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"Some beautiful paths can't be discovered without getting lost." —Erol Ozan

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Chapter 92
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After thanking the driver, I pulled my things out of the car with shaky arms. I was more than happy now that I didn't bring too much.

Twiddling with the key to my apartment, I watched the Uber pull off. Then, I turned.

Seeing it now felt so much more real than I expected. The feeling was as exciting as it was anxious. I felt a grin begin to build as I advanced toward it.

The apartment was a one-bedroom and bath; it wasn't very sizable, but I didn't care. It was mine, and for the price, I gladly accepted.

I managed to avoid the large move-in truck, which looked to hold an abundance of material inside. Whoever it belonged to definitely brought everything along with them. They could be my neighbor for all I know though, so instead of lingering, I continued on.

After pulling the suitcase up the stairs, I made a silent curse of gratitude that my apartment wasn't too high. I couldn't handle those stairs every day, especially after the walk to and from campus.

Finally, I paused in front of my door. Mine.

My clammy fingers barely gripped at the key as I shoved it into the door. Once I heard the click, I grinned with joy before pushing the door open.

"I did it," I whispered to myself as I smiled. "I did it."

It was here, I was here.

If only someone else was here with me.

I shook the intrusiveness from my head as quick as it came. I couldn't let it sour my accomplishment right now.

With a heavy sigh, I pushed myself through the threshold. Glancing around the small space, my insides swelled with pride.

From the pictures I saw online, I knew I would need to rearrange some of it, but I was more than thankful to know that it came furnished. That was way less money, and time for me.

When I moved closer, I saw a gray loveseat with a sofa and a matching ottoman facing it, both atop gray-brown flooring. There was a brown stand in front of the furniture, one I planned to occupy with a television as soon as I was able.

I left my suitcase by the ottoman, and turned to the kitchen. It was separated from the rest of the room by a wooden countertop. An electric oven, as well as a white fridge and a couple of counters awaited me. I made a note in my phone to add a microwave to the list, then processed to head toward my bedroom.

Along the white walls were several paintings that I would examine later for keeps. My bedroom was only a couple of steps away, but each one left me bouncing in anticipation.

Once I reached the door, I pushed it open. I stepped inside, my cheeks pinching into a wider grin. 

The full-size mattress was already dressed, but I would buy my own sheets and such later. I would have brought my own for a sense of comfort, but I didn't need too much familiarity.

There was a matching white bed stand with a lamp on the side, and a brown desk that I would use for studying directly across from the bed. The blinds on the side were shut, but they would work well with waking me for classes. The only bathroom was in my bedroom, but I'd check that out later. 

My interview was in a couple of hours, so until then, I could relax. The nerves fluttered in my stomach, but since the interviewers had been the ones to reach out to me, I considered it a good thing. At least, I hoped.

My smile never faltered as I fell back onto the bed. I knew I'd have to call my family and friends to secure my safety to them, but for right now, I needed a moment. To breathe, to capture the reality and appreciate it. I did it.

***

"Pyper is definitely going to eat that," I murmured to myself before moving the plant up higher.

Before my interview begins, I decided to head to a store for some light decor. I only bought plants and curtains, but I would get the more eminent things when I had more time to consider the options.

I glanced down at the time. Since it was nearing four, I went ahead and ordered my ride. I didn't want to be too late nor too early for the job, but since it was twenty minutes away, I should be safe.

After I was ready, I flipped the switch off, then checked my phone, which confirmed that the driver was here. My stomach bunched with nervousness as I descended down the stairs.

Once I was in, I gave the driver the address, then pressed my back against the seat. The cool leather did nothing to aid my nerves.

I really hoped everything worked out in my favor. I may have lied on my resume a bit, but by the job description, the work wasn't too hard to understand. I hadn't even applied for it on my own, so I took that as a good sign. They were the ones to reach out to me for the receptionist position, and claimed that they saw my resume through the app. The pay and hours were extraordinary as well as close to the university, and as much as I would miss the diner, I would not miss the customers nor the food industry.

As the drive continued, I tried to pay close attention to my surroundings. I would be here for the next four years so I needed to get familiar with the directions. I even marked a couple places in my phone that I planned to try between classes and work.

"Thank you," I smiled to the driver, hurriedly retrieving my things, and getting out. My stomach fell as I watched the driver pull off.

With a half excuse of a mind, I grasped my wristlet with a small plea of luck as I stared at the building.

It was a couple stories tall, mainly glass and spotless. A couple of men and women in tailored, spotless suits, and fresh haircuts marched out with either a case or phone in hand. I could hear a couple of them barking orders into the devices before carrying on down the block. It seemed so natural to them.

My hands began to clam up the longer I stood here. A sense of unfamiliarity lingered inside of me the closer I grew. The anxiousness hadn't settled one bit.

My fingers pinched at the skin along my wrist as I attempted to conjure the encouragement. I could hear Jax, slowly urging me to go inside, and Raven and Maggie just pushing me in, altogether. My dad, telling me to just take things slow and it would go fine.

Past all of them, I heard the one that made my skin grow hot. He edged everything right out.

Say fuck it.

A heavy sigh rushed out of me as I nodded to myself. "Fuck it," I murmured Kade's words to myself. The anxiousness surprised just enough to make me force my head up, gliding my feet along the pavement until I was inside.

I observed the space over, carefully. I assumed and hoped that I would be on the ground level if I got the job, due to its quiet atmosphere.

There were several expensive furniture pieces, all carefully sorted along the room, but they were vacant. I heard the hums of classical music around me, as well as the chatters of exiting workers.

I stepped aside to avoid their stream, but just as I did, I heard my name being called.

"Kimberly," the feminine voice addressed me.

