Louis POV

I'm woken once again to my phone blaring. I really need to remember to put it on silent. I don't look at the caller ID and I regret it once I answer, and I'm being yelled at.

"Louis William Tomlinson, what the fuck do you think you are doing?" Andy's voice yells.

"Huh?" I ask, trying to process what's happening and trying to wake up properly.

"You know perfectly well what I'm talking about kid, I got a call from Cameron last night updating me on your latest antics Louis" he says and he sounds disappointed.

"Oh yeah! I went out Andy, last time I checked it wasn't a crime" I say sassily back.

"No Louis but doing drugs and partying with guys old enough to be your dad is not okay" he spits back.

"Says who? You? Why can't you just leave me alone, why do I have to answer to you, I just went out to a club" I yell back at him.

"I am your older brother Louis and as much as you think you don't have to answer to me or Scott, Drew or Edward I'm sorry, but you do" Andy yells.

"You're not my father Andy and neither is Scott or the boys." I yell.

"No Louis, our father left us, he left you, abandoned you, he doesn't want anything to do with you. So yeah, the boys and I are the closest thing to a father you will ever have" Andy says.

"Maybe when I was 17 but I don't need you to look after me anymore, I don't need you or them watching my every move, I'm fine" I yell frustratingly.

"You are far from fine Louis, we know you too well, we know the signs" Andy says.

"No Andy, you think you know the signs, but you have no fucking idea" I yell.

I hear Andy sigh on the end of the line.

"Come home Louis, we have booked you extra sessions with Kimberly, stay for a few weeks, get back on track again... Please" Andy asks me desperately.

"No Andy, no way! You only want me there so you can watch my every move and control me. It's not happening, I don't need help getting back on any track" I snap.

"It wasn't a request, Louis; I was just trying to give you the chance to make the right decision"

"I'm 21 Andy, you can't make me do anything, I'm fine, my life is fine. I'm not relapsing and I'm not doing drugs.... please just get off my back" I yell frustratingly.

"Louis, I know about the drugs, Cameron told me everything, that Harry was worried enough to want to take you to the hospital, how do you not see that this is becoming dangerous" Andy asks me.

"It was the one and only time I've tried anything Andy, and I had a reaction, I won't do it ever again, it doesn't mean I'm heading off the rails" I say, trying to calm down.

"What about you skipping meals again huh? I know what's in your fridge Louis, I know there is no food in your cupboards" he says.

"What? What are you even talking about, there is food in my fridge it's full" I lie angrily.

"So, there isn't two cucumbers and a bag of lemons then?" Andy asks smugly.

"How the......Cameron" I realise.

"Get your ass home Louis, you have one month to cancel your commitments and organise some time off, we expect you home in one month Louis, indefinitely " Andy says and hangs up.

What the hell? Indefinitely my fucking ass......I'm so fucking angry. I knew I shouldn't have given Cameron that key. I angrily get off my bed and pull on a pair of sweats and a grey T-shirt. I march straight out the door and straight to the lift. Why can't they just stop interfering with my life, it's actually making me want to rebel more. I feel like I want to go out and party just to spite them.

I press the button for Cameron's floor. Andy and the boys have obviously been asking Cameron to snoop around and report back to them, I wonder if Harry has been doing it too. When I reach Cameron's floor, I stomp down the hallway completely infuriated, when I reach his door, I bang loudly. He answers, wearing his nice slick work suit, he must be on his lunch break. He takes in my dishevelled state and looks at me confused.

"Lou?" He says,

"I want my fucking key back Cameron" I say angrily.

"What, why?" He asks dumbstruck.

"Had an interesting call from Andy before and I realised you have been sneaking around my flat, looking through my cupboards, reporting back to them" I yell.

"Louis, just calm down, I'm sorry okay I'm just worried" he says.

"How many fucking times do I have to tell you to stop worrying?" I ask upset.

