B R E N

"Is there a reason why you're ignoring me right now?"

I'd noticed Madie walking in my direction, but I hadn't expected that to come out of her mouth.

Her fucking mouth.

It was the perfect shade of peach, and she kept biting her lip, plumping it up just like the goddamn fruit.

This was exactly why I was ignoring her. I was already a little drunk, and now she was so close to me that I could smell her flowery perfume. How could I pretend I wasn't attracted to her when my defenses were lowered, absorbed by hazy music and a few bottles of craft beer, courtesy of Beau?

But I tried. I took a deep breath, lowered my gaze to hers, and told her the only honest thing I could.

"Look, Madie, you seem really nice. I'd like to be friends with you."

Well, maybe it wasn't completely honest.

She tilted her head to the side adorably. Madie had stormed over here with fire in her eyes, but that hard gaze was already softening. I wouldn't let myself look at that mouth of hers, but her eyes told me she was smiling a little. She was just too goddamn nice.

"But I don't want trouble with your boyfriend," I muttered and took another swig of my beer, letting it wash away the taste of those words.

The brightness in her gaze dimmed again. "I'm just being friendly," she protested, and I knew that somehow I had hurt her feelings. "It isn't like that..." she trailed off, looking away awkwardly.

As if I needed a reminder that it wasn't fucking like that.

I sighed. "I know, Madie. But I don't think you've seen how Quinton glares at me when you say hi."

She frowned but didn't argue. "Right," she said. "No, I get it. Sorry." With a tight nod, she spun around, taking one step away.

Then it was two steps away... and three steps away.

A guilty feeling settled in my stomach. She'd done nothing wrong. Madie Lenertz was likely completely innocent in everything she did. She'd gone out of her way to make me smile on more than one occasion, and now I was the reason she was walking away with a frown.

It wasn't her fault that Quinton was controlling.

"Shit," I muttered. Running a hand through my hair, I called out to her. "Madie, wait."

She whirled around, her softly curled hair flying over her shoulder as she did. Staring at me with eyes like saucers, she hesitated mid-step. 

I tried to talk, but words failed me as I let myself really take in the sight of her for the first time that night. Madie had this effortless kind of beauty that was a rarity. It wasn't the kind that Shakespeare wrote sonnets about, or men launched ships for or any of that crap. No, it was a soulful beauty that hit you, like the perfect song on a clear day. She didn't just look good. She made people feel good.

Wearing cuffed overalls, a striped crop top, and sandals, it was like she was plucked out of a field of sunflowers on a summer's eve and dropped into this crappy college party.

She didn't fit in here. I didn't fit in here, either, but it wasn't in the same way.

"I...I'm sorry," I finally managed to get out. "I wasn't trying to be a dick."

She shrugged, taking a step back in my direction. "You don't need to apologize. I'm sorry if Quinton made you uncomfortable." Clearing her throat, she glanced at her feet and grimaced at the sticky floors. "He's just a little overprotective," she muttered.

"Yeah." I shifted on my feet. "But you're here without him?" 

It was a question I already knew the answer to. I was sure if he were here, I would know by now. Maybe it was possible that he wasn't as overbearing as I'd thought if she came here without him.

Madie nodded. "Yeah, having a girl's night with my roommate. Some guy named Beau invited her, and she dragged me along." 

A little smile slipped onto her lips.

I couldn't help but laugh. The irony of the situation wasn't lost on me; Beau warned me away from Madie, and yet she was only here because of him.

"That guy named Beau is my roommate," I said dryly, lifting my bottle in his direction, pointing him out.

"I heard." She chuckled and tucked a gingery tendril behind her ear, exposing a little hoop earring.

"How's chemistry going?" I asked, trying to find a safe topic.

Madie took another step back in my direction as she rolled her eyes and sipped from the cup in her hand.

I grinned. "That good, huh?"

"I suppose it's going a little better," she confessed, smiling over the rim of her mixed drink.

"Like you got three problems right on the last assignment instead of two?" I teased.

She laughed, and it rang above the house music that Beau was currently DJ-ing. "I'll have you know that I got eight problems right on my last quiz," Madie countered.

"Oh yeah?" I readjusted myself, leaning my other shoulder on the door behind me. "Out of how many points?"

