"I'm in love with you."

Those words escaped my lips before I could even think about what to say. The dark room that surrounds us somehow became darker and quieter as seconds pass by without you responding.

I let my teeth sink into my bottom lip as I turned my head to find you staring at me, slack-jawed. The dim lights could barely illuminate your face, but I can tell you were caught off-guard. I suddenly felt guilty for being the cause of that for some reason, but I instantly recovered my confidence.

I've already said it, anyway, so might as well barrel on.

"I'm sorry. That was random," I quickly apologized, sitting up and leaning my back against the headboard. "But it's true. I am in love with you, and I don't know if you feel the same way but I just wanted to be honest with you 'cause you're somehow my friend now and friends are honest with each other —"

"Perrie, breathe," you finally said, cutting me off as you sat up straight against the headboard as well, facing me.

I didn't have the guts to look you in the eyes so I looked straight ahead on the black screen of the television situated in front of us. But no matter how hard I try to ignore your intense gaze, I just simply can't.

"Yeah . . . ," you finally replied, and I felt your supple fingers intertwine with my own. "That was random, Perrie. And at two in the morning right after we —"

"Yeah, I know, sorry."

"Weren't you the one who made the rule about not having feelings for each other or something?"

I grunted, "Ironic, isn't it?"

I heard you chuckle and squeeze my hand gently, and I felt comforted for a moment because at least one of us is trying to lighten things up.

"Very ironic." You paused for a few seconds, and when I felt that I needed to fill in the gaps of silence in our conversation, you finally spoke up, "Since when?"

Since when?

It wasn't until you said those words that I finally realized that that was the question I dreaded the most.

Because I don't know since when exactly, Jade.

Since the day you decided to sleep over for the first time when you always leave immediately afterwards? Since the day you left your suitcase full of pajamas in my closet because you figured we'd see each other more anyway? Since the day you decided to spend the next morning with me?

Since the day you acted like you're my girlfriend?

There were too many potential answers to that specific question, but I opted for the safest one.

"I don't know." I shrugged, acting nonchalant about this whole thing.

But little do you know, Jade, that in my head, the whole world is upside down and I feel sick to the stomach for some unknown reason. In my head, I'm conjuring up some scenarios wherein you rejected me, and I'll be one of those sappy lovelorn girls that cry their eyeballs out every single day.

Your next words surprised me, though.

"Maybe I should take you out on a date."

I whipped my head and peered at your chocolate brown eyes for the first time. Did I hear that correctly? Did you honestly say that? Those questions were answered by your expectant, hopeful gaze.

"Wh-what?" I stammered a bit, confused and shocked at the same time because this time, I was the one caught off-guard.

You sat up straighter, looking more determined than I've ever seen, looking more beautiful than I've ever seen, looking more you than I've ever seen. You reached out to my other hand, pulling me closer to you until our faces are practically inches away. My breath hitched at the unexpected action.

And then you whispered underneath your breath, "Let me take you out on a date."

I didn't know what to say. "Uhm —"

My eyes widened when you pressed your lips against mine. The kiss was fleeting, but it was effective because it rendered me speechless even when you pulled away quickly.

"Okay, hear me out, Pez," you said, clearing your throat afterwards as if for dramatic effect. And when I showed you that I'm listening attentively, you chewed on your bottom lip and started to explain, "Look, I'd be lying if I say that I feel the exact same way, but I know you make me feel something. Maybe not as . . . deep as to what you're feeling, but it's there. You get me?"

Feeling overwhelmed that I couldn't muster up some words to trot out a reply, I resorted to nodding instead.

You sighed, "Pez, I'm not one of those douchebags that, just by hearing the phrase 'falling in love', would suddenly up and leave, okay? I may not feel the same way right now but maybe in the near future, I could fall in love with you, too."

As if hit by epiphany, I blinked a bunch of times and held up a hand. "Wait, are you saying you're gonna give us a shot?"

