"Love is more than a noun – it is a verb; it is more than a feeling – it is caring, sharing, helping, sacrificing." – William Arthur Ward
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Chapter 33
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Maggie

I was still a deer caught in headlights.

"I'll give you five seconds, before I find my own way in," Luke threatened, his voice barely holding onto what little patience he did have. "Pick one."

I heard his counting, but my legs remained still. If I opened the window, he'd see everything. If I didn't, then he'd surely live up to his word, and see everything, anyway.

It was a losing battle.

I caught glimpses of my neck in the mirror as I passed it. It was just as bad as I thought, the skin already bruised and blue. The man's handprint remained there as well.

Sucking in a breath, I slowed my steps in front of the window, and pulled the curtain away. Luke was standing there, sporting his casual scowl.

With a sigh, I opened the window just enough to let him in.

I jerked around as quick as I could, my hand finding the clip in my hair to let it fall to my shoulders. My cut was short, so it did little to cover the marks along my neck, but it was better than nothing.

"What are you doing here?" I asked, quietly.

I heard his feet land on the floor, then the window get shut behind him. "I wasn't letting you ditch me on a movie night."

"I wasn't ditching you," I mumbled, concentrating on my bag. I didn't have enough time to hide it, so I needed to add another lie to the list.

"Yeah, well you didn't answer my call. You let it ring even though I know you saw it," he acknowledged, voice agitated. "And, your texts. They were weird as shit."

I swung my head down, embracing the strands that hit my face.

Leave. Please leave, Luke. "How so?"

"They were all short and choppy." I heard him come to my side. "You wouldn't have said something as simple as that. You would have texted me all of the details, as gory and disgusting as they would be, and...and..." His voice fell until it stopped altogether.

I could feel his eyes burning into the side of my face. "Hey," he called out. "Why aren't you looking at me?"

I tried to cough up an explanation, but it wasn't possible. My throat ached, and the longer he stared at me, the more the pain multiplied, but not in the same sense.

"I'm sick," I forced out in a squeak. "You're going to make fun of my pink eye. I—"

"Bullshit. I don't believe you."

I squeezed my eyes shut, willing the past hour, hell, the past nineteen years, away. "And, I don't care."

"Look in my eyes," he demanded, his voice hardening. "I'm not being funny, Maggie. Look at me, right now."

I shook my head this time, preparing to turn my back to him. "I'm—"

Swiftly, Luke placed a hand around my waist, looped his fingers into the loop of my jeans, and tugged me to him. I had no other choice but to stumble to him.

One hand remained on my waist to keep me still. The other pushed past the hair that I'd used as a diversion. A single finger balanced under my chin to tip it up to him, his eyes running me over until finally, they locked on my neck.

His expression went stone cold as his fingers lightly grazed the skin. I couldn't stop myself from flinching, which he caught. His eyes flickered up to mine, and his hand fell to his side, already tightened into a fist.

A moment of silence passed, one that made my skin crawl with the unknown the longer it continued on.

His eyes squeezed shut as he pulled in a long string of air through his nose. When he released it, his eyes opened. I nearly jerked back out of fear at the murderous gaze brewing under the waves of blue.

His jaw hardened, the muscle ticking. "Maggie," he said, willing his voice to remain still. "I'm going to ask you this one time."

I shook my head, my gaze falling to the ground. "Don't, Luke. Just—"

"Who did this to you?" the drop in his tone sent shivers up my spine until a shudder ran along the skirts of my skin. "Who fucking hurt you, Maggie?"

I tried to turn from his harsh glare, but he had me before I could go anywhere. A hand trapped my wrist in it, the front of his body pressing into mine so that I had no other choice but to sit back on the bed, with him still standing over me.

His entire demeanor had grown so dark, it was frightening to witness. Out of all of the times I'd seen him angry, I knew it had nothing on this. Not even by a single thread.

He was waiting for an answer, one that he wouldn't receive. Not from me, anyway.

I didn't even realize how badly his body was trembling until I peered back at him. His chest shook from under the weight of a breath, but it remained that way even after he blew it out.

His eyes narrowed at me, his nostrils flaring with rage at my silence. "Answer me, Maggie. Answer me before I burn this fucking town to the ground."

I moved my eyes back to the suitcase. "II can't tell you that."

"Bullshit you can't fucking tell me," he snapped, dropping to his knees in front of me. His hand purposely skipped over the bruises, instead attaching to my chin to force my attention to him. "Give me a fucking name, Norris. That's all I need."

