14: Fragments of yesterday
Karan deals with grief and loss. A revelation threatens Ahana and Yash's relationship. Vani gets a glimpse of a familiar face of the past.

(flashback)

(a year before the current timeline, nine months before the prologue)

It had been three months.

Karan's world had stopped the moment his grandmother took her last breath.

In those three months, life outside had carried on, slipping through Karan's fingers as he stood still. He went through the motions—getting up, going to work, coming back—but the 'food connoisseur' no longer noticed what he ate or even if he ate at all.

Nothing mattered anymore.

The meals, the clothes, the music—all faded into a dull, gray background. His grandmother was gone, and she wasn't coming back.

Since childhood, every effort he made had been for her—for that proud, joyful glimmer in her eyes. Whether it was studying, competing in school events, or playing cricket, Karan did it all just to see her smile at his achievements. He could still picture her, beaming with pride, boasting to her friends about her grandson who always brought home trophies and high marks.

On his bad days, she would cheer him up by giving him a laddoo, and by giving him a hug. She would have faith in him, would praise him for his efforts and would have faith in him that he would do better. She adored him and loved him with all of his perfections and imperfections.

But now, that light was gone.

Karan was sprawled on the sofa in his living room with his laptop- a pillow separating the two. He was mindlessly scanning through work emails. His boss had asked him to fly to the Indian headquarters of his office to Delhi for a client meeting.

Oh, I leave tomorrow. I should probably pack my bag.

He kept his laptop aside and got up. Slowly, he made way to his room. He took out a small trolley bag and put some clothes in it.

"There you go, I'm all done," he muttered. Not having the energy to walk back to the living room, he plopped himself down on the bed, lying on his back, staring at the ceiling. He wanted to turn on the fan because he felt it was hot. But he could not get up. He wanted to cry, but tears didn't leave him. It was as if...as if he had stopped feeling.

The doorbell rang and he sighed. He knew it was one of his friends. Every day, one of them would drop by and give him food to eat. They wouldn't even ask if he had already prepared food. Perhaps because they knew he hadn't been cooking food.

Tara was waiting on the other side of the door, patiently. It was her day to come visit Karan. Everyone had told her to not the ring bell twice, but it had been five minutes since she had rung the bell. She knew Karan would be in a horrible state, but the five minute wait had proved her why all of her friends were so upset after meeting Karan.

He opened the door, revealing his disheveled state. He had an uneven beard grown out, his hair was longer than he liked (like really longer), and he had dark circles under his eyes.

"Hi Karan," she croaked out somehow, and smiled a little.

"So it's you today," he muttered, walking inside.

"Keep the food and leave," he said, settling down on the sofa.

"I...it's already 9, Karan. Maybe we should just eat together. What if you forget to eat after I leave?" She said as she observed him putting on a cricket match.

"Why is that?" He scoffed.

"You're putting on cricket, you know how you are: always immersed in the matches," she said and forced a chuckle at the end.

Out of everything, this is what he hated the most. How everyone wanted to act like everything was going back to normalcy. It wasn't. Nothing will be 'normal' again. His aaji was dead, and was never coming back. Nothing about that was normal.

"Whatever, you can eat here. But leave by 9:30, I have a flight tomorrow," he said.

"Oh, where are you flying?" She asked, worried as she served the dal khichdi she had prepared.

"Wherever I want," he said.

"Karan...this is not how she wanted her grandson to be," Tara said straightforwardly, tears clouding her vision. Seeing Karan completely crumble was not something she could bear watching. From the time they were children, Karan Desai had always been obsessed with perfection. He was the academic star, the sports star and the popular kid in school. From the eyes of his peers, he had everything he wanted.

It was as heartbreaking as losing Shanta Aaji.

"Then she shouldn't have left," he said in a higher voice, angrily.

"Everyone leaves, Karan" Tara said softly, a tear escaping her eye.

Why did it have to be Aaji?

A minute passed, and Tara decided to speak ahead.

"Aaji raised you to be a dutiful son, a reliable person and the smart, passionate individual you are today. Are you going to let all of her hardworking go to drain? Are you going to drink your trouble away till you sleep forever?" She asked, angrily. He stayed mum.

"Karan," she said, placing her hand on his shoulder. "Go see her, she's a very good friend of mine, and a good therapist." Tara said, handing him a card. Karan took it and stared at it for an entire minute and then flung it onto the teapoy. Tara got up and went to the kitchen to bring them food.

(the next day)

Karan had checked in his bag and passed the security check. With his handbag consisting of his laptop and a few other things, he waited in front of the boarding gate at Pune airport. A guy, who looked around his age approached him.

"Hey, uh you're Karan Desai, right?"

"Uh yes...how do you know me?"

"I'm the new guy, I uh...I'm Manav, Manav Limaye," he said, smiling at him.

