HARRYs POV

"Okay we need a new approach before he gets any worse, it's been two weeks since he came in and his temperature is still all over the place, as are his white cell counts. Something needs to change" Daniel says.

We are all gathered in Dan's office, Kimberly, myself and the boys. Going over Louis condition and treatment.

"Well, I sense you have something in mind" I say smiling slightly.

Daniel has taken a real liking to Louis and is determined to help him and get him through this. I know he thinks about him constantly and has been worrying a lot about him. When I asked him about it, he confessed that Louis reminded him a lot of his best mate who died 6 years ago from a drug overdose. He was Louis age.

"He has been strapped down to that bed for six days now and it's getting us nowhere, he won't talk to any of us. I think if we start showing him some respect and gain his trust, he will do the same to us. I want to unstrap him and see if it helps" Daniel says.

"I don't know, what if he goes backwards?" Drew asks warily.

"Or what if he runs? He has tried that before" Edward asks

"We strap him back down; he won't be able to get very far if he does run anyway. I think this will work though. He isn't going to eat on his own like he is now, if we want any sort of chance of him helping himself, I think we need to start with letting him make his own choices, with manipulated guidance of course" Daniel says.

"I agree" I pipe up.

"Louis is always wanting control, that's how he got here in the first place, trying to keep control. If we give him a little, it might just work" I say smiling slightly.

"Kimberly?" Scott asks.

"Well, it's worth a shot. I have never seen Louis like this and I'm worried, I've seen plenty of patients go down this road and not come back at all. Like Harry said, control is a real issue for Louis, and this might be the way to go. Like Daniel said it has to be manipulated control, make him think he is making the decision but really, we have been guiding him into the right decision all along" Kimberly says.

"If we can get his mind in a better place, I really think his body will start to heal and he can fight this infection and make a full recovery. If we keep going this way, I know he isn't going to make it" I say honestly.

The boys all nod in agreement.

"So, we have a plan, we are all in agreement?" Daniel asks.

"Yeah" Edward speaks for the boys

"Yes" Kimberly says, and I nod my head

"Alright let's get Louis on the road to recovery then" Daniel smiles out.

LOUIS POV

I haven't spoken or responded to anyone in days, my temperature still won't go down past 38 and I just feel so tired. Harry and Dan are worried, but I don't care. What do I have to live for? A controlling life where I'm watched and monitored and told what to do all the time? No way.

It's day six when Daniel comes into my room alone. I'm still strapped to the bed; I turn my head the other way and don't look at him. He sits down in the chair next to my bed.

"Okay Kiddo listen up, here is the deal. I will untie your hands and unstrap you, if, you can promise me you will not touch the tube in your nose and you will talk to me, Kimberly or Harry, you can choose who you want to talk too. You also have to try and eat at least something so as we can get you healthy enough to take the tube out. What do you say" Daniel asks me.

I want that so badly; I hate being strapped down I can't stand it. If I just keep the tube in until I make it out of the hospital, I can control everything myself when I leave. I'm still hesitant to talk though.

I slowly look towards Daniel and look into his eyes for any sign that he is lying. I don't see any. I sigh.

"We can work together here Louis it doesn't have to be you against us" Daniel says. I sigh.

"Okay" I whisper out.

The smile that comes across his face is so big, like I've just made his week.

"Good boy" he says.

"Now, I'm trusting you here Louis, I'm respecting you and I'd hope you would respect me enough not to try anything okay" he says pointedly.

I just nod my head, I wouldn't try anything in the hospital, I'll wait until I'm home for that.

Daniel begins untying my wrists and the relief I feel when I'm free is amazing. He starts on the straps and when I'm free I feel so much better.

"Does that feel better?" He asks smiling,

I nod at him.

"Now, I'm going to help you sit up okay, then if you are doing okay I will take the catheter out and I will help you to the bathroom for a shower, how does that sound?" He asks.

"Good, yeah" I respond quietly.

He grabs onto my arms and helps me sit up slowly, I feel a bit spacey and lightheaded but I'm okay.

"I'm going to go and get you some water and something small to eat and then if you are okay, we will do the shower. I won't make you talk just yet" he says smiling.

Dan is really nice, and I can't thank him enough for trusting me to do this, I want to do the right thing to keep me free, I don't want to be strapped down anymore.

I nod, I will try my hardest to eat, I suppose the sooner I eat the sooner the tube comes out. I sit up further in the bed as Daniel leaves the room to get me food and water. I rub my wrists, they hurt from the ties, and I have purple bruises around them, nothing I can't handle though. I look around the room and realise I could run again, but if I get caught, I will be strapped down again and probably sent to a facility. I need to play this smart and eat and talk and hopefully I will get out of here quicker. Soon enough Dan comes back into the room with a tray of food and a water and puts it on the table that comes over my bed.

