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Thank you so much for 2,000 reads😘 I can't believe it; you're all so amazing! 🤍

"Get your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty ape!" —Planet of the Apes, 1968 (this doesn't relate to anything, but it makes me cry from laughing lmaoo)
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Chapter 19
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I tossed a pouch of mozzarella toward Kade. "You've seriously never made a pizza before?"

His concentration remained on the pizza dough in front of him. "No."

I watched as he sprinkled a decent amount of cheese on the dough. His brows furrowed in concentration as he examined it from every angle. I turned away to stop from laughing.

"You're not going to use more?" I asked.

One eyebrow parked up at me, his eyes dancing with recondite. "Are you trying to challenge me?"

I blinked. Was he actually trying to have fun with me?

I was still very skeptical of his sudden kindness, but maybe I should just enjoy it while it last. I could use it to my best ability. "I—yes?" I responded unsurely. "Unless you're afraid."

Kade scowled, his arms topping the kitchen counter. I looked away from his sleeveless shirt. "Nah. You make your own pizza and I'll make mine. We'll see how badly yours turns out." His face remained blank, though by the light beginning to show in his eyes, I assumed he meant it as a joke.

I nodded in agreement, opening his fridge to retrieve more dough. "Everything's a challenge to you, huh?"

He tried to cover a smile with a smirk instead, and I grinned at the turn.

"You could say that," he muttered, his eyes raising to meet mine.

We were entirely linked to one another by the quick contact exchange until he released the bag of cheese onto the ground. Its remaining contents scattered over the kitchen floor before the plastic bag followed.

I bent down to help him clean it up. Then, clink.

A pain tore through my head, and we both fell back. I groaned as I pulled myself up by the elbows. I rubbed the middle of my forehead, before realizing that we had bumped heads.

I looked at him.

He looked at me.

Then, we both burst out laughing.

He used his palm to rub at his head. "You should see your face," he managed to get out in between his laughter. It was deep, throaty, and I believe rare. That was my first time genuinely hearing it, and a part of me didn't want it to be the last.

I continued to laugh as I picked myself up. "You should see yours. You're definitely leaving a bruise."

His eyebrows were as close as they possibly could be, and his brown eyes were wide with alarm. I laughed after I caught another look of his face.

I rubbed my forehead. Well, I knew that would leave a mark.

I brushed the dropped cheese from the back of my jeans. "How do we always end up hitting heads?" I asked more to myself then him.

His head tilted, and he leaned back on his arms. "What do you mean?" The deep timbre of his voice filled the quiet kitchen.

I pressed my back against the nearest hard surface, my eyes falling to the marble. "Nothing."

"I think you meant something."

I ignored his suggestion, and instead went to pick up the mess he had caused. Anything to help avoid the conversation. As I went to grab the plastic bag, I felt the warmth settle on top of my hand.

"Stop."

I looked up at Kade.

"What's this?" I heard him ask. It took me a moment to register before I got it.

His eyes were on my wrist in close examination. I frowned in embarrassment before twisting my wrist from his grasp. I nearly forgot about the aging reminder.

"I almost forgot about that ugly thing," I attempted to joke.

I turned back to see that Kade was examining me over closely. I thought I was mistaked, but the longer I watched him, the more his eyes darkened. "Who did that shit to you?"

I titled my head, smiling at the rush of memories. The smile was not out of joy, more like anger and disgust. There was no joy back there.

I covered my wrist with the sleeve of my hoodie, my fingers rubbing over the spot as if it burned me. "My brother."

"Which one?"

I tugged my lip in between my teeth, my fingers tightening around the table. "Collin."

Kade swallowed hard, and I watched his Adam's apple bob underneath a layer of tattoos. He crossed his arms as he leaned against the counter.

"Why'd he do it?"

"Why does the devil exist?" I asked in return.

He shook his head, and shrugged. "I don't know, why?"

"Because we all need to learn a lesson sometimes," I repeated the same words my brother had told me as the knife pierced my skin.

Kade's raw stare continued on, and I raised my eyes to meet his. "I'll rephrase my question. Why did your brother hurt you?" he asked, head cocked.