"Oh, I see. Nice to meet you," Karan said, as the two shook hands. He had quickly shifted from the exhausted, empty Karan to the professional one. Even he didn't know he was capable of such duality.

The flight, the ride to the hotel, everything was painful for Karan yet he maintained a calm look on his face. No one can know what I'm going through.

Manav seemed like a nice guy, he was a bit awkward but he didn't seem pretentious. Seems like a good guy to work with. Manav tried to have a conversation with Karan, but he had a throbbing headache and talking to people, looking at people was the last thing he wanted to do. He just wanted to go to his room, in isolation, finish up the meeting and go back home.

While they waited in the reception, sipping on jaljeera, Karan's eyes fell on this little boy who was playing with the pallu of his grandmother's saree. The two were lovingly having fun with one another, just like he would, with his grandma.

Karan wanted to go home. ASAP. He needed to go.

(after two days)

Karan came out of the airport to take a taxi back home. Manav, his new acquaintance had flown back to his hometown Nagpur from Delhi as he had to pick a few things from his house to live in his Pune house. Karan's eyes landed on his childhood friend- Tara, who was patiently waiting for him. He sighed and walked up to her.

"What are you doing here?"

"I was in the area, so I thought I'll give you a ride back home,"

"How did you even get to know my flight details?"

"Is that even a question, Karan? Is it not obvious that your mom told me," Tara replied and he rolled his eyes.

He opened the door to the backseat and kept his bags and quietly sat in the passenger seat. Tara started driving, but a silence prevailed between the two.

"I know you're here to convince me to go to your friend," he finally broke the ice and Tara glanced at him, quickly.

"Karan, I...I think it's good for you, I mean...you're not in a good state," she replied, hesitantly.

"You...you are right," he said quietly.

"I...something happened to me in Delhi. It was a two-three minute thing, but it happened,"

"What happened, Karan?" She asked worriedly.

"I got dizzy, I think I was hallucinating, I...I don't know," his voice croaked at the end, and Tara felt her heart break.

They had reached Karan's apartment. In silence, they went up to his house. Karan opened the door and the two sat on the sofa, facing one another.

"Did it happen again?" She asked calmly, but internally she was scared for her friend.

"No, no...it happened after I reached the hotel. Nothing else really happened for the next two days." He said, his voice shaky.

"Okay, you should take an appointment right away,"

"I did, I'm going tomorrow," he said.

"I'm glad you're taking a step to help yourself Karan, everything's going to be fine again, I promise" she said.

But aaji will never be back.

"Tara...I just wanted to say that I appreciate it. I have been so difficult to deal with for the past three months, but you all...you all have been so generous to me, so thoughtful and so loving. I don't know if I deserve it, but I'm standing on my own two feet because of you all right now," he said.

"Respectfully, you have always been difficult to deal with, Karan" Tara said and he smiled at her joke.

He had smiled after three months.

"Karan, hold onto your friends forever," his aaji has told him in one of her final days. She was never wrong.

—

Ahana was waiting at a coffee shop, eagerly waiting for her fiancé. It had been almost three months since they had gotten engaged. Yet every time she thought of him as her 'fiancé', her heart fluttered. Tapping her foot, she scrolled on her phone.

"Hey baby," Yash came, kissing the top of her head. She smiled at him.

"Hey love,"

"Sorry I'm late," he said, "My meeting dragged on. One of the partners arrived late,"

"It's okay, Chaitanya did tell me about the delay,"

"Thank God, I didn't see him after the meeting so I didn't know if he told you,"

"Anyway, I need to tell you something important." Yash said, seriously. "It...it doesn't change much, but you might think it is lying...I didn't mean to lie, I just...couldn't say it,"

Ahana looked at the love of her life, nervously sitting opposite her. He couldn't maintain eye contact with her, his legs were shaking. Her heart raced with nervousness, anticipating what Yash wanted to tell her. This can't be good.

"Yash, you can tell me anything," she said smiling, and keeping her hand on his hand. He managed to smile a little. Ahana's nervousness increased as he still seemed uncomfortable, contrary to the fact that he would instantly be comforted when she would hold his hand.

"Ahana, I'm...uh adopted," Yash breathed out and a silence followed. He looked at Ahana, waiting for her reaction.

"Oh," Ahana said softly. "Okay, um...alright. I mean, tumne pehle kyun nahi bataya?" (Okay, um...alright. I mean, why didn't you tell me before?) she asked, confused at his revelation rather than being shocked.

"To be honest, I don't like to say it. I just...saying it out loud is a little weird, considering you know I have never been treated weirdly," he said, but his voice didn't hold the truth like it always did. His voice had a certain hesitation.

"Yeah that makes sense, but Yash why wouldn't you tell me before? Like, we are engaged now," Ahana asked, upset at the fact that her fiancé would keep such a thing from her.