Even if I decided to, there wasn't a name to give. Everything was overlapping so terribly. "I can't—"

"Fine," he hissed, his hand leaving my chin, and going to my jaw. "Whoever did this, whoever decided to make the biggest mistake of their fucking life by touching you, I'll kill the fucker myself."

I realized a couple things over the course of our last couple months together. Luke knew everything that happened in this town, and if he didn't, then he'd find out.

Which meant that he would get his answers, but not from me.

I shot up, nearly knocking him over. "No."

Luke raised himself to my level. "What the fuck do you mean no?" Even without saying it, I knew he was willing himself to not look back to my neck, again.

"I mean no. I'm fine, okay? So—"

"You're fine? Are you shitting me?" he hissed back at me, his eyes jumping between my throat and my eyes. Every time they went to my neck, I feared he'd set true to his threat of setting fire to the city. "Someone fucking choked you out. A grown ass man put their goddamned hands on you, and you expect me not to cut them off in return?"

I needed to get him away from me. I needed to make him want to leave. It was the only way.

"Yes," I argued, my voice thickening over. "I expect you to mind your own business, and let me handle my own shit, okay?"

I jerked around to avoid his harsh glare, but with it burning into my back, I remained just as exposed.

"So just...leave, okay? Leave," I said, coldly. "I don't want you here, or anywhere near me. Get the fuck out, and don't come back."

I dreamed, even rehearsed, of saying those words to him a million times over, but these circumstances weren't involved. Not in the slightest. Now that they were, I thought my whole body split in half the moment I threw them into the open.

Because, I didn't want him to leave. I didn't want to not see his building, or argue with him, or get carried by him. I didn't want to stop hearing his laughs, or seeing his contact on my screen, or our conversations that I only trusted myself to have with him, or the movie nights. I didn't want to lose him.

I didn't want to be alone.

"You want me to leave?" his voice had fallen as well, and if I strained my voice just enough, I would have noted the hurt in it. "To be respectful. To go home and forget this shit? Is that what you want?"

I never got what I wanted, though. That didn't change now.

I nodded once. "I do."

I heard his steps from behind me, but they weren't going away. They were coming closer.

"Well, tough fucking shit, Norris," he argued back. "I'm an asshole for a reason."

Other than the floods of relief, I was also overwhelmed with anguish.

My head slumped. "Luke, please—"

"Why are you packing?" he disregarded, his hands coming down on the suitcase. "Stop it."

I tried to yank it back, but he maintained a tight grip. "I'm leaving."

"No, you're not."

"I am," I argued. "Now, get out so that I can finish." And, so that I don't find a good enough reason to stay.

Luke yanked at the bag, fully pulling it from my grasp. Without so much of a crack in his face, he dumped the suitcase, as well as all of its contents all over the floor.

With a grim line of a smile, he set it back down. "No, the fuck you're not. You're staying your ass right here."

"Luke." My eyes widened at some of the spilled clothes, before they jerked back up to him. "I know that you're used to controlling everything, but you can't. Not with this, and not with me. I need to leave."

"You don't need to do shit," he argued at me, kicking the suitcase over this time. "I'm not letting you run from the shit you have here. No way. No fucking way."

I sucked in a breath at the reminder, my heart swelling in my chest. I shoved it right back down, daring myself to try and reason with the most stubborn man I'd ever met.

"I know that I haven't finished the shop, yet, okay?" I rushed out. "But, I'll find a way—"

His dark eyes went wide for a moment, the disbelief in them bare. "Are you...are you serious?"

"I'll send money to cover the costs—"

"Maggie—"

"It'll take a while, but I'll make sure to get it all to you, okay? I know it won't be the same, but—"

In a matter of seconds, he was standing in front of me, again, his eyes ablaze with rage. "It's not about a fucking building, or your debt, okay?" he snapped at me. "It's about you trying to run, and it's about you..." His lips clamped shut, his gaze falling to our feet.

They remained there as his voice trembled over his statement, "It's about you leaving and me being fucked up at the thought of it. It's about you trying to leave me, and me wanting every fucking thing except that. Anything but that."

My face went slack at his confession, and the intensity in the statement alone. And, how much I agreed with it.

He would miss me just as much as I'd miss him. It wasn't about the debt, or the building. It was about him thinking that he was a part of the reason I was running away.

