Last Chapter Guys, There is a Sequel to this - with a happy ending, I will put it up asap

Louis POV.

A MEMORIAL HAS BEEN SET UP FOR THE THREE TEENAGERS THAT WERE KILLED ON HIGHWAY 95 THREE NIGHTS AGO. THE POLICE HAVE DETERMINED THAT SPEED AND DRINKING WAS THE CAUSE OF DEATH AND THEY WANT ALL TEENAGERS TO REALISE THE DANGERS OF UNDERAGE DRINKING.

The TV before me booms, another reminder of what's happened.

"Turn it off Lou" Scott says as he enters my room and sits next to me on the bed.

I comply and turn the TV off; I sit up and sigh. The boys have not left my side for more than a few hours since the crash. They are worried I'm going to relapse into my eating disorder and spiral out of control. To tell the truth I was worried too but I just feel numb about the whole thing.

Luke and Mikey are ok but will be in hospital for a while with quite severe Injury's. Mr Charles has been arrested and charged with child pornography. Apparently, the police raided his house and found loads of it as well as pictures of me everywhere. It was a little scary to find out, but he has already been sentenced to 10 years in prison so there is no chance he will be let off. I'm so relieved, I never want to think of that asshole again. I don't want to go back to school though and see or face anyone for that matter, I can't go back to the rumours and the whispers. It's all too much.

Andy, Scott and Kimberly have arranged for me to finish the year at home and have it not interfere with my Oxford application, thank god.

"Are you ready to go Lou, we have that appointment with Kimberly" Scott says.

Apparently, Kimberly wants a meeting with all the boys and Harry first, then one with me afterwards.

"Yeah, I guess" I say.

Scott helps me up off the bed and hands me my crutches. I'm still sore and bruised and finding it hard to move around properly. He helps me down the stairs and to the car.

The drive to Kimberly's office is quiet. I sit in Harry's lap and put my head against his chest. As always Harry has been amazing and hasn't left my side. He has asked to see Kimberly for a few sessions though, just to talk through what he saw and about what could have happened. He is having trouble dealing with the fact I nearly lost my life, and he couldn't have stopped it.

We pull up to Kimberley's and all pile out of the car, Harry's hand grips mine like a vice and we all walk in. Kimberly is quick to greet us.

"Hi boys, how is everyone?" She asks politely.

The boys all greet her back warmly.

"Ok Louis sweetheart, can you wait in the waiting room for me?" Kimberly asks.

I nod my head and release Harry's hand; I turn around and walk to the chairs. I sit down and watch as the boys all walk into the room, and I know it's to talk about me.

Harry's POV

I reluctantly leave Louis in the waiting room, and we head inside the office. We all take a seat on the couch, me next to Drew, Kimberly sits across from us. Once we are all settled, she starts.

"So how are you all holding up?" She asks.

"Yeah ok, we are ok" Scott says and Kimberly nods.

"Harry?" She asks.

"I'm ok, just... I don't want to let Louis out of my sight, when he isn't with me, I find it hard to not worry about him. I don't want anything to happen too him" I say truthfully.

Drew rests his hand on my thigh and I'm thankful for his support.

"Harry, that is a perfectly normal reaction to what you saw and what could have happened. Louis is very lucky. You need to remember though, he is here with us and alive and as much as we want to control him and life and keep him safe, we can't. I know it's hard right now, god it's only been three days, but it will get easier" she says.

We all agree with her, I know she is right. As much as I want to keep Louis in a safe bubble, I know I can't and I eventually need to let him out if my sight again.

"How is Louis?" She asks and it's like we all sigh at the same time.

"He seems to be ok" Andy says.

"And that's what scares us" Edward adds.

"He has dropped off in eating a little and I know he has had nightmares and hasn't slept much the last few days, but other than that he seems ok" Scott says.

"How so?" Kimberly asks.

"Well, he hasn't closed himself off, he is talking through everything. I know he says he doesn't blame himself, but I know a part of him does, but he wants to be around us, he wants to talk" Edward says.

"So why does it scare you?" Kimberly asks.

"Because, what if it's a facade. What if inside he is just dying and blaming himself and hiding things from us again? What if we don't notice and he gets so lost again and does........ something" Drew asks

"You mean what if he tries too unalive himself?" Kimberly clarifies.

"Yeah" Drew says looking down at his shoes.