"You have to admit it looks pretty bad Lou" Cam says

"I don't have to admit anything, I just needed to go grocery shopping, I have been busy with work, and I haven't had a chance. You didn't have to go behind my back, I thought you were my friend" I yell.

"I am your friend, that's why I'm trying to help" Cameron days desperately.

"Friends don't go behind each other's backs Cameron, my key please" I ask holding out my hand.

Cameron sighs and goes inside to retrieve my key; he returns and hands it over hesitantly. I don't say anything more I just turn to walk back to the lift.

"Louis?" Cameron says.

I turn around to face him.

"I'm not giving up on you Louis, you can shut me out all you like but it won't work" he says with determination. Before he slams his door shut.

I sigh. Just because I've done drugs twice and I'm skipping some meals means nothing, why can't they just understand that, let me make my own mistakes and allow me to figure stuff out myself.

When I get back to my apartment, I realise it's already 2:30pm I have to meet Harry in half an hour. I change into my skinny jeans and grey long sleeve sweater and put my vans on. I walk out of my flat and into the streets of London. I try to calm myself down, I'm so angry at my brothers and Cameron. I bet Harry was in on everything too, I'm looking forward to giving him a piece of my mind as well. There is no fucking way I'm going home; they can't make me. The only reason they want me there is so they can control me and make themselves feel better. What about me though, it's like they have forgotten about me and my feelings and what's important to me. They are trying to fix me and force things that they think are good for me on me, when they just need to leave me alone to get it together myself.

I understand that they think Harry would be good for me again and I can't help but agree in some way, I miss him I really do, but it's my decision to make as to whether I want him in my life again. If he is going to try and control me like the boys, I don't want anything to do with him. I want him to want to be friends with me because he likes me for me, not because he feels like he has to fix me.

When I reach the hospital, I walk up the steps and through the entrance, I can see I'm being recognised, and some people are taking photos of me. I try to ignore them as best I can. I reach the Emergency Department and I enter the waiting room.

"May I help you?" A young nurse from behind the counter asks, her name tag reads Mel.

"Um, I'm just here to see Harry Styles" I say shyly.

"Louis Tomlinson?" She asks.

"Yeah, that would be me" I smile slightly.

"Dr Styles is expecting you, if you would just come this way" she says and stands up.

I follow her through a set of doors and down a corridor towards a huge desk in the middle of a room. There are two doctors and a bunch of nurses standing around laughing, it seems quiet with no patients around. I instantly spot Harry, wearing navy blue scrubs, his hair pulled back into a bun, he looks sexy as fuck God dam it. I can't help but admire him from afar, I may be staring but I don't care. When Harry sees me, he smiles his big, dimpled smile and rounds the desk to greet me.

"Lou!" He says. His smile is so bright, I can't help but return it.

"Hey" I say.

"How are you? I'm so glad you came" he says, looking at me like I'm the only one in the room.

"Of course, I'd come Harry, I said I would" I smile.

"Come, let me introduce you to everyone" Harry says proudly.

He walks me over to the other doctor and nurses and introduces me. They all seem really nice and friendly. Daniel the other doctor seems older than Harry but only by a few years and the nurses are young and pretty. It's like a 'greys anatomy' hospital with hot doctors and good-looking nurses everywhere.

"We didn't believe Harry here was friends with the famous Louis Tomlinson, but I guess it's true" one of the nurses says.

I can't help but snort.

"I'm not that famous, I just stand in front of a camera, I'm sure you guys do a lot more amazing things than me, but Yeah, I've known Harry since I was born" I tell her smiling.

"Believe me Louis you are plenty famous, I'm pretty sure the nurses drool over your pictures regularly" Doctor Dan says smirking, causing the nurses to blush.

"We are not as bad as Harry" one of the blonde nurses laughs out.

I can't help but laugh at Harry's embarrassed face.

"Okay that's my cue to leave, see you all tomorrow" Harry says laughing.

"Ohhh, well Louis we will have to invite you back in to tell us all the gossip that surrounds the infamous Dr Harry Styles" Doctor Daniel says.

