Well, this sucks.

I have been waiting weeks to get any confirmation where the fuck this douche for an assassin is at, but nothing. Ah well, I have been practicing in secret some swings with my beam katana, so I think I should do just fine.

I'm by no means battle capable, but if my parents' lives are on the line, then I better get my ass together and train hard... and play NFO.

"Man this game sucks." I say to myself as I yet again just get shit items from the dungeons that are meant to give you the best stuff. Welp, suppose MMOs aren't always fair.

We have barely gotten any sort of school assignment to do, hence why I'm just lazing around, occasionally chatting around with Touko. Yeah, I sure did ask her out for a date, and she gladly accepted that day.

Nothing entirely official yet, or we just don't share too much about our relationship, but we were canoodling after she came to me with my new clothes I will be using for my time as an assassin.

She is worried though, very worried over the fact that I have to do something like this, even though she gets that it's too keep my family safe.

Though I'm more than determined than ever after she said that if I do manage to make it out alive for every of the these ranking battles, she'll always reward me one way or another, ultimately even wanting to doing it with me, quite badly at that.

"I only belong to you now~"

Her words echoes, making me go into my most primal instincts.

Of course, she has also told me that the others in Morfonica are seemingly interested in me as well, so she doesn't mind if I also hang around them and the other band girls I will eventually meet. Yeah sure, just as friends, but I do not desire some sort of relationship with anyone else other than my beloved.

Morfonica aren't practicing today, so sadly I can't lay my eyes on Touko's angelic everything, but guess life ain't fair, and never will be!

Heading towards CiRCLE, I look at the photo I took of my new clothes Touko made for me. She is quite talented, that absolute treasure for a girl.

The clothes themselves looks quite identical to my school uniform, only that the blazer has been significantly extended near the bottom, giving it almost a coat like appearance. I use my own school badge for it though.

I guess Touko wanted me to be intimidating looking so the assassin fighting me would get unsure if victory is there for them.

But probably not, all of these people are psycho in the head and needs some serious help, and they won't be scared of me. I just hope I will keep myself sane as well, considering how I'll be going on a killing spree.

Probably helps with the fact that I'm in school, have a normal part time job, and also a wonderfully fun loving and smoking hot gyaru chick for a girlfriend that could possibly handle a million plowings from me and still be in top shape..!

...Ahem, anyways, towards CiRCLE I go.

Whistling a certain tune, I soon arrive at CiRCLE, and coincidentally, the girls in Poppin'Party arrives.

Ah yeah, of course I have met some of the band girls, the hell did you think, dear reader? I've just been around with all of the members in Morfonica?

...Oh yeah, Touko...

And then there is Poppin'Party, but Kasumi is really the only one interesting me, she's that typical genki girl, but damn if she isn't positive of her, but her positiveness cannot rival Touko's in my eyes.

"Are you going to work today?" Saaya Yamabuki, the drummer of the band, asks me as she looks to me, the rest also doing the same.

"It's always nice having you around, you've really helped Marina a lot after all!" she tells me, with me just letting out a light chuckle before replying.

"Nah, I'm just doing my job."

"Huh, the usual answer from you." Arisa Ichigaya, the funbag keyboardist of the band, says in response to my reply.

"What else am I supposed to say then? I have my job solely to survive." I say as I shrug my shoulders, Arisa sighing.

"Well, Saaya is still right though, you are great with what you are doing for us all, even if you haven't met all the bands yet!" the ever so positive Kasumi Toyama, the vocalist and first guitarist of the band, says to me as she is looking as adorable as ever.

"Mhm, I agree on that!" Tae Hanazono, the second guitarist, replies as she looks quite determined as well.

"W-why are you four always like this around Stephan..?" Rimi Ushigome, the bassist of the band, asks as she looks as confused as ever whenever her bandmates begins speaking to me.

Guess not the biggest fan of me, even if I haven't asked her myself why she always looks so distraught whenever stuff like this happens.

But before I head inside, I spot five girls I haven't seen before, though these one's are giving off a rather serious vibe, or well, at least the silver haired and teal haired girls in the group are.

"Hmm, are you the new part timer?"

"Yea, that's me alright." I reply to the silver haired girl as she closes her eyes and nods.

"Yukina Minato, I am the vocalist for Roselia. I hope you will take your time and devote yourself to our sound."

"Devote? Sorry, I'm already devoted to Morfonica."

"Ah, so you are the boy Touko mentioned she loves so dearly. Well, if you actually know some bands here well enough, I guess I can trust you." the teal haired girl tells me as she looks at me. "Sayo Hikawa, I play the guitar, just like your Touko."

"W-wait, hold on..! Me and Touko don't even say we are in a relationship together publicly!"

"But it's obvious from the way she speaks about you. She loves you, and you love her as well."

Man, Sayo really saw past that? Welp, guess some things can't be a secret forever.

"Well, let's continue on! I'm Lisa Imai, the bassist, nice to meet you!"