"Well, I really think you guys need to give Louis some credit. This is exactly what we want Louis to be doing. Instead of worrying if he is breaking, just encourage him to keep talking. I think what's happening and how he is reacting is positive." Kimberly tells us.

"Harry, has your relationship changed at all? Has Louis become distant or the opposite, has he become clingy?" She asks me.

"No, neither of those things, he is fine. He does want to cuddle a bit more but other than that, he is the same" I tell her.

"Well boys overall, I think this is very positive. Let me talk to Louis about his feelings and see where he is at. I think we should still up the sessions to two a week until graduation, but I think Louis is going to come though this stronger than before" Kimberly says.

We all smile and breathe a sigh of relief as we finish up the session. I know Louis is going to be alright and I really think moving to London is just what we both need. I just pray that my acceptance letter comes soon.

Louis POV

As I walk into Kimberley's office and the boys all walk out. They all smile at me; the session must have gone well then. I sit on the couch like usual and Kimberly sits opposite me.

"So, Lou, the boys have said they think you are doing ok. What do you think?" She asks me.

I just shrug my shoulders at her.

"You don't seem in the mood to talk today" she says, and I just look down in my lap.

"The boys said they have noticed you dropping your food intake a little and that you are having nightmares again" she says to me.

I snap my head up to her. How they notice everything is just crazy. I'm so worried this means I'm relapsing or I'm not going to be able to cope.

"Does that scare you, Louis? Does it scare you that you might be relapsing and maybe not realise it?"

"I don't know.... I don't feel like I'm relapsing, I haven't been hungry. I've been tired but I don't feel like I need to throw up to cope or anything. I just feel numb" I tell her truthfully.

"Do you blame yourself Louis?" She asks.

And that sets me off, I start crying my eyes out.

"No.....I don't, and I feel so so so guilty that I don't blame myself, that I hate them. It was their fault that it happened, they chose to drink and drug me, and they crashed the car not me, it wasn't me, but I feel guilty" I say frustratingly.

"I understand Louis, and the way you are expressing your feelings and explaining things to me I know we can deal with this. I've got some new things to try with you. What do you say? The first step was admitting that you understand it wasn't your fault, but the next part is helping you to learn to live with that guilt you're feeling, because that's completely unwarranted" she says to me.

I nod my head at her, and we go on with the session. By the end I feel more like myself again. I know I have a long road, but I know the signs of relapsing and know when I need to step back and ask for help. I know that I'm going to have to deal with the guilt I feel and the nightmares I'm having but I've done it before, and I'm determined to do it again.

It's two weeks later when I'm standing in the kitchen making myself a healthy snack when Drew comes running into the room.

"Louis, guess what!!!" Drew asks.

"What D?" I ask laughing at his enthusiasm a little.

"Guess what I got?" He asks

"What?"

"My college acceptance letter, I can't open it, I'm too nervous" he says holding it and shaking it in the air. "Oh, yours is here too" he says.

He then proceeds to hand me a plain white envelope. My heart stops. My whole future is riding on what's inside this letter. I'm so nervous. I know if I don't get into Oxford though, I will follow Harry to London anyway and do some classes at the local uni to gain more credit so I can apply to Oxford next year. Harry and I have it all planned out.

"Why don't I open yours for you and you open mine?" I suggest.

"Ok yeah, yeah, let's do it" Drew says.

We swap envelopes just as the boys all come through the doorway. Perfect timing.

"What are you two up too?" Andy asks.

"We got our collage acceptance letters today. We are opening each other's" Drew tells them.

They all smile and come closer to us, excited to hear the news.

"Ok I'll open yours first D" I say.

I open the envelope and unfold the paper.

"To Mr Drew Tomlinson,

We are pleased to announce you have been selected on a football scholarship to attend the university of Ireland, congratulations" I read out.

"Way to go Drew!!!" The boys sing song congratulations to him.

I jump over to give him a huge hug, I am so happy for Drew. This is everything he has wanted from the start of high school. Ireland has one of the best football teams in the world and this is huge for Drew.

"Ok your turn Lou" Drew says.

I watch in anticipation as he opens the envelope. He reads it over first before he says anything. I see his face drop and I prepare for the bad news.

"Dear Mr Louis Tomlinson,

We are pleased to offer you a full early entry scholarship to Oxford university. Your major to be determined at a later date. Congratulations" Drew screams.