You paused, then, "Yeah."

"But you don't feel the same way, though."

"If you can fall in love with me, why can't I do the same?"

For some reason, I felt indignant hearing that. I scoffed and raised an incredulous brow. "You say that as if falling in love is a choice. It's not like I chose to fall for you . . ."

At that point, you moved to turn on the lamp ensconced on the bedside table. I rubbed my eyes to adjust to the brightness of our room, but when I looked back at you, I suddenly wished you didn't have to turn the lamp on.

The hurt that flashed across your facial features made my stomach drop simply because I'm the reason behind it.

"So you don't wanna give us a shot?"

I vigorously shook my head. "Hey, I didn't say that."

"What's your point, exactly?" You sounded frustrated. "Do you want to give us a shot or not?"

"What makes you so sure you'll fall for me?" I retorted, hating the way I sounded like you have this hold on me that I can't dislodge myself from.

"Because," you murmured, closing your eyes and inhaling sharply before continuing, "you're different, Perrie. I want to give us a shot because I know I could fall for you. You're already making me feel things so might as well explore them."

When you finally opened your eyes, my heart suddenly started doing some weird acrobatic stunts the moment I peered into them, because it felt like seeing a whole different person for the first time.

Your usual chocolate brown eyes that used to be filled with lust to the brim somehow carried so much gentleness within them. Your smile was as soft as the mattress we're both sitting on right now, and my heart went from doing cartwheels to suddenly thawing at the sight.

I heaved a sigh and removed my hands from your grip. "Jade, I need to be sure you're not playing with me here."

"I promise you I'm not," you spoke adamantly, your smile quickly vanishing. You reached for my hands again — desperately this time, almost as if I was your lifeline. "Perrie, give me a chance. I don't know what I'm feeling right now, but I can assure you that I'm only feeling this whenever I'm with you. And I know I'll regret it if I let you go without knowing if we can work."

"And what if in the end, you don't feel the same way?" I challenged your stare with my hardened gaze.

You didn't reply at first, looking stunned at the question. I needed to let you know that I'm not one to be messed with and that if you're just playing with me here, I won't dither to walk out the door.

You looked over my shoulder, and I can only assume that you're wracking your brain for words appropriate enough to say out loud. I can see several emotions flicker within your brown eyes — too many to distinguish which is more accurate to what you're currently feeling.

And then your eyes locked to mine, and you're looking at me like I'm the owner of something special to you; and I'm falling in love all over again because you're too goddamn beautiful.

"Then," you finally talked, taking a deep breath before continuing, "Then, you leave."

I rolled my eyes. I hate how you're right. "Yeah, I figured."

"And we won't ever see each other again."

"Figured."

"And you'll be crying your eyeballs out because I couldn't reciprocate your feelings."

I shrugged. "Figured."

"And I'll be living the rest of my life guilty because of it."

I bunched my lips to the side and hummed, sounding unconvinced. "Not sure about that part. I feel like you'll move on to another girl."

"And you'll move on to someone who can finally love you back," you said as you simply shrug, your bitter smile tugging the strings of my heart painfully. "And then, we'll forget about each other."

"I don't think I'll forget you," I whispered, squeezing your hands and smiling when you squeezed mine back.

"Same. But," you tilted your head adorably, your bitter smile now a teasing one. "Don't forget, that is if I can never feel the same way. Anything can happen, anything's possible. Maybe I'm falling for you right at this moment without realizing it, you know."

I frowned deeply. "Now, you're just giving me false hope here."

"Or maybe I'm telling the truth . . ." Your eyes stared right into mine, and it held so much sincerity that I feel like you are. "Maybe I just realized it now — that I'm falling for you. Maybe I'm already in love with you."

I raised an eyebrow. "Keyword: maybe."

You chuckled and nodded. "Maybe. But we won't know any of that if you don't agree to go on a date with me this Saturday night."