He then looks towards Harry and the way he is looking at Harry makes my blood run cold; he is smirking and it's like he is undressing him with his eyes, and I actually feel a pang of jealousy.

"Oh, I have a lot of gossip about young Harold here, we used to date, so I know all his intimate secrets and I'd love to share " I say sassily waggling my eyebrows.

Harry's eyes bulge out of his head and Dr Daniel blushes profusely. While a few nurses snort with laughter.

"Alright their Louis, time to go I think" Harry looks flabbergasted at me.

I smile crookedly at him as he leads me towards the exit. I wave goodbye innocently to the staff while Harry shakes his head at me however, I can see the fond smile on his lips.

Just as we are leaving though, an emergency call comes in, a teenage car crash victim in a critical condition is enroute to the hospital. Everybody scrambles to get ready for the arrival.

"Harry, we may need you, could you maybe stick around for a few minutes just to make sure" Daniel asks of Harry.

Harry looks towards me for permission.

"Of course, Harry, you don't even have to ask" I say back.

The following minutes unravel before me, and I watch on as a teenager is rushed into one of the emergency cubicles. The curtain is left open, and I can see everything that's going on, she looks really hurt, there is blood everywhere. Dr Daniel is assessing the girl and the nurses are scrambling around getting things organised at his instructions. My eyes are glued to the scene. Flashes of my accident start to come back to me, the blood and the dead eyes of Stan that regularly haunt my dreams.

"Are you okay Louis?" Harry brings me back from my thoughts.

I breathe in and out.

"Yeah, I'm, I'm okay....is she going to be okay Haz?" I ask concerned.

Harry looks at me worriedly.

"I'm not sure Lou" he tells me sympathetically placing his hand on my shoulder.

"Can you save her Harry?" I ask.

This is too close to home; I remember what Ashton and Luke were like in the back of the car and Joey's dead body on the side of the road. For some reason I need to know that the girl is okay, she is so young and that could have so easily have been me. Her family must be worried sick, waiting to hear whether she is going to be okay.

"Dan, do you need me?" Harry yells to Daniel.

"I should be good Styles, thanks mate" He yells back.

Harry starts trying to drag me out of the ER gently, but I don't budge.

"Come on Lou, you don't need to see this" Harry says gently, but my eyes are fixed on the girl in the room.

"I want to know she is okay Harry" I whisper.

"Louis, the doctors are doing the best they can okay. Come on you don't need to re-live this Louis" Harry says.

I tear my eyes away from the girl in the bed to look at Harry.

"I'm sorry I just, I can't help it" I say.

"I know Lou" Harry says as our eyes meet in understanding.

Suddenly, there is a really loud beeping noise.

"She's crashing" Dr Daniel yells.

Harry turns to the room worriedly.

"Styles" Daniel yells.

"Lou, I need to go help okay, I want you to leave, can you do that for me? Go wait in the waiting room, I will be there as soon as I can" Harry says quickly.

I just nod and watch him go but I don't move

"Louis go!" He yells.

I don't listen though; I'm stuck in my spot watching the whole ordeal unfold before me. I focus on Harry working and I can honestly say he is amazing. Shouting instructions and working fast to put a breathing tube down the girl's throat. A defib machine is used on her chest to try and get her heart beating again. Harry yells more instructions, and the girl lifts off the bed, but she still has a flat line. I'm frozen in my spot tears threatening to spill down my cheeks at the emotional scene in front of me.

"Clear!" Harry yells again.

He places the paddles on her chest once more and shocks the girl again, but again, it's a flatline.

"We're losing her Daniel" Harry says.

Daniel starts chest compressions and tries to get her back. The nurses administer certain things in her drip, but she isn't responding. 10 minutes later and Harry calls it.

"She's gone, time of death 15:45" Harry says.

Silence follows as the doctors all realise, they have just lost a patient, such a young life.