I look at the tray and it has a bowl of chicken soup and some jelly. My breathing picks up and I start absentmindedly playing with my wrists, I see Daniel watching me.

"So, we are just trying here Louis, you don't have to eat much but just try okay" he says, and I nod.

Daniel sits down next to me in the bed and for some reason him being next to me calms me a little.

"Let's do this in steps hey, just pick up the spoon first" Daniel instructs.

I shakily, pick up the spoon and hesitate, the calories of the soup running through my head.

"Good boy, now put some soup on the spoon" he says smiling calmly.

I bring the spoon shakily to bowl and gather a spoonful of soup.

"Now let's bring it to your mouth, go slow"

I then try to bring it to my mouth, I do, and I take the mouthful off the spoon. Daniel is smiling widely at me.

"There you go well done, Louis!" He says excitedly.

I then do it again until the soul is half gone

"I can't, eat anymore" I say shaking my head.

"You have done so well Louis; do you think you could do just one more for me?" Dan asks.

I feel like spewing, but I don't want to disappoint Dan and risk getting strapped down again.

I slowly nod and bring another mouthful to my mouth, I swallow it, but I gag as soon as it hits my stomach. Daniel grabs a vomit bag and I vomit everything that I just ate back up.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry" I croak when I finish.

"Shhhhh it's okay, I shouldn't have pushed you, I should have trusted your limit I'm sorry" Daniel says comforting me.

"Please don't strap me back down" I ask him worriedly

"Its okay Louis, don't stress yourself out. It's going to take some time, I'm not going to strap you back down, you tried Louis and that's all I could have asked for." Daniel tells me.

"I can't even eat properly, I fucking can't do anything right ever" I say angrily.

I push the plate aside and just break down. Daniel wraps his arms around me, I just fall into him and cry. I have so many emotions running through my head, part of me wants to get better but part of me wants to spite everyone and break I'm so confused and angry.

"You know Louis, I used to have a best mate, his name was Sam and he died of a drug overdose when he was your age" he says to me.

Dan sounds quiet and I slowly move my head to look at him

"I'm sorry" I whisper, as I wipe my eyes with my sleeve.

"It was a few years back now, but when he went down that path, we all tried to help him. Me being a doctor in training, I blamed myself when he died. Why couldn't I have helped him more? seen the signs. Why wasn't I good enough for him to trust and bring him back? I......I tried to kill myself about six months after his death, I just felt so guilty" He says sadly and a little bit ashamed.

"I wasn't successful though and it took me a while, but I learnt that I did everything I could to help Sam, and, in the end, it was his choice not to accept the help. As hard as that was to come to terms with, I had to accept it" he says.

"So, you're saying it's my choice and all that, yeah I get it. I have to help myself" I say a little frustratingly.

"What I'm saying is, that you need to find out the reasons why you are doing this. I know you have been through this before, but your reasons have obviously changed, you slipped for a reason what was it?" He asks me.

I think for a moment before I start talking.

"Control, I wanted control of my life. I felt like the boys no matter what I did they always thought the worst of me, thought I couldn't take care of myself, and they were always on my back. I wanted to prove that I could make my own choices and decisions, and, in the end, I was trying to spite them so much that I ended up here" I say truthfully.

"Do you think that risking your life just to spite them was a good choice to make?"

"No, but at least it's my own. I felt like my choices were taken away from me. I was doing so well, and I was fine. Then one tabloid posted some shit about me doing drugs and the boys flipped shit. Suddenly everything I did was wrong; all they would do is yell at me and try to control me. I didn't have a choice to be here, I felt like for six days I was tied to a bed and had no choice about it and I'm so confused. Part of me wants to get better, I do......for me and maybe for Harry. Another part of me just wants to say fuck you and spite everyone and die" I say sniffling.

"And what happens then? Everyone blames themselves and even in a few years when time begins to heal wounds and everyone realises that it was your choice to die, does it make a difference?"

"No, because I'm dead" I whisper.

"And if you choose to live, does it make a difference?"

"I guess, cause I'm alive" I say.

"Yes Louis, because you are alive, and a survivor and you have given yourself and your family the choice to be happy. Your choice" Daniel says.

"But they still want control over me, they have control over me now legally and If I have to go back to them yelling and watching my every move, I won't make it I can't deal with it I......." I start as I begin to get worked up.

"Hey, it's okay Shhhhh, that isn't permanent Louis and once you talk to your brothers about this, I'm sure they will be absolutely gutted that they have contributed to your slip, but once everything is out in the open you will have the chance to work it out and heal, I promise" Daniel finishes.

I let his words sink in for a while and we sit in silence before he breaks it.

