how wrong I was!

At that time, I realized I was also weak at math so I needed those classes. I didn't like math at all! I was just planning to change the subject once I graduated secondary school.

So, this guy used to teach at home. He was calm and his nature was good. I didn't feel embarrassed or scared around him like I used to feel around other guys. I wondered what was so lovely about his nature and when I learned that he followed Jesus, I was annoyed to the core, trust me!

He used to talk about Jesus while teaching and I was pissed off. I was like, “Please, that's enough!” 

Though he never talked to me about Jesus but… come on, I was there and I was listening to him tell other students about Jesus! 

In his stories, he was troubled many times and Jesus saved him. Jesus talked to him. I was like, “How's it possible?” He said he had a relationship with Jesus and I literally rolled my eyes, muttering, “Oh, please!”

Of course, I had this all in my mind. I never said a word to him. I minded my own business and just wanted to do better in math. I already planned to leave the classes once I was done but before it could happen, he approached me.

I personally admired his gentle nature so I didn't have any problem when he texted me for the first time. I knew he had no wrong intentions. Somewhere I was aware of his agenda and I texted him back. We got into a conversation. He asked me some questions and I could see where the conversation was going and I was determined not to fall into the trap. 

I already said that I made it clear in the broad daylight that I'd never believe in Jesus!

But as he began sharing about Jesus, I couldn't help but know more about Him. Surprisingly, I liked the topic. He presented Jesus to me in a different way and it was all true about Jesus. 

Why and how was he able to talk about Jesus differently? Because he had a relationship with Him. He knew Him personally.

All that he texted me, I knew it was true. I vowed not to believe in anything said by Christians about Jesus but I did that when I was blind. However, as he shared the Gospel with me, my eyes opened. 

He shared the Gospel with me and I learned that Jesus is the Son of God. He is God, and another revelation I received right at that moment was that there's no God but Jesus. 

Yes.

I needed to make this thing clear in this chapter to my readers. So, listen carefully. 

Not only Indians but there are some people throughout the world that think Jesus is also a God. They think there are other gods and Jesus can be one of them. No way! 

This mentality leads to backside people and they go back to idolatry. But let me tell you, salvation is in Jesus' name. Only in His Name, [Neither is there salvation in any other: for there is none other name under heaven given among men, whereby we must be saved. — Acts 4:12].

There is no God but Jesus. He is the King of kings, the Lord of lords. There's no one like Him. None can compare to Him. He is the only One. 

“This is what the Lord says— Israel’s King and Redeemer, the Lord Almighty: I am the first and I am the last; apart from me there is no God. Who then is like me? Let him proclaim it. Let him declare and lay out before me what has happened since I established my ancient people, and what is yet to come— yes, let them foretell what will come. Do not tremble, do not be afraid. Did I not proclaim this and foretell it long ago? You are my witnesses. Is there any God besides me? No, there is no other Rock; I know not one.” All who make idols are nothing, and the things they treasure are worthless. Those who would speak up for them are blind; they are ignorant, to their own shame. Who shapes a god and casts an idol, which can profit nothing? People who do that will be put to shame; such craftsmen are only human beings. Let them all come together and take their stand; they will be brought down to terror and shame. The blacksmith takes a tool and works with it in the coals; he shapes an idol with hammers, he forges it with the might of his arm. He gets hungry and loses his strength; he drinks no water and grows faint. The carpenter measures with a line and makes an outline with a marker; he roughs it out with chisels and marks it with compasses. He shapes it in human form, human form in all its glory, that it may dwell in a shrine. He cut down cedars, or perhaps took a cypress or oak. He let it grow among the trees of the forest, or planted a pine, and the rain made it grow. It is used as fuel for burning; some of it he takes and warms himself, he kindles a fire and bakes bread. But he also fashions a god and worships it; he makes an idol and bows down to it. Half of the wood he burns in the fire; over it he prepares his meal, he roasts his meat and eats his fill. He also warms himself and says, “Ah! I am warm; I see the fire.” From the rest he makes a god, his idol; he bows down to it and worships. He prays to it and says, “Save me! You are my god!” They know nothing, they understand nothing; their eyes are plastered over so they cannot see, and their minds closed so they cannot understand. No one stops to think, no one has the knowledge or understanding to say, “Half of it I used for fuel; I even baked bread over its coals, I roasted meat and I ate. Shall I make a detestable thing from what is left? Shall I bow down to a block of wood?” Such a person feeds on ashes; a deluded heart misleads him; he cannot save himself, or say, “Is not this thing in my right hand a lie?”

