CHAPTER 69

ON A GRIEVING NIGHT

There was a strange calmness that only death could bring. A sense of emptiness. Monami rested her head on the window pane, gently stroking the leaves of Gappu. Abhi was... dead.

No. Not dead. He was martyred. The distinction was everything.

'It... It hurts so bad.'

She squeezed her eyes shut, shaking her head. She looked down at Gappu, hugging it close. She walked to the door, throwing it open. The academy wasn't as calm. Quite the opposite, really. Despite the late hour, agents were wandering around. Working.

A slight breeze made her shiver and she shoved her hands in her hoodie, walking to the mess. The trainers had sent her away when she had shakily called his death. She didn't have any use there. She swallowed the lump in her throat, shaking her head.

'Monami, baccha...' She looked up through teary eyes. Her father gently grabbed her hand, squeezing it in comfort. 'Ek baat dhyaan se sun. Ek doctor ka kaam treatment dena hota hai, jaan dena nahi. Jaan deni jitni abilities nahi hain humaare mein. You will always have people jinko kuchh karke bachaaya nahi jaa sakta. That does not say anything about your abilities. Do you understand me?' She nodded. He offered her a smile, gently cradling her closer and kissing her head affectionately. 'Chal. Tujhe ice cream khilaakar lekar aata hoon. Sid ko bhi bula le.'

She sat down, stroking the leaves gently with two fingers. He was... dead. She swallowed the lump in her throat, closing her eyes. A tear escaped her eyelids and she brushed it away.

'The first time I saw you, uss party mein, mujhe laga... you were a princess. I wanted to be your knight in shining armor.'

That was the last time they had talked. Actually talked. Their last, real conversation. What would she say if she knew? Perhaps... that she appreciated his feelings, appreciated his love for her even if she couldn't accept it. Perhaps... that she admired his acceptance of her rejection. Perhaps... that he was a good guy and she wished him so much love- a love she couldn't give him.

So much he didn't know. So much he'll never know.

Because he was dead.

---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---

"Sir ji, aap kadpe badal lijiye", Ustaad ji said.

Karan looked down. They were smothered in blood. Abhi's blood. He turned his hands over, inspecting them quietly. Dried blood was crusted on his hands, darkened into a pale, murky brown.

He let out a strangled noise, his hands clenching tightly around his.

He closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. "Main saaf karke aaya", he agreed quietly. He hadn't had a chance to take a moment to pause and breathe. He looked at him. "I want all heads and deputy heads in debrief in 30 minutes." He shoved his hands in his hoodie, walking quietly to his room. He would need to throw all his clothes away. They were too stained to wash.

"Karan", Faizi said, falling in step beside him. "Humne cameras ki footage Parikshit aur Prem ji ko bhej di hai. Hopefully, spy ko chance nahi mila hoga delete ya modify karne ka."

"Hopefully", he said quietly. He paused. "Siddharth kahan hai?"

"Kamre mein hoga? Hume kaise pata hoga?"

Karan inspected him. He paused in his step. "Faizi", he said gently. "Tujhe ek minute chahiye toh tu le sakta hai. Main sambhaal lunga. Tera dost tha woh. It's okay."

Faizi looked away, closing his eyes. He shook his head. "Abhi time nahi hai." He rubbed his face.

He nodded. "Main... Main kapde change karke aa raha hoon. Siddharth ko keh ki Abhi ke kamre mein jo laptop hai, copy all the information. Abhi knew something and if we follow his trail, shayad hume bhi pata chale."

"Passwords ka kya? Abhi ka laptop heavily protected hoga. It will take time."

He paused. "Tell him to try. Warna... give it to Sanket. Tell him to open it. Agar... Siddharth nahi khol paa raha, toh we can hope ki spy bhi nahi kar paayega. Abhi jaa. He can work in peace jab meeting chal rahi hogi. And... don't leave him alone. Usko kehna sab cadets ke saath rahe." Faizi nodded, walking off briskly.

Karan unlocked his room, quickly changing out of his bloodied clothes. He stared at his hands. He needed to wash them. He walked over to the bathroom, pausing when he caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror. He had blood on his face. He gently touched the dried blood.

'It... It hurts so much.'

