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"Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it." — Charles R. Swindoll.
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Chapter 26|part 2
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Kade's eyes flickered between his mother and I before eventually landing on me.

His brows lurched up. "What are you doing here?" Accusation was far more evident than the curiosity in his tone.

I stood up so quick, I thought I'd turn the chair over. "I was looking for you." I had to stop from grimacing at how creepy I sounded.

His expression was blank, but I thought I may have caught a glimpse of shock. By his sweat drenched hair, and dirt smudged face, I could tell that he wasn't expecting me.

"So...I'll just go," I murmured awkwardly.

I turned toward his mother, who was sitting right behind me with her eyes on her son. "It was nice talking to to you, Mrs. Ryder, and thank you for the food. It was amazing."

She smiled, placing two arms on the island. "You're very welcome, it was nice to talk to someone. Come by anytime you would like, dear."

I looked back to Kade, whose eyes were stuck on his feet. I headed toward the open front door, ready to flee the tense atmosphere. Raven would take a while to get back here but the outside had to be better than this right now.

"Kimberly," I heard Kade call out. "Uh...you wanna come upstairs?"

I turned around at Kade's choked voice. He tilted his head, burying his dirty hands in his jeans. "I mean...you know, if you want."

I contemplated the offer in my head. A part of me knew I was skeptical that by the end of today, we would end up right where we started. Arguing and holding hatred toward one another.

But, another part of me begged to differ. Susie's words were pressed into my brain now, and there was no way I would be able to forget so easily. I could run, I could pretend it was all for my diary, but in reality...I didn't think it was.

"Sure," I accepted with a thin smile.

He nodded, motioning for me to go up before him. As I walked up the stairs, I glanced behind me swiftly.

He was running a battered hand through his damp hair, hard eyes on the wood. I only had one step left, but I was so sure that I would fall right from it if I continued to watch him.

His room was the same as it was the last time I had seen it. Big and silent.

I turned to face him but felt my face flush. Kade looped one hand around the door, ducking his head as he entered the room behind me. It was a quick notion, but I blamed my attraction on the fact that he was far too handsome to be real.

He didn't catch it, to my gratification. "What did you want?" he asked, shutting the door behind him.

I gulped, my throat returning back to it's dry state. I beat my mind into pieces for a response, before finally answering.

I can do this. Squaring back my shoulders, I adjusted my gaze to him. "I wanted to speak to you."

He turned his back to me, not answering. I watched as his arms raised above his head. Just a couple of more inches and he'd be close to the ceiling.

I bit so hard down on my tongue, it ached. As he went to remove his shirt, he staggered a bit, but quickly caught his composure once he caught me staring.

I held my breath as his eyes met mine in the mirror.

"Are you drunk?" I asked.

I knew that it was none of my business, but my curiosity got the best of me. I figured I knew the answer, but a confirmation didn't hurt.

His face was contoured by his confusion. "What?"

"You can barely hold yourself up. Are you drunk?"

His eyes fell from mine in the mirror. "It's nothing for you to worry about, sweetheart," he sighed.

My legs seemed to have a mind of their own. They carried me right behind Kade's stiff body. I wasn't sure if he had just gotten tense at my approach, or if it had already been that way.

"Why do you do this to yourself?" I asked, finding his eyes in the mirror again.

Kade's eyes were stuck on mine, never once leaving this time. "Because I can."

"That's not a—"

"You sound like my mother," he sighed again, shaking his head.

I shrugged. "Because she's right. Alcohol doesn't blur out everything, it only hurts you," I tried to convince him. "Plus, it's temporary."

Kade scoffed. "It seems that's what we were created for. To hurt each other and ourselves."

I shook my head. "It's the other way around, actually."

"Don't tell me you believe in that shit."

I shrugged my shoulders. "I do, I can see it happening."

He cocked a brow at me. "Not everyone is capable of love and all that soft shit, Kimberly. No matter how bad you want them to be," he chuckled under his breath.

"I don't believe that," I argued.

Kade shook his head, then began to walk away.

Panic seized me until I found myself saying, "Hold on."

He turned toward me with a light scowl. "What?"

My mouth grew fumbled at the intensity of his stare. "Where were you?"

He leaned against the frame of his bathroom door, crossing his arms across the landscape he called a chest. "Why do you care?"

I thought about that for a moment. He was right, why did I care?

"I don't, I just—"

He pointed toward the exit. "Then, there's the door." With those parting words, he walked into his bathroom. By the sounds of water, I knew he had gotten into the shower.

I sunk into the angry atmosphere, my emotions stirring right into frustration. I came here to form a calm ground between us, not to add to the fire. But, whatever. I wasn't going to be the only one trying here, when he so obviously didn't care. He was the one to ask me to come upstairs.