"I also think there is a certain curly haired man that would be absolutely devastated if you chose to end it, Louis. You should have seen him when you were on that operating table, he wouldn't let anyone else touch you, he wanted total responsibility for you. When you flatlined he lost it......I nearly called it you know, but he wouldn't give up and two minutes later your heart started beating. Do you know what he said seconds before you came back? He said 'you do this Louis and I'm coming with you' " Dan says.

I gasp and look at him shocked as tears fall from my eyes.

"See......and that just shows he deserves better than me" I say.

"Well Louis, isn't that his choice to make?" Dan tells me with a wink.

I can't help the small smile that spreads across my face for the first time in weeks.

"Now let's get you up for that shower hey" Dan smiles at me.

I have a lot to think about and decide......I'm beginning to realise that I do have control, I just need to make sure I respect myself enough to use it correctly.

Daniel helps me to get out of bed after a nurse comes to remove my catheter. It's still so painful to move but I'm so glad to be able to. As my feet hit the ground, I'm hit with a wave of dizziness, and I fall forward Dan catching me.

"Woah, take it slow Lou, it's okay if we stand here for a while until you get your balance" he says.

Just then Harry walks into the room.

"Lou, hey wow! look at you" he says beaming at me.

I can't help but give him a small smile in return.

"Hey Harry, I was just going to help Louis into the shower, but I have a few patients to attend to, would you mind taking over?" Dan says and I don't miss the wink he gives Harry. I can't help but blush.

"Of course, is that okay Lou?" Harry asks.

"Yeah" I whisper out smiling slightly

My heart is going a million miles a minute, and the heart rate monitor shows it, I can't help but blush.

They don't bring it to my attention though and Harry takes Dan's place standing next to me. Dan leaves me with a promise to talk soon and a wink. Harry disconnects me from the machines and leads me slowly to the bathroom, he grabs a new pair of sweats and a T-shirt from my bag the boys brought me, along the way.

When we are inside, he locks the door and turns the shower on, making sure it's the right temperature. He then helps me undress and I can't help but whimper. I'm so sore and I don't want Harry to be disgusted by what he sees. When I'm naked I try to cover up, but he stops me.

"Louis, please don't, you are beautiful baby so beautiful" he says.

I can't help the tears that escape my eyes though, Harry thumbs them away and kisses my forehead.

"Come on let's get you clean; you need to get back into bed" he says.

I wash myself for the first time in two weeks and it feels amazing, my hair is washed by Harry, and I brush my teeth. I forgot how good it felt to be clean, I feel a little more Normal.

After I'm dried and dressed by Harry, we begin walking back to the bed. I have to stop several times to catch my breath and cough. I'm still so weak.

"It's okay Lou, take your time" Harry says.

"Why am I like this Harry, I feel so worthless and stupid" I say.

"Hey, you are not worthless or stupid Louis, you are sick and it's going to take time, don't rush yourself" he tells me.

He turns me so I'm facing him and cups my cheeks, we stare into each other's eyes.

"You are amazing and beautiful, and funny and smart Louis" he says sincerely.

Tears well in my eyes.

"I am..... I'm so sorry" I say as the tears fall.

"Hey, what are you sorry for baby" he asks me, his eyes are genuinely concerned.

"I'm sorry I pushed you away, I'm sorry I was mad at you and angry and such a dick to you Harry" I say looking back at him.

"Oh, Lou no, don't you apologise, I need to be the one apologising. I'm so sorry I hurt you, I promise you, I will never ever hurt you again baby ever" Harry says.

Suddenly his lips are on mine, and I feel all my breath leave my throat, I don't know how I ever survived without his kisses. The kiss turns heated until I lean back and have to catch my breath.

"Just breathe Lou" Harry says cupping my face.

"Does this mean you and I can be together Louis!" Harry asks me.

I stare at him reading every emotion on his face and in his eyes before I reply.

"Harry......I'm so confused about everything. I'm not mad at you anymore I'm not, I understand why you left. It is what it is, I have to move on...we have to move on. It's just, the boys...everyone expected me to fall into your arms, like I should be thankful you came back and thankful that you still want to be with me. The boys expect you to fix me and I don't want that.... I want to fix myself before we even start a relationship. I want you around Harry I do, I can't do this without you, but. I don't want to start a relationship like this, I'm sorry" I say.

I'm scared to look at Harry at his reaction to my words, I don't want him to hate me.

"Louis, I understand, and I think that decisions just shows how serious you are about getting better, and I want you to get better for you not me. I'm not going to let you get away though Louis, I'm here and we will get you through this together. I'll wait Louis. I'll wait forever for you" Harry says to me.

I smile at him, and he smiles his dazzling smile back at me, Harry helps me back into bed and hooks me up to the machines again. He then slips in beside me in the bed and I fall asleep with my head on his chest and a slight smile on my face.