"I hit his friend when he tried to get in my bed..." I trailed off for my own sanity. I didn't intend to share anything with the man who already held a part of me, but here it was. It felt a little too easy to talk about myself with him.

Ice shards ran through my blood at the rush of memories. One of many, but one of the worst. I remembered it like it was yesterday.

I couldn't forget the weight of his body over mine. The stench of his alcohol drenched breath. His strength overpowering my young body, pinning my wrists to the tattered mattress. His howl when I tore a piece of skin with my teeth. My brother's enraged face. I couldn't forget.

I snapped out of it as footsteps carried over to me. Kade was closer than before now, for whatever reason. "Why would he try to rape you?" I blinked as he struggled to get the words out.

I tilted my head back to look at the tall ceiling. I knew I had to keep my tears at bay, no matter what. "Puberty, maybe? He was drunk - of course - and walked into my room thinking that it was the bathroom. He figured it out that it wasn't the room he intended it to be, but he didn't try to leave. He just kept going until I bit him. He was in enough pain that I could get away, but I ran right into Collin. I think he planned it."

"Why do you think that?"

God knows that I hadn't meant to open up to Kade, I really didn't. But, I had said too much now and I couldn't take it back. It was strange, though. As painful as the memories were, I didn't feel like I was in a therapy session or anything like that. It felt as if I were just giving a part of myself to someone who genuinely wanted to know. No questions asked.

I could only take so much though. Never had I expressed these things aloud. "I..." I paused as I swiped at my eyes. "We should finish the pizzas, don't you think?"

That day was bad and good. I thought my brother would save me, but he did far from that. Instead, he punished me by slicing my wrist, not enough to kill but enough to remind. The only good part was that my father arrived just in time. The damage had already been done though. Physically, and emotionally.

I tried to be grateful since that day that my father saved me. But, it was too late for me. No one could have saved me after so long. I was too far gone, and even though I tried to block it all out, I knew better. I was entirely too broken to be fixed.

Even hours away, their actions continued to torment and follow every single move I made. My anxiety, one of those terrible fates I'd have to bare. I remembered when my father took taken me from my mother, it had taken months before I let him hug me, along with Ryland. Weeks before, I was diagnosed. My father tried therapy, but it was no use.

Maybe that was why I was so out of place no matter how far I ran. Maybe that was why everyone at school hated me. Maybe that was why I was so fucked up. My own mother didn't even love me, and as much as I knew that I wasn't to blame, it was no use.

There were some things I decided to leave out of my diary. I kept some memories inside of my head, only for myself to see. They were mine to shape and reform.

Kade studied me for a moment, before standing up. He offered me a hand, his eyes softer than usual. I prayed that this wasn't a trick, a ploy to get back at me. But, I took it anyway.

We continued to make our pizzas in silence. I wanted to know what he thought of me now, but I didn't. Instead, I relished in the quiet and continued on. Finally, we both finished placing our toppings down. As I shut the door to the oven, I heard Kade speak behind me.

"Your scar...it's not ugly."

I paused, then turned to look at him, but he was no longer by the counter. Instead, he was closer to me.

He was closer.

Slowly, I raised my eyes from the kitchen floor, up to his tattooed neck. Sketched over his neck, was a heart, with the wings of a dove. Writing, in another language was inked in with the artwork on his neck.

"How many?" I asked.

Kade caught me staring at the beautiful art on his neck. "Nine," he answered.

My eyes widened. "Nine tattoos?"

He nodded like it was no big deal. Perhaps it wasn't to him, but it went differently with me.

Without thought, I grabbed Kade's hand. I heard a sharp intake of breath as his Adam's apple bobbed up and down. If I leaned any closer, I wondered if I could hear his heartbeat.

His other had a tattoo of a small cross, with blood soaked thorns sticking out in all directions. But, this one had nothing. It was a blank canvas.

"Why's there not one on this one, too?" I asked him, examining his large hand.

He shrugged. "I ran out of ideas."

I raised my eyes from his hand, to catch him already staring at me. I smiled shyly, before dropping his hand. I didn't even realize how long I had it.