I turned to the side, matching it with the slender, elderly black woman that was coming this way. She stopped right in front of me.  "There you are."

I offered an unsure smile. "Here I am?"

Her beaming smile was contagious. "I'm surprised you didn't get lost in the swarm. I still do and I've been here for twenty years." She paused to release a chuckle before outstretching her hand. "Well, it's nice to finally meet you, I'm Marianne, and I'll be your supervisor. If you need anything—help, ink, rude customers, office gossip, I'm your girl."

I chuckled, returning the handshake. "It's nice to meet you, Marianne. I'll try to remember all of that." She motioned for me to follow her, so I fell into step.

"This will be your station," she paused to point at the space behind the desk: the one I eyed. I had to stop myself from grinning as I nodded. "Lucky girl, most people check in by their phones now, so you won't have to do too much. But, our last receptionist—Wanda, was a trip, honey..." I listened to her talk while we continued on.

After the elevator ride, we carried on down the hall until she stopped at what I assumed was her office. It was finely decorated with pictures of her husband, children, and aquatic animals, as well as inspirational quotes and other decor.

The room smelled of vanilla and coffee, and that, as well as Marianne's positivity helped calm my nerves a bit more.

I watched her pull out a stack of papers. With a grin, she scooted that, as well as a pen toward me. "Okay, so those are all of the documentations. You can read over them and return them signed whenever you return, which will be..." she paused to tap her perfectly manicured hand along the wood before glancing up. Warm eyes met mine. "How does next Monday sound for starting?"

I paused, staring down at the stack of papers, then returning back to her. She was making it sound like I already had the job.

"You're not going to interview me?" I asked, unsteadily.

"What?" Marianne's eyebrow perked up as she shook her head. With a laugh, she nodded at the paperwork. "No, there's no need, honey. Didn't Bree tell you that the job was yours, already?" I shook my head no; the lady, Bree, on the phone only told me basics and location, but that was it.

She leaned back into her seat, arms behind her head as she hummed. "Mhm, you should have seen the boss. As soon as he read your resume, all other candidates for the position were out the window. Said to contact you, and the job was yours immediately if you wanted it."

I mentally cursed this Bree girl for not letting me know beforehand, but disregarded it almost immediately. I would have liked the heads up, but ether way, I had the job.

"Okay." A smile dragged across my lips as I nodded. "Yeah, Monday sounds great."

After I gave Marianne the information she needed, we conversed for a stretch of time before I left. She was so sweet, and quite kind, so I took that as a good sign, only letting it add to my happiness as I headed toward my car.

Even though Uber was great, it would stop soon; I couldn't afford to make it a daily habit.

I texted my friends, who had already began their rounds of check ins. After stifling laughter from our group chat, I went to my family's messages; they were just as urgent.

After the car drove off, I took a couple steps toward my apartment, but paused. Sliding the phone into my pocket, I glanced over to the vacant spot.

The moving truck—which had been here all day—was now gone. Earlier, I heard the items being taken to the apartment beside mine, so I assumed they were now moved in. I hadn't seen my neighbor directly, only their items, which appeared quite expensive. A part of me wanted to say hello, but I might wait until I settled my jumbled nerves first.

It would take a minute to get used to it all, but I would tumble with the obstacles slowly, and at my pacing. I would fake it until I didn't have to any longer.

For right now, I wanted to video call my friends to celebrate the job. I had texted them, but apparently, they needed to see me announce it.

I stepped to my door, again. A proud grin wandered to my lips as I stared at it. My apartment number gleamed back, silently congratulating me. It was surreal to have my own place, and a 'big girl job' as my dad put it. I was proud of what I accomplished.

I paused, again. The feeling pounced onto me like a damn panther, but I tried to shove it back down. It didn't work this time, though, of course. It remained, silently tugging at my heartstrings until I confronted it.

I wanted to share this with him. I wanted to have him here. If things had been different, Kade would be here. He would have congratulated me, a proud glint in his beautiful eyes when I told him the news. He would have wrapped me in his arms, then toasted a bottle of champagne in my honor, but it wouldn't have even been used between our kisses.

I hated that I wanted it to be reality so badly.

I wondered if Levi had told him yet, if his reaction was relief or grief, if he wanted to chase after me. I hadn't even gave him the opportunity to for the past two months, but I could feel the crack widening in my heart every single time I was reminded of him.

I wanted him so badly that it ached to remember that I couldn't have him. Not right now. That part of me remained gone under the rubble, just barely being shielded by my excuse of distractions. But, they wouldn't last forever, and I dreaded the day I would have to confront it all.

"Hey, sweetheart."

Everything stopped.

The key I was holding seemed to blend in with the door as I heard the voice. I shook my head immediately; it was all a part of my imagination, it was.

But, it sounded so fucking real.

My blood only chilled as I heard, "Will you turn around?"

His chuckle sealed nearly every doubt of his presence inside of me. It rightfully belonged to him, and only him.

What the...

There was absolutely no way that this was real. I had officially lost it, yes, that was it.

I had no idea what kind of trick this was, but there was no humor. The universe just screwed me over if she thought this was any form of a joke.

I slammed my eyes shut, my forehead planting against the door. I shook my head against the cool wood.

I heard the footsteps advance toward my distraught figure. "Kimberly," my name on his lips fell into a whisper. A plea. It triggered every ounce of overwhelming passion inside of me.

"You're not here," I mumbled, my words barely audible above the beating of my heart. He wasn't here.

"I am, sweetheart," I heard him say. "Turn around."

My head shook so hard that my vision began to blur. My eyes fluttered open as I reluctantly pried myself from the door.

Every last drop of oxygen hung in my throat as I slowly, but surely shifted my body. I started from the bottom, but when I got to the top...there he was.

Kade.