Adam ran his cloth over the wooden crib like he did every afternoon, nothing different. Same old Maitlands, same old crib, same old Adam! Adam sighed in pleasure as he looked over the wooden crib before him. He loved this crib, but he never wanted his new baby to use it. Even before the miscarriage he had informed Barbara that this crib was to never be used ever. It was sort of a calming thing Adam needed. But it would be different with this baby, this baby would make it into the Maitland household with love and care. Like with this crib, love and care, love and care for all eternity. Adam paused, he moved the cloth away from the wooden crib.

"Why are you so obsessed with this crib, Adam? It's a crib. Nothing more. Sure it has some very important memories but I don't need to take care of it everyday. Right?" Adam hesitated, looking at every curve and inch of the crib. He loved it with all his heart.

"Look at this crib!" Adam exclaimed, "In all of it's glorious antiquary! Every curve and surface speaks to me, saying pamper and spoil me! Sand me and oil me! Come on, I know to the untrained eye it's boring. But nothing's a chore when you're restoring a part from,"

"Frustration."

"I can't keep doing this if you never tell me anything!"

"Pain!"

"It's like everyday you're trying to break my heart..."

"And financial drain,"

"Why can't you just let me be here with you?"

"It's fun!"

"NOT EVERYTHING IS FUCKING FUN!"

"Folks say Adam," He took a deep breath. "Why do you polish a crib when you don't have a kid? And even if you did have a kid! This crib is too precious for placing a baby inside it, so it simply exists to remind you. Your sense of perfection is just a reflection that you are not mentally prepared to make room for a kid," Adam huffed, grasping the cloth still in his hand.

"Adam. Why don't you live, Adam? Just make a start! Are you willing to take the next step?" Adam placed the cloth down, walking towards the couch.

"Ready set, ready set!-"

"Look at these jugs!" His wife Barbara had entered the room, holding two pottery jugs in her hands. Adam gave her a smile as he walked towards the petite blonde.

"Amazingly glazed and terracotta-ery, I took some clay and made you pottery!" Adam took one jug out of Barbara's hand as she cradled the other like a child of their own.

"The world will never wreck you I'll protect you in a mother's embrace! Folks say, Barbara!" Barbara looked at the pottery in sorrow.

"Why can't you see that ceramics is simply a manifestation of motherly panic? By making a baby that's breakable, aren't you creating a way of translating the terror of making maternal mistakes into clay? Hiding away so you don't have to face being a bad mom!" Barbara closed her eyes as she sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose.

"Barbara. That's what you've done, Barbara! Just make a start! Are you willing to take the next step? Ready set!" The smile returned to her face as she set down the other pottery vase and linked hands with Adam. The two really did enjoy each other's company, sure things could get a little rough at times but for the most part things were perfect. Their ten year plan had been done perfectly! Just one more thing to add.

"Here we stand! At the end of a ten year plan! A house, a yard, a minivan! A baby should be next!" The Maitlands marched around the house, they were anxious. But for the most part, incredibly excited about the start of a new chapter in their lives. A beautiful baby. Girl, boy, trans, nonbinary, they didn't care! They never cared, they just wanted someone to love and care for.

"Together, let's leap of the cliff! Fall forever, then smash to bits! Trapped in a terrifying viper pit of diapers and regret! Are we willing to take the next step?" But still, they were very scared. They didn't want to mess up this parenting thing, they wanted to master it. So they kept holding off and holding off until everything felt right. But something just, something never felt right.

"Ready set?"

"Ready set?"

"N-Not yet.." Adam stuttered, the thought of this child made him anxious. He didn't know if he even wanted to have one at the moment, but this is what everything was leading up to. Shouldn't they just go for it?

"Not yet." Barbara seemed to agree, she obviously felt the same way. But she always knew it wasn't for the same reason, she just didn't know what.

"Why rush?" Adam shrugged, giving Barbara a nervous smile.

"Why rush?"

"Soon enough our hopes and our dreams will be crushed!"

"But not yet!" Barbara yelled as Adam chuckled, but the sad thing was. They had no idea that the crushing of their hopes and dreams would be in a matter of minutes.

"Not yet!"

"Not now."

"Not now." Adam repeated, taking a few steps back before hearing a loud creaking noise.

"Oooh..." He murmured in shock, stepping on the spot once again. Another creak was heard.

"No!" He continued to step on the weakened spot, the creaking sound repeatedly appearing and disappearing.

"See? We can't start a family in a house with creaky floorboards!" At this point he was just begging for reasons to delay having a baby.

"You are absolutley right! Let's add it to the list, with the cracks in the plaster!" And Barbara was begging too.

"The wifi should be faster."

"This sofa needs a castor!" Barbara yelled, running towards the cushioned seats.

"The bathroom's a disaster!" Adam shouted in fear as he ran halfway up the stairs. A sigh escaped Barbara's mouth.

"What about global poverty?"

"What about world peace?" Adam slowly walked down the stairs, meeting Barbara in the middle of the room.

"And there's the whole darn economy!"

"The whole Middle East." The thought of being the cause of a child growing up in a toxic environment scared the Maitlands even more. But Barbara decided the change the subject.

"We should learn Mandarin!" Her excitement soon returned, along with Adam's.

"Yeah! Or Spanish at least?"

"No habla español! Dos cervezas por favor, and that's all we got! And that's not a lot. Do we want a bilingual household or not?" The Maitlands genuinely were confused on that topic, did they want a bilingual household?

"So let's go slow, no breaking a sweat! What's the point of having children if we're drowning in debt?" Atleast the both agreed they would wait until they were comfortable with having a baby. That's what they were both satisfied with in their marriage. That they had the capability of coming to terms with things, and agreeing.

"Yeah we're totally!"

"Completely!"

"Maybe eighty percent?"

"I'd say seventy eight.." Adam placed a hand on his chin, was the percentage even lower than that? He hoped not.

"Ready to take the next step!"

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!" A prescense appeared, The Maitlands somewhat felt it. But they were too invested in this to even focus on what else was there.

"The next step!"

"Zooby dooby dooby, dooby dop and bow!"

"The next step!"

"Zweeby, beeby, boo-bah-bah-dee!"

"The next step! Ready set, let's!-" Before the happy pair could even finish their sentence they were falling. They screamed in unison, holding on to each other with a deadly grip. Then...

THUD

They weren't going the have that baby.