I can't help the smile that takes over my face. I did it, I actually did it. I'm suddenly engulfed and lifted off the floor as the boys all congratulate me and hug me stupid. I can't believe this. I'm actually so proud of myself.

"We are so so proud of you both guys, this is amazing" Andy tells us.

"We couldn't have done it without you guys, all of you have been absolutely amazing and supportive and if it wasn't for you, we know we wouldn't have even had a chance" Drew says.

"Yeah, I know I never would have gotten this far if it wasn't for you. Thank you so much" I choke out.

We all share a tear and more hugs before we pull away from each other.

"I've got to go and tell Harry" I say.

The boys laugh at me as I hobble on my cast to my room to message Harry to come over.

Harry comes over an hour later. He is dressed casually in sweats and a white long sleeve shirt with a dark blue beanie on his head. He makes my mouth water. He is so hot. I can't believe how lucky I am to have him in my life. I shake myself out of my thoughts and jump into Harry's arms. Causing him to laugh.

"Hey there baby, I'm glad to see you too" Harry smirks at me.

He places me down carefully on my feet and leans down. He kisses me so gently and the kiss becomes heated. I pull away breathless.

"Lou, I have something to tell you baby, can we talk?" He asks me.

"I have something to tell you too Haz" I say excitedly.

Harry smiles at me and my enthusiasm and tells me to go first.

"Well....I got my letter today, I'm officially an Oxford university student" I smile out.

"Lou baby, god I'm so proud of you! I knew you could do it baby. God, I love you" Harry says and leans down to kiss me again.

It slowly becomes heated and before I can get too carried away, I pull back.

"What did you have to tell me?" I ask.

Harry seems torn to say something.

"Nothing baby, nothing, it can wait. Right now, I just want you" Harry says as he pulls me closer to him and walks me backwards towards the bed.

He lays me down and continues his assault on my mouth. I've missed Harry's touch so much. Harry knows I'm still sore from the accident, so he is gentle, so gentle. His touch is feather lite and for some reason it turns me on so much more. Harry takes his time undressing me and kissing every inch of my body, like he is worshipping me or something. I have a feeling something is up, but I push the thought aside so as I can just be with Harry. Smell him and kiss him and feel him. Harry starts opening me up with his fingers and when he is pushing into me with his cock I gasp. He is so slow with his movements and is holding me so close to him. He starts moving gently and so slowly. He makes eye contact with me the whole time and I'm so lost in him and how good he feels inside me. I never, ever want to experience this with anyone else. Harry is my forever and when he tells me to come, and I do so on command at the exact same time as him. I know I will never love someone else as much as I do Harry.

We lie breathless together coming down from our highs, warm in each other's arms. Just breathing each other in.

"I'm so proud of you Lou, you will be amazing at Oxford. I know you will smash anything you want to do" he says to me.

I look up into his eyes and see something I don't want to see. Regret? I'm not sure, but I know Harry is hiding something from me.

"Haz, what's going on? Are you ok? What did you need to tell me?" I ask, my voice is shaky, and I'm so petrified of the answer.

"Lou" Harry sits up.

He puts his sweats back on and I put mine on and we both cross our legs facing each other on the bed.

I look towards Harry with scared eyes. I think I know what's coming and I really don't know if I can handle it.

"Louis, I... I didn't get into Oxford" Harry tells me.

My heart has just broken, we didn't really account for this to happen.

"What? What do you mean? that's ok you can just do what I was going to do if I didn't get in, you can take classes at the community college and apply again next year right?" I say back hurriedly.

When Harry doesn't reply though I start to get worried.

"Right Haz?" I ask again, tears threatening to spill down my face. I can see Harry's eyes fill with tears.

"Baby, I... I didn't get into Oxford...but I got into UCLA in LA, in America to study medicine. I didn't tell you I applied there because I didn't think I'd make it. It was just on a whim I applied. I never ever thought I'd get accepted Lou, but I did and it's the best medical program in the whole world Lou. I have to go" Harry tells me.

I can't breathe. My world is coming crashing down before my eyes and I can't catch it, I feel myself falling. I'm angry so angry and upset that Harry kept this from me.

"So, you applied and didn't think to tell me? Even if there was the slightest hope you would get picked you didn't tell me!! What is that saying Haz? That's saying that you planned to go without me if you got in. That you didn't tell me knowing perfectly well you were going on your own if you were accepted" I rush out crying.