Her eyes grew wide, and she mumbled into her cup. But I could tell she was still grinning to herself. The ease that Madie talked about her grades with was refreshing. I always tried to hide my failures, even though I wasn't very good at it. No surprise there. I wasn't very good at anything—except maybe making this girl laugh.

"What was that? I couldn't hear you." I lifted my hand to cup my ear, flashing a cheeky grin.

Madie swatted my arm playfully, her earlier annoyance gone. "I said fifteen points, okay?"

I threw my hands up in mock defense. "Okay, okay." Smiling, I added, "Look, I have a statistics assignment due tomorrow, and I'm sure I won't do any better on it than that."

With a sigh, Madie flipped around, leaning her back against the opposite side of the door frame. Our shoulders nearly touched, and I twisted my head to look at her profile as she took a tiny sip of her drink.

But Madie stared ahead, seemingly looking at nothing. "I'm going to be honest," she said. "I'm not used to trying this hard at getting good grades."

Turning my own head so that I faced forward again, I saw what Madie was looking at.

Our reflection stared back at us from a dingy, smudged window across the room. Leaning against this weathered wood, we almost looked as worn as our surroundings. At that moment, we were just two kids trying to survive as adults for the first time. I sought Madie's eyes in the reflection.

"I'm going to be honest. I don't know what it's like not to try hard."

She nodded quietly. In the window, I saw the smallest smile tug at the corner of her lips.

Then her eyes flicked down, and she pulled out a ringing phone from her pocket. Glancing over, I saw Quinton's face plastered to the screen. Madie answered it quickly. I tried not to listen, but she breathed the word yeah like five times in a row before finally ending by saying, "Okay, babe. See you soon."

Sliding the phone back in her pocket, Madie peered over at me. "I gotta go. Quinton wants me to meet him back at the dorms. See you later, Bren." 

She smiled and then was gone so fast that I didn't even have a chance to form a reply.

It was probably for the best. I glanced back up at the window, seeing my own reflection standing there alone. Shaking my head, I turned my body and looked back out at the party instead. I stood there for a while, drinking and trying not to think about anything at all.

"Hey!"

A girl with long, dark hair and bright hazel eyes—possibly even brighter than Madie's—stared at me. She was pretty in that spunky sort of way.

"Hey."

"Where did Madie go?" The girl looked away, searching the crowd.

"Who are you?"

"Nessa," she replied without looking at me.

"Nessa?" This didn't really help me.

She finally turned toward me and sighed. "Madie's roommate."

"Oh," I said. Well, that made sense. "She left a little bit ago. Her boyfriend called her."

"Ah," Nessa replied. "Great."

Her shoulders slumped, and I could tell she didn't really think it was great. "Everyone I know has suddenly disappeared," she complained.

"Same," I muttered. I didn't see Beau anywhere.

She squinted at me as if actually looking at my face for the first time. "You're Beau's roommate. Bren, right?"

I nodded.

"And you're friends with Madie?" she asked.

"You could say that." I covered my wry smile with my bottle of beer, wrapping my lips around the glass and letting the alcohol drown out any other thoughts on the matter.

Nessa flicked her eyes over me, assessing something—I wasn't sure what. But there was an undeniable spark in the way she did it, a quirk in her lips as she thought.

"Wanna head back to the dorms?" she finally said. The assessment must have come back in my favor.

I nodded again. There was no reason for me to stick around here anymore. I would just send Beau a text, letting him know that I was heading to our room.

Nessa chatted about this and that as we cut back across the dark streets. As I looked down the shadowed avenues, my mind wandered to Madie. I should have walked back with her so she wasn't alone. I pulled out my phone, sending a message to ask if she'd made it to see Quinton safely.

Nessa and I walked into the lights of campus, and her face was a little clearer as she told me about her annoying little brother. I wasn't sure how we landed on that topic, but it made me wish, not for the first time, that I had siblings of my own.

She was funny, and I became so engrossed in listening to her that I didn't realize where I was even walking. I'd followed her all the way back to her room, and now her hand fiddled with the door handle.

Dark eyes looked up at me beneath equally dark eyelashes. "Coming in?"

The door opened. Whether from my intoxication or exhaustion, I wasn't sure, but everything seemed to move slowly. Nessa took a step inside the room, sinking into the darkness. I didn't say anything, but my feet followed her.

And then the door closed, and Nessa's warm lips crashed against mine.

🖤
Thanks for reading chapter six of It Burns Within Us!
Xoxo