I should go.

I reached the exit at the same time I heard a loud thump.

"Shit!" I heard Kade curse among several others.

There was shuffling from downstairs. "Is everything okay up there?" Mrs. Rider called up.

I froze, daring my mind to catch up with me. I thought quickly before hurriedly walking out of Kade's door. I stepped close to the staircase railing, and saw Mrs. Ryder's concerned expression.

"Everything is fine," I smiled at her, hoping it was a bit convincing.

It seemed to work by her soon relaxed expression. She smiled back, and returned to had her attention before.

Carefully, I shut Kade's door behind me. I hurried into his bathroom, and was quickly hit with the fogginess of the shower. He must have had it scorching hot.

"Kade?" I called out.

I heard his groan before actual words, "What do you want?"

I stepped closer to his voice. "Are you okay?"

I couldn't see his face, but by his tone, I could tell he was in pain.

"I'm fine," his voice sounded as if he had chewed on rocks.

I got closer until I saw the beginning of his feet. "You're obviously not okay—"

"I am, just get the hell away from me," he grunted roughly.

"Kade—"

He cursed, his tone rougher than before. "Kimberly, just get away from—"

"No," I snapped. This ungrateful ass bastard. "I'm helping you, and I'm not leaving you when you're hurt."

I was far louder then I intended to be, and by his flinch of surprise, I knew he hadn't expected my outburst either.

I huffed past the frustration. "I-okay, let's just get you up first," I said to him.

I bit into my lip, hoping to find some type of idea. When nothing came to mind, Kade's voice marched right in.

"I can get up," he mumbled, narrowed gaze on me. "On my own."

I shook my head at his stubborn attitude. Biting my grin back, I watched him struggle to stand.

Too stuck on basking on my gloat, my brain coerced out an important fact about Kade.

He's naked.

"Kade," I struggled out as I averted my eyes elsewhere. Anywhere but hun.

I felt his gaze land on me.

I hurriedly threw a towel at him, never removing my eyes from the tiled floor. "You might need this."

Kade's scoff was loud and clear. "What? You don't want to see my—" His sentence was cut short as he lost his balance once again.

Instincts told me to prevent an accident. Before he made impact with the ground, I reached for his body desperately.

My hands had no correlation of where they were going, all they knew was that they were trying to prevent a fall. But, once they touched him, the message was quickly sent to my brain.

I touched his—

My cheeks were as red as the bloody sea. "I'm so sorry; I didn't mean to." Out of all of the moments, out of all the secrets he had read within my diary, this was the one that would break me.

"Kimberly," he said my name with heaps of something. Whatever it was, I think I might have felt it edge out whatever discomfort I had right now.

"Yes?" I looked up at him, trying to mask my abashment. It wasn't going anywhere though.

Kade stared down at me, his gaze frosted over. Despite us being in the steamy bathroom, my limbs were frozen by my tenacious fear of his reaction.

He's going to lie to his friends about this. He's going to tell the entire school I gave into him. Say that he got into my pants, tell them I was a slut.

"I don't feel too good," he mumbled as he pushed off of me to get to the toilet.

Kade landed on his knees by the toilet, immediately going head first over the seat. In a heartbeat, the contents of his stomach were released into the toilet until he was forced to dry heave.

I didn't know what to do. Sure, I had been around sick people before, but never one that made my stomach and heart twist and turn by one look.

Slowly, I placed my hand on his back. Just as I had seen in the movies, I rubbed his back while he continued retch.

After an abundance of heaving, his head raised from the toilet. I stared at him, noting the way his expression was one of an ill man.

I stepped back for his large frame. "Alright, c'mon." I offered my hand out to him.

I expected him to argue, to fight back. But, instead he took my hand in a weak grip, and lifted himself up.

"Lean on me," I said to a half-dazed Kade.

I braced my shoulders as he placed some of his weight onto me. The bed is only a few steps away, I encouraged myself.

It was hard to hold his heavy body up, but once we reached his bed, I smothered a scream of glee.

I tried to lower him on the bed slowly, but gravity decided to argue. I cringed as he landed hard on his back, but his mattress took him in just fine.

My hand went to his forehead for a fever. Heat radiated from his body, and my nerves grew wildly. What am I going to do?

"Kimberly?" Mrs. Ryder soft voice matched the gentleness of her knock.

A breath passed, before she began to speak again. "Can you come out here for a second?" I threw a couple of blanket's over Kade's naked form, then shut the door behind me. I forced a sweet smile to his mothers' face.

"I was just called into a business trip. And, that means I won't be back here, possibly until the end of next week," she stressed, the small bags under her eyes adding onto her tired look.