Well, that took a 180 degree turn, Lisa is not a serious or stoic type like Yukina and Sayo, she has more energy to her.

Wonder if it's something with gyarus always being so filled with enough energy to always up the mood..?

"I'm the necromancer princess, Ako Udagawa, I play the drums!"

"Necromancer? Ako, that's... a strange one..."

"Hehe... don't worry about it. Anyways, I'm Rinko Shirokane... the pianist, I hope to see your continued work... for us all..!"

Another shy one, eh? Well, socially awkward people always exists, and I don't blame her for remaining mute a lot.

"Anyways everyone, let's head in so you guys can practice!"

For the rest of the day, the two bands work in different studios while I'm dusting off some stuff in the lobby, Marina soon coming up with a soda to hand to me.

"Oh, thank you, Marina!" I tell her as I open the Sprite bottle and drink of it. "Man, I really needed that, thank you so much."

"Yep, even the smallest things can tire you, I mean, you have school even, so of course you will get more tired!"

Yeah, school... right...

Another hour goes and soon Poppin'Party and Roselia are done with their practicing, with them coming to the lobby speaking amongst each other.

The entrance bell suddenly rings and to my surprise, it's Touko! She seemed to be very happy of her as she goes up to me, before having a determined look on her face.

"Hey, hey! Guess what, I found some shoes that would go perfectly with your outfit!"

I listen to Touko's findings, before we go on a little tangent and talk about other things, so I almost forget about the others.

"Ah, sorry everyone..! Well, I do hope you all liked your practicing today!"

Dumbass, of course they would like practicing..! Ah well, what is said is said.

Suddenly my phone rings and I bring it out, only for my eyes to widen, before I look at Touko.

"Well, if that idea is going through, it would be needed to be done today!"

"Wait you don't mean..?!"

But yes, I were serious, the UAA had, finally, messaged me:

"You will meet Helter-Skelter tonight. Be prepared, and head... to the Garden of Madness!"

That last sentence... hmm. Well, I gotta be off tonight, and kill the 100th ranking douche and continue climbing from there in order for me to save my parents!

After Marina takes over the reception, I head with Touko to the shoe store where she found the shoes she thought would fit.

"I suggest some sneakers, will make it easier to run in! Well, considering what you are going to do..."

She suddenly becames almost distraught, which breaks my heart seeing...

"Hey Touko, what's wrong..?" I ask her, caressing her cheek as she lays her hand on top of mine, keeping it in place.

"I'm... still scared over what might happen with you... I believe in you that you will do it, I really do..!" she tells me as she hugs me. "But you never know what those kind of sick people have in store..."

"I'm... worried as well."

I am, I can't hide the fact that even though I'm determined to save my parents from assassins, the worry that I might die lingers.

I don't want to die and lose someone like Touko either, hence why I am fully set on doing this and win this.

"When you come back to CiRCLE tomorrow, I will absolutely smother you with kisses~"

Touko gives me a kiss on my cheek before we take and pay for the sneakers, which I honestly think looks great, not too dark of them, but still fits my rather dark assassin clothes.

Night soon falls over Tokyo, and I look out the window, anticipating my phone to ring, and soon enough, it finally does.

"At the top of the nearby mall, you will find your first target. Good luck."

The person hangs up, and I begin preparing myself, putting on the school uniform like outfit, before lastly putting the school badge on it.

Standing at the door and taking out my new sneakers, I realize that I forgot putting on any sort of repellent on them... Ah fuck it, I can do that tomorrow instead, now is no time!

Heading down the stairs quickly, I swear I can once again hearing some loud ass music being played from the massive penthouse that is on top of this apartment.

Rich people really can just do whatever they want, huh?

Soon enough, I exit and take my bike, before pedaling like a madman towards the mall me and Touko where earlier today at.

Stopping in front of it, I look at the huge building, before seeing a man waving at me before he turns around and walks away from the edge.

"Helter-Skelter, huh? Let's see if you are the hot shit the UAA told me you are."

Luckily, the mall was open, papers having been stuck to the windows, reading:

Only people who have been authorized by the UAA are allowed entry.

Well, as if people will listen to that warning...

I soon enter, before a pair of goons come running at me.

"There he is! Get that high schooler!"

Well, I shouldn't have had expected it would be that easy to get to the main target...

Nevertheless, as they run towards me, I prepare the beam katana, letting it fold out before firing it up.

"Alright, practice time!"

Swinging at the first goon, I hit him with a few strikes, before a final blow is laid to his neck, decapitating him.

The other goon tries his best to swing at me, and even block out my swings, before I swing at him from below and hit, before dealing the final blow across his torso, from his right shoulder to the left hip, before he falls to the floor.

I look around, before deactivating my weapon, as I realized I attacked them brutally, ultimately ending their lives.

Is this what all those video game characters feel when they are on a revenge spree and basically regrets it all..?

Regardless, I can't dwell on that. It's by no means right to be doing this, but if they are hindering me from reaching the targets and eventually my parents, then so be it.