Isaiah 44:6‭-‬20, NIV.

I am the Lord, and there is no other; apart from me there is no God. I will strengthen you, though you have not acknowledged me, so that from the rising of the sun to the place of its setting people may know there is none besides me. I am the Lord, and there is no other. I form the light and create darkness, I bring prosperity and create disaster; I, the Lord, do all these things. “You heavens above, rain down my righteousness; let the clouds shower it down. Let the earth open wide, let salvation spring up, let righteousness flourish with it; I, the Lord, have created it.

Isaiah 45:5‭-‬8, NIV. 

“This is what the Lord says— the Holy One of Israel, and its Maker: Concerning things to come, do you question me about my children, or give me orders about the work of my hands? It is I who made the earth and created mankind on it. My own hands stretched out the heavens; I marshaled their starry hosts.

Isaiah 45:11‭-‬12, NIV.

Truly you are a God who has been hiding himself, the God and Savior of Israel. All the makers of idols will be put to shame and disgraced; they will go off into disgrace together. But Israel will be saved by the Lord with an everlasting salvation; you will never be put to shame or disgraced, to ages everlasting.

Isaiah 45:15‭-‬17, NIV.

For this is what the Lord says— he who created the heavens, he is God; he who fashioned and made the earth, he founded it; he did not create it to be empty, but formed it to be inhabited— he says: “I am the Lord, and there is no other. I have not spoken in secret, from somewhere in a land of darkness; I have not said to Jacob’s descendants, ‘Seek me in vain.’ I, the Lord, speak the truth; I declare what is right. 

Isaiah 45:18‭-‬19, NIV.

Declare what is to be, present it— let them take counsel together. Who foretold this long ago, who declared it from the distant past? Was it not I, the Lord? And there is no God apart from me, a righteous God and a Savior; there is none but me.

Isaiah 45:21, NIV. 

“Turn to me and be saved, all you ends of the earth; for I am God, and there is no other. By myself I have sworn, my mouth has uttered in all integrity a word that will not be revoked: Before me every knee will bow; by me every tongue will swear. They will say of me, ‘In the Lord alone are deliverance and strength.’” All who have raged against him will come to him and be put to shame.

Isaiah 45:22‭-‬24, NIV.

Personally when I read these chapters where the Lord reveals Himself to prophet Isaiah, I feel tremors running down my spine. I love the authority the Lord Most High holds and it makes me boast that the Lord I serve is the Creator of heavens, the earth and everything that is in them.

If you want this revelation personally from God, you can ask Him. He will engrave the truth deep into your being and you will know crystal clear that there's only one God and He is Jesus. A lot of people I know used to believe in Jesus. They believed what they heard — the Gospel. But as time passed, they were back to idol worship.

Now that I'm in faith, I used to wonder what made them so blind that they could leave Jesus. I ask this question because I got addicted to Him, so when I see people going back to their own lifestyle, I pity them. They missed it. However, I know the answer now. It wasn't just clear in their heads that Jesus is the Lord and there's no one besides Him. Other gods don't exist, it's a trap of the devil to keep people away from God. 

If you're one of them, I tell you, dear, change this mentality and ask God to forgive you. He is rich in mercy and slow to anger, He will forgive you in a moment if you're truly guilty of it. Stop thinking that other gods exist. They don't. They are demons.

In India, a lot of people share the same mentality. Though now many have risen to hate Christians and persecute them in the worst possible way. But we need to come out of it. Enough is enough. We need to understand we were created by that one God and His beautiful name is Jesus.