It wasn't true, not in the slightest. If anything, I think, in a different universe where my father didn't exist...Luke would be the first reason I ever stayed.

He was watching me for a reaction, his eyes searching over mine frantically. His throat bobbed before his trembling lips parted, "And, I'm not letting you. I'm not letting you leave me alone. I'm not letting you fuck with me all this time and leave like nothing happened. You can't. You just...you can't." By the end of his words, his voice had fallen into more of a plea than anything.

His hand curled just below my jawline, cradling me in under the shaky skin. He was shaking his head, his expression full with determination.

"And..." he started, his words falling with breathlessness. "I know I'm not good. I know that I'm selfish, and rude and an ass and every other thing you've called me over the years. I know that you may be bored of me. I know that I'm a piece of shit, and that I come with more baggage than I'm worth, and that I'm not worth shit else. I know I'm not worth anyone's time. I know that. And, I'm sorry about it, okay? I promise I am. But, I've been trying to be better. I've been trying to unlearn all of that shit, but I'll try harder, okay?"

The usual hardness he sported was nowhere to be found. In place of it, was one of pure, bare desperation. Panic. Forlornness.

"I'll try harder, Maggie," his weak voice forced out. "I will. I promise I will."

His head fell, and his tone went with it. "Just...please don't leave me." His hand went lazy on my jaw, his eyes raising to mine with a panic I'd never even thought him capable of. "Please don't go. Please."

My tears had broken past the dam, now, running down my cheeks. Luke kept his eyes trained on mine, but I was pretty sure that he was holding his breath for my response.

I knew the one that I should give. The one I had prepared for everyone the moment I stepped foot into this town. The one I'd been so ready to give an hour ago.

I couldn't give it.

I wanted to stay. For once, I didn't want to pack up and run from the very thing that had ripped away my ability to fly.

I wanted to keep Jax and granny. Kimberly and Raven. I wanted to keep Luke. I wanted to know the secret hideouts of the town, the best diners and hangouts. I wanted to breathe. I wanted to live.

I deserved to live.

To do that, though, I'd have to fight. It was time to stop using the flight stage. I'd have to find my own version of strength, not the one I'd faked all this time.

I'd do it, or I'd die trying.

I raised my eyes from the carpet, and back to Luke, whose skin had grown sickly pale from my pause.

"I'm not leaving you," I whispered. "I'm not leaving anyone."

His chest fell, and he squeezed his eyes shut for a moment, willing in a rocky breath. When he opened them, there was a newfound relief, but traces of rage still remained, as well.

I dared myself to find the strength to carry on. I had nothing left to lose other than myself, right now, so if I wanted the best chance to keep it that way, I'd have to do something I'd rarely ever done.

Tell the truth.

I backed up until the back of my knees hit the bed, again. Luke followed, sitting in front of me. My breath was stolen when he reached forward, dragging my hand to his by my middle finger.

It tightened. "Talk to me, Maggie," he begged, his voice so soft, it nearly rocked me to sleep. "Please talk to me."

I dug my elbow into my knee, planting my head on top. It was the only position that wouldn't show how shaky I was. My insides were causing all types of stirs and conflict, completely aware, and even in aid of everything that was occurring outside of it.

I cast a stare down to my sheets. "You may not like what you hear."

He didn't hesitate, shaking our hands. "Nothing could make me dislike you as much as I already do. Try me, angel."

I cast my glance to him, and he caught it, immediately. His own held no judgement, no doubt or assumptions. It helped press my insecurities down enough to let the truth squeeze through.

I released a sigh, the sound nearly ripping my throat in two. "Do you promise not to judge?" So many people had before, I knew better to assume that everyone else didn't.

"You kidding me?" he said with disbelief, his finger rubbing at mine. "You literally saw my dad beat my ass. I'm the last person to judge."

Here goes everything.

"My parents," I said, quietly. "I told you they were terrible people, but I didn't tell you...my dad." Come on, Maggie. "He and my mom. They're in prison."

That was the best I could muster. I couldn't even get the words out in their entire true form, but this was a version of the truth. A minor version, really.

If I told him the entire thing, I wasn't sure if I could draw back in time to hold what little control I did still have, in tact.

Luke nodded once, his attentive gaze still lingering across mine. I knew that he was trying to uncover the rest, but refrained from seeking through his curiosity. I was more than grateful of it.