I nodded, listening carefully. Why was she telling me this? I thought.

"I want you to do something for me while I'm gone," she scanned over me for a reaction, which I hid carefully behind my mask.

I awaited for her to speak again, despite my eardrums being entirely occupied by the pounding of my heart.

Susie reached for me, taking my hands in hers. "I was wondering if you would drop by a few times to check on Kade, make sure he's not doing anything too wild, you know?"

I nodded, despite me wanting to do the opposite. "I-I get it." Did she really trust me that much already, and if so, why? If only she knew that her presuppositions were entirely wrong.

Her smile could light up a room better than the stars. "Thank you, Kimberly. I'm about to head out now, but I figured Kade wouldn't speak to me." A perfectly manicured hand swept through her hair. "I'm sorry for the bother, but could you just tell him that I love him? And, that I'll be back as soon as possible."

My head shook in a nod on its own, but it took a good amount of strength not to scream in frustration. She was going to leave me here with him.

We said our last goodbyes, and she left. Just like that, she was gone.

I walked back into Kade's room, and reached his bathroom quickly. Wetting a towel, I squeezed the excess water out of the fabric.

I walked to his bed, which held an overly quiet Kade. His eyes were slightly closed, but he still shown signs of consciousness.

Slowly, I placed the cold rag on his forehead. His only visible reaction were his eyes snapping open, then closing again.

"Does your head hurt?" I asked him in a soft voice as he groaned in agony.

"No," he grunted, squeezing his eyes shut even tighter.

I looked at him with a perked brow. "Then, what hurts?"

"Nothing."

I scowled, ignoring the way his voice held frustration toward me. His chest began to bounce rapidly as he leaned up to cough up his guts.

Medicine.

I stood up from my stance on the bed, walking over to the door. I paused as I heard Kade behind me.

"Where are you going?" His voice was grumpy, tired, sad. It was a shock.

I turned back to the slightly conscious Kade. "I'm just going to get medicine," I reassured him.

His response was a nod of a head, but his eyes remained shut. I let a beat past before walking out of his room and down the stairs.

I didn't know where to go. I had no idea where Mrs. Ryder kept their medicine, if they even had any at all.

I decided on searching the downstairs bathroom first for any medication that could help whatever the hell was wrong with him. I opened the cabinets, and suppressed a scream of gratitude at the two rows of medication stocked up.

I grabbed the first bottle I saw, which was partially empty.

Even though it said nothing about helping nausea, my curiosity was still high. I frowned in confusion, but continued to read over the label.

I knew this was one; it was a mood stabilizer.

What?

I immediately put the bottle back, and reached for a different one, hoping to find what I had came in here for.

Symbyax, the label on the front of the bottle read. I searched the bottle and quickly found that it was used to treat depression and the effects of a bipolar disorder.

I sucked in my gasp, and hurriedly placed all of the bottles back where they came from. My mind was all over the place, and I couldn't stop myself from grabbing another one of the bottles.

Topamax, this one read. I knew that by the name, I wouldn't want to know what it was this time.

After a good ten minutes in the bathroom, I finally found what I was looking for. I had never heard of the medication, but the information on the bottle read that it treated nausea so it'd have to do.

I walked back up the long stairs, my thoughts long gone. What was it with the mood stabilizers in their bathroom? Was it possible that Kade used them? Or was it just a thing his mother used to keep her own trauma under control?

My head was beginning to hurt with all of the assumptions. I knew it was none of my business, but I guess I needed to find something, anything that could lead to my final conclusion.

By the time I made it back up the stairs, Kade was asleep. His pink lips were parted in his sleep, allowing small puffs of air to leave him and his chest to rise and fall from his rest. One arm hung right across his forehead, the muscles constricting.

His black hair looked as if it were glued to his forehead by the great amount of sweat there. I removed the wet towel for a minute, and wiped his sweat away with a dry one before placing it back down.

I continued to watch his still figure, trying to detect any signs of distress. After a while of watching him sleep, I placed a trash can next to his bed just in case he began to throw up again.

"He'll be fine," I convinced myself as I pulled out a book from my bag to keep my worry down.

I soon grew calm as I relished in one of my all time favorites. The book was a classic romance, and if I couldn't have it, I wanted to live through others' who did.

Just as I got a little too indulged, I saw Kade stir in his sleep. It had been hours since he had fallen asleep. The only thing that came from him since then were coughs, stirring, and snoring.

I continued reading as and before I reached the climax of the story, my eyes began to drift off.

The last thing my eyes made contact with, was Kade stirring in his sleep again. But, soon after, my eyes shut entirely, pulling me into a well needed sleep.