Chapter 13 | Seaweed

Kinansela ko ang aking gym schedule ngayong Sabado dahil sa family outing na tinukoy ni Eros.

I was with ate Serin, mom as we met Eros' mother.

"Oh my god, Serin!" tili ng isang ginang nang salubungin kami.

"Hi, tita. Ito nga po pala si mama," pakilala ni ate kay mama.

Nalaman ko na siya pala ang mother ni Eros at ang step-mother ni Lukan.

"Ito po pala si Thera, kapatid ko," pakilala naman ni ate sa akin.

I got stunned for a second. Nginitian ko ang ginang at ganoon rin ang ginawa niya sa akin pabalik.

"Ang laki ng difference ninyong dalawa. What happened to you, hija? No offense, ha," she asked.

I faked a chuckle. I knew going here wouldn't be good for me.

"I decided to become like this, po. I love myself," kunwari ay confident ako.

Maingay sila sa aming paglakad patungo sa hindi ko alam kung saan. Medyo mainit na rin ang pang-umagang araw. Nakangiti lamang ako habang nakikinig sa kanila. Sinubukan kong makihalubilo ngunit halata namang ayaw nila akong kausapin at hindi sila interesado sa aking sasabihin.

Dinaluyan ako ng kaba nang nakitang medyo marami palang tao, hindi tulad sa ine-expect ko. Nakita ko ang buong varsity ng basketball team, best friends ni ate Serin at iilang mga pinsan ni Eros na nagsidatingan.

Worse, wala akong close sa kanila. Saan ako lulugar? Hindi naman ako pwedeng lumayo at magmukhang anti-social, 'di ba?

Anong gagawin ko?

Regret consumed me. Sana pala ay hindi na ako sumama at natulog na lamang buong araw o inuna ang pag-gym. Should I just act sick as an excuse? What a plan, Mia. What a plan.

Auntie introduced us to Eros' cousins. I could almost hear their thoughts about me and their stares toward me didn't help to make me feel better.

Maya-maya pa ay may mga nagbihis na ng kanilang mga pangligo. Halos lahat ng babae ay naka-two piece na. May iilan namang magbibihis pa lamang.

"Nak, magbihis ka na rin kaya ng pang-swimming? Para ma-experience mo iyong dagat," my mother suggested me.

"Mamaya na po ako maliligo, ma. Masyado pang mainit," I excused.

"Okay. Just change your clothes," she insisted me.

Tumango ako at wala sa sariling sumunod sa kanyang gusto. This day was literally boring. Sa susunod, hindi na talaga ako sasama.

I took my clothes and went inside of the large house. The designs were all white and brown, making the place elegant and clean. It had a large living room, I looked up to see the hanging chandelier as I enter.

My thoughts went back when I remembered why I was here. I did not know where the bathroom was. I couldn't find anyone to ask.

Naglakad ako patungo sa kaliwang bahagi, nagbaka sakaling nandito ang banyo ngunit wala. I was about to leave when I noticed a silhouette.

There was a woman standing not far from where I stood. I composed myself and readied to ask the woman for directions. My plan got cancelled because a man went to her.

He wore a simple khaki shorts, brown slippers and a white v-neck shirt that perfectly hugged his body. Lukan helped the woman to sit.

Questions suddenly attacked my mind. Was she his mother? The fact that he was here made me feel mixed emotions. I was partly relieved and guilt.

Our last conversation didn't end up clearly and the words I said weren't acceptable. We hadn't talk to each other after that day and I didn't know how to apologize.

"Thera? Bakit ka nandito?" a voice made me turn around.

It was Eros.

"Ah! Hinahanap ko ang banyo. Hindi ko kasi alam kung na saan," I unconsciously said.

"Na sa second floor ang CR, sa left side," turo niya.

I nodded and planned to walk away. Eros made me stop when he called the woman.

"Manang Drina, pakibaba na raw po ang mga salbabida," utos nito sa ginang na tila nahirapan sa pagtayo.