"When I snapped on you that day at the shop," I continued, my eyes falling to the spot his thumb was stroking. "My lawyer. He had called to tell me that my dad was scheduled to get out of prison in April."

"And, he has unfinished business with me," I added, slowly. "I figured that he'd send his friends to do his dirty work until he was able to get to me himself, but I never expected it to come so soon."

Luke directed his glare to my headboard, the rage in his eyes blaring with ferocity. "Your brother know?"

"I didn't want to fuck with his life anymore than I already have—"

"You're not fucking up lives by asking for help, Maggie."

"No, you don't understand, Luke. All of my life, I've been the reason he's been pulled away from so many schools, so many opportunities, and new friends." The shame in my heart made it heavier. "Me, okay? He's never said it aloud, but I couldn't blame him if he did resent me. I hate myself for ruining his and granny's life the way I did."

My vision blurred at the afterthought. Granny. What would she say right now if she knew I hadn't done the very thing she preached about from the beginning: be yourself.

That was it, though. I didn't know myself. I didn't know if she even existed. I didn't know if I ever really existed, or if I'd gone to that dark, dark room, again. I didn't know.

"Come on," I heard Luke intrude on my thoughts. "Get up and pack. You're coming with me."

I blinked until my vision was clear. "What?" He was already up, my suitcase in his hands. "Why?"

He craned his body to grab everything that he had thrown out already. With his lips set in a determined line, he responded, "You're staying with me now, that's why."

My eyes went wide with disbelief. "What? No, I'm not—"

"You are. Pack what you need."

"No," I shook my head, standing up on shaky legs. "No, Luke. You don't get to decide things like that. This is my life, and my shit."

His hand slammed the suitcase down, his angry gaze slicing right through me. "I don't care about your little independent livelihood shit, right now, Maggie. I don't care about you hating me, or you wanting to fight on your own, I don't care, okay?" He shoved a hand down his face, the frustration evident. "You're in danger, Maggie. Do you really think I'm going to let—"

"I don't need your help," I argued with him. "I don't need anyone, okay? So just—"

His voice rose over,"I don't give a fuck about you wanting to do this shit alone," he snapped over me. "You're not alone, and you're not in this shit by yourself. Not while I'm here. And, I am." His eyes narrowed over at me, cutting down any type of argument from my stem before they could even grow. "Whether you like it or not, I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere. Not in a million fucking years, you hear me?"

I didn't like the idea, not in the slightest. Even if he claimed it to be for a different reason, people weren't nice for no reason. There was always a give and take, but I couldn't afford it.

I had nothing to give.

At my uncertain turned expression, Luke's frustration fell into desperation. His long legs reached my lone figure in a matter of seconds.

"Listen to me," he said in a soft tone. "This isn't about shit else, expect you, Maggie. Let it be. Be selfish, and think of yourself first. Let someone else take the shit for once, or at least..." His tongue darted out to swipe at his lip as he considered the next set of words that would come from them, "Or, at least let someone else share it with you."

"Luke." The walls that I had crafted brick by brick, so carefully...they were crumbling. "You don't understand. They'll come after you, too."

"And, I'll have the time of my life killing every single one of them," he responded with no hesitation. "I'm trained, you know that. I've been fighting for nearly a decade, Maggie. I've been using guns and knives for longer. They won't even get close to touching you."

I shook my head, again. "I can't ask you to do that for me." The thought of protection did seem pleasing, more than that actually, but this wasn't just some stalker ex or a random killer.

This was a father who wanted to bathe in his daughter's blood.

"You're not, because you're not asking me to," he returned. "You won't have to pay bills, or any shit like that. You'll get your own room. I'll move some shit around, so that you can have your own space. I'll do anything to make sure that you're comfortable. That you're safe."

I raised my eyes at this, needing to see the truth for myself. I expected humor, or mischief, or something but there was none. Only earnestness.

He was serious about this.

And, I was pretty sure I was believing it.

Other than the regular videos of Kade, Levi, and Luke fighting, I'd seen Kade professionally fight, and heard rumors that Luke was on the same level, if not even better. They'd all been apart of underground fighting for so long, it was still embedded within them, no matter how much time passed.

If that were the case, I knew I'd need it in order to give myself the best shot possible. Pepper spray wouldn't help me, right now. Not if I was caught off guard the way I was on that road, in my car. I didn't want it to be my work, or my home or school, next. I needed help.

Lukes' hands were on my arms, now, lightly running up and down. I cast a glance at them, the warmth buzzing through my body the longer it continued.

