Authors note - since my other stuff doesn't get many views anymore, I think I might as well write something with a stupidly long name which people will (hopefully) read for no particular reason so my other stuff gets votes =D

Anyway... enjoy?

Peace out

-It's hard to be a teenager... being a freak of nature doesn't help-

One

I was thirteen when it happened for the first time.

A completely normal, un-inspiring, average-in-every-way thirteen year old girl. I was popular, but not at the top of the social ladder, clever, but I rarely got A's, pretty enough but not stunning, cute I guess. But average. Looking back, I guess I pine for my normality.

'-is so hot' Callie, my best friend at the time was saying... I was only half listening as I gazed vaguely around the school, I hadn't been sleeping well. I still didn't. The group of friends standing around, it's been too long for me to remember who they were, just blank faces, all agreed.

'Ohmigod!' said Callie her voice so excited and nervous 'here he comes.'

She sounded close to fainting, I turned to see where she was looking and found myself feeling exactly the same, like I said I was average, the hottest guy I had ever seen used to be the most exciting thing in the world. Across the grounds, Ethan Jones was walking; alone. I was surprised, he was usually surrounded by jockish friends, or followed by girls flicking their hair and shaking their butts showing out of mini-skirts. Either way, never alone. He was your typical, all American boy, blonde haired, blue eyed football player with perfectly defined features that didn't seem fair by comparison to others. So of course everyone was in love with him, even me.

'Why's he alone?' I murmured.

'I dunno, maybe he escaped from that hoebag, Lily' said someone who I don't remember anymore. We laughed.

'He's looking over here' I said, as he turned his head, his perfectly tamed, immaculate hair blew slightly in the wind making my heart do a little flip. We had only spoken twice, when he was asking me for a pencil sharpener but I thought I was in love with him... completely convinced. But that was before I had known true love.

'He's looking at you Lena' hissed Callie, jumping down from her spot on the wall. I suddenly realized his blue eyes, with that gorgeous twinkle in the corner were looking straight back into mine with fierce intensity. He smiled at me, and I found myself blushing but returned his stare steadily... then his expression changed. He looked scared, terrified, rooted to the spot. I don't know what he saw, and I don't want to know... it doesn't matter. What happened next was what mattered.

A crack.

It cut through the air, slicing the sudden eery silence. I looked away, but caught something falling out of the corner of my eye. There was a huge, terrifying sound as it fell to the ground, and the sound of wood splintering and glass crashing filled the air.

Then it ended.

Silence.

Then the world descended into chaos.

'Oh My God' screamed Callie, and began to run towards it. Suddenly everyone was talking, yelling, screaming and the horror of the moment became apparent.

'Someone call the ambulance' I heard above the uproar.

I looked back at the havoc, feeling tears of horror come to my eyes because something inside me was telling me that it was the end. Everything I knew was over, obliterated.

Somehow, this was my fault.

'Is he dead?'

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>-<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<

No.

He wasn't dead. He didn't die.

But he might as well of.

The darkness surrounded me, a thick blanket of safety. I couldn't understand why people were afraid of the dark, sure you couldn't see what was out there... but no one could see you either. To me, that was good.

I couldn't understand why I was shaking though.

On the fifth of May, 2006 a tree fell on fourteen year old, athlete prodigy Ethan Ray Jones was struck down by a falling branch. His body was crushed, the doctors rushed him to hospital where he was put on life support. Still, his spine was crushed and he lost the use of his legs and his right arm. He had aspirations of being a football star and they were ruined.

Don't think about it Alina, don't let yourself go there again.

Like you always do.

It couldn't have been me though, of course it couldn't. I couldn't make a tree fall onto someone.

But everyone said it wasn't possible. It had been May, so rot or weather weren't possible, the tree itself had actually been checked just weeks before because of its place, hanging over the school grounds and it was supposed to be completely safe. There hadn't been a mini earthquake, there hadn't been anything... it defied nature but yet it had still happened.

He came back to school a few months later, completely different. He was confined to a wheelchair and his eyes had lost that sparkle... they looked permanently horrified. He was only at school for a week before his family moved, the stress of it all. I avoided him, I couldn't help myself, everyone did it and it was all anyone could talk about, it must have been hell. But on the last day, he saw me. I was standing across the grounds, and I felt his eyes on me, I glanced back momentarily and saw his eyes weren't dull and dead anymore. They were wide with terror, and I saw his lips move. I couldn't have heard what he said, he was too far away, he was too far away for me to read his lips as well, but I knew the word... somehow.

Demon.

And from that point on, everything ended. He moved away, a year ago he apparently committed suicide. I still didn't know what had happened, and the guilt drove me crazy.

I rolled over onto my stomach, I wasn't normal anymore. All those things... no they couldn't be normal, they couldn't be coincidence...

Stop thinking Alina, blank your mind.

I stared at the dark wall, knowing I wouldn't sleep now. It was impossible. I never slept anyway.

The sound of a car starting up began outside, and I heard it pull out of the drive. That was mum and dad, leaving for the third time this week. Dad had some court case so they were having a long weekend in New York, they'd given up trying to convince me to go, trying to convince me to be normal. They'd given up trying altogether.

I must have lain there for another hour, and the pale gray light of dawn crept through my blind. I didn't sleep, but I rose as soon as light spilled into my room, typical teenager room I won't bore you with the details because it was only filled with things that meant nothing to me. The shower was boiling hot, hammering hard onto my bare, white skin. Once the water ran cold I turned it off and stepped out onto the cold tiles, I wrapped one of our fluffy white towels that I knew cost fifty dollars around myself and scraped my long, black hair into a ponytail before wandering back into my room. I changed into a pair of skinny jeans and a long, off one shoulder top, ten looked at my reflection in the mirror. I was skinny, too skinny I looked anorexic but I ate, most of the time.

I had almost disturbingly intense hazel eyes surrounded by long, dark lashes, and ashen skin that set huge contrast to my hair and made my eyes more profound. Long ago, mum used to call me her 'little angel' but even then I knew I was no angel.

Then a white flash interrupted my reflection, and I staggered backwards, slamming my back against the wall and temporarily winding me. My mind was agony; I tried to shut it off, biting my lip at the familiar pain.

-Help me please help me-

I staggered to my bed, collapsing onto its softness and trying to figure out the jumble of confusing images and words.

Fire.

Screaming.

Pain.

Sadness.

Darkness.

Fear.

Loss.

-Someone PLEASE help, she's dead I think she's dead-

Go away, go away.

The emotions she was feeling seemed to flow into me and I found tears pouring down my face, I drew blood from my lip and cheek again; the pain of that as my own. Trying to block out HERS.

-It hurts so much, make it end. Please... I wish-

Then it ended and I lay there, my breathing labored and my entire body shaking. It usually didn't hurt, not like that... did that mean it was getting worse?

I shuddered, and stared at the ceiling until all the feeling had left my body and I felt like me again.