"No Lou, I honestly didn't think I'd make it" he tries

"Then why apply Harry and more importantly why apply and not tell me so I had the chance to apply too. I would have followed you to the end of the earth Harry... If you had given me the chance but you didn't, and I understand why now" I say my face dropping as I look at my lap.

"Lou, that's not true at all, I would give anything so you could come with me. I don't want to leave you baby" Harry tells me cupping my cheeks.

"Fine, I'll come with you, I'll defer Oxford. I'll get credits so I can apply to UCLA, we can be together" I say bringing hope back into the situation.

"No Lou, I can't let you do that. You are not moving your life around for me. I won't let you" Harry tells me, dropping his hands.

"What? That's not your decision to make, you can't decide that without me, that's not fair" I yell at him.

"Louis you need to go to Oxford and become someone great, become who I know you can be. It's your dream Lou" Harry tells me.

"Then come with me then, please Harry come with me" I say knowing perfectly well I'm being so selfish in asking him, but I don't know if I can bear not being with Harry.

"Lou, you know I can't do that. I....... I can't " Harry starts.

"Give your life up for me, like everyone else has done" I say looking down again.

"Lou" Harry starts.

"It's fine Haz, I understand. I always knew you would move on to bigger and better things, I always knew I wasn't good enough for you Haz. I know how great you will be in America. You will become the best doctor out there and I hope you find someone who is worthy of you. Don't settle for just anyone Haz, you deserve the best and I'm so sorry I couldn't be that for you" I finish choking on my sobs.

"Lou no baby" Harry starts.

"Please Harry this is hard enough, please just leave, just get out" I say raising my voice.

I watch as Harry contemplates his options, he hesitates but places a kiss on my forehead and walks to the door, tears streaming down his face, he turns to me.

"Goodbye baby" he says.

And he walks out of my room and out of my life for good. My heart completely shatters in my chest, and I can't breathe, I can't think, and I don't know what to do. I fall back onto my bed and sob, completely sob for what seems like forever. It's Edward who finds me and brings me into his arms and comforts me. I cry for hours, and I can't stop. The love of my life just left me, and my future plans have been picked up and thrown out the window.

I don't get out of bed for three days. I don't eat and I don't sleep, I go between crying and just staring at the wall. I don't hear anything from Harry. On the fourth day, Kimberly shows up and we talk, and I feel so much better, but I'm still upset, and I still can't eat. She threatens to admit me to a clinic if I don't start to eat. So, I do, reluctantly I eat, but I don't like it.

The months all blur into one, my cast is taken off and the breaks and bruises have all healed, leaving only my heart to go, I just don't see that ever happening though. I haven't spoken to Harry; I've been ignoring his calls. he hasn't come around either, and Drew and the boys don't mention him. I put my heart and soul into our relationship, and I can't help but feel worthless and tossed aside by Harry.

As unfair as I may be being, I trusted Harry to keep my heart safe and it feels like he just stood on it and kicked it away. Even if it wasn't on purpose, he didn't choose me. I was willing to uproot my life and change every plan I made for him, but he wasn't willing to do the same and that's ok. I'm glad I found out now that I wasn't worth it, rather than a few years down the track, when I would have been in even deeper.

Drew, Harry, and I eventually graduate, but I don't attend the ceremony. I can't see Harry again or any of my classmates for that matter or all the progress I've made in the last two months will suffer.

I cancel all my arrangements in London, I pull out of the apartment Harry, and I were going to share and settle for a dorm room on campus. I begin to realise that Harry is so much better off without me, I was just holding him back and that makes me able to accept the situation a whole lot better. Harry deserves better.

Harry's POV

It is absolutely killing me that I can't hold Louis in my arms, that he isn't by my side when I wake up and when I fall asleep. I miss him so much. I would have asked him to come with me if I thought it was the right thing for him, but I know it's not. I know he needs to be close to the boys an hour away rather than 24. I feel lost without Louis, but he won't answer my calls and Drew won't let me talk to him either. The boys were all upset when I told them the situation. They were so happy for me and told me how proud they were of me, but they were upset for Louis. Obviously worried about letting him go to Oxford alone. I'm worried too, but I know he will be ok, deep down I know he will thrive. I truly believe that we were dealt this hand for a reason and if we are meant to meet again, we will, and I will be forever holding on hope that that day will come.