Lukan turned his attention at us. Drina, the woman Eros ordered, tried once again to stand yet this time, Lukan didn't let her. Lukan convinced the woman to rest and in the end, he walked towards us.

"Ako na lang ang kukuha. Masakit ang paa ni mama," his tone was cold.

"Alright," Eros agreed and turned to me.

"Tara na, Mia?" he invited me.

"Sige lang," I said at pina-una na si Eros umalis.

Nang nakalayo na si Eros ay hinarap ko muli si Lukan na nagtatanong ang mga mata sa akin.

"Siya... ang mama mo?" I asked him, trying to at least strike a conversation.

"Oo. Kukunin ko na ang mga salbabida," he excused himself.

The way he treated me was acceptable and I shouldn't complain if he chose to distance himself from me. It was my fault, I let myself speak at the moment my mind was a blur.

With a heavy heart, I walked toward the restroom. It was huge and arranged by cubicles like the usual restrooms of resorts. I opened one and went inside of it.

I silently took of my clothes. I was busy with myself when I heard few voices entering the restroom.

"Nakita niyo 'yong kasama ni Serin? I can't believe it! She's such an ugly girl," a girly voice said.

"And fat. Super. Is she her sister or something?" another girl stated.

"Baka naman ampon lang sa angkan?" the third voice tried guessing.

"The hell I care. Dapat hindi na siya sumama, napapahiya niya lang si Serin niya," the second voice said.

Wow, they were talking about me like I did something bad. I wanted to burst a laugh because of their assumptions.

"True, girl. Hindi na siya nahiya. Mukha pa siyang mataray and anti-social," the first girl said.

"Pero God! Iyong step-brother ni Eros ang gwapo!" the second girl changed their topic.

"True, sister. Aakitin ko siya," the third girl joked or many really meant it.

"Ang real mother niya raw ay katulong lang ng mga Entel," the first girl shared.

"Oh my god!" they reacted.

"And hindi raw nila sinusuportahan ang financial needs ni Lukan," the first voice added.

"Paano mo nalaman?" they asked.

"From Eros..." she answered.

"So, in short, walang pera si Lukan? Sayang. Ang gwapo pa naman niya."

"There are hotter guys anyway. Tara na!"

I heard the door slam as it closed. I chuckled and comforted myself.

Ganoon? Ganoon lang sila kabilis magbago ng isip? Porket walang pera si Lukan, ayaw na nila? Oh God. What is happening in this world?

Ang lakas nilang mangdikta na anti-social ako. Was it really my fault to be anxious?

Because of their opinions, some people do not try socializing anymore... tulad ko. I have been judged ever since so I have been away from people which was something not good.

Alam kong dapat makihalubilo ako... pero ang hirap. Ang hirap lalo na kapag ramdam mong hindi ka nila gusto. Ang hirap lalo na kapag hindi ka nila tinatratong normal na tao.

If you want someone to be sociably healthy, then make them feel accepted.

Funny how I wished for them to appreciate me when I, too, judged someone. I realized that I was slowly becoming like them: cold and closed minded.

Lukan may show himself occasionally but how come I didn't think earlier that those were the times I needed someone to talk to. He was always present when I needed help. I was the one who avoided him because of my fixed mind set.

I sighed for the nth time.

I fixed myself and scanned my body on the human size mirror before exiting the restroom. Wala sa sarili kong hiniling n asana ay makita ko si Lukan upang maka-usap ng mabuti.

I couldn't let another day pass without us talking.

Hindi na ako nagulat nang naabutan ko si Lukan sa living room. He was busy with his phone and looked not in the mood for anyone.

I didn't let the fear consume me. I tried walking towards him with shaking knees.

"Lukan..." tawag ko sa kanya.

He immediately looked up to me and waited for my next word. His eyes had nothing but a blank thought.

"I'm sorry," I apologized.

His mouth slowly parted because of what I said.