I focused on my uncertainty before that. "Why are you doing this?"

Luke pressed his lips together, his eyes jumping to the carpet. His jaw went hard, the muscle ticking from the clench alone. He shook his head once before I heard him mutter, "It doesn't matter."

I wanted to dive deeper than that, but I couldn't find the ambition, the energy. I was exhausted in every way and form. I couldn't handle much more.

"I'll stay," I relented. "Only for a week. We'll see how it goes after that."

That was the best I could offer, right now. I couldn't trust myself to follow through with my promise to stay, but I also couldn't betray myself by saying no. I deserved to make it out.

"A week?" Luke repeated, eyes nearly falling from their sockets. "Fuck that. As long as those fuckers are alive, you're staying with me."

I shoved out a sigh. "A week is the best you'll get. I still have to think about Jax and..." My words fell into a quiet void before I finished with, "We'll see from there, okay?"

"I won't be seeing shit except you in my house."

I didn't know how everything would go. Luke and I had just renounced bloody hatred for one another no longer than three weeks ago, and now, here we were. Becoming temporary roommates.

"I'll continue to work on the shop, and your car," I said, swiping at my eyes with the back of my hand. They were heavy from the crying. "As payment, of course."

Luke drew back as if I had slapped him. "I don't want anything—"

"I don't care. I want things to remain as normal as possible between us, and this is how. We both know I still have a debt, that you'd push me off a cliff and I'd do the same so...let it stay that way. Let it all stay the same. Please."

It was embarrassing enough that I needed his help. I didn't want to, nor did I plan to ask for much else. I just wanted things to remain as normal as possible, despite it not actually being that way.

Luke studied me over, his head tilting in concentration. Finally, I saw his shoulders fall.

With a calculated expression, he said, "Hey, Norris."

I looked to him.

He flicked his head toward the ceiling. "Look up for me."

I did.

"My bad, brat. I meant down."

I did that, too, but found nothing out of the ordinary.

"See it, yet?" a small smile crossed his lips, and it was then that I got it.

I sniffled, attempting a chuckle. "See what, you idiot?"

His smile folded into a grin. "How much I still hate you."

I shot an appreciative smile his way as it drifted toward my relief. He was the same. We were the same.

It sounded insane out loud, but in my head, it made all the sense in the world. I didn't want his pity, or his charity more than I already had it. I didn't want him to see me a different way every time he saw or spoke to me. I wanted normal.

Luke let his hands fall from me, then crossed his arms, rocking back on his heels at me. His eyes went anywhere else, but my throat. "We'll talk about everything once we've got you home."

I nearly did a double-take at that. I never thought I'd hear 'we' and 'home' in the same sentence, especially from Luke. Despite everything, though, for the first time tonight...I felt that crippling wave of fear slowly start to fade the longer he was here.

Luke helped me pack, our silence building the longer we continued to do so. I could feel him wanting to speak, but holding back for my sake.

I broke through the barrier with, "I honestly have no idea what to tell Jax."

"You're nineteen years old. You can go anywhere."

I cocked a brow at him. "I can tell you've never had an actual sibling before."

He cast me a sideways glance. "What do you mean?"

I rolled my eyes, giving a chuckle. "Jax called the cops once, because I fell asleep and forgot to text him that I was home from an exam. His job had to call the ambulance for him, because he had a panic attack at the thought of me being dead in a ditch."

The memory brought so much peace, despite its chaotic period. Peace that I wouldn't have to leave it behind, and that I still had a chance to make even more.

Luke's mouth twitched as he zipped my bag up. "That's fucking crazy."

I nodded in agreement, not even bothering to fight the flutter of relief that I wouldn't have to forget it. Him.

"So is he," I confirmed with a small smile.

"That shit must suck," he muttered around a chuckle, shaking his head.

"What do you mean?"

He returned my glance with a look of confusion, before shrugging with another chuckle. "I couldn't imagine having family that care about me like that," he elaborated. "It must suck."

I paused on my shirts, my attention leaving the suitcase, and going to him. "I mean, it gets annoying at times, but it doesn't suck."

Luke shrugged. "If you say so."

My hand was on the move before I could stop it. Instead of a single finger, I grabbed his whole hand in mine, catching the both of us by surprise.

Luke's' eyes closed in on the spot, and my own followed up just to ensure that the warmth that soon swept through my bloodstream was simply my nerves alone.