He took a deep breath, shaking his head. He needed to keep his head calm. He needed to work. He cannot stop. He flicked the tap open, watching the blood wash away quietly.

---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---

"Cadets", Karan said, leaning against the desk. He looked around at the eight, who watched with solemn expressions. "I am sure aap logon ko pata hoga abhi tak."

"Yes Sir", they murmured quietly.

He rubbed his face tiredly. It was late. Past 2. While he doubted he would be able to sleep even if he laid down on the bed, his body was starting to ache slightly. That stupid muscle soreness hadn't quite disappeared altogether. "Pariskhit, Prem ji", he said. "Aap dono ko Faizi ne camera ki footage di hogi. Inspect everything jo Abhi ki stabbing ke around hua. All the rooms. Dekho kaun aa raha hai, kaun jaa raha hai. And if you can't see anyone entering or leaving, then saare heads aur deputy heads ki positions dekho. Agar koi missing hai ya strangely uss jagah par nahi hai where he is supposed to be, bring it to my notice. Inspect the footages frame by frame if you have to but kuchh miss nahi hona chahiye."

"Yes, Sir", they said.

"Siddharth, tumhe apna kaam pata hai", he said. "Check the information jo tumhe Abhi ke laptop se mili hai. Chitra, help him."

"Sir."

"Monami, Koel, Bala, Suman ji. I want you guys talking to everyone you can. Logon se Abhi ke baare mein baat karo. Use kuchh pata tha. Try to find out any hints." He leaned back on his desk after their confirmation. "Dismissed."

"Sir? Faizi kahan hai?" Koel asked hesitantly as they all piled out.

"Chhat par hai. Thodi der akela rehna chahta tha." She nodded, lingering for a second before turning around and walking out. Karan raised an eyebrow when Monami paused, hesitantly standing in the doorway. "Aa jao, Monami. Darwaaza band kar do, please."

She closed it behind herself, walking closer to him. "Aa-Aap th-theek ho?" She asked softly.

He nodded. "Tum?" She shrugged a little, taking another step closer. She looked down at his hands, and he followed her gaze, before glancing up at her face. He reached out, grabbing her hand and intertwining his fingers with hers. "Kuchh baat karni hai?"

She shook her head. "Are y-you b-busy? Do you w-want to sl-sleep?"

He sighed, looking at his laptop. "Thodi reports likhni hai. Mujhe... Mujhe aaj waise bhi neend nahi aayegi." He clutched her hand tighter when she made a move to pull away. "You can stay, agar tum chaaho", he said softly. He took a step closer, gently patting her head in comfort with his free hand. "Main disturb nahi honga. I'll... like that, actually."

---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---

Sid pushed open the door to the terrace. A few minutes of silence and some fresh air and then he will sleep. It was the first time he had seen the terrace so late at night, halfway past 2. The trainers had forgone their bedtime, just today and with all the hustle of the academy, no one had paused to ask.

He paused at the figure that leaned against the railing. Who was here so late? He walked closer, pausing again when he recognized the silhouette.

Faizi.

He was... drinking. A bottle of rum was beside him, a little less than half empty and he stared at the dark city quietly, looming over it. Did he drink all that?

"Siddharth", Faizi said quietly. "Hume ghoorna band karo, please."

"Gham mein peene se aadat ho jaati hai", Sid said softly, walking closer. "Phir gham chala bhi jaaye, aadat nahi jaati." Faizi smiled humorlessly. He grabbed it, inspecting it for a moment before holding it out. Sid kept it aside, leaning against the railing. "Do you want to talk?"

He traced the rim of the glass. "Woh humaara dost tha. Zyaada khaas nahi, par dost tha. Thoda... khaali khaali sa lag raha hai. Jaise kuchh gayab ho gaya. Thoda... ajeeb sa lag raha hai."

"It's okay. You can take a moment to grieve."

He smiled, lifting the glass to his lips. "Agar grieve karne mein ek pal lagta, toh kisi ke saath rehne ki khushi aur kisi ke jaane ka gham, dono bahut kam ho jaate, Siddharth." He rubbed his face tiredly.