"Do you want to make something else?" he asked from behind me.

"You're a chef now, huh?" I chuckled.

His white teeth made an appearance in a small smile. "I guess you've inspired me, love."

"All I taught you was to make a pizza," I laughed.

He laughed along with me, pressing his back into the counter. He crossed his arms over his chest, and I smiled at the sight. This had been the second time I truly saw him laugh. It was a beautiful scenery, one that was definitely unique. I wondered why he gave them to me.

"I'll take you to the pantry," he said, raising himself from the counter. "Come on."

I followed him through the big house I hadn't even seen yet. The pantry was about the size of my bedroom.

Never in my life, had I seen this much food.

If a zombie apocalypse were to break out, then Kade's house would be equipped and ready. His pantry seemed to have everything you could think of.

He was perched against the door, his feet crossed as he motioned toward the food. "Grab what you want," he said.

I grabbed the food that we would use for the night. I was free styling from whatever I laid eyes on. A bag of tortilla chips fell from the overflow of food, though I was too busy trying to hold everything else to grab it.

Kade took some of the food from my hands. I thanked him with my eyes, before tripping over the bag of chips. I tripped over a fucking. bag. of. chips.

Bags of food tumbled to the floor and I went went it. I embraced myself for the impact of the fall, but it never came.

Instead, I landed on a soft, yet firm cushion. It didn't take me long to figure out that Kade caught me.

In the process, he had fallen back as well. And, I was on top of him.

I was on top of him.

"I-I'm sorry," I stammered over my apology.

His face morphed into series of emotions. Though his lips were stuck in a smug smirk. His eyes danced with mischief as he held my gaze.

I scrambled to raise myself up, but before I could, I felt his hands go around my waist. My face felt as if it had been underneath the hot sun for far too long.

"What are you doing?" I asked him, my body frozen on top of his. But, I didn't go for another exit.

God, what am I doing?

Chocolate drop eyes that I had grown shamefully accustom to, scanned my face.

"I wish I knew," he mumbled before releasing me. My body continued to tingle from the spot he just held.

I stared at him for a minute, examining his now blank face. With one final glance over, I detached from his body.

After he lifted himself up, we both gathered the food and walked back to the kitchen in silence.

I couldn't take the quiet anymore. "Do you want to do something while the pizzas cook?" I asked him in order to break the tension, if even possible.

"Like what?"

I thought for a moment until the first idea popped in my head. "How about a movie?"

His eyebrow raised at me, and his lips turned down in a frown. "I already told you I'm not—"

I raised my hand to cut him off. "If you say that you're not the type of guy to buy roses for a girl and all of that one more time, I will bury your body in your own backyard." I felt like slapping myself once I heard my own words.

Kade's eyes left the countertop and raised to meet my widened ones. He narrowed them at me in shock. "Did you just threaten me?"

I lowered my eyes from his intense gaze. I said nothing.

"Look at me, and threaten me again."

Oh fuck, what have I done?

When I did nothing but sit frozen in my spot, I heard the deep timbre of his voice hit the root of my ears. "Kimberly, I said look at me, and threaten me again."

My eyes shifted from my sweaty hands, up to Kade's hard face. "What?"

"Say it again."

What' was wrong with him?

"I will bury y-your body in your own backyard,"  I repeated, this time a little louder.

"Again," he demanded.

I placed my arms flat on the counter, trying my hardest to mention eye contact with Kade. "I will bury your body in your own backyard."

"Okay, why are we doing this?" I finally asked.

"I don't know, love. Why are we?" he retorted in return, only adding to my confusion.

I restrained from saying he was insane and settled for a shrug.

"Now, why did you say you were going to bury my body in my own backyard again?" he asked me though he already knew the answer.

"Because you made me angry?" I said the words slowly to try and allow my brain to catch go.

"So, you threatened me because I pissed you off?" he said, holding eye contact with me. "Come on, answer me, love."

I nodded, my mind stirring in confusion.

Kade's eyes travelled to my sweaty hands that shook in my lap, then back up to make eye contact with me."Why stand up to an asshole like me, but not to those people at school that treat you like shit?"