By the time I caught up to the situation, I realized that he was assessing me over, as well.

I cleared my throat, managing a smile. "You have me now, and I care," I told him. "Maybe a little too much, at times. So..." I shrugged, trying to build my humor back into place. "Don't expect a normal welcome home party from me if you come home at three in the morning. Easiest consequence you'll get is a boxing match, okay?"

I meant it as a joke, but it was sincere. He had been alone for so long, now, that I think he couldn't even recognize care and trust for what it was. I had a lot for him, more than either of us ever expected. I didn't think it was going away anytime soon. I knew it wasn't.

His eyes ran along the length of my arm, falling to our hands. His thumb swept over the back before he nodded, an understanding smile building. "Okay."

***

Luke stepped in front of me to flip the light switch on, before I could get a glimpse of the darkness. He had me wait a few minutes, too, for some reason.

"This will be your room," he informed me.

I held my backpack close to my chest as I took a step inside of the room.

Jesus. The simplicity of it even screamed rich.

The room's walls gleamed in a pristine milky-white hue, resembling a canvas awaiting artistry. Underfoot, the floors showcased a mesmerizing dance of white and grey swirls, reminiscent of slick, marble-tile elegance, their surface catching the light in a subtle, glinting display. At the heart of the space stood a regal king-sized bed, and directly across, a high-mounted flat screen was on the wall, with a cozy fireplace nestled beneath it.

On one side, a vast dresser extended almost the entire length of the wall, serving as both storage and a visual centerpiece. In a corner nearby was a pristine white chaise modern sofa, as if freshly unboxed. To the room's opposite side, a lengthy, white sofa, adorned with a couple of snug blankets, rested against the wall, inviting comfort and conversation. Adjacent, a smaller dresser, nestled beside the bathroom, offered its own charm and utility.

"It's not the best, but it's the only one with a light, right now." Luke stepped so close to my backside, I felt it grow hot. "I'm gonna run into town for some more bulbs to give the other rooms light tomorrow, too."

The thought hit, then.

I turned to face him.. "Are you okay with it?"

His head tilted. "With what?"

"Me...you know." I jerked around, my skin going red. The past twenty-four hours were surely testing me. "Leaving the light on. I don't want to run up your bill. I forgot my light, though, so if you have a candle or something, that could—"

Luke shook his head at me, his lips in a scowl. "Fuck that. The lights stay on all you want."

Despite my nerves, I passed off a smile. "Thank you."

I turned back around, dropping the backpack at the corner of the bed. Well, my bed, now. I blew out a sigh that was such a mix between relief and fear, I wasn't sure which one was taking the run home. "I really appreciate it, this, Luke. Seriously."

He nodded, studying me over for something. He stepped forward until his large frame filled the space of the door, leaning against one side. He crossed both his ankles, and his arms, still assessing me over.

I tried to get something out of the tension tucked space, but I couldn't find anything to say that seemed appropriate.

His home wasn't too far from my own. As soon as we stepped foot into the house, he showed me the most prominent spaces, then my bedroom.

He had asked details about my attacker, and I gave him all I had, which included the street and the time. He didn't say too much, only gave me a nod, and told me that he'd handle it.

I didn't know what he'd be able to do with such little information, and I didn't ask either. As badly as I hoped that he was able to do something with it, I didn't want to get my hopes up. My father did his best to cover his gamblings, so he probably did the same for his goons.

Luke flicked his head at me. "Are you comfortable?" he asked me. "You know...being here with me? Do you feel safe?" His voice was strained, like he was wanting to press the matter more. "Is there anything that I can do to help you feel safe?"

I considered it for a moment, despite my answer already being set. I remembered the peace, and security I felt when he held me at the hotel. It was so hard to believe that I was capable of experiencing anything like that, but when he had me in his arms, it was so evident that I was.

My mouth parted to confirm my wants, but the fear made me pause. He'd probably only done it for his own reasons, reasons that didn't align with mine. That I shouldn't have in the first place.

Luke was watching me so carefully, it made me feel like I was under inspection. I saw his arms tighten over his chest before he cleared his throat, again.

"Once I fix the lights, I'll move our rooms side by side, if that'll help. And, this..." he paused to step by me, raising the pillow of the bed. A knife glinted right under it. Not close enough to knick me, but close enough to grasp if the situation appeared. "You won't need it, but if it makes you feel safer, I'll make sure to leave them in different spots around the house. And, guns, too. If you don't know how to use one, I'll teach you myself. I can take you out tomorrow so that you can choose whatever sheets you like, food, furniture, and shit like that."