Sid fell quiet. What could he say really? Loss was a wound that needed time, not medicine. He looked at him. Did he needed time alone? Was he intruding? "Do you... Do you want me to call Koel?"

He shook his head, closing his eyes and dipping his head forward. "Hume akela rehna hai. Woh aayi thi par humaara kisi se baat karne ka mann nahi hai."

Sid nodded. "I won't intrude then. If you need anything... shayad zyaada kuchh naa kar paon, but... I am here." Faizi opened his eyes, offering him a small smile in gratitude. "And I am taking this." He grabbed the bottle. "Main aapke room mein rakh aaunga." Faizi nodded.

The younger male paused in the doorway, watching him for a moment. He would be okay. Right? He sighed, opening the door and walking in.

---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---

The pitter patter of the keys paused. Karan glanced down when a weight rested on his shoulder. Monami. Her eyes had slid close, her head resting on his shoulder. He glanced at the time. A little past 3. Well, that didn't take long.

He kept his laptop aside, before gently clutching her shoulders and guiding her down on the bed. She let out an annoyed moan, cracking her eyes open. "So jao", he said softly, grabbing the pillow and placing it below her head. He covered her with the blanket, patting her head gently.

He grabbed his laptop, sitting down on Faizi's bed. He paused, looking at the door. Should he check up on him? Faizi liked being with people but when he wanted to be alone, that was all he wanted. No people. No one was an exception. He sighed. He would come to him if he needed him.

A knock made him pause again and he kept it aside. It was probably Faizi. Maybe he forgot the key. He pulled the door open, raising an eyebrow. Siddharth? "Kya hua?" He asked. "Kuchh chahiye? Kuchh puchhna hai?"

"Sorry", he said, holding up the bottle. "Yeh dene aaya tha. Faizi Sir drink kar rahe the and zyaada naa ho jaaye, isliye I took it. Knock karne ke baad realize hua aap so rahe honge."

Karan shook his head. "Main so nahi raha tha", he said, taking the bottle. He walked back in, keeping the bottle on the desk. "Faizi... theek hai, na?"

Sid shrugged, walking a few steps in too. "He... looked okay", he said. He frowned, looking at his bed. "Monu?"

The trainer looked at the sleeping girl and then at him. "Haan, woh... hum log baithe hue the and she fell asleep. Aaj yahan hi sone do use."

"Woh zyaada der nahi soyegi", he said quietly. "She will have nightmares."

"Maybe she'll be too tired for them."

He shook his head, staring at her. "She always has nightmares and aaj toh... for sure. I can take her back, Sir, agar aap chaaho toh. Aapko kaam hai toh, maybe... aap disturb hoge."

He shook his head. "Woh mujhe kabhi disturb nahi karti hai", he said. Sid looked at him. "It's okay, Siddharth. Tum bhi so jao. It's late. Kal subah drills nahi hain but you have to work. Toh... get some rest." He nodded. "Good night."

"Good night, Sir."

Karan closed the door behind him, grabbing his laptop again. He glanced at Monami. She would have nightmares? He should keep an eye out on her.

---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---

A gunshot rang out.

'MUMMA! MUMMA!' Monami strained against the chains, staring at the body. No. No. She couldn't be dead.

She jumped as she felt a hand around her wrist. 'Shh', the man said soothingly. 'Aap apni Mumma se mil sakte ho, baby girl. Aakhri baar.' The chains were loosened and she felt the weight being lifted off. 'Jao.'

Monami trembled. She crawled closer, her lip wobbling. Her eyes welled up with tears and she felt a sob escape her body. There was a hole in the middle of her forehead, her dead gaze staring unseeingly upwards. 'Mumma', she whispered. She reached out, touching her cheek. It was cold. 'Mumma! MUMMA!'

She blinked, her tears streaming down. Abhi lied there, a knife lodged in his throat. She gasped in surprise, flinching. 'Monami...'

'Sir?' She reached out, pressing firmly against the wound. 'Sir... sab... sab theek ho jaayega.'

'It... It hurts so much.' She blinked back her tears, looking up when she heard a slight sound. Abhi was smiling at her, sitting on the parapet of the terrace. Monami looked down, finding no one next to her. She looked at her hands. They were red. 'I love you. I love you so much.'