I soon enter the personnel elevator to be able to get the top. I sit down for a little bit as I take out my phone, Touko having wished me good luck yet again.

She really wants me to come back in one piece, eh? Yeah, I'll make sure to come back in top condition everytime, all the way till we decide to do it and beyond~

Anyways, I shouldn't get turned on while fighting an assassin, that will have to wait until I finish off this fucker.

Suddenly, gun shots penetrate the elevator door, startling the ever living hell out of me.

"What the fuck?!" I yell out as soon enough the shooting ceases, and the elevator doors open, revealing the culprit. "Helter-Skelter, huh?"

"Ah, the brat they told me would come. You outwitted me, so I applaud you on that, at least."

I did not see it coming with the fact that he would be using big ass revolvers for this fight.

"Well, you seem to have brought guns to a sword fight. Doesn't that make it a little unfair?"

Helter-Skelter just laughs at what I had just said, before shaking his head.

"Sorry kid, it's you who have brought a sword to a gun fight."

"Huh, maybe. Well, no matter, I'm going to kick your sorry ass and take your place as the 100th ranked assassin!"

"Try me."

(Quick AN: Theme is for his younger brother, but Helter-Skelter only appeared in trailers and the beginning cutscene for No More Heroes, so they'll have to share theme in this story!)

The first thing the Drifter did was run towards me, not even preparing his guns, so I just smirk, activate and prepare my beam katana to swing at him.

But as he closes in, he jumps out of the way from my swing, before starting to shoot at me.

This douchebag is just styling on me, what the hell?!

I barely avoid his gunshots as he continues shooting at me, with me blocking out any bullets flying right at me with my weapon, but soon enough, beeps started coming out of the beam katana.

"H-huh?" I say before the beam itself deactivates. "Wait, what the fuck?!"

"Shouldn't have brought faulty weapons to the fight." the gun wielding assassin says to me as he keeps on shooting me, as I retreat behind a wall.

"The hell happened- Wait, no battery?!"

What the actual hell, the auction did not say anything about this being able to run out of batteries!

I shake on it, before starting to violently cock it up and down in front of me, first with one hand, and soon with both my hands, the katana giving off a sound that it's actually being gradually charged, until it finally works again.

"So I have to imagine it's my dick and I'm about to bust out a big and fat one, huh? Works for me-"

"Hey kid, how longer are you going to cower in fear?!"

Ah yeah, the asshole, forgot about him almost.

I somersault out from my cover as Helter-Skelter immediately begins firing at me again, and once again I stop the bullets from hitting me, and now I know what I have to do to keep the beam katana running.

I run a little around the "battlefield" avoiding more shots, before stopping and jerking the katana in front of me, letting it charge up a little so I don't have to worry about it for the next few strikes.

Avoiding more firing, I soon begin running against him, with me actually getting a few strikes on him for once.

"Huh, that's something else, so you are learning..." the assassin says as he holsters his revolvers and soon reveals that he actually has prosthetic arms, from which he folds out a pair of blades. "Let's do this your way then, brat."

We begin clashing like a lightsaber duel in the Star Wars movies, only that he has two blades and me only one, quite unfair still, but not as unfair as guns.

"You can call me brat as many times as you want, I'm not stopping with this until I rescue my parents!" I say to the Drifter, with him only laughing while still clashing with me.

Yeah, I don't have any other motives, and I can't tell anyone about Touko and the rest of the band girls either, they would be in danger otherwise.

"Let's finish this!" the Drifter says as he makes me fly back from a hard strike against my beam katana.

I immediately get up, jerk it and starts running towards him.

Everything goes by so fast, and he prepares to stab. But I nonetheless aim for going at his neck, before feeling the katana hit him as I zoom past him, before we have our backs towards each other.

-Music end-

I immediately get up and look behind me as I see him laying lifeless on the ground, his head having flied off from all the pressure of the blood squirting out.

"Huh, this weapon really is way more effective than I initially thought..." I say to myself as I deactive the beam katana.

While it did it's job good against those goons and Helter-Skelter, it's major flaw is that I need to basically jerk off on the battlefield to have it keep functioning. Ah well, it's responsive at least, so I don't need to worry.

My phone soon rings, and I pick it up, the familiar, mysterious voice terrorizing my ear.

"Congratulations, you have now officially entered UAA's ranking leaderboard at rank 100. You are also now on your way to rescue your parents, good job."

I don't reply as they hang up, soon properly holstering the Blood Berry to my belt. Sending a message to Touko that I am still alive, I put the phone back into my pocket and soon look up to the night sky.

...This is really how my next coming months will be like, huh? School, band girls and assassinations, not every high schooler's dream, but it sure as hell is my reality now.

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☆☆ UAA RANKING LIST ☆☆

NO. 100: 𝙷̶𝙴̶𝙻̶𝚃̶𝙴̶𝚁̶-̶𝚂̶𝙺̶𝙴̶𝙻̶𝚃̶𝙴̶𝚁̶

NEW NO. 100: STEPHAN KLAUSCH

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To be continued :P