"I know, I was going to tell you then but then, I just...Karan's grandmother died and you were really upset. And then Karan is also not doing well, and I didn't want to upset you more, honestly,"

"There's nothing upsetting about it...right? I mean you said it yourself, that it isn't weird," she said and he looked thoughtful for a second.

"Yeah..."

"But Yash, why would you wait till we were engaged?"

"Uh..." Yash panicked, unable to say anything. "It never crossed my mind, really and I realised that I never told you. It was not intentional" he tried justifying.

"Yash, I mean it's okay. It's no big deal, right? It's just a normal fact, it's okay, you forgot," Ahana said, trying to justify Yash and convince herself.

"That's exactly what happened," Yash said, finally breathing out, a little relieved. Ahana noticed him, and felt a little relaxed. Perhaps it does not really matter to anyone. I should just let it go.

Her stomach twisted with a strange mixture of confusion and hurt—hurt that he hadn't told her sooner, despite how much she trusted him.

Days passed after Yash's revelation, but Ahana could not get it out of her head. Her mind used to go back in the past, trying to pick up if she had clues to figure out if Yash was adopted. She had found some slight behavioural patterns which she thought were normal. At first, what she thought was strict parents, somehow seemed more, something more complex.

Exhibit A: Back in college, whenever his parents used to call on his Nokia, he would quickly walk away from the group to talk to them.

Exhibit B: He would never meet his parent's eyes. Never.

When Ahana met Yash, he was a very reserved and an introverted person. He would also quickly get shy and awkward. Hence, she always thought that he would look downwards around his parents when they'd come to college because he didn't want to start feeling to homely in public. She thought it was his awkward nature. But it could be something more?

Exhibit C: He had never shown his childhood pictures before the age of eight.

"Wait, he still hasn't sent me a baby picture of him..." realisation dawned upon Ahana who was sitting in her room.

How did I never notice? Or did I just...choose to ignore things which were right under my nose? What if...what if his family IS weird with him? What if there is a legit reason why Yash never told this to me before?

"Am I overthinking this? Maybe it's just how families are—quirky, distant at times. But why now? Why did he wait until we were engaged to say something so simple? Was it really so simple?" She wondered loudly.

—

It was a sunny day after many rainy days.

With a bright mood, Vani left for her office in her car. She quickly connected her phone to the car system and started her playlist. Her office was a twenty minute drive, but she often had to navigate traffic in the mornings. Today was no exception.

She received a call from Tara on her way.

"Hey Tara,"

"Hey Vani, you called?"

"Yeah...how is Karan?"

"Karan is well, since he agreed to go for therapy, we can say that he's trying to be better."

"Yeah, you're right. I'm so glad we all have an expert of the field right now."

"Wow, that is so formal! Bari ahes na?" (Wow, that is so formal? Are you okay?) Vani chuckled softly.

"I know it's formal, but seriously Tara, I love you and I am so proud of you,"

"Bhai, are you Vani's doppelganger? You're no way my little sister! She can never be this nice!"

"Uh...excuse me? Did your best friend, Mahi Sen get you pasta when you were just sad, or when you were sick, did Mahi Sen get you soup and kaadha every day? No, she did not. I did, you ungrateful person!"

"I will never understand your obsession with Mahi Sen," Tara sighed and Vani rolled her eyes.

"Whatever, I'm driving. Bye,"

"Yeah bye, good day. Love you"

"Love you too,"

"She can never be this nice," Vani did a poor imitation of Tara's voice, trying to mock her. They had joked like this after a long time. The past few months had been upsetting and painful for the group. Shanta aaji had been a part of their group from the very beginning. When they used to get in trouble, she would defend them in front of their parents and would scold in the absence of their Aai-Baba. Aaji was a motherly figure to her, too. Every little things reminded her of Aaji's ways and thoughts and sayings. Just to feel closer to her, Vani had worn the kurta which she had gifted her on Diwali a couple of years ago.

Vani reached a signal, and had to stop her car. Humming the song playing on her speaker, she was looking around when she saw Sharmila Dalal- her former best friend. The world froze as she saw her, as beautiful as ever, standing in front of the bus stop. An already emotional Vani felt tears rolling down her cheeks. The car's air conditioning buzzed, but Vani barely noticed the cool air on her skin. The world outside blurred, the traffic forgotten. All she could see was Sharmila.

Sharmila Dalal was once upon a time, Vani's closest friend. Vani was even closer to her than all her society friends, who were her seniors in school. Sharmila was Vani's best friend, her sister, Sharmila and Vani's worlds revolved around each other. It felt like a movie was playing in front of her eyes. All the memories she made with her friend- good or bad, played in front of her. Her first crush, Sharmila's first boyfriend, their first sleepover. Passing chits in the class, drawing pen tattoos, they had some of the best times together.

But, life happens. And just like that, the once two tight-knit friends, now do not even acknowledge each other's presence.

Shubh Ganesh chaturthi🙏❤️
Happy birthday Crooning_nightingale ilyy💕