A Few Days Later, Eloise's Baptism;

"Congratulations beautiful angel... grammie loves you so!" Jessica's grandma says as she holds Eloise in her big white dress.

Today Eloise was baptized. Jessica and Sam went back and fourth debating whether or not Eloise should be baptized. Religion was a big part of Jessica and Sam's life, but as they grew older they started to drift from the church and it's teachings. Sam and Jessica were afraid that their church wouldn't baptize Eloise because Sam and Jessica aren't married. Eventually, they decided to baptize Eloise in an Episcopal church. They liked the Episcopal church's teachings better.

They were proud of themselves as parents finding the right church that they'd want to raise their daughter in, even though it isn't a Catholic Church.

"She was so well behaved." Dorthy says to her mother

Everyone was dressed up for the occasion in their Sunday best. After the baptism Dorthy threw a little celebration at the house. They kept it small and it was just perfect.

"We have a pretty good baby." Sam says proudly

"I'm so happy for you two and doing this for the baby." Jane, Sam's mother says

Jessica gives them a soft smile then takes Eloise from her grandmother. "She's our sweet little girl." Jessica smiles

"Let me take a picture and of the cutest little family!" Ann says walking around with her camera

Jessica and Sam pose for the picture then Sam leaves a small kiss on Jessica's cheek.

Jessica and Sam picked Ann as the godmother and Sam's cousin John as The Godfather. Sam and Jessica handed Eloise off to them so they could get their pictures with her.

Sam pulled Jessica aside while they had a moment to themselves and gave her a long kiss.

"Sam, what was that for?" Jessica giggles as she pours herself an iced tea.

"I just wanted to say that I love you." He smiles

"I love you too." She says kissing him back

"Each day with Eloise makes it even more real that I am a father. It just blows my mind. And I feel so lucky, especially today. We've been through so much. Today just brings me a lot of joy. Things are all working out. All of our fears are out the window and I genuinely think we are the best parents ever." He says with passion

"Sam... that makes my heart ache..." Jessica smiles "I feel like we are doing pretty well ourselves."

//-//

July 15th;

Today everyone was working so it was just Jessica and Eloise. Days like this came around more often now. At first it was scary for Jessica to be alone with Eloise, but she slowly started gaining more confidence and felt really good when it was just her and the baby.

It was such a beautiful day, so Jessica decided to drive up to a park with Eloise and take a walk.

Jessica took her and Sam's car, since Sam's coworker picked him up early this morning. Driving with the baby was always extra scary, but they made it safely to the park.

Jessica took out the stroller and got Eloise situated for the park.

"Look honey, do you see the pretty lake?" Jessica says as she walks through the park "oh wait, you're facing me..." Jessica laughs

Eloise sat in the stroller and was at such peace. Her eyes were moving all over as she was trying to look at all the birds flying in the sky and the pretty trees.

"You like the park? Don't you?" Jessica giggles

Jessica walks around the lake taking in this moment to herself and appreciating everything around her. Jessica had began losing touch of herself. Her life had changed drastically in the last few months which made her forget who she was and made her push aside all of her feelings. It was moments like this that made her feel happy yet sad. She never had time to really adjust to her new normal. The moment she found out she was pregnant she had to grow up in a second.

She decides to sit down on a bench and push the stroller back and forth slowly as Eloise began to grow tired.

Jessica let's out a deep sigh and just closes her eyes for a bit. She suddenly felt an immense amount of panic. It came out of no where. All she wanted to do was cry... she didn't know why. It was such a beautiful day and she was with her baby. But now, being alone with all of these thoughts made her mood go from ten to zero very fast.

You're okay Jessica... this is normal. You're just tired. You're a new mom, it's okay to feel tired and sad. Right? But what is this that I'm feeling? Why do I all of a sudden feel so lonely and sad? I shouldn't be sad. My life is going great. My baby is healthy, Sam is healthy, I'm healthy. Wasn't this what I had been waiting for? For everything to fall into place and be perfect. Why does nothing feel perfect anymore.

Then, Jessica went on to think about her father. With her mother proceeding with divorce, nothing felt right.

I have so much peace in my life without my dad. He was always angry and never understood. He never supported Ann... he never supported me. How can my father that I used to be so close with do that to me? Just leave me in the dust? And mom... she sacrificed everything for me and Ann. She left the "love of her life" for us. I feel like I owe her more. But deep down this isn't what I want for my parents.

Jessica opened up her eyes and suddenly couldn't breathe. She felt so overwhelmed and scared. Her hands trembled, her body was shaking, and she couldn't cry for help.

As Jessica's panic attack started to really hit, she looked at her baby who was sleeping peacefully as her mother was experiencing something that has never happened to her before.

"Someone please help me..." she whispers to herself as she holds her chest.

Then, Eloise wakes up from a loud truck leaving the park. She was so startled that she started screaming.

"Shhhh..." Jessica says as tears roll from her face

Jessica didn't know what to do. All of a sudden she froze. She couldn't feel her body. She sat on the park bench shaking, scared to death.

Then, a lady comes up to Jessica.

"Ma'am? Are you okay?" The lady asks

Jessica looks at her with tears in her eyes and doesn't make any sudden movements.

"Do you need help? Is everything okay?" She asks again

Jessica finally snaps out of it and begins to feel everything again.

"I-" she struggles to say

"It's okay... is there someone I should call?"

"I don't know what's happening to me." Jessica cries

//-//

Twenty minutes later, before Jessica could even blink, Sam was all of a sudden sitting right next to her comforting her as the lady tried to soothe the baby.

"Jessie, honey? What's going on?" Sam panics

The lady that found Jessica had taken her phone to call Sam, per Jessica's request. When Sam got the call he had his coworker drive to the park as fast as possible. She described Jessica's state to Sam as being "distressed" and "not very verbal".

"Sam..." she cries

"I'm here... let's get you back home or to a doctor." He says taking her hand

"No... I can't move." She yells

Sam looks at the lady then back at Jessica.

"What happened?" He asks

"I was just walking.... with the baby. I remember sitting down, closing my eyes, then I started to feel..." then she blanks as she tries to stop the tears

"I think she may be having a panic attack." The lady says to Sam

"What did you start to feel?" He asks

"Alone... scared.... my body just... it froze. It froze and the baby started crying and I couldn't do anything. I couldn't move." She sobs "I'm a terrible mother. I should have never left home." She cries even harder

"Don't think like that. It's okay... I'm here now, you're safe. You're not alone and there's no reason to be scared." He says

Without saying anything Jessica falls into Sam's arms and cries. He could feel her body shake. She was cold and tense.

Without Jessica knowing, Sam had called an ambulance hoping that they'd be able to help Jessica.

When Jessica picks her head up from Sam's shoulder she sees two men walking towards her with medical equipment.

"What are they doing here?" She says

"Relax, it's okay... they are here to help." Sam says

"I don't need help, I just have to go home!" She cries

"Jess, this lady said you were dissociating... Jessica you're not well."

"Please Sam... no.... please."

//-//