I'm left speechless I can't believe that just happened. I can't move. Harry looks up and our eyes meet, the look on his face breaks my heart. He looks defeated but concerned for me. The nurses take over and Daniel and Harry share a hug. They exchange a few words and separate. Daniel goes to talk to the family in the waiting room and Harry walks towards me.

"Are you okay Lou?" Harry asks as he places his hands on my shoulders and looks me in the eyes.

"Um, she died?" I ask in a whisper.

"Yeah Lou, we just couldn't save her" Harry states.

"But.....why? She was so young" I say. I'm trying to come to terms with what I just saw.

"I know, but her Injuries were quite severe" Harry tells me.

I look him in the eyes and nod.

"Let's get you out of here hey, go get some tea" Harry says and he leads me out of the room and towards a locker room.

Harry changes from his scrubs to jeans and a grey sweater and grabs his backpack. We then walk in silence to the coffee shop around the corner. When we walk in, we are instantly met with warmth, and it relaxes me.

"Go take a seat Lou, I'll order" Harry says.

I don't even argue, I just nod and go to sit down at a booth. Harry comes over a few minutes later with my tea and a coffee for him and of course my tea is made the way I like it, Harry remembered how I take my tea, I smile slightly. He has also brought two Apple muffins. I thank him and start sipping my tea. I don't touch the muffin.

"I don't know how you do that every day Haz" I say, looking up from my tea and into Harry's eyes.

"All part of the job Lou, as insensitive as it sounds, you get used to it" Harry's says.

"Well, I don't think I could get used to it. You were amazing Harry, like truly amazing, you make a great doctor" I say smiling at him.

Harry smiles his big, dimpled smile back at me.

"Thanks Louis" he says sincerely.

"So how was your day?" He asks.

"Fine didn't do much, I've got another week off before my campaign starts with H&K" I tell him.

"Awesome, so what do you have to do for the campaign?" Harry asks.

I explain to him about the whole campaign and what is involved and that I will be on billboards in my underwear.

"Well, I just might have to make sure I go the long way to work so I can see the billboard every morning" Harry smiles out.

I snort.

"Well, that Doctor Dan would probably be heartbroken knowing your looking at another man Harry" I smile cheekily.

It's then Harry's turn to snort.

"I doubt that Lou, anyway I have my eye on someone else" he says smirking.

"Haz" I say but I can't help my smile

"I know I'm sorry, look, can we just start again Lou, please can we just get to know each other again as friends. We have both changed a lot in the last four years and I think we should just start over" Harry says sincerely.

That actually sounds like a good idea, I think I could maybe do that. Seeing Harry in action makes me feel a little guilty that I wanted him to even contemplate not going to LA to study. Harry was made to be a doctor and the thought of me being the reason that he didn't do it, makes me instantly sick. I now understand why Harry had to leave; it still hurts like fuck, but I am beginning to understand that he needed to do it. Harry is clearly amazing at his job. We have both changed a lot and have grown over the last four years and being here now, sitting with Harry feels right. Even if we aren't meant to be together maybe fate wants us to be friends. I can't deny that I feel safe and happy when I'm around Harry. I feel like I can be myself for once and maybe being friends again would be a good thing.

"I... think I could do that yeah, but I need you to promise me Harry......the boys are trying to make me go home, Cameron has been snooping around my apartment and they think I'm going off the rails...... I'm not Harry, I'm just having a bit of fun and I'm not relapsing, and I just need you to not try and fix things to just trust me and be my friend, please" I say looking into his eyes.

"Louis, I will do anything to be in your life again" Harry starts.

"But Harry, I want you to be in my life because of me, because you like me now and want to be around who I am now. Not because you think you owe me something and definitely not because you think you need to fix me. I trust you Harry as much as I try to tell myself not too, I do. I trust you to tell me the truth" I say looking up at him through my fringe.

"Louis, I can promise you now, from the bottom of my heart that I am not here to fix you, I'm not here to hound you about your life. I'm here to be your friend and eventually I really hope something more. I'm still in love with you Louis and if you want to take it slow and start out as friends, I want that too. I'm here for you Louis and I will be here until you send me away" Harry says his green eyes relaying all his emotions.