'Princess?' Juhi's voice called. Her head snapped up. Juhi smiled, clad in her uniform. 'Aa jaa, mera baccha. Kitna miss kiya maine tujhe. Height badhkar teri. Kitna badhi ho gayi hai tu.'

'Mumma', she said, standing up. She took a step forward, pausing when chains restricted her. She looked down at her wrists and then her ankles. Chains. She looked around. She was in the cell.

She blinked.

She was lying on the ground. She turned her head, looking at the plate. She couldn't bring herself to even touch it. 'It will be okay.' She blinked, looking around.

'It will be okay', a voice said. Her mother. 'Sab theek ho jaayega, baccha.'

'It is just a dream, Monami.'

Her eyes snapped open. Light assaulted her vision and her hands flew up, covering her eyes. "Monami." Karan. That... That was his voice. She squinted, looking at him.

He was kneeling down on the floor, his eyebrows dipped in concern. Something was in her hair. Someone was... stroking it. Him. His long fingers were in her hair, gently running through the locks.

It was a dream. Just a dream. She was... She was in the academy. Safe. She rolled over a little, closer to the edge of the bed. Karan kept a hand on her arm gently, halting her before she could roll of the edge. "Aaram se." She closed her eyes, taking in the feel of his fingers through her hair. A moment later, the fingers disappeared. She opened her eyes.

"Stay?" She said quietly. She liked his presence, the feel of his fingers in her hair, his warm breath just barely fanning her face, his comforting aura. He was safe.

He paused, inspecting her face. She closed her eyes, screwing them shut. No. She... She shouldn't ask that. He was busy. She opened her mouth. He didn't have to stay. "Okay."

She opened her eyes, watching him sit down on the floor, crossing his legs. He gently patted her head, his free hand coming up to cover her properly with the blanket. She took a deep breath, closing his eyes. He was here. She wasn't alone. She wasn't in the cell. He was here.

---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---x---

Sanju looked over the academy plans, rubbing her forehead as she inspected the personnel placement. It seemed tight. Foolproof. But that didn't matter. Not until the spy was caught.

"Theek hogo", she said, handing the plan back to Mridul, who rubbed his red eyes.

"Ma'am?" He said quietly. "I... I didn't know aap aur Abhi dost the."

She looked at him. "Hum dost naa the."

He blinked. "Oh. I... I thought you were. Aap... poori raat uthe hue the. I thought it was because..."

"Kaam tha." She stood up, looking at the screens around the room. She rubbed her aching forehead. She needed a coffee. "Mridul, thodi der so jaa. Ustaad ji ko kehkar kisi aur kamre mein reh le. Tu poori raat jaga hua tha. Bimaar ho jaayego."

He looked down, letting out a shaky breath. He nodded a little. "It's just... woh mera best friend tha. Training ke time se ek doosre se jaante the. Roommates the. And... now. Uski ek bhaanji hai. Bahut... Bahut baat karta hai uske baare mein. 3 saal ki hai. I... I don't know if... if I will be able to face his family ab. Kya... Kya boloon main unhe? How did this all happen? Kisne kiya? Kyun kiya? In the... In the academy, that too. Abhi tak unhe... unhe pata chal gaya hoga. His parents, his sister."

Sanju stared at him. She... wasn't sure what to say. She had always been bad at consoling people. She hesitantly patted his back in comfort. What should she say now? She cleared her throat awkwardly, walking out of the door.

She sat down on the bench in the mess, sighing and leaning her head back. She barely cracked her eyes open when the helper kept her coffee down, grabbing at it with half open eyes. She was tired.

Her phone beeped and she opened her eyes, unlocking her phone. It was Karan.

Taiyaar ho jaa. Ek ghante mein hum log Najjad waali location par jaayenge. Inform the agents but don't tell them the whereabouts.

She sighed, rubbing her face. Back to work, it seemed.

NOTE- So... Here's the next chapter. Hope you liked it. Please do comment and vote and tell me what you think about the chapter! I would love to hear it. 

QUESTION- As a reader, are you satisfied with my book? Are you losing interest or something, or does this book entice you just as much? Would you be interested in reading more about ZDMN and MoRan or now that it's been over a year since the show ended, you guys are past it?