"I'm so sorry," I repeated sincerely.

"I realized things and I didn't like that slowly, I became like them. God, I'm sorry," I expanded though I wasn't sure if he got what I meant.

He stood up, he was now taller than me. His eyes were full of foreign emotions.

"It's okay, princess... I understand," he said.

I didn't know what to say next because he finally called me his princess again.

"Okay na ba talaga?" I asked.

He smiled and I felt like my soul got blessed.

"Oo... ayos na ako. Ikaw?" he asked back.

"Good because finally we're back from before," I answered.

He nodded, his smile didn't leave.

"May gagawin ka ba?" he asked me.

I tried recalling if mayroon ba.

"Wala naman..." I answered.

"Good... let's hang out?" he offered.

For the first time, "Yes, sure," I answered.

"Akala ko tatangi," he whispered.

"I'm so done denying, Lukan," I said.

Nauna akong lumakad palabas ng living room at nilagay sa aming pwesto ang aking mga dalang gamit. I saw Lukan walking towards me. I unconsciously looked at my mother who was busy conversing with the others.

"Bihis lang ako. Hintayin mo ako," imporma ni Lukan sa akin nang siya'y nakalapit.

"Go lang," I said.

I applied sunscreen for protection while waiting for Lukan. Tahimik kong inabala ang sarili nang nagsalita si mama.

"Maliligo ka na?" she asked.

"Opo, kasama ko si Lukan," I answered.

"Nandito siya?" gulat na tanong ni mama.

"Opo, sa loob kami nagkita," sagot ko.

"Mabuti naman at nagkita kayo," ani mama.

"Mia?" Lukan called me from behind.

"Tara na?" I asked him.

"Oo... hi po, tita," bati niya sa aking ina.

"Hello, Lukan. Sige na, hangga't hindi pa masiyadong sikat ang araw," sabi ni mama.

I closed the lotion and stood up. Lukan was now shirtless and it bothered me. I was thankful when he didn't notice my sudden reaction.

"Marunong ka bang lumangoy?" he asked me as we walked.

"Oo... ikaw?" I asked back.

"Oo naman! Goods 'yan... makakarating tayo sa medyo malalim, maganda roon lumangoy," he said.

"Saan ba tayo?" I asked him because we were slowly walking away from the crowded place.

He pointed not far from where we were.

"Doon tayo, masiyadong maraming bisita... baka hindi ka sanay na makita nila tayong magkasama o..." he said and shrugged.

Right.

"And I'm not used to crowds," I said.

He smiled, "Nasasanay ka na ba sa akin?"

"Hindi pa masiyado pero okay lang," sagot ko.

Nakalayo na kami mula sa ingay at tanging ang maliliit na alon na lamang ang aking narinig. I appreciated the place this time. I didn't have time earlier to look around because I was consumed with so much thoughts.

"Tara na!" sigaw ni Lukan nang nakangiti.

Tumakbo siya't sinalubong ang dagat. I removed my slippers. I laughed genuinely and jogged towards the clear sea. The water was warm and relaxing. The sand massaged my feet and I liked the feeling of it against my skin.

Lukan showed me a seaweed. He opted to throw it at me ngunit mas may naisip siyang kabaliwan.

"Ano na namang trip mo?" natatawa kong tanong nang kumuha siya muli ng seaweed.

He put the first seaweeds he got on the top of his head. I chuckled when I realized his crazy plan.

"Lapit ka..." utos niya sa akin habang inaayos ang akin.

I let him fix my hair. He put my seaweeds above me and we both looked like idiots.

"What? We're the royal seaweeds?" I joked.

He smiled, "Bagay naman sa atin kasi bagay tayo."

I laughed.

"Ginamit mo pa ang mga inosenteng seaweeds para sa banat na 'yan," I said.

"Hindi ka naman nagreklamo. Nagustuhan mo rin, e," he said back.

I smiled because honestly, I liked it.