How you gave up
[warning,
this chapter might contain sensitive topics and scenes that might not be suitable for all]
____________
"I'm sorry..."
[Outside the bathroom]
The others had forged now too.
"Y/N! Open the door, come on!"
The leader, Namjoon roars when hammering on the door with his gradually turning red-tinted fists. Jimin stands next to him, trying to ease himself by rubbing his sweaty palms over his face.
Jungkook starts sniveling and Taehyung strolls over to offer him solace.
"Please... don't end up doing something stupid..."
Mumbles young Kook. Yoongi catching that grits his teeth, his knuckle impacting the wall with great force.
"OPEN THE DOOR, GODDAMMIT!"
He too then hides away his face into sweaty palms and shrinks his figure down to his knees.
Hoseok kneels and rubs his back.
"Let me..."
Jin insists in a calm tone, lightly nudging Namjoon who nods, giving him space.
"Y/n... please...
open the door.
let's talk.
everything will be okay."
He goes silent when the mourning from inside comes to a halt.
Everything goes inaudible.
Almost too inaudible...
and Jimin doesn't like that.
"Y/n...?"
He speaks again, looking for any response.
But only meets discount.
Somehow tranquil.
Though, Jimin immediately has a pit in his stomach.
"Step aside."
He urges, but the members only gawk at him.
"I SAID STEP ASIDE."
Namjoon and Jin do what they're told to do, staggered at the sudden outbreak but they couldn't think much about it.
[Jimin P.O.V]
2 years.
Just 2 years since I had met that girl but it was enough for her to grasp my unbeating heart and pointless breath away.
Her thoughts, Her sayings, Her opinions... They were a carbon copy of me. The me I was afraid to bring out.
She understood.
She cared.
She hid her pain to please others.
She... was the one. She was the someone I couldn't afford to lose.
I stumbled back, not giving one about getting hurt by what I was planning to do.
And with all my strength, I ragged back at the door, using my shoulder in an attempt to break it down.
Again taking steps back just to run back into it.
Every time I glimpsed at it, My insides prepared me for what I might face ahead. But it would for sure be better than losing her.
Flashbacks were playing in front of me like a vivid film, my sight being a tape recorder in the time the memory was pictured in my head.
The moment I broke down and her embrace comforted me the entire night,
The moment she screamed at my seniors for giving me lesser stage time,
The moment she glanced up at me with a smile after bandaging the feet I hurt during dance practice.
Every time she stood up for me.
Every time she cheered me on.
Every time she told me it was okay not to be okay.
I had fallen for her. Head over heels.
Me, Park Jimin, Had fallen for Kang Y/n.
So I couldn't lose her.
I couldn't...
"AGH!"
I groan aloud when kicking one last blow and the door lock finally breaks,
whacking open with a thunderous noise of impacting with the wall behind it.
I stumble in, impatient.
And the panorama ahead freezes me from ramming forward. Had I just lost all my sanity?
Widening my eyes at an Y/n that was there laying on the floor helplessly in a puddle of her own blood, I Fall to my knees before letting out a harsh puff of air from my lungs.
"Y/n..."
My voice cracks saying her name.
The other members sprint in behind but stop dead in their tracks, hit by a bolt from the blue.
I perceive Jungkook bawling. At the same time, everything sounded like hollow noises that were nowhere but my head. It echoed in slow motion.
"NAMJOON CALL AN AMBULANCE AND MANAGER-NIM!"
Someone howled from behind and I could make out one of them running off.
Still...
It felt blank.
Like as if I can't hear them when I can.
As if my mind doesn't what to believe this... Accept the truth.
It was nothing but pain. The numbest pain I have ever felt in my life. My breathing shallow, hiccups stuck in my throat as the crack of my own heart-shattering echoes inside my mind.
I gently pick Y/n's head up with my trembling hands, placing it on my lap, and stroke her hair as I had always wished to. Just never this way. God, I never meant it this way.
Before I knew it, Tears were streaming and rolling. Down my cheeks, trailing over my chin, and damped the hair of the girl I loved so dearly.
"I'm sorry..."
I mutter, out of breath.
"I'm so sorry."
Someone places a hand on my back. I didn't realize how nauseous the smell of the blood was. But what sickened me was myself. And the fact that I couldn't be there for her like she was there for me.
I just sat there and sobbed, guilt weighing an unbearable mass over my chest that I knew would never pull off.
[time skip]
[Third person P.O.V]
Their breathing was stuck in their throats.
Namjoon and Yoongi pacing back and forth.
Jin standing there against the wall.
Hoseok consoles the two youngest, Taehyung and Jungkook.
Jimin, resting back... desolated.
The world just turned upside down for him.
His brain kept taunting, reminding him of your lifeless body being dragged into a hospital bed.
Your cry's echoing in his mind making him flinch and groan from time to time.
It was painful for everyone.
But it somehow hit him differently.
His back was pressed against the steel bench he was sitting on, brooding.
It was so lit up yet still felt so murky to him.
Finally, a doctor approaches.
"How is she, uisa-nim?" (doctor)
Namjoon questions along with the manager as soon as they descry the medical practitioner.
"She... has lost a lot of blood. We will have to require a red blood cell transfusion in order to make her hemoglobin and iron level back to normal, if not then she can end up in...
a coma.
Overall, her condition should be stable but it might take a while.
But... One thing.
There were... scars and wounds found all over her arm and thighs
Which we have concluded to take as self-harming.
You should know that she is a young girl and needs someone to talk to about what goes on in her head.
I recommend serious psychological help since her mental health seems anything but alright.
But overall, Everything will be okay."
A sigh leaves Namjoon's lips as his head hangs low, errant.
He feels as though he should've been one of the first people to know if you were struggling, he was the one in charge.
What could've been so bad that caused her to think like this... the Y/n he knew was always so goofy, positive, and making them grin.
But sometimes people are not how they seem to be.
He was only 19, and being a leader had put a big responsibility upon him.
And what he encountered today... really not something an everyday 19-year-old experiences.
But then again, Jungkook was 3 years younger, being a 16-year-old and having to watch that scene, Namjoon knew it wasn't conventional.
[time skip]
Surrounding the bed, the young men gawked at you, agitated.
Jungkook sniffles, his nose red from the crying.
Yoongi feels like he failed you, going through depression himself, at least he should've been able to study your thoughts. Those thoughts he was so used to bellicose through. But he was useless in the end after all.
Hoseok and Namjoon stand by your feet, also inkling flunked.
Jin just simply couldn't glance over, feeling as though he would burst blubber tears. But he shouldn't, he was the oldest one, and he needed to be strong.
Taehyung stands next to Jimin who caressed the scars on your arms that you always hid with full-sleeved clothing, tears once again brimming into his sore eyes.
Your eyes twitch before you open them slightly.
"...y/n..?"
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not me crying at my own story-
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