Chapter 21

 Nat's POV

 Bruce and I are lying awake together in bed with Tony sitting across from us. He doesn't want to be alone right now and that's perfectly understandable. The three of us end up drinking amongst ourselves and sharing our favorite stories about Steve. This is a coping mechanism to help us remember the good times rather than dwell on the fact that he's dead every second of every day. We tell stories about everything from our favorite meals together to our famous battles from over the years. The stories really do lighten the mood quite a bit.

   Eventually, Tony heads back to his room, but not before hugging us both and wishing us a good night, which is quite unlike Tony. We don't judge him for his actions because honestly both of us could use some extra affection. When he closes the door, I turn and face Bruce, kissing him gently on the lips before looking at him seriously. "So Bruce, how do you feel about having time off?" He sighs. "I like having some time off but it feels weird not to be saving the world from present dangers, even weirder not to be helping civilians that need our help."

   I nod in agreement. "That's how I feel too. Maybe we could organize our own team to help those in and around the city for starters. After that, we could branch our to other areas as well. I just can't cope with the fact that while we're sleeping comfortably in a bed in a secure location, so many people are lying in piles of rubble because that's all that's left of their homes." Bruce nods solemnly. "Can we just take one day to recover before diving into anything else?" "I'd love that." Bruce pulls me close to him and buries his face in my chest. His body shakes against mine and it doesn't take me long to realize that he's crying.

    My heart instantly breaks. Bruce hardly ever cries. He's been so strong lately for the both of us that I sometimes forget that he needs to let it all out too. I hold him while he cries, stroking his hair gently and holding him against him. When he's let it all out, he looks at me with red, puffy eyes for a moment before looking away. "I'm sorry you had to see that Nat." I look at him sincerely. "Bruce, you've been my rock. You're allowed to expression your emotions just as much as I am, even though I hate doing so too." Bruce laughs sadly. "You and I are the perfect pair Nat, you know with both of us being afraid to showcase negative emotions." "Yeah, that we are."

   We lie awake in each other's arms for a little while longer before finally dozing off for a few hours, only to be haunted by nightmares for the entire duration of time that we're asleep. I can't stop picturing Steve's pale, bloody, and lifeless body in my arms. I keep hearing his screams in my head over and over again as he faces Thanos head on. I wake up in a sweat as does Bruce, his skin having green blotches all over it. I stroke his arm gently in order to calm both of us down, especially him. Thankfully the skin to skin contact works and he's able to calm down enough to not have green on him anymore.

    Bruce looks at me with pure gratitude. "Thank you Nat, I don't know what I'd do with you." I stroke his cheek gently and he closes his eyes at my touch. "Let me guess, nightmares?" He snorts. "Yeah. Nightmares for you too?" I snort back and nod in agreement. "Bruce, do you ever think there will be a day where we won't constantly be plagued by nightmares?" He sighs. "I highly doubt it. Trouble seems to follow us no matter where we go. If we haven't accepted it by now, we'll never be able to cope with it." I sigh. "I know, there's just a small part of me that has that silly hope is all."

    We lie in bed for a few minutes before getting up to force ourselves to eat breakfast. Neither of us is hungry but we need a little bit of food in our stomachs in order to survive. We head into the kitchen and make ourselves some scrambled eggs and bacon for breakfast along with a nice pot of hot coffee. After eating a little bit of each, we take some pills to ease our slight hangovers, downing them with our coffee. The aftertaste isn't the best but it's better than not having any drink to take them down with. The two of us finish up breakfast and clean our plates before taking a shower together to freshen up. After that, we get dressed and get ready to face the beginning of a long reconstruction period in every which way.

Hoped that you guys liked this chapter! :) -Mary