There is silence for a while, we just stare at each other.

" I can do what you ask Louis but promise me that you will come to me if you need help Louis, come to me if you ever need to. I will respect your wishes if you would please respect mine" Harry says, breaking our silence.

I mull over his words for a few seconds then smile shyly at him.

"Okay.... agreed" I say.

We go back to chatting and drinking coffee together, I missed Harry and his laugh so much. We finish up our drinks and Harry his muffin. I pick at mine but Harry, true to his word doesn't say anything.

We walk out of the coffee shop and down the sidewalk. People have noticed who I am, and the camera phones are pulled out and pictures are snapped as I pass. I hope the paps won't show up anytime soon.

On our way home we pass the magazine stand and again I see the gossip magazines. On the front of one of them the headline reads.

'Louis Tomlinson, parties, drugs and older men' I pick it up and sigh.

There are pictures of me coming out of the club with Zach, Noah, Nathan and Aiden the other night. Why can't they just leave me alone. It was the second time I've been clubbing like ever and it's made to look like I do it all the time.

Harry walks up next to me and takes the magazine out of my hands.

"Come on Lou, let's get you home, don't worry about what it says" he says smiling as he puts the magazine back.

"There is nothing going on between Zach and I Harry, he is the photographer for H&K and I just went clubbing with him and his friends, I was just having some fun.

"It's okay Lou, you don't have to tell me, I just want you to be safe" Harry tells me. I just nod.

We keep walking and as we round the corner into our street, we see the paps waiting in front of the entry doors of our apartments. I stop in my tracks and freeze. Harry looks at me confused as to why I stopped then looks down the street.

"It's okay, I'm here Lou, I won't let anything happen" Harry tells me sincerely.

"I don't want to face them Harry, they are rough and push and pull at me, I hate it" I say.

"Listen, let me put my hand around your waist and I'll guide you in okay. I won't let them hurt you" Harry says.

I nod in response as the paps see us at the end of the street. Suddenly they are running towards us.

"Louis" they yell.

Harry puts his arm around my waist tightly and I instantly feel safe. His strong arms guide me through the mob.

"Louis, is this your new boyfriend?"

"How old is he Louis?"

"What's his name?"

They all yell as the flashes get brighter, Harry never lets me go and I find myself leaning into him a lot more. The mob starts pushing and I'm grabbed out of Harry's grip and surrounded. I panic, I try to push through to get to Harry but it's pointless I can't move. My breathing picks up and I can feel myself being swallowed. I can hear Harry's voice yelling, telling everyone to back off. I then feel his strong arms around me, and I'm pulled towards him again. He guides me the rest of the way and when we make it inside the lobby and into the lift, I fall against him.

"Are you okay?" Harry asks.

I just nod my head evening out my breaths.

"Just breathe Lou" Harry says, hugging me close.

"Does this happen every time?" He asks

I just nod my head as I calm down.

"I really think you need security or something when you go out Lou, that was intense, I was actually scared you were going to get crushed" Harry says.

"Yeah maybe" I say as we reach our floor.

We walk in silence for a moment just calming down.

"Thank you for today, Harry, I um had fun" I say shyly.

"Me too Lou, let's do it again okay " Harry says, making sure as not to force anything on me.

"Yeah I'd actually......yeah I'd love too" I say smiling.

We say our goodbyes and walk into our separate apartments. I actually had a really nice time with Harry, and he respected my wishes. I feel really happy. I think I may need to think about a security guard like Harry said though, Harry won't be around to protect me all the time and I'm not really the most intimidating looking guy when it comes to pushing myself through a mob. I put it on my list of things to do and I walk into the kitchen. I take down my rice crackers from the cupboard and I open the packet and start to eat. Being with Harry today has actually put me in such a good mood that I feel good enough about myself to eat and I do, with a smile on my face.