I was dumbfounded by every word he was saying, but specifically the knife. I knew it was more than strange to have it, but it was one of my protection methods I'd had ever since I could remember. I'd never had to use it, but having it there, as well as around the house, made me feel much more secure.

The fact that he had remembered it made my mind turn. I hadn't thought that a good thing until now.

Before Luke could move, I'd thrown myself against him. I caught glimpse of his shocked expression, before he slowly wrapped his arms around me in return, nearly squeezing the life out of me. His body was tense, but the longer he hugged me, the more it relaxed into a normal state, again.

I shut my eyes, attempting to maintain my grip, despite the heavenly scent of him that hit me in the feels, immediately. It was a mix of a a sweet smell, with a hint of spice. I wasn't exactly sure of it, especially with his aftershave, but it made me want to stay in place.

"Thank you," I breathed out, still holding onto him. For some reason, letting go seemed like the wrong answer.

"Don't thank me," I heard him respond back, but his eyes staring holes into the top of my head was the most distinct response, "Am I doing this right?"

I lifted my head from his chest to cast a confused glance at him. "Doing what right?"

"This..." his eyes jumped down to me before his skin pinked. He cleared his throat. "You know...hugging."

Oh.

I didn't know what I thought he meant, but it definitely wasn't that. I cocked my head at him, then.

"What?" I teased, chuckling. "Have you never hugged anyone before?"

"Is it that obvious?" he returned with a chuckle. "I've seen it happen, though, on television and shit like that, and between other people, of course. It didn't look too hard, but it's way different than I thought it would be, honestly."

I paused at that, my chest caving in at his response. And, at how effortlessly he gave it. It felt like an arrow had landed in the middle of my heart, and cracked it right in half.

I was the first person to ever hug him. Fuck.

Then, I remembered his statement: you can't miss something you never had in the first place.

I guessed that was true, but that didn't make my stomach stop turning. Despite it, I wished, wholeheartedly, that Luke never had to say, or even remember that saying ever again. If I had anything to do with it, he'd forget all about the statement in itself.

"It's nothing to be ashamed about, don't worry." I tipped my head up to his, offering a smile to ease his uneasiness. "I'll show you."

The pink in his cheeks only deepened as he nodded, averting his gaze to the floor. His response was a quiet, "Okay."

My hands fell to his thick arms, noting how warm they were. I loosened them until they weren't as tight, but still snug.

Luke followed suit to my movements, letting me adjust his hold to the perfect grip. The blush in his cheeks had settled, but I made sure to hold my teasing back, since I didn't want to make him uncomfortable about doing this for the first time.

Once I had it, I smiled up at him. "Now we just..." I paused at the indecipherable emotion pumping through his gaze.

We watched one another carefully, but the intensity in his eyes nearly me had me running from fear of it matching my own.

With as much strength as I could muster, I tore away from the string, instead focusing on my next set of words. It was hard to find them, now, though.

Clearing my throat, I nodded at myself to continue. "Now, we just lean into each other. You can tighten your grip a bit when you do, if you want," I instructed, softly. "Or, just do whatever you think is right—"

Before I could finish, Luke was pulling me back in. One arm remained on my waist, holding me to him, and the other sat still on the middle of my back.

With hands so large they were nearly bigger than my head, he gentled them as if he were handling a baby. The warmth in my body seemed to turn into a boiling sensation the longer his arms were around it.

That fear of tonight's events seemed to have vanished into nothing the moment I felt him squeeze my body enough to alert me of his own.

"Is this right?" he questioned so closely to my ear, I felt the skin grow hot. The skepticism in his question had me returning back to reality. "Or, am I holding you too tight—"

Since we were still tangled, I sunk right back into his hug. His large frame seemed to flow over mine without effort. "You're doing it perfectly, dingus," I breathed out, my eyes shutting to embrace the warmth. There was no doubt of the waves of security that washed over me. "I swear you are."

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Hey, babes! I hope you're enjoying the story so far! These next couple chapters were some of my favorites to write! I have a couple questions that I'm curious about!

1st: Which is your favorite out of the evil trio: Kade, Luke, or Levi? I personally can't answer this bc I love them all. 😂

2nd: Which lover boy is your favorite? Kade or Luke?

3rd: What's been your favorite moment so far?