Louis POV

On the night before Drew and I are set to leave for college, we all sit down for a big family dinner, our last for a while. It's amazing, as we talk about the past and when we were little, sharing memories and laughs and tears. I don't know what I'm going to do without these boys in my life every day.

"So, are you guys ready for tomorrow? Are you guys excited?" Andy asks Drew and me.

We are all curled up together on the couch in the theatre still talking and reminiscing.

"I'm so excited, I literally can't wait" Drew says.

"Lou?" Edward asks me.

"I am, but I'm scared" I say truthfully.

"What of buddy?" Andy asks.

I sigh.

"I'm scared that I'm going to be alone, that you guys won't be around every day, I'm going to miss you guys so much. I'm scared I'm going to relapse, no. I'm terrified I'm going to relapse and I'm just going to miss you so so much and.......I miss Harry. What if I can't do it?" I say my voice breaking.

"Louis, we are going to miss you so, much and it's going to be a challenge to be by yourself yes, but. You are going to be amazing. We really think this is just what you need. We are only an hour away too, remember that buddy, we are always, always here for you and I know Harry would be too" Scott says, squeezing me tightly in his arms.

"And what did Kimberly tell you kiddo?" Andy asks.

I take a deep breath.

"That I'm ready to do this and I'm going to do fantastic" I say smiling slightly.

"That's right kid, you're going to be fantastic" Edward tells me.

We all snuggle down together and just enjoy our last night all together. Things are changing and it's scary, but I know I will be ok.

As I head up to bed for my last night in my room. Drew hands me a note, It's from Harry. As I lay down for bed, I open the note, not sure if I want to reopen my broken heart, but I know it will always be broken without Harry, so I guess I have nothing to lose. As I open the letter a silver necklace falls out. Harry's paper plane necklace. I clutch it so tightly in my hand.

My Dear Lou,

Thank you for reading my letter, I'm writing this from the bottom of my heart Lou, and I mean every single word. You are amazing and truly are the love of my life. I can't stop thinking about you and it took so much will power to not walk off the plane and come running back to you. But I can't do that Louis and for that I am so sorry. You are one of the bravest and strongest people I know, and I will always love you, Louis. Please promise me you will go to Oxford and thrive and live and be amazing like I know you can be. You will always be in my heart Louis, and I will never, ever stop thinking of you. Please never forget me Lou, my necklace is yours please don't forget me.

I love you baby, forever and always

Your Harry.

I can't help but break again. The tears stream down my face. Harry doesn't love me, if he did, he would have stayed. He would have asked me to go with him, but he didn't, he doesn't want me, and it hurts. It hurts so much. I allow myself to shed tears over Harry for the last time, for the past and everything that has happened over the past year. As soon as I leave this house, I won't cry over those things again. I promise myself.

The next morning when I'm saying goodbye to the boys until Christmas and hugging them with all my might, I allow myself to cry.

"Lou, I'm so proud of you buddy, you have come so far, and I'm so excited to see you thrive" Andy says to me. I hug him tight.

"Lou, you have come such a long way over this past year, and you inspire me so much. I'm really going to miss you" Drew tells me. We share a huge hug and I cry harder.

"Kid, I love you so much and I know you are going to make us proud. Go get me kiddo" Edward says and I fall into his arms and breath him in.

"Louis, I'm so, so proud of you, you have no idea. I know you can do this; I know you will do fantastic things. You are ready for this Buddy; you are ready to live and have fun! I'm going to miss you bud, so much. I'm only a phone call away and we will come and visit as much as we can okay. You call me or any of us, whenever you need to. We will always drop everything for you. Now promise me" Scott says.

I rush into his arms and bury my face in his neck.

"I promise" I say choking on my words.

We all share one more group hug before we pull back wiping our eyes.

When they put me in the cab, tears in their eyes, I turn around and look out the back window as the car drives away and I shed my last few tears as I wave goodbye to my brothers and my old life.

I turn around to face the front and wipe my eyes. I need to find a way to be happy, this is a new beginning for me, something I've wanted for so long and I'm going to try and do my best to make the boys proud of me. I'm going to make someone of myself, and I know deep down I'm doing it for Harry too, that I will always need him and love him